YSaC, Vol. 525: Have a spiny, briny Christmas …

2009 December 24

In case you’re still frantically looking for a Christmas present for that special someone:

Christmas Hedgehogs


i have like 7 young under 6 months old hedgies that needs new homes before the 20th’ i am leaving town to visit my family, and have to get rid of most of my kids, before i leave, if i could i would keep them all, that was my main plan, but i have to rehome them because i got to have some cash to make it back home, and to get a few gifts for my sisters kids.. if it wasnt for me having no choice i wouldnt let them go, i want then to go to a good home, please know how to care for them, if not i could show/tell you in 10 mins, there really simple.. no noise, no smell, the eat kitten food, and already litter trained..i paid 250 each plus shiping for the adults, but i am letting them go for 100 each for anyone you want, i just want them to find good forever homes, they would make a great christmas gift for someone, =)
i have male and female, with many colors..
PLEASE CALL ME BECAUSE I WILL NOT BE AROUND THE COMP A LOT..
xxx.xxx.xxxx
THANK YOU

Christmas Hedgehogs was the little-known sequel to Year Without a Santa Claus. In it, the main character, Spiny, has to convince Santa that boys and girls around the world believe in him. He does this by stealing all of the periods from all of the sentences. Not surprisingly, this doesn’t work, as now Santa can’t understand a damned thing anyone is saying. Heat Miser and Cold Miser make a guest appearance, singing their showstopping number, “I Have to Get Rid of Most of My Kids, Before I Leave.” Santa realizes that hedgehogs are the true spirit of Christmas, and decides to retire and make Spiny into the new symbol of Christmas.

You can blame/thank sarajean80 for this one. Now get off the computer and go spend time with your family.

81 Responses leave one →
  1. 2009 December 24

    I’m all snarkless today, because it’s Christmas Eve and baby hedgehogs are incredibly cute creatures.

    (If you don’t already know that, do a quick image search.)

    Also, here’s a three-part poem I wrote a while back, with some hedgehogs in it.

    Adores: 4
    • 2009 December 24
      JuneJenny permalink

      A man who writes poems about hedgehogs? My heart’s all aflutter.

      Adores: 1
      • 2009 December 24

        I’ll even read it to you if you follow that link. Since it’s an online-only magazine, Unsplendid asks its contributors to record audio of the poems they publish there.

        Adores: 1
        • 2009 December 24
          mudslicker permalink

          Have ya got one about Bush babies?

          Hehe..awesome poem isaac. The Queen of Hearts, she had more than some tarts, eh?

          Have a great Winter Break Sir Monkness!

          Adores: 2
  2. 2009 December 24

    In fact, here’s a link to that image search I mentioned.

    Warning: Intense cuteness behind that link.

    Adores: 1
    • 2009 December 24
      Mimi permalink

      Awwww, the poor little babies with their teeny-weeny legs in casts. It made me want to take them all home! But the original post cause no such motherly instincts in me. Do hedgehogs really cost $100-$250?? As I only adopt pets from shelters maybe I don’t have a reliable yardstick to measure pet prices.

      Adores: 2
    • 2009 December 24
      tacomagic permalink

      I think that might have been the closest I ever came to squeeing.

      Adores: 7
    • 2009 December 24
      Cled permalink

      Oh no! Will I have to replace my baby marmoset with a baby hedgehog now?

      Terminal cuteness.

      Adores: 3
  3. 2009 December 24
    Lilly permalink

    I was very confused about this one, until I realised they were talking about actual living hedgehogs and not the chocolate type.
    http://www.purdys.com/Christmas-Hedgehogs-P203.aspx

    Adores: 3
  4. 2009 December 24

    If only all kids were so easy to sell…. no, sorry, I mean rehome.

    Happy holidays, everyone.

    Adores: 11
  5. 2009 December 24
    tacomagic permalink

    Many colors of hedgehog for sale… er rehoming.

    If there is a blue one I’ll totally dish out the $100 price… er rehoming… fee.

    Adores: 4
    • 2009 December 24
      Meredith permalink

      I’d like glitter on mine, please.

      I’m pretty in love with hedgehogs, and have been since I was little and read Beatrix Potter books. I’ve always wanted one.

      Adores: 4
      • 2009 December 24
        sarajean80 permalink

        I’d like one that’s purple with red tips. That would be both cute and bad-ass.

        My sister had an albino one, it was adorable. She got rid of it though; it had babies and then ate them, which made her somehow a little less cute to my sister.

        Adores: 6
        • 2009 December 24
          tacomagic permalink

          Yeah, most rodents you have to watch out for that. Most of the time it’s best to rear the babies of rodentia yourself or keep the mother extremely well fed. It’s even worse for the ones that were raised by people because their instincts get all screwed up.

          Adores: 2
  6. 2009 December 24
    Addicted Reader permalink

    Referring to them has his/her “kids” weirded me out a bit. More so that the rest of the ad, even.

    Adores: 3
    • 2009 December 24
      tacomagic permalink

      I wasn’t even going to go there. Either “hedgehogs” is an innuendo for her actual children, or we are looking at crazy cat lady syndrome here.

      In either case, selling her children to others so she can afford to take a trip is just… I mean… no.

      Most likely though this is a thinly veiled ploy designed to convince people not to report her for selling animals with a pethetic sob story.

      Then again even if it was true I still report her. Because I’m a mean little piece of work.

      Adores: 11
  7. 2009 December 24
    Apex permalink

    I got a hedgehog for Christmas one year. It was awesome (seriously).

    Adores: 4
  8. 2009 December 24
    InsideJoke permalink

    In Soviet Russia, hedgehog rehome you for Christmas.

    Uh. . . how was that?

    Adores: 15
    • 2009 December 24
      tacomagic permalink

      In Soviet Russia, kids get rid of You!

      Adores: 5
      • 2009 December 24
        Addicted Reader permalink

        Insanity is hereditary – you get it from your kids.

        (I forget the original attribution. It was(/still is, I guess,) a favorite (mis?)quotation of my mother’s.)

        (Mmm, nested parentheses. : ) )

        Adores: 3
        • 2009 December 24
          Rathy permalink

          Be careful with that, Addicted…

          http://xkcd.com/541/

          Adores: 2
        • 2009 December 27
          Lola permalink

          My mother quoted that too. Perhaps it’s just wisdom that occurs to you whilst parenting.

          (I’m a huge fan of parenthesis (always have been) ; I’m just retentive enough that I even like using them properly in boolean searching. Yes, I’m weird, but I managed to get a job that rewards skills such as that …)

          Adores: 3
  9. 2009 December 24

    One question, and perhaps I am being too logical about this, if the hedgehogs make such great gifts, why is the poster not giving them to his/her sister’s kids?

    Adores: 9
    • 2009 December 24
      GrahamT permalink

      Perhaps there’s some FAA regulation about transporting hedgehogs on an airplane… I mean, Sonic could bust through walls with his spines so I imagine that might be a concern on an aircraft.

      Adores: 16
      • 2009 December 24
        Cled permalink

        I mean, Sonic could bust through walls with his spines so I imagine that might be a concern on an aircraft.

        Ya think?

        Adores: 1
    • 2009 December 24
      Windrose permalink

      Kelli, some very odd states have laws against owning anything cute. For instance, Californians cannot own Quaker parakeets, ferrets, or hedgehogs legally.

      As a side note, I wish you could all smell my hands right now. I just finished the white wine, thyme, rosemary, garlic, oj, and black pepper marinade for the leg of lamb. It’s FAB-ulous!

      Adores: 3
      • 2009 December 25
        FireManSteve-O permalink

        I think Chinchillas are illegal in some major cities. Or maybe I’m just making stuff up. I don’t remember.

        Adores: 2
        • 2009 December 26
          develish1 permalink

          maybe they just should be?

          Adores: 1
        • 2009 December 27
          Lola permalink

          Can’t purchase a ferret in NYC. I have seen them at the vets’ there, though, so apparently if you bring one in from elsewhere, they don’t do anything. I don’t know why. Maybe they just hate on cute rodents.

          Adores: 2
  10. 2009 December 24
    sarajean80 permalink

    Please don’t blame me for this asshat, I’m just the messenger 🙂

    Happy holidays, everyone ♥

    Adores: 4
    • 2009 December 24
      GrahamT permalink

      Good find!

      Adores: 1
    • 2009 December 24
      Cled permalink

      Hitching a ride on your holiday wishes, sarajean, to wish my own to everyone here.

      I’m on my way to Bethlehem. (Yes, seriously. I live nearby in Jerusalem.) All the YSaC crowd will have a little place in my heart while I’m there.

      Adores: 4
      • 2009 December 24
        Windrose permalink

        Cled, how Awesome! Are you going on a donkey? Will you stay in a stable? Will there be sheep and wise men? 8) Enjoy, no matter what!

        Adores: 1
  11. 2009 December 24
    queensbee permalink

    as in spiny norman???

    Adores: 4
    • 2009 December 24
      tacomagic permalink

      Dinsdale?!

      Dinsdale?!

      Dinsdale, Dinsdale?!

      Adores: 7
    • 2009 December 24
      Windrose permalink

      Python reference for the WIN!

      Adores: 2
  12. 2009 December 24

    I don’t see what’s so bad about this one. She has a litter of hedgehogs that she can no longer take car of so she wants homes for them. Hedgehogs are adorable.

    Adores: 1
    • 2009 December 25
      Windrose permalink

      BassBone, what’s “bad” is the reference to the hedgehogs as the poster’s kids, while at the same time trying to sell them off. Then there’s the punctuation missing, the lack of capitals, the speeling, etc. These are a few of our favorite things!

      Adores: 4
  13. 2009 December 24
    Addicted Reader permalink

    Now that I look at it again, I notice this:

    “i paid 250 each plus shiping for the adults” (emphasis added)

    Assuming that’s supposed to say “shipping,” who sent hedgehogs through the mail???

    There is clearly something I’m not understanding here.

    Adores: 3
    • 2009 December 24
      Windrose permalink

      Dogs, cats, birds, and I would think other animals, are often shipped via airline or USPS. There are regulations, but it can be done. Usually, the weather plays a huge factor in the possibility of sending the animals. Even fertile eggs can be shipped.

      Adores: 2
    • 2009 December 25

      Shipping hedgehogs – but of course: Air freight prices typically run $139 to $169 through Pet Air………

      Adores: 2
    • 2010 December 25
      Addicted Reader permalink

      Wow, coming back to this a year later is pretty cool, as I can now corey up my own question!

      [flying pets corey] Some friends of mine adopted kittens from a brother halfway across the country. They were dropped off at the airport by the brother in a cat carrier and met at the airport here by my friend. She had to be there when the plane landed so that they wouldn’t just be sitting around in baggage claim or where ever. [/corey]

      Adores: 1
  14. 2009 December 24
    ladycrim permalink

    Seems to me the seller could solve both problems by giving the hedgehogs to his sister’s kids for Christmas.

    Adores: 2
  15. 2009 December 24
    Caitlyn permalink

    Awwww man, I wish this was in my area, I’ve wanted a hedgehog for soooo long but my parents just let me get a cat instead. The only breeder I know of here sells for $200 each and there’s like a year-long waiting list haha

    Adores: 2
  16. 2009 December 24

    Movie titles and ideas:

    How the Hedgehog Stole Christmas?

    Wild Hogs (But about Hedgehogs..?)

    Grandma Got Run Over by a Hedgehog

    Horton Hears a Hedgehog

    Hedgehog Potter…

    Okay, I’m done. 🙂

    Adores: 6
  17. 2009 December 24
    Windrose permalink

    Today, a day that will live in infamy, or possibly New Jersey, Tacomagic has yet again won the coveted Christmas Eve Punch. There will be a candlelight service following his induction.

    Adores: 1
    • 2009 December 25
      Tacomagic permalink

      Yay, another punch on my card. I don’t suppose you know how many that is now? Like 4?

      How many is it again for the free coffee?

      Adores: 1
      • 2009 December 25
        Windrose permalink

        Sure, let’s go with 4. 8) It’s all virtual to me. I think you have to get the whole card punched to get anything free. But you’ll probably be the first one there!

        Adores: 1
        • 2009 December 25
          Tacomagic permalink

          Yay! A vague yet seemingly attainable goal. I’m gonna give it a double helping of effort :).

          Adores: 1
  18. 2009 December 24
    Windrose permalink

    Hello? *tap, tap* Is this thing on? *

    Guess everyone except for me has family and holiday stuff to take care of. *sniff*

    Adores: 1
  19. 2009 December 25
    FireManSteve-O permalink

    One bright and sunshiney (or is it sunshine-y? A little help Isaac…) day I will be witty enough to get my card punched. The problem is my bi-polar snarkiness; I am clever some days and others, I can’t conjure anything. Oh well, Merry Christmas everyone.

    Adores: 1
    • 2009 December 25
      Windrose permalink

      Steve-O, someday the perfect post will come your way, and you will achieve your moment in the Don’t Suck box. 8) I just know it! Happy and Merry to you, too!

      Adores: 1
    • 2009 December 25
      Tacomagic permalink

      Just remember to read the other posts in the topic. Sometimes you can build on other peoples’ wit or they’ll inspire you to great snarkiness.

      Parasitic Snarkiness would be an awesome band name.

      Adores: 5
      • 2009 December 27
        Lola permalink

        I got the new Parasitic Snarkiness album on the collectible vinyl for Christmas!

        … Having trouble uploading it, though …

        Adores: 2
      • 2010 December 25
        CapnMac permalink

        Oh, they are such a rip-off of Snark Parasites <faux indignation>

        Adores: 1
  20. 2009 December 25
    Kat permalink

    It seems hedgehogs are somehow cheaper than puppies. I’ll take one!

    Adores: 1
  21. 2009 December 27
    Luisa permalink

    When I was little, my dad and I made up a series of stories about a hedgehog family. Then one day I found a real hedgie outside our apartment building. I guess some idiot tried keeping it as a pet and got tired of it… :-/ I picked her up with an oven mitt, took her inside and fed her a bowl of milk. She lapped it up and proceeded to explore the table on which we set her to eat. She didn’t seem really scared, just kind of curious. There is a hilly/foresty area near our city and we took her there and let her go. But I don’t know what kind of person would take home a live animal and just let it go in the middle of a city. I think the poster was really irresponsible–she should have taken the baby hedgies to a shelter.

    Adores: 3
  22. 2010 December 25
    LimeLolly permalink

    Heavens- my child is so spoiled and a bit prickly when having a temper-tantrum.

    ♫Please Christmas, don’t be late… leaving that is. ♫

    Adores: 5
  23. 2010 December 25

    Mary Beesmas, everyone. The smallest turkey I could find was still 9 lbs, so, dry turkey sammiches for everyone next week! Come and get ’em! Seriously, I think this year could have gone far worse than it did; I thank the stars and stuff that I found this little corner of (in)sanity when I did, and I would like to thank you all for your patience and understanding. Just think, my New Years post will make even less sense! OK! Time to see what the Lllamanun and the Ostrimu brung me! (BBUT)

    Adores: 5
  24. 2010 December 25
    CoffDrop permalink

    Oh you selfish, selfish animals! It’s Christmas – share that hedge you hogs…….

    Adores: 9
    • 2010 December 25
      LimeLolly permalink

      They went “Over The Hedge”. 8)

      Adores: 8
  25. 2010 December 25
    Windrose permalink

    *hands out egg nog and champagne Punchity Punch Punch*

    May your Beesmas be Mary and Bright! If anyone got a pony, I think it was supposed to be mine. 8)

    Adores: 5
    • 2010 December 25

      “Dear Buddha,
      Please bring me a pony and a plastic rocket.”

      Adores: 3
  26. 2010 December 25
    LimeLolly permalink

    testing from my brand spanking new kindle very cool.

    Adores: 3
    • 2010 December 25
      Windrose permalink

      Cool! Download some Merry for us!

      Adores: 1
  27. 2010 December 25
    Mindfield permalink

    Merry Beesmas 2010! Made the turkey last night so we can have turkey sandwiches or hot turkey today. Biggun this year. We’re going to be in tryptophan overload. Also got a metric ton of gravy. Anybody need some?

    Funny, but before I joined in the comments here I read the entire archives but don’t really remember this one. Still, it could be another chapter in the saga of Pickles and Winston.

    Adores: 4
    • 2010 December 25
      Windrose permalink

      I don’t have a turkey this year, but I love gravy! I got potatoes! Send it over! Happy and Merry, and such. Off to visit with family, and then home to watch birds destroying the toys I made for them last night!

      Adores: 3
  28. 2010 December 25
    LimeLolly permalink

    Jingle bells, briny smells,
    Hedgie laid a toot
    It set afire our heart’s desire
    We bought a bandicoot.

    *shakes empty flask*

    Adores: 9
    • 2010 December 25

      Christmas Hedgies


      Christmas hedgehog’s tasty hedgehogs
      Dressed in hollandaise sauce
      In the oven
      Till there’s a hint
      of crispness
      Children lunching
      People crunching
      Spitting spine after spine
      And in every corner pet shop you’ll see

      Hedgy sales hedgy sales
      Christmas hedgehogs they’re so tasty
      Dripping in heavy cream
      Soon they will be my Christmas meal

      Merry Beesmas everyone, dinner is on me!

      P.S. I’m in the Christmas box!
      I’m waiting for someone to unwrap me…

      Adores: 9
      • 2010 December 25
        LimeLolly permalink

        Let’s get Mikey. He’ll try anything.

        Adores: 5
  29. 2010 December 25

    Merry all! Have a wonderful day with family and friends.

    Adores: 3
  30. 2010 December 25
    Addicted Reader permalink

    I’m liking the trip to the past. It’s interesting to see regular commenters who have left us and the evolution of our inside jokes – no mention of Beesmas in last year’s comments, for instance.

    I hope that everyone who had a holiday enjoyed it.

    And to all those in the path of the coming blizzard/s, stay safe and warm!

    Adores: 5
    • 2010 December 25
      Addicted Reader permalink

      I guess I scared everyone away…

      I guess I’ll see you all tomorrow.

      Even more so since I might be snowed in.

      Adores: 1
      • 2010 December 25
        Windrose permalink

        Wait, I want to send you a funny! Oh, I can post it on Facebook, I guess. 8)

        Here’s the link:

        http://www.geekosystem.com/christmas-tradition/

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 December 25

          Chinese food on Christmas Eve is a tradition on my side of the family, so we ordered from our favorite Chinese place yesterday 🙂

          Adores: 1
      • 2010 December 25
        LimeLolly permalink

        I ain’t skeered… just a quiet night at home, and not a whole lot to say.

        Adores: 1
      • 2010 December 26
        Mindfield permalink

        Chinese food is a New Year’s tradition on my wife’s side of the family. Specifically, going to a Chinese buffet, usually Mandarin. I think it stems from my father-in-law’s love of buffets, because he can pay one price and eat as much as he can — and he eats like a singularity.

        Adores: 1
  31. 2010 December 26
    Windrose permalink

    Hammy, All is calm, All is bright, Round yon Punchity Punch Punch!

    G’Night, Spiney Normandy!

    Adores: 1

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