YSaC, Vol. 523: Chuck Close the window.

2009 December 22

Art Deco Painting on Canvas — $50


Brand new. See Pix.
Art Deco Painting on Canvas $50
Brand new. See Pix. Sa VaBien.

Asking $50
CASH ONLY.
Must be able to pick up.
520

I’m no art snob, but I know what I like, and I love this. There’s a sophisticated interplay between light and shadow. The metal elements provide a postmodernist commentary on the relationship of mankind to the development of industrial society. The splash of color in the lower right hand corner reminds us of the human element. The ambiguity of the direction of the flow of the tubing causes the viewer to pause and reflect; is this an intake, limiting our access to the outside world, or is this expelling our waste, and thus our existence, and causing the further collapse of the boundaries between in and out, right and wrong, animal and mineral?

The labeling of this as an Art Deco work is a masterful stroke of irony on the part of the creator of this clearly photorealistic work; it conjures up images of the ostentatious and gilded era of design and defeats them via its linearity and simplicity. Mechanism wins over opulence; machine wins over mankind.

Or maybe it’s just the wrong picture.

Thanks, Andrea!

109 Responses leave one →
  1. 2009 December 22
    86reliant permalink

    First! Bah, I hate that fad.

    What a masterful post. Breaking down all barriers of sarcasm and irony,couched in language that a fresh-out-of-college art snob would let fly over their head. Good stuff!

    Adores: 9
    • 2009 December 22
      Windrose permalink

      Ahem. We don’t do that fad here. But if we did, I would have to point out that you only beat me by a millisecond. If that. 8p

      Adores: 3
    • 2009 December 22
      lost_compass permalink

      Agreed, masterful and incisive commentary, though I’m surprised you didn’t mention the obvious influence of Canaletto, Veronese, et al – the blind Venetian school.

      Adores: 26
      • 2009 December 22
        GrahamT permalink

        Blind Venetian… nice.

        Adores: 4
    • 2009 December 22
      Colleen in MA permalink

      drmk – somehow I get the impression that spending a few hours with you in a museum would be a great time. Sign me up!

      Adores: 6
      • 2009 December 22
        Cled permalink

        …or in a construction and plumbing supplies shop.

        Adores: 12
        • 2009 December 22
          Lola permalink

          Anywhere, really. Especially if alcohol is involved. Pity I can’t make the YS@C holiday get together. I’ll be on the right coast, for once, but still way too far north.

          Adores: 1
    • 2009 December 22
      develish1 permalink

      agreed, this is one of your best drmk.

      by the way oh Llamanun, why I am getting a message saying “slow down you posted too quickly on my FIRST post of the day?

      Adores: 1
      • 2009 December 22

        Not a clue! But I’ll look into it.

        Adores: 1
        • 2009 December 22
          develish1 permalink

          thanks, Lola was getting the same thing yesterday, and it seems she still is.

          Adores: 1
        • 2009 December 22
          Lola permalink

          I cleared the cache and everything. *shrugs* Don’t worry about it too much, though – if you can’t figure it out/fix it, I’ll deal.

          Adores: 1
  2. 2009 December 22
    Windrose permalink

    This might be one of those masterpieces you have to appreciate in person. It’s just not saying anything to me this way. Even if I close one eye and hold my breath. Nope, nothing.

    Adores: 2
  3. 2009 December 22

    I prefer a brand new painting. I bought a used one once and had nothing but trouble. The frame cracked, the hanging wire frayed; it was in the shop all the time. I finally just put it out on the street in a bad neighborhood and let it get stolen so I could collect the insurance.

    Adores: 12
    • 2009 December 22
      tacomagic permalink

      You have just beaten me at my own game. I tip my hat to you.

      Adores: 2
  4. 2009 December 22
    tacomagic permalink

    There is but one line of this post that truely puzzles me:

    “Brand new”

    Since when has this been a selling point of paintings?

    Adores: 2
  5. 2009 December 22
    judybat permalink

    Is Sa VaBien the artist? I hear he/she is very good, but likes to fake French masterpieces.

    Adores: 2
    • 2009 December 22

      Ah, I love that song. Brings back such memories:

      Ca (Sa) Va Bien as sung by Maurice Chevalier

      Ca Va Bien
      Ca Va Bien
      When they ask me how I am
      Ca Va Bien

      My art’s brand new
      Art Deco too
      Looks like a vent
      How’s my accent?
      Ca Va Bien
      Ca Va Bien
      Ca Va Bien
      (do do do do)

      Adores: 19
    • 2009 December 22
      MrWhite permalink

      It does have a certain something. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but it does remind me some other artist… maybe Jean Nesaisquoi.

      Adores: 21
      • 2009 December 22
        sarajean80 permalink

        I think the splash of red at the bottom is a homage to Ennui’s Scarlet Period. It has that same burning angst against the industrialization of society.

        Adores: 6
        • 2009 December 22
          ed snyder permalink

          “Scarlet period”

          Gross! Intriguing band name, though.

          Adores: 6
        • 2009 December 22

          I think you mean “Scarlet Other Seven Dwarves,” Ed.

          Adores: 1
      • 2009 December 22
        Ed Snyder permalink

        “A certain something”

        The French call that Juhnuh say kwa.

        Adores: 2
    • 2009 December 22
      Lola permalink

      Wasn’t there a scandal a few years go with Sa VaBien’s paintings “murky buckup” and “seafood plate”? All of the first year French students thought they were great, but the natives gave them nothing but side-eye.

      Adores: 7
      • 2009 December 22
        Ed Snyder permalink

        This is a perfect opportunity for you to practice making cedille(s).

        Adores: 2
        • 2009 December 22

          I found a box of them in my desk and I’m willing to share.

          ÇÇÇÇÇÇÇÇ

          Adores: 2
        • 2009 December 22
          Lola permalink

          Ed, that would work were I at home. I can’t remember the PC/non-Mac instructions.

          Adores: 2
        • 2009 December 22
          develish1 permalink

          Alt 135 for lower case, 128 for upper case

          Adores: 1
  6. 2009 December 22

    Personally, I love it that this seller requires not only $50 but some housework.

    Must be able to pick up. Go pick up the living room!

    Adores: 6
    • 2009 December 22
      Ed Snyder permalink

      Maybe the other end of the hose is attached to a Shop-Vac which exhausts outside of the window. Periodically, the owner is required to go outside and pick up all the crap outside his home.

      Adores: 3
      • 2009 December 22
        Lola permalink

        That would explain some yards I’ve seen …

        Adores: 1
    • 2009 December 22
      Ed Snyder permalink

      Oh yeah, something about monkeys, too.

      Adores: 7
      • 2009 December 22
        Rathy permalink

        In Soviet Russia, Monkeys something about you!

        Adores: 11
  7. 2009 December 22
    ToBScholarly permalink

    Okay, getting beyond the ad and what it is supposed to be, can someone tell me what exactly that IS a picture of? Dryer vent? Part of an HVAC system? And why would you have a picture of it at all?

    Adores: 1
    • 2009 December 22

      Because it’s totally AWESOME, that’s why!

      Adores: 2
    • 2009 December 22
      Ed Snyder permalink

      I think it’s a portable air conditioner that vents to the outside via a window. Slightly less probably, it could be an environmentalist trying to vaccuum the air of his city to purify it with the HEPA filtration of his Hoover.

      Adores: 3
      • 2009 December 22
        Windrose permalink

        *giggle* You said Hoover!

        Adores: 1
        • 2009 December 22
          Lola permalink

          Windrose, whenever you do one of your *giggle* comments, for some reason I imagine that it’s your avatar bird saying it. No, I don’t know why, but it’s even funnier that way. :)

          Yes, I should probably get out more …

          Adores: 2
        • 2009 December 23
          Windrose permalink

          I can see it, she does look like she’s giggling. Unfortunately she only barks and says bye-bye when I pick up the phone. Our visiting lorikeet (related, apparently to the Chattering Lorys) does giggle. She is something else.

          Adores: 0
  8. 2009 December 22

    Maybe it’s just a very photorealistic painting. I mean, come on. How does that not remind you of the Chrysler Building?

    Adores: 3
  9. 2009 December 22

    Missed the “Chuck Close” reference. Lovely, drmk.

    Adores: 2
    • 2009 December 22

      So glad someone got that. I was very proud of that one.

      Adores: 3
    • 2009 December 22
      sarajean80 permalink

      Very well done :)

      Adores: 1
  10. 2009 December 22
    mudslicker permalink

    It could only be more beautiful if it was painted on black velvet by Thomas Kinkade.

    But it’s definitely not art deco.

    Adores: 6
    • 2009 December 22
      tacomagic permalink

      Sa VaBien’s later “Industrial Waste” period of still lifes were much better for rounding out the Post Modern Cubism that many new age art Deco projects tend to favor. Particularly the pre-apocalyptic fall of modern society angle that tends to pervade the neo-impressionistic buildings we see everywhere* today.

      *Septic treatment fascilities.

      Adores: 2
  11. 2009 December 22
    PrincessLuceval permalink

    Art Deco? More like Part Duct-o.

    Adores: 25
    • 2009 December 22
      develish1 permalink

      nice one Princess, I’d +1 it if I could be it wont let me again.

      and yes drmk I’ve cleared my cache, it made no difference. I’m also getting that annoying “posting to fast” on every post today, just like Lola was or perhaps still is.

      Adores: 1
      • 2009 December 22
        mudslicker permalink

        I’m having that problem [the inability to +1] as well. It started yesterday. Very random as only a few posts are like that.

        Adores: 1
        • 2009 December 22
          ToBScholarly permalink

          I will +1 for everyone. Consider it my Christmas gift to YSaC.

          Because I am cheap like that.

          Adores: 5
        • 2009 December 22
          Lola permalink

          Cheap? I prefer “economically minded.”

          Adores: 2
        • 2009 December 22
          Jen permalink

          No no, it’s “recession chic” and it’s sooo May 09. Though come 2010, it’ll be retro, or at least ironic, and thus back in fashion.

          Adores: 2
        • 2009 December 22
          Lola permalink

          Jen, no matter what screen I am on or how close or far I peer, I can’t, for the life of me, figure out what your avatar is. I’ve begun to suspect it’s one of those pictures that looks one thing viewed one way, and something else another. Or it’s a Rohrsach-like psych test.

          Adores: 0
        • 2009 December 22
          develish1 permalink

          thanks heavens for that Lola, I thought it was just me needing new glasses.

          Adores: 0
        • 2009 December 22

          Is it burning man? I mean “Burning Man”, not “Hey, is it burning, man?”

          Adores: 0
        • 2009 December 22
          Lola permalink

          I thought that could be it, or a picture from Burning Man, the festival. Or the part in “The Wizard of Oz” when the witch sets the Scarecrow on fire.
          Or it could be puppies and kittens dressed up for Halloween, and the murk from my mind’s recesses has me permanently seeing things that are dark, disturbing, and only in my head.

          Adores: 1
        • 2009 December 22

          Oooh, I love it when the Scarecrow catches on fire!!! Doesn’t the Cowardly Tiger put him out?

          Adores: 5
        • 2009 December 22
          Jen permalink

          Naw, never been to Burning Man on account of it’s in a different hemisphere to me…

          It’s from a winter solstice festival I went to – they had all these ‘fire sculptures’ (average looking constructions designed to be seen through FLAMES and DESTRUCTION) and the one in the pic was three people climbing a staircase-like structure, which, when set on fire, looked very “Heironymus Bosch takes acid, curls up into fetal position”. I liked, I shot, I avatar’d.

          Huh, wiki-ing to verify spelling of Heironymus Bosch reveals that there is a band by that name in my fair country, and that I know one of the members. Tiny country win!!

          Adores: 4
        • 2009 December 22
          Lola permalink

          OK, that’s cool. It is a burning, man-type figure, if not “Burning Man” (either sort, take your pick). That’s what I thought I was seeing, but not sure.
          Sounds like a really interesting event!

          Adores: 0
  12. 2009 December 22

    Propping genuine art-deco artwork atop the exhaust port to his HEPA-filtration system, the art aficianado/OCD germophobe attempts to capture the perfect light to showcase the amazing painting.

    Just as the shutter clicks, our poor hero’s art-deco masterpiece falls to the floor, glass and frame shattering in a million little pieces; shredding his masterpiece in the process.

    Holding his head in his hands, he rocks back and forth on his heels and cries – “Oh the tragedy, the humanity! Why? In God’s name, why??”

    Thinking quickly, because he does still need that $50, he decides to go ahead and post whatever picture he got on craig’s, and hopes no one will notice his listing is missing its most important element.

    Or, maybe, the dog was playing with the camera and this is what we got.

    Adores: 10
  13. 2009 December 22
    Ed Snyder permalink

    Waitaminut, I figured it out! It’s Bender implementing one of his classic burglary techniques.

    Adores: 7
    • 2009 December 22

      I guess the painting was pending for a bending!

      Adores: 3
    • 2009 December 22
      GrahamT permalink

      There must be a beer attached to the other end of that arm.

      Adores: 2
      • 2009 December 22
        Ed Snyder permalink

        I used to watch Futurama all the time with my 3-year-old until he told some girl at the park to “bite my shiny metal ass.” Now we don’t watch it anymore. Sad, really.

        Adores: 8
        • 2009 December 22
          sarajean80 permalink

          I’m sad for you. It’s a terrific show, I’ve got everything (shows and movies) on DVD and never fail to laugh even though I know almost every show by heart.

          Adores: 1
        • 2009 December 22

          That sounds like the most awesome 3 year old ever.

          This is probably why I don’t have children…..

          Adores: 1
        • 2009 December 22
          Lola permalink

          I have no children, and, as a single-adult only child, no nieces or nephews. I have two godchildren, who are brother and sister to each other, and while their parents are pretty cool in some ways (I can totally see them letting the kids watch Futurama until they are old enough to quote it) I still have to restrain myself from getting them certain presents. E.g., the kids’ shirt from Glarkware that reads “Dingo Snack.” (The Clash and Ramones onesies were fine, though.)

          Adores: 2
        • 2009 December 22
          GrahamT permalink

          LMAO… well maybe when he’s older…

          Adores: 1
        • 2009 December 22
          Windrose permalink

          I don’t understand. What girl wouldn’t love an invitation like that?

          Adores: 0
  14. 2009 December 22
    GrahamT permalink

    I believe this is called “steampunk” art.

    Adores: 2
  15. 2009 December 22

    Maybe “See Pix” does not refer to the picture at the bottom of the post but to someone named Pix whom you must see in order to see the Art Deco painting. Or maybe the poster is an idiot who can’t tell the difference between a picture of a window with a portable air conditioning unit and a a picture of an Art Deco painting. Personally, I believe it is the latter.

    Adores: 2
    • 2009 December 22

      Darn it all to heck, I have an extra a in that post and I didn’t notice until it was far too late to edit. I guess that is my punishment for trying to post here while simultaneously eating breakfast and flirting by e-mail.

      Adores: 3
      • 2009 December 22
        Addicted Reader permalink

        I didn’t notice until you pointed it out. Then I went back and looked closely and found it.

        Sometimes owning up to your mistakes is good, saves you being teased.

        But sometimes, it just makes things worse. ; )

        Adores: 1
      • 2009 December 22
        Ed Snyder permalink

        Careful with that flirting by email stuff. That’s how I met my wife.

        Adores: 2
        • 2009 December 22
          Lola permalink

          I met one of my exes that way; at the same time, he was resultantly becoming someone else’s ex.
          I don’t flirt by email any more.

          Adores: 3
        • 2009 December 22
          Bianchi Sound permalink

          That’s funny, that’s how I met your wife, too.

          Adores: 18
        • 2009 December 22
          tacomagic permalink

          I met my stalker that way, actually. Nice gal too, always sends me a fresh pig heart for Christmas.

          Adores: 10
  16. 2009 December 22
    Addicted Reader permalink

    Since I think everything there is to be said about the picture has been said (and I don’t know enough about art to come w/ any good BS anyway), I’m going to comment on the text of the ad.

    Especially the fact that it is repeated.

    This is obviously one of those people who believes that if someone can’t understand him the first time, repeating himself more slowly and loudly will obviously solve the problem.

    ART DECO PAINTING ON CANVAS!!!!

    Adores: 1
    • 2009 December 22
      Lola permalink

      Clearly, a recent customer of ROOFER ROOFER ROOFER ROOFER!!!!

      Adores: 9
  17. 2009 December 22
    Mimi permalink

    I’m not nearly art savvy/snobby enough to post intelligently on this one. And one of my clients just gave me some Lindor Truffles and I’m on too much of a chocolate high to even be snarky (’tis a pitty.) So I’ll just sit here and hum Christmas Carols until tomorrow’s post and hope it brings the snark back.

    Adores: 1
    • 2009 December 22
      Ed Snyder permalink

      I recommend Clonodine to suppress the inevitable Lindor withdrawal symptoms.

      Adores: 0
      • 2009 December 22
        Mimi permalink

        Only if I can use the Catapres-TTS patch to get my dose of Clonidine*. I don’t think I could stuff anything more down my gullet at the moment. *pats fat belly*

        *May 7 years of pharmacy tech experience would NOT let me avoid pointing out the spelling correction.

        Adores: 0
        • 2009 December 22
          Ed Snyder permalink

          I’m gonna claim typo since the “o” and “i” are adjacent. I’ll leave it to the reader to decide if I’m lying.

          Adores: 4
        • 2009 December 22
          Mimi permalink

          ooh spelling nazi fail on my part >.< That should read My* instead of May. You are totally off the hook Ed.

          Adores: 0
    • 2009 December 22

      You could just go without caffeine for a few days. You’ll even walk sarcastically. Of course, you do run the risk of murdering a bunch of people, too….

      Adores: 4
      • 2009 December 22
        Mimi permalink

        What a horrifying thought Stephanie. I’m not a coffee drinker, but when I go more than about 18 hours without a pop (or coke, or soda, or cola or whatever you call it where you are) I become unbearable to be around. Just as you feared, I think I would shoot way past the Land of Snarkiness and end up in the Kingdom of Homicidal Tendencies.

        Adores: 4
        • 2012 February 20
          Not-a-[censored] Lion permalink

          [matt] It’s soda pop. SODA POP! [/matt]

          Adores: 0
  18. 2009 December 22
    Depressy permalink

    How about a nice mug of Clonidine?

    Adores: 0
    • 2009 December 22

      Laced with Lindors?

      Adores: 0
    • 2009 December 22
      Mimi permalink

      Liquid Clonidine in a Depressy the Clown mug… Now that is an interesting idea. Either it would totally cure me of all addictions and I’d never need to take a drug* again for the rest of my life, or I would spiral into the Abyss of Despair and have waking nightmares of sad-faced clown mugs chase me ’til the end of time.

      *Caffeine is my only addiction, thank goodness.

      Adores: 2
    • 2009 December 22
      FireManSteve-O permalink

      I’d prefer if I could find my bottle of Thorazine* instead. Maybe I could find some snarky post inspiration.

      *Just for you Lola.

      Adores: 0
      • 2009 December 22
        Lola permalink

        Thorazine! Though I’m more of a Darvon girl, myself. (Not for ages, but it did the job when needed.)

        Adores: 0
  19. 2009 December 22

    Just left office xmas lunch party!!11 Yeah, drunk postingQ!Q!! I love YSAC, sniff sniff, so snarky, so smarty so so so I just love you gusy, mery merry xmas to all!

    Adores: 3
    • 2009 December 22
      develish1 permalink

      and next comes the hamburgers, right?

      Adores: 3
    • 2009 December 22
      tacomagic permalink

      Yeah, but will you still respect us all in the morning.

      Adores: 2
  20. 2009 December 22
    queensbee permalink

    well, it COULD be just you because that sure looks like the chrysler bldg, on its side and disguised as a dryer vent. but i could be wrong. where are my glasses?

    Adores: 0
  21. 2009 December 22
    Windrose permalink

    Isaac and Sarajean, please come to the office to have your cards punched. One at a time!

    Adores: 0
    • 2009 December 22

      Can I also get a retroactive punch for my first comment-of-the-day, a couple of months back?

      Adores: 0
      • 2009 December 23
        Windrose permalink

        If you can get a confirmation from The Ostrimu or the Lamanun.

        Adores: 0
        • 2009 December 23

          Sure, why not?

          Adores: 0
    • 2009 December 23
      sarajean80 permalink

      Thanks Windrose :)

      Adores: 0
  22. 2009 December 22
    Lola permalink

    We be spammin’!
    Hey, even though this claims to be a Canadian site, when it tried to set a cookie on my FF, it was a .ru site. That’s troll spam on a bed of maple leaves with a side of borscht!

    … fail …

    Adores: 0
    • 2009 December 23

      In Soviet Russia, messageboard spam posts phishing scammers!

      Adores: 1
  23. 2009 December 23
    Windrose permalink

    No songs or poems today. I am feeling unfulfilled in a vague, Art Deco way.

    Adores: 0
  24. 2009 December 23
    Windrose permalink

    If I post a bunch of short sentences, will I get that message about slowing down?

    Adores: 0
  25. 2009 December 23
    Windrose permalink

    Will you all start subtracting points from my comments?

    Adores: 1
  26. 2009 December 23
    Windrose permalink

    Will I be banned and never punch another card again?

    Adores: 0
  27. 2009 December 23
    Windrose permalink

    You are posting comments too quickly. Slow down. Hooray! It worked!

    Adores: 1
  28. 2009 December 23
    Windrose permalink

    “change the mind, the multithousand army of your readers will not understand you, it will not forgive!”

    Wow, international spam!

    Adores: 0
  29. 2009 December 23
    sarajean80 permalink

    Can I have “WTF” for $300, Alex?

    Adores: 0
  30. 2010 November 18

    plumbing supplies should always come from reputable suppliers so always check their backgrounds “~.

    Adores: 0

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