YSaC, Vol. 1520: … A good start.
Ok folks, let’s get lawyered up!
Well, not LAWYERED exactly – more like legal…ish.
PROFESSIONAL CONTRACTS FOR SALE 100+ STYLES EDIT & PRINT RIGHTS – $20
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Car Selling Contract
Child Care Contract
Cleaning Contract
Contract for Services Rendered
Construction Contract
DJ Contract
Employment Contract
Event Planner Contract
Flooring Contract
General Contracting
HVAC Service Contract
Hair Salon Booth Rental Agreement
Job Bidding Contract
Independent Contractor Agreement
Landscaping Contract
Lease Contract
Manager Contract
Music Contract
Personal Loan Contract
Simple Contract
Partnership Agreement
Photography Contract
Yard Work Contract
Website Design Agreement Contract
Work for Hire Contract
Pre-Nuptial Agreement
Roommate Contract
Daycare Contract
Event Planner Contract
Booking Agreement Contract
Vendor Contract
Venue Hire Agreement
Performance Contract
Speaker Engagement Contract
DJ Contract
Event Sponsorship Agreement
Music Contract
Durable Power Of Attorney
Medical Directive
Consent for Organ Donation
Health Care Proxy
Yard Work Contract
Cleaning Contract
Swimming Pool Maintenance Contract
Team Project Contract
Job Bidding Contract
Project Manager Contract
Employment Contract
Change Work Order
Independent Contractor Agreement
Extend Performance Date
Consulting Agreement
Manager Contract
Employment Agency Agreement
Basic Hiring Contract
Employment Severance Agreement
Subcontractor Agreement
Book Publishing Contract
Catering Agreement
Child Care Contract
Construction Contract
Flooring Contract
Delivery Agreement
Contract for Services Rendered
General Contracting
Contract Website Design Agreement
Freelancer’s Agreement
Horse Boarding Contract
HVAC Service Contract
Landscaping Contract
Lien Contract
Maintenance Contract
Model Contract
Nanny Contract
Painting Contract
Pet Sitting Service Agreement
Photography Contract
Residential Interior Design Agreement
Snow Removal Contract
Website Maintenance Contract
Land Sale Contract
Wedding Photography Contract
Work for Hire Contract
Writer Ghostwriter Agreement
Timeshare Rental Contract
General Easement Agreement
Cohabitation Agreement
Open Listing Realty Contract
Lease Extension
Neighborhood Rules Compliance Agreement
Quitclaim Deed
Offer to Purchase Real Estate
Realty Agreement
Property Management Contract
Contract for Deed
Rental Contract for Real Property
Earnest Money Contract
Exclusive Listing Agreement
House Rental Contract
Intent to Exercise Purchase Option
Lease Purchase Contract
Tenant Release of Breach of Contract
Rental Contract Form
Short Term House Rental Contract
Lease Contract
Adult Child Rental Contract
Lease Amendment
Commercial Property Rental Agreement
Rental Contract
Agreement to Purchase a Domain Name
Sublease Agreement
Hair Salon Booth Rental Agreement
Rent to Own Contract
Agreement to Sell Personal Property
Car Selling Contract
Rental Contract for Personal Property
Consignment Agreement
Conditional Sale Agreement
Last Will and Testament
Change of Beneficiary
Trustee Resignation
Waiver of Right of Inheritance
Consent to Polygraph
Internship Contract
Employee Internet Policy
Employee Cell Phone Use Policy
Consent to Drug Testing
Debt Agreement Contract
Debt Settlement Agreement
I O U
Personal Loan Contract
Payment Agreement Contract
Consent to Drug Testing
Account Dispute Settlement
Affidavit of Lost Stock
Agent Contract
Assignment of Money Due
Assignment of Copyright
Incumbency Certificate
Confidentiality Agreement
Demand Promissory Note
Franchise Contract
Non-Compete Contract
Non-Disclosure Agreement
Partnership Agreement
Partnership Dissolution Agreement
Permission to Use Quote
Residual-Royalty Buyout Contract
Rights to Use of Name
Residual-Royalty Payment Contract
Stock Purchase Option
Sale of Intellectual Property Agreement
Articles of Merger
Investment Contract
Asset Purchase Agreement
Joint Venture Agreement
Pre-Nuptial Agreement
Mutual Release
Roommate Contract
Business Acquisition Agreement
Daycare Contract
Child Care Deposit Agreement
Attendance Contract
Full Time Child Care Contract
Bullying Contract
Live In Child Care Contract
Safety Contract
Part Time Child Care Contract
Child Grade Contract
Drug Abstinence Contract
Scholarship Contract
Teen Staying Home Alone Contract
Allowance Contract
Child Behavior Contract
Child Cell Phone Contract
Teen Curfew Contract
Teen Dating Contract
Teen Driving Contract
Addendum to Contract
Agreement Extension
Arbitration Agreement
Assignment of Contract
Codicil
Cease and Desist Agreement
Contract Letter
Covenant Not to Sue
Forward Contract
General Affidavit
Simple Contract
Release for Property Damage
Termination of Contract
Affidavit of Mailing
Boilerplate Contract
Equipment Lease Agreement
Fee Waiver
Indemnification Agreement
Waiver of Liability
Stock Subscription Agreement
Contract Amendment
Signature Boxes
Example of A Contract
Breach of Contract: What Is It?
How to Write A Contract
Partnership Contracts
Service Contract
Types of Contracts
Writing Contracts
Services Contract Checklist
Certificate of Assumed or Fictitious Name — Corporation
Certificate of Assumed or Fictitious Name — Individual
Certificate of Assumed or Fictitious Name — Partners
Personal Injury Liability Release Agreement
Release and Hold Harmless Agreement
Sale of Business Under a Fictitious or Assumed Name
Selling A Car: What to Look For In A Contract
Employment Contract: What Should You Look For?
Investment Club Partnership Contract
Child Custody and Visitation Agreement
Convert Separate Property to Community Property
Termination of Business Under a Fictitious or Assumed Name
Withdrawal of Partner from Business Under a Fictitious or Assumed NameDON’T GET RIPPED OFF, GET PAID!!
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DISCLAIMER: These contracts are not to be considered as legal advice. All content is for informational purposes with use of a notary and/or attorney. Professional Contracts c/o ##################### makes no claim as to accuracy, legality or suitability. The owner/company shall not be held liable for any errors, omissions or for damages of any kind. These documents are for your use and intentions only. Once you purchase, you own the rights for edit and said company is not liable.
Wow – that’s a lot of contracts. However, I notice there isn’t a Wallaby Stud Farming Contract, and I need something to protect my interests if I’m going to be taking Gilbert here out for some wallaby whoopie, if you get my drift. I’m happy to see that you use PayPal, which is verified by PayPal, which is a PayPal company run by PayPal.
Still, it’s a good thing there’s someone around who’s willing to work with PayPal to charge me $20 a pop for contracts that have been ripped wholesale from other websites on the web that offer them for free. Otherwise, I might not know where to get my Underwater Merengue Dance Lesson Contract from.
Thanks for the post, Cameron!
Consent for Organ Donor Contract! Sign me up! I definitely wasn’t using this liver to beverage anyhow!
I’ve got this Wurlitzer that’s just collecting dust…
Withdrawal of Partner from Business Under a Fictitious or Assumed Name — includes penalty for early withdrawal and child custody agreement all in one!
Uh, if you exercise early withdrawal, do you actually need the child custody agreement at all? It sounds kinda counterintuitive, no?
Early withdrawal no guarantee of no issue–
Just ask several thousand Enron employees . . .
Or Shearson-Leyman; AIG; JC Morgan, ad tedium nauseae
I didn’t know I needed a contract for early withdrawl. Does that mean I can sue Mr. X for leaving me so unsatisfied?
Oh hello corner. I love Fridays.
And remember, past performance is not an indication of future returns.
Not this Sparky, that’s for sure.
Selling A Car: What to Look For In A Contract
Trust me, I’m an expert, and you sure do need my advice.
Why would I rent one when there are so many available on the Interwebz for free?
Aside from the illegalities involved, is there really a market for wasbands, new or used?
Elebenty doors, Capn!!!!!
They’ve got to make hot dogs out of something, I guess.
“Types of Contracts”
I can has meta.
Sparky majored in “Or get your degree!”
What about a Mafia Hitman Contract? I may need one of those soon. Oh!, and happy Memorial Day weekend beveraging to all, except maybe Windrose; she keeps pushing the punch on us. Punchity Punch Punch, indeed. Is that even a real flavor?
Depends upon the Sub, I’m told–not my scene, I’m more feather than whole chicken milquetoast; not quite square, but rhomboidal for sure.
It’s bloody bird flavor! Albatross!
Sounds good. Do you get wafers with it?
Contracts are nice, but do you have those coupons that I can give my kids so that they’ll do the dishes without complaining?
No? Fine, off to Craigslist!
WTB – Forged copies of my father’s day present
I love that they’ll sell you a form contract for an IOU. Because those three letters are otherwise so hard to remember.
I think the addendum they sell for that one is called the LOL and the standard breach of contract form is the WTF.
What’s in the Simple Contract? The last guy I hired to Simple for me, ripped me off.
It’s really better to find an experienced attorney to explain the Simple Contract, it’s fairly complex and technical.
Wow, “electronic mail”! You can tell this guy is on the cutting edge of technology.
If only there were a shorter term for that, one easier to remember.
Like “electronic-m” !
Well, Miss Cleo turns out to be heavily booked up, and by actual attorneys and lawyers and such.
That, and there are rather severe penalties for using the Postal Service in non-legitimate ways. And, USPS has a rather aggressive IG group who act rather surely and swiftly upon miscreants.
…Does someone want to explain to me what an “Adult Child Rental Contract” is? Are you renting out adult childs for entertainment? Renting out children to adults who are pretending to have kids so they can get nosy relatives off their back/use it as an excuse to get more vacation time/pick up chicks at the playground?
Yes.
Adam Sandler & Sons
Is that About a Boy?
I think the [corey] of that is that it’s a “renester” child domiciliary rental agreement.
A putative instrument for renting Junior’s room back to him when it turns out that The Second Depression has reduced the need for those with a degree in Stochastic Beat Literature Underwater Basketweaving Studies from obscure LibArt colleges, there being a sufficiency of people with engineering & professional degrees to wait tables as is.
[whoops, sorry about that, I’m rather angry about my own circumstances today]
“Adult Child Rental Contract” is supposed to scan as [Room/board] Rental Contract between Adult [Parent] and [Non-minor] Child.
[/corey][/ranting]
There you go, Cap’n, trying to apply logic to CraigsList again.
Just wanted to save our gentle readers from having to parse the meanings from the possible combinations.
I think it is the next step after you realise the”Teen Staying Alone” contract was not binding and you need to recoup the losses caused during the teenage keg party that happened while your teen was staying “alone”.
I have to say- it is awful nice of Sparky to charge me for taking on the nearly impossible task of using Google to find a contract. It’s the $5 fee for a hard copy that really makes this deal worthwhile.
I am really looking forward to the future episodes of Judge Judy after people start using Sparky’s Contract Service. *popcorn*
*coffee slices*
*margaritas*
Wow — Sparky is offering Teen Staying Home Alone, Driving, Dating, and Curfew Contracts! Do they have non-interference clauses for the parents? How many beers are the teens entitled to for violations?
So what’s the difference between the HVAC Service Contract and the HVAC Service Contract? I have a High Velocity Armadillo Compressor, and I want to make sure the paperwork is in order.
Well, the HVAC Contract has to do with the length of time it takes to work out what HVAC stands for, and the HVAC Contract requires both parties to be beveraging.
I think Sparky’s “dash” key is broke.
This as
HVAC-service Contract and HVAC Service-Contract
are different things (one provides, the other repairs).
Or, Spark’ is ever so skilled in Word as to know that under Tools is this thing called Sort; but, Spark also does not know about unordered lists, or columnar formatting, either.
_______________________________________________
In case of need, “HVAC” most generally refers to “Heating, Ventilation, & Air- Conditioning”–which can have some rigid definitions when used as a term-of-art by professionals.
In gratuitous example, a PTAC–Packaged Terminal Air-conditioner, is an all-in-one HVAC unit found in many motels or similar high-density housing structures. Which is contrasted to an MTAC-Managed Terminal AC unit, where a central supply of heated & chilled fluid is supplied to local-to-tenant air-handling units to condition the air in their spaces–typically used in commercial lease spaces.
Affidavit of Lost Stock — I have lost my cow.
Assignment of Copyright — Mine, Mine, Mine, Mine, Mine!
Snow Removal Contract — Wait, won’t it remove itself if you just wait long enough? This could be lucrative!
General Contracting — Army Standard Issue. This is a major contract for private parties or corporal punishment.
Windrose – any idea why when I click on “adores +1” I get a “cheatin’, huh?” box pop up? Honest, I have no nefarious motive. Just liked your comment; well, that and I wanted some more punch to beverage on. Purely innocent, I assure you. You believe me, don’t you? I mean, a man wouldn’t say something that wasn’t true,right? Have a nefarious Mem-Day weekend, with lots of punch. Everyone……. Lots.Of.Punch.
It has something to do with cookies and cash and the like. The system thinks you clicked twice on the number. It just needs a long weekend to recover while we redux.
In other news, I have always believed everything men tell me.
I need the Affidavit of Lost Stock. That damn cow just keeps wandering off. This time she’s been gone for 3 days and I’m worried she’s not coming back because the butcher down the (busy) street we live on is having a big sale on beef. If I get a replacement cow, maybe I need to rent a more secure parking spot to keep her in.
Wouldn’t an Affidavit of Lost Sock have more utility room?
Wouldn’t an Affidavit of Take Stock serve better? It would allow one to evaluate one’s situation, judging the efficacies of one’s decisions, and generally formulating plans for one’s near and distant future. Just thinkin’.
Perhaps an Affidavit of Lust Shock for when one’s glam online paramour turns out to be a spotty wretch from Leeds, UT, and not Leeds, UK?
Leeds, UK is not glam. Trust me.
In the sense that foreign = exotic was my meaning.
A Capulet from the hills of Kentucky might have an equally exotic g;lam factor to a UK Montague; and as equally dashed if said Capulet was a git from Kent.
“Teen Dating Contract”
…this has ’80s Movie written all over it.
“The Dater shall not stand with a boombox under the date-ee’s window else s/he forfeit all dating privileges.”
If dater #1 has fulfilled the terms of the 1st date contract dater #1 will provide dater #2 1 kiss at end of date. Dater #2 has final say if kiss will include tongue. Express oral permission must be given by dater #2 if dater #1 wishes the kiss to turn into a full make-out session. If either dater wishes to progress to 2nd base both daters must sign a witnessed & notarized amendment to initial dating contract.
That’s a lot of work just to get laid.
You have NO idea!
Extend Performance Date –
Oh….This is the contract I needed for Mr. X. Doh!
see:
Turns out I just so happen to need all of these contracts (I’m a very busy guy), but I don’t have over $2000. I do have this slightly worn $20 with a doodle drawn on Jackson’s forehead of what looks like gorillas using a catapult to fling poo at zoo visitors during a gentle rainstorm that I’ll trade you for the document titled “How to Write a Contract” in your list above. That should take care of all of my needs.
Thanks.
To those considering the ‘contract for early withdrawal’
maybe you should try the ‘mutual release’ contract instead.
Or maybe a bachelor on the prowl should get a couple of copies of ‘Release and Hold Harmless Agreement’.
And as a kid I would have purchased a ‘Bullying Contract’.
“Party of the first part Tommy Toughguy hereafter known as the ‘bully’ shall agree to only dispense beatings to the party of the second part Gary Shrimpster hereafter known as the ‘victim’ if the victim doesn’t cough up his lunch money promptly when confronted in the hallway. Said beating by the bully shall cease upon loss of consciousness of the vitctim…”
jg, you should be happy to know that in exchange for making the comment that reminded you of that show, I now get to punch my own card. Punchity Punch Punch! And no, that’s not what the kids are calling it these days. Is it?
Good Morning, Legal Begals!