2009 January 28


Straight from the back roads of Vermont. 30″ sq.
Great novelty item for garage or basement!

Pick up only.

If interested please email.


Is this like one of those 3-D things where you have to stand the right distance away and cross your eyes before you see the hidden image of Elvis? And is it the thin, pre-war Elvis or the old, bloated Elvis? That makes a big difference.

Man, I can never get those things right. All I see is a cow.

Edited to add: Oh wait, I get it now!


Thanks, Candace — that made it perfectly clear!

38 Responses leave one →
  1. 2009 January 28
    jeff permalink

    You’ve never heard of Elvis the Cow? She is famous for walking the back roads of Vermont. Many a weary traveler has been revived by the milk provided by Elvis. The Alps have their St. Bernard’s, Vermont has Elvis.

    Adores: 3
  2. 2009 January 28
    Are you ok? permalink

    The sign is of an Elvis impersonator cow. Like most Elvis impersonators, it bears no resemblance to the actual Elvis.

    Adores: 2
  3. 2009 January 28
    drmk permalink

    It gives “Love Me Tender” a whole new backstory.

    Adores: 8
  4. 2009 January 28
    spamhead permalink

    All I see is a bull with an udder. And I’m very very confused.

    Adores: 0
  5. 2009 January 28
    spamhead permalink

    Unless comment #2 is correct and those aren’t horns, just a big pompadour.

    Adores: 1
    • 2012 March 4
      CapnMac permalink

      [bovine corey (from future)]
      Both sexes of “cows” generally have horns.

      Female bovines destined for dairy farms have the horns removed (or cut short) to make it simpler/safer for the handling and feeding of the stock inside barns or in the milking parlour.

      Male bovines bound for the butcher (beaves) generally are grass/pasture fed, and have less need for horn amputation. As most of that stock is also castrated, they generally have less aggression, so the horns are less of an issue in that way, too.

      “Cows” is the common collective for all bovines.
      “Heifers” are female bovines, typically breed stock in the beef industry.
      “Steer” is a castrated bull raised for beef production.
      “Beave” is the collective for bovines for meat production. Often used to refer to ‘wild’–non-castrated–stock.
      “Oxen” are bovine stock used as dray–driving–stock.
      “Dogie” (alt “Doagie”; pr, “dough GEE” or “dhaw GEE”) are all calves after weaning.

      Now, to go wandering after the rambling tumbleweed, yi’yi’yi’yay. . .

      Adores: 0
      • 2012 March 4
        One Moving Violation permalink

        That’s yippy aye ay cow pattie.

        Adores: 0
      • 2012 March 12
        Emor permalink

        “Heifers” are female cows who have not yet given birth to offspring. After their first calf is born, they’re just “cows”.
        “Dogie” is a regionalism; other terms for this phase of a domestic bovine’s life include “stirk”.

        Adores: 1
  6. 2009 January 28
    candace permalink

    Either the cow is ‘horny’, or it’s really Elvis in disguise:


    Adores: 0
  7. 2009 January 28
    Courtney permalink

    I thought the cow’s name was El*SIE* – or is that the cow that knocked over Old Lady Leary’s Lantern? Either way it’ll be a hot time in the old town tonight… the old, remote, Vermontian town.

    Adores: 1
  8. 2009 January 28

    …And this is $119 because?

    Adores: 0
  9. 2009 January 28
    Kristen permalink

    Doesn’t this mean that someone in rural VT is speeding down a backroad not knowing he’s about to run into a cow? Generally road signs aren’t just free for the taking to sell on CL.

    Adores: 4
    • 2012 March 4
      CapnMac permalink

      In most states it’s illegal to trade in “official” signs, if only for trading in “ill gotten goods” in that such signs are seldom removed with the permission of the “owners.”

      Also, such signs often are placed if there are more than some number (three in many states) of animal collisions at the same location in one calendar year.

      This is also why one might see a “deer crossing” sign in only one direction, too–one side of the road might have better visibility of cerf traversing the Right of Way.
      [/dot corey]

      Adores: 0
  10. 2009 January 28
    Tir permalink

    Shouldn’t this be filed under “Receipt of Stolen Goods”? For $119 I think that’s just a misdemeanor…

    Adores: 2
  11. 2009 January 28
    Kris permalink

    Yeah, how does this animal have both horns and an udder? I’ve been to Vermont and have never seen these together. At least it’s not $120, that would be way too expensive for something like this.

    Adores: 1
  12. 2009 January 29
    jeff permalink

    Some cows have horns

    Adores: 1
  13. 2009 January 30
    D / DM permalink

    Jeff is right… Some, actually, a lot, of cows have horns. They’re not as big as bulls’ horns.

    Think it’s possible that this is really a novelty sign and not a real road sign?

    Adores: 0
  14. 2009 January 30
    drmk permalink

    I think we’re missing the point here. What does a cow, with or without horns and/or udders, HAVE TO DO WITH ELVIS? I mean, before Candace made it into a fabulous spangly fat old Cow Elvis, that is.

    Adores: 0
  15. 2009 January 31
    D / DM permalink


    I think #5 might have it right. Maybe the poster looked at the cow and said, “It has a pompadour, like Elvis! That’s awesome! I can sell it on Craigslist!”

    Adores: 2
  16. 2009 May 1
    selvig permalink

    I think comment #10 is right.

    Road signs are not for the taking.

    Adores: 1
  17. 2009 May 18
    Vladimir permalink

    “Elvis” is the yellow negative space between the cow’s legs. It looks like The King’s profile (looking up), incl. pompadour.

    Adores: 1
    • 2012 March 4

      I see Abraham Lincoln. Or maybe a herd of beautiful wild ponies running free across the plains.

      Adores: 2
    • 2012 March 4
      One Moving Violation permalink

      I think it looks like standard pattern #8 of the rorchach series to test excessive compulsiveness.

      *everybody glares at OMV*

      Ok, it’s a cow.

      Adores: 3
  18. 2012 March 4

    Elvis Cow Road Sign is my chain of country-western-themed eateries in strip malls.

    Adores: 4
  19. 2012 March 4

    I don’t need a “cow” sign for my basement, but I could use a “tsunami evacuation route” sign for my bathroom…

    Adores: 6
    • 2012 March 4
      One Moving Violation permalink

      Hey professor? What’s a tsunami?

      Adores: 1
      • 2012 March 4

        I think it was a Johnny Cash song…”A boy named Tsunami.”

        Adores: 2
  20. 2012 March 4

    *takes a deep breath*

    You ain’t nothing but a herd cow!
    Moo’in’ all the time!
    You ain’t nothing but a bovine!
    Chewin’ all the time!
    I ain’t ever gonna milk you,
    your dairy ain’t no drink of mine!

    They said you was an Angus
    But that was just a lie.
    They said you was a Grade A
    But that was just a lie.
    I ain’t never gonna grill you,
    and you ain’t no meal of mine!

    Thank you… thank you very much…

    Adores: 11
  21. 2012 March 4

    *consults menu* I’ll have the “Hunk a-hunk o’ Burning Cow.”

    Adores: 9
  22. 2012 March 4

    This cow doesn’t strike me as having that much of a resemblance to Elvis Costello at all…

    Adores: 2
    • 2012 March 4

      What about Elvis Cowstello?

      That may have to be my Halloween costume this year.

      Adores: 3
  23. 2012 March 4
    CapnMac permalink

    Hmm, [logic gears grinding]

    Paul Bunyon’s Ox was named “Blue”*

    Oxen are “cows” (in the general sense).

    Suede is a form of tanned cowhide.

    Blue’s suede could have been made into shoes**.

    Carl Perkins sold a song about shoes.


    Elvis, QED.
    [/i gots lawgik corey]

    *Which probably meant that the Ox in question was a recessive Roan color, there being an old habit of nicknaming things to the opposite of what they are. If one re-reads PB stories and visualizes the ox as a “ginger” the tales make much more sense (especially the biting).

    **The color of the bovine has almost nothing to do with the final color of the tanned leather, which is almost always the result of dying.

    Adores: 0
    • 2012 March 4
      One Moving Violation permalink

      Yes, well it would be torturous to tan them while they’re still alive.
      We reserve that for children.

      Adores: 0
    • 2012 March 5
      Windrose permalink

      I hate to correct you, Capn, but the ox’s name was Babe. He was, in fact, blue. 20 points from Gryffindor!

      Adores: 1
  24. 2012 March 5
    penguin permalink

    Needs more cowbell.

    Adores: 0
  25. 2012 March 5

    So, valarie and P-Rex, hope the barbecue was to your tastes! Punchity Punch Punch!

    Good Morning, Jersey!

    Adores: 0

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