YSaC, Vol. 1495: Max in his first book, wrote about, wrote about…
Large Max Sign
Its a long story.
Its free Come and Get it today or I’m tossing it out.
###-###-####
calls only. I’m moving and not checking e-mails.
Hey boys and girls – are you ready for a long story?
Once, there was a sign named Max. Max was the son of a wealthy count who was very ill. Max went to a party given by Anna Scherer, who was a very good friend of the mother of the queen. Max has a friend named Andre, who was a real prince!
Andre lived in a tiny room in with his friend Raz, who also has a video game where he goes inside people’s minds. Andre decided he needed to get rid of the mean old pawn-broker. He has a funny drunk friend named Simon.
Simon likes to go to bed early and every night his mother would read him a good night story. He also likes having cake with his aunt Leonie. Later he goes for a walk past the house of his friend Mr. Swan.
Mr. Swan was the most popular animal on the farm, and he taught all the other animals to read and write. Then he built a windmill. However, a funny man named Don came and knocked the windmill over. Then he sailed off to try and catch a big white whale named Moby. Then Moby made a record with Gwen.
Gwen had four other sisters, including her youngest sister Lydia, and her oldest sister Jane. Jane fell in love with a man named Mr. Bingly, who was in charge of painting sheep red. Some of the sheep went back to the farm, which was now being run by a pig named Napoleon.
Napoleon brought many many people to meet Max’s friends, and unfortunately Andre got hurt and had to go to a place called Yaroslavl. What a silly name for a place! Meanwhile, Mr. Swan and Dean decided to drive to San Francisco, where Remi and Lee Ann got him a job as a night watchman. He was sad, because he didn’t get to meet Night Owl OR Doctor Manhattan, because they were on the day shift.
Meanwhile, Dagny and Jimmy went for a ride on a choo-choo!
I think that’s enough story for now, don’t you, boys and girls?
Does Sparky come with the sign?
Poor Mad Max Headroom.
I loved the sequel – “Mad Max Headroom With A View to a Kill A Mockingbird Lane: The Subtitle.”
I saw it with subtitles.
I saw it in a double feature with “The Unbearable Lightness of Being John Malkovich”
OOOoooohhhhhhhhh…….THAT Max!!!
I thought it was then that Max said, “Let the wild rumpus start!”
Free if you come inside and listen to my story. $7.95 otherwise (plus [location] sales tax unless you have a dealer number).
The story I want to hear is why Max is not allowed to move with you.
I bet it was that incident with the quart of blueberry-mango yogurt, unicycles, a ginger named Tess, and three duck feathers.
“I’m moving and not checking e-mails.” Sparky is going Where the Wild Things Are?
:sigh:
All long stories end up being the same song and dance.
The Beer Barrel Polka perhaps?
No, it’s the Hokey Pokey. That’s what it’s all about.
Come and listen to a story ’bout a sign named Max
He never checked his emails or sent messages or FAX
Then one day when he was out and fancy free
He met a sign named Office and they formed a company
Selling FAX paper, that is, computers, memo pads…
Well, first thing you know old Max is working hard
His partner is a tyrant, never seems to get tired
Folks said “Max, you were better off alone”
So he packed up his stapler and went lookin’ for a home
A new one, that is, on Craigslist, preferably with a swimming pool….
Wait, I thought Andre was a giant…
Andre was a giant. Max was only large.
This is by far the best literary reference mashup EVER. Bravo.
Max? No, M-O-N-T-O-Y-A, Inigo Montoya, you killed my father, and you are now about to die!
The sign is no doubt infested with jiggers.
*ahem* Excuse me, they prefer to be called “Jigro Americans”, thank you very much.
Come on, people!
Chiggers? Anyone?
Perhaps we should roar our terrible roars and roll our terrible eyes and gnash our terrible teeth?
Ducky, I’m only going to say this once! Punchity Punch Punch!
Good Morning, Litterary Fiends!