YSaC, Vol. 540: You can’t even eat just one.

2010 January 8

Pottery Barn Chesapeake Chaise and Solid Cherry Red Cushion-New – $550 (New In The Box)


Cheasapeake Chaise with Red solid Chusion. The chase is still New In The Box. with Plastic Wrapping and all.

The Cushion is also new, but in the box.

we decided to sell our one, since we will not be getting another. what is the point of only haveing one.

Features

•Crafted of FSC-certified, sustainably harvested eucalyptus, a dense hardwood that’s ideal for outdoor furniture because it’s rich in moisture-resistant oils.
•Features 4 positions, pullout drink holder and back wheels for mobility.
•Kiln-dried hardwood and mortise-and-tenon joinery provide superb strength and durability.
•Hand rubbed with a teak-oil stain that enhances eucalyptus’ inherent moisture resistance and accentuates its warm honey hue.
•Detailed with marine-grade hardware in an antique-brass finish.
•Adjustable levelers add stability on uneven ground.
•Thick weatherproof cushion in ring-spun polyester canvas or Sunbrella® fabric (not tufted).
•Imported.

Details
•Overall: 32″ wide x 90″ long x 16″ high
•Cushion: 26″ wide x 83″ long x 2.5″ thick

Can Sell Seperately—

Chaise $350
Cushion $100

Can Bring to you for gas fee!!

You know, I’d almost decided to buy this, but then they came up with the great existential question that has baffled mankind since the beginning: “What is the point of only haveing one.” (It’s such an existential question that it doesn’t even require a question mark at the end.)

What is the point of having only one chaise lounge (or longue, if you prefer)? I mean, one chaise can only hold a limited number of weasels, so it’s not particularly useful for that purpose. (Everyone knows that the minimum weasel number is seven.) I mean, what am I supposed to do with just one? It’s not even covered in bees, for crying out loud.

But $550 is really a bargain, especially since separately the chaise would cost $350 and the cushion $100. Maybe they’re including the bees and weasels* for the extra $100. But there’s still only one chaise, and really … what is the point of only haveing one.

*The Bee and Weasel would be a great name for an English pub, don’t you think? Dan thinks the formula for English Pub Naming Conventions has to be “(some kind of animal) and (some kind of farm implement)” — like The Axolotl and Combine Harvester.

Thanks, Jeanne!

138 Responses leave one →
  1. 2010 January 8

    More math questions? Dammit!!

    I’m in Texas, my brain is frozen.

    Stop it!

    Adores: 4
  2. 2010 January 8
    JAMen permalink

    This would have been perfect for our new house. Out on the back patio. Dammit. If only they hadn’t made me actually THINK before I bought something. It never pays to put off an impulse buyer.

    Adores: 3
  3. 2010 January 8
    Lola permalink

    Chase/chaise, Chesapeake/Cheasapeake – and that’s just in the title and first two sentences.

    My brain is broken. Not just from the inconsistent speeling, but also from the whirlpool of existentialism flowing from “what is the point of only haveing one.”

    Maybe they thought if they got a pair that they would mate and produce little lounges/longues, but with one – spontaneous generation is out. So why bother?
    (My first thought? “One is still fine to have sex on.” I’ll go bleach my brain now.)

    And finally, the upper right and lower left pics – wtf are we supposed to be looking at? Theoretically, the item, but what are we actually looking at?

    Adores: 7
    • 2010 January 8

      Re: bizarre pics–
      “See? Things exist! Makes you want to buy this, doesn’t it?”

      Adores: 3
    • 2010 January 8
      sarajean80 permalink

      The answer is simple; it’s the Highlander of chaise lounges.

      There can be only one…chaise lounge.

      Adores: 30
      • 2010 January 8
        Meredith permalink

        I don’t know if it’s sad or awesome, how often this line makes it’s way into my daily conversations.

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 January 8
          sarajean80 permalink

          I like awesome, let’s go with awesome. It makes me feel better about how often I use it.
          (Do you try to do it with a Sean Connery accent, or is that just me?)

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 January 8

          I say it in a Sean Connery accent. Sometimes I alternate it with an Adrian Paul accent though.

          Mmm. Adrian Paul. So yummy. Mmmm.

          *blinks*

          What were we talking about again?

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 January 9
          Windrose permalink

          We were talking about sexy men in kilts. *drool*

          Adores: 1
    • 2010 January 8
      lost_compass permalink

      Seems like a pair of mating chaises would produce ottomen.

      Adores: 22
      • 2010 January 8
        Lola permalink

        Ottoboys, when they are babies.

        Adores: 10
        • 2010 January 8
          sarajean80 permalink

          I thought they would be ottobabbies.

          Adores: 15
        • 2010 January 8
          Mimi permalink

          Or ottolets?

          *edited to add that after reading that, it’s not funny at all. I’ll let my brain wake up before posting again*

          Adores: 7
    • 2010 January 8
      Ed Snyder permalink

      “One is still fine to have sex on.”

      I believe that is called “the thrill of the chaise.”

      Adores: 60
      • 2010 January 8
        Meredith permalink

        The comments today are just too good.

        Adores: 2
      • 2010 January 8
        Sou permalink

        Everytime I give someone a point, a pop-up accuses me of cheating. Has something changed during the months I was away from my favorite website?

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 January 8

          Step 1: Make sure you are using the most recent version of IE or Firefox
          Step 2: Clear your cache – cookies, offline files, etc.
          Step 3: ????
          Step 4: PROFIT!

          Adores: 10
  4. 2010 January 8

    A solid cherry cushion seems… uncomfortable, to say the least.

    Adores: 6
    • 2010 January 8
      Addicted Reader permalink

      Aww, I was going to comment on that.

      Adores: 1
      • 2010 January 8

        You’ve got to get up pretty early in the morning to not have all the good snark taken before you get here…

        Adores: 9
        • 2010 January 8
          sarajean80 permalink

          I have some extra snark if anyone needs any, I got it free off CraigsList.

          *Peers into filthy cardboard box patched with duck tape.

          I’m afraid if it doesn’t get used it will go bad and my house will start to smell like failure.

          Adores: 20
        • 2010 January 8
          Windrose permalink

          But I got up TOO early, and had to go to work before the post was up. *grumbles*

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 January 8

          I said pretty early, not TOO early.
          *smilie*

          Adores: 2
  5. 2010 January 8

    Two words: Hand rubbed.

    Adores: 3
  6. 2010 January 8
    screamer permalink

    Will my Not.A.Lion be able to lounge on it? Is there a place to store all the snacks I went dumpster diving for? Hey, I managed to adopt several of those cats? Will their hair cover the red solid ‘chusion’ in the first day? And is a solid chusion all that comfortable?

    So many questions, too little time to ponder them.

    Adores: 12
    • 2010 January 8
      mudslicker permalink

      I’d like to be able to grill my cheese so I’ll take Halloumi!

      (I believe that’s Sleep Number 98)

      Adores: 2
    • 2010 January 8

      O.M.G. *She said, wiping the tears and mascara from her face.

      Y’all are just too damned funny.

      Adores: 2
  7. 2010 January 8
    sarajean80 permalink

    “…Chesapeake…”

    Makes me think of a mountain made of cheese. I call the boulder of extra sharp cheddar!

    Adores: 6
    • 2010 January 8
      Lola permalink

      Fine. Smoked goat Gouda is mine.

      Adores: 2
    • 2010 January 8

      I’ll take all the Colby Jack.

      Adores: 1
    • 2010 January 8
      LurkRealClose permalink

      Awwww, sarajean took the extra sharp cheddar. I’ll take the Brie. There must be a lot of soft cheeses, since the chusion is solid. Balances it out, you know?

      Adores: 3
      • 2010 January 8
        sarajean80 permalink

        I am quite susceptible to bribes ;)

        Adores: 0
    • 2010 January 8
      Dan permalink

      drmk and I are quite partial to Garrotxa.

      Adores: 0
    • 2010 January 8
      Lola permalink

      My favorite cheese name ever is one called Drunken Goat. It’s Spanish, and the rounds are immersed in red wine, which gives it color on the outside, as well as additional flavor.

      Adores: 2
    • 2010 January 8
      Meredith permalink

      Being born and raised by the Chesapeake, it is so funny to hear what it conjures in others minds. For me, it’s the sound of waves crashing as I fall asleep, summers walking down the block to the beach. Oh, and the lovely smell of Red Tide, which is not all unlike the smell of a finely aged cheese. Or the smell of death, but whatever.

      Adores: 4
    • 2010 January 8
      PrincessLuceval permalink

      I’d rather eat cheese than anything, it’s my favorite food. And one of my favorite cheeses is havarti with dill. On Trader Joe’s Triscuit-like crackers, only better for you because there’s no fat. I save my fat intake for the cheese.

      Adores: 0
      • 2010 January 8
        sweetbiscuit21 permalink

        I’m with you PL. On my first trip to London, I managed to spend $100.00 at the Harrod’s Cheese counter. It was a sublime experience. St Andre Triple Cream Brie is heaven on a (carr’s) cracker.

        Adores: 0
        • 2010 January 8

          Oooooh. I’m totally envious of your time at the Harrod’s Cheese Counter.

          It must be like Cheese Mecca.

          *wipes up drool*

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 January 8
          Meredith permalink

          You’ll have a food orgasm in there. But the British are great about taking that in stride, and will barely giggle at you at all.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 January 8
          sweetbiscuit21 permalink

          Seriously, it seems like it’s about 100 metres long, and has every conceivable cheese in the world – although I am yet to try Drunken Goat. The great thing is, the staff let you have little tiny tastes to help you make make up your mind. The caviar counter sadly did not.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 December 24

          There’s a specialist cheese shop at Borough Market in London called Neal’s Yard Dairy – it’s absolutely cheese heaven. I had to be dragged out after standing there inhaling cheese essence. Also you get to taste stuff – I tasted a blue cheese called Stichelton and it was simply the best thing ever. Even better than raspberry beer or gingerbread.

          (Note from the future – I am now less than a year behind in the archives and may actually catch up soon).

          Adores: 0
    • 2010 January 8
      Steve-O permalink

      Sweet, the American aerosol cheese isn’t taken! Thats my favorite! No seriously though, I am not that low class. I prefer a smoked Velveeta and a glass of ’09 Thunderbird.

      Adores: 4
      • 2010 January 8
        sarajean80 permalink

        How exactly does one smoke Velveeta? I’d think it would gunk up the rolling papers.

        Oh,I couldn’t find any ’09 Thunderbird. I did find this mason jar partially filled with clear liquid in the back of the cabinet. Will that do?

        Adores: 13
        • 2010 January 8
          Lola permalink

          It will if it’s one of those old collectible blue-tinted ones with the zinc lids that I always thought looked like lead (excellent in conjunction with preserved food!) and is in an old crumpled paper bag that has “white litenin” scribbled on it in china marker in my, oops, your grandfather’s handwriting. Mmm, just don’t go blind!

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 January 8
          Windrose permalink

          Could I have the Swiss, miss? 8) Okay, lame. I’ve had a rough day, and I am about to go talk to someone who can estimate just how crazy I actually am. BBL.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 January 8
          Steve-O permalink

          The hardest part is keeping it lit.

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 January 8
          sarajean80 permalink

          @ Lola – I do have several that meet that discription, sans bag. Some were my Gramma’s, but Mom threw most of the canning out when we moved Gramma and Grampa off the farm without bothering to salvage the jars because there were so many. Most don’t have the unnamed clear liquid inside, though. I do keep ground coffee in one and dried beans in a tall one with a glass lid.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 January 8
          Christina permalink

          Since Lola called both aged gouda and drunken goat, I’d like to call dibbs on Shropshire blue and Chaumes.

          Adores: 0
  8. 2010 January 8
    PrincessLuceval permalink

    New In The Box – my mind veers between Jack In The Box restaurant and Dick In A Box from SNL.

    I like how they were all over the place with the capitalization and spelling, until they got to the description, which was plagiarized word for word from the (New In The) Box.

    And why only have one, indeed. Especially if the Chusion is not tufted.

    Adores: 7
    • 2010 January 8

      Step 1: Cut a hole in a box
      Step 2: Put your junk in the box

      Adores: 0
      • 2010 January 8
        Meredith permalink

        All my junk? I’ve got a lot of junk. I’m not sure it will all fit, but I’ll try.

        Some of my junk:
        78 copies of Victoria magazine, dating 1991-2002
        20 votive holders of various style
        19 scarves
        A fully pose able John McCain action figure
        WWE Uno cards
        Over 4000 $ worth of cosmetics
        A Kaiju Big Battel limited edition poster
        4 Ipod chargers
        34 bottles of unused perfume
        A set of Marvel comics glasses
        100 Archie magazines

        This is GOOD junk! If I left this junk out on the curb, it would be picked up in a second!

        Adores: 7
        • 2010 January 8

          I would like to bid on your John McCain action figure. Does it fit in the limited edition exploding A-4 on the deck of the Forrestal?

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 January 8
          Meredith permalink

          ha ha Graham.

          I got him at ComicCon. Turned a corner, and there, in glorious glowing excess, was a pyramid of McCain dolls no less than 8 feet tall and 5 feet wide. Sucker was flippin HUGE. Course, it was after the election, so they were going for a buck. SCORE!!!

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 January 8
          Lola permalink

          *madly covets your makeup and perfume*

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 January 8

          Is he in a flight suit?

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 January 8
          Bianchi Sound permalink

          I just want to know how you get the perfume back in the bottle after you use it.

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 January 8
          Meredith permalink

          Nope, just a regular grey suit. Red tie.

          Just looked at the box. Shit. You. Not. It’s called, and I quote,

          A Call to “Action” Figure.

          Yeah.

          Lola, for many years I worked as a makeup artist, and made a lot of connections in retail. So anytime someone came in with new stuff, I got a sample. They also give you 300 dollars of free stuff every six months in a retail company. Wish I was back there. Damn economy.

          I have friends who’s makeup is actually insured.

          Adores: 3
        • 2010 January 8

          A suit? Come on. The man is a war overseas contingency operation hero, fer Chrissakes!

          Adores: 4
        • 2010 January 8
          Bianchi Sound permalink

          The McCain dolls are 8 feet tall and 5 feet wide? Well, no wonder they couldn’t sell them.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 January 8
          sarajean80 permalink

          @ Meredith – Sadly working at a credit union does not have the same perks either. Taking home “samples” would result in me taking a lengthy vacation at federal expense.

          Adores: 5
        • 2010 January 8
          Windrose permalink

          Wow, I wonder if your Marvel Comics glasses are worth more than my Batman and Robin glasses?

          Adores: 1
      • 2010 January 8

        Also, +5 for alternate (but acceptable) spelling of “gray.” I’ve been fighting with teachers and professors for years over that.

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 January 8
          Lola permalink

          It’s a perfectly acceptable alternate spelling, and I prefer it, personally (no reason, just do).

          I’m economizing on makeup these days, but can completely understand where a makeup artist or stylist would need to insure their collection. Losing it all would be the equivalent in my profession to a total hard drive crash and no internet, and then all the books are lost too.

          I had a friend whose mother worked for a well-known cosmetics company (they have multiple brand lines and carry a person’s name) and the stuff she got just for working for them … wow.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 January 8
          sweetbiscuit21 permalink

          In my book, it’s the only way to spell the colour – the other way is someone’s surname.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 January 9
          Meredith permalink

          I fight my spell check every time I write that, and feel more than a hint of satisfaction at ignoring it. “Ha. You think I screwed up, Clippy, but I KNOW more than YOU, now don’t I???”

          Adores: 4
        • 2010 January 9
          Lola permalink

          Yeah, I hate that damn Clippy bastard. The dog and cat are marginally less annoying, but as I occasionally need them I do keep them around.

          Why don’t they have a Clive Owen, or Sean Bean or [sexily-accented, attractive star of your choosing] one?

          Adores: 0
        • 2013 December 7
          Katimomkat permalink

          Also, +5 for alternate (but acceptable) spelling of “gray.” I’ve been fighting with teachers and professors for years over that.

          Graham,

          I know what you mean about fighting with teachers over the word “grey.” In my 7 th grade English class I used “grey” in a composition and my teacher marked it as a spelling error. Being the shy, retiring person I’ve always been, I raised my hand, and without waiting to be called upon, stood up and boldly said, “Mrs. Simpson, you marked my paper with a spelling error for spelling ‘gray’ G-R-E-Y, but it’s not wrong!” “Yes, it is. The word is spelled G-R-A-Y,” she said sternly. “But you can spell it G-R-E-Y, too!!” “Noooo, it is spelled with an A!” **stomping my foot** “Well you’re just WRONG, and I can PROVE it!!” Running to the book stand in the back of the room, I flipped the pages of the classroom dictionary to the “G” section, swept the book up and marched with it to Mrs. Simpson’s desk, where I pointed to the word “Gray” and said “Look! See? It says right here, Gray, (British variant, grey!) G-R-E-Y!” She spat at me, “Yes, but it is a British variant so only the British can spell it with an “E!” {me, ***facepalm***}

          My grades were exemplary, but my Deportment scores weren’t very good in her class. :D

          Adores: 0
        • 2013 December 8
          Katimomkat permalink

          Aaand, a day later I realize I am replying to a 4 year old comment. *facepalm*

          Adores: 0
  9. 2010 January 8

    For Sale- One CL poster with poor spelling and math skills New – $250

    The poster is Still New in The Box with plastic Wrapping and Everything! The Skills are also new but in the box.

    i decided to sell my one, because what is the point of only haveing one.

    Features

    *Crafted of YSAC certified sustainably harvested stupidity, a dense head that’s ideal for CraigsList posting .

    *Features many positions. Some illegal in Texas.

    *Sun dried skin and muscle and cartilage joints provide average durability.

    * Please don’t ask what is hand rubbed.

    * Detailed with hard underwear in an antique finish.

    * Thick, weatherproof skull.

    * Adjustable feet and legs for uneven ground.

    * Domestically grown.

    Details

    Overall -30″ wide x 68″ high

    Brain – 140mm wide x 167 mm long x 93 mm high – immeasurably dense.

    Can Sell Separately –

    Poster – $200

    Brain – $25

    Can Bring to you for gas and chloroform fee!

    Adores: 48
    • 2010 January 8
      sarajean80 permalink

      That was BRILLANT! It’s going in my “Gee, I wish I’d thought of that” file next to l-c’s “movie” from yesterday.

      Adores: 2
      • 2010 January 8

        The sad part about it? I actually looked up the dimensions of an average brain because I was afraid if I faked it, someone here would correct me.

        Adores: 5
        • 2010 January 8
          sarajean80 permalink

          Kudos on the diligent research, Kelli! I would have just taken your word for it.

          It’s not like I sit around all day obsessively Google-ing obscure facts just to prove people wrong.

          awkward silence interrupted by a single cricket chirping

          Well, not all day.

          Adores: 11
        • 2010 January 9
          Lola permalink

          “It’s not like I sit around all day obsessively Google-ing obscure facts just to prove people wrong.”
          Sarajean, I do that and get paid for it. It’s called litigation [working for litigators and other lawyers, to be precise]. (Also, we use things other than Google, but it’s the same process.) It’s nothing to be ashamed of! *cashes paycheck*

          Adores: 0
    • 2010 January 8
      Lola permalink

      + a bajillion!

      I don’t know which line is my favorite; either:
      “certified sustainably harvested stupidity”
      or
      “* Please don’t ask what is hand rubbed.”

      It’s all bloody genius.

      Adores: 2
    • 2010 January 8
      lost_compass permalink

      Dammit, kelli.

      I sure do wish that the Projectile Nasal Coffee Spewing Monitor/Keyboard Crystal-Clear Splash Guard™ that I ordered would come.

      Adores: 7
      • 2010 January 8
        Windrose permalink

        Okay, L_C. Here’s your bajillionth card punch.

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 January 9
          lost_compass permalink

          Thanks, windrose – but, let’s face it, without the inspired dialogue, and hair color choices, none of this would have been possible.

          Adores: 0
    • 2010 January 8

      Genius!! And right out of the box!

      Adores: 0
  10. 2010 January 8

    on the subject of UK pub names, being a brit I thought I’d let you in on the name of one located in our closest city.

    The Frog And Onion

    Don’t ask me why it’s called that, I have no idea. And that’s just one that popped into my head as it’s local, but a quick search also located these (and no I am not making these up);

    The Rat And Carrot
    The Rat And Ratchet
    The Frog And Parrot
    The Sack Of Potatoes

    And just for the Llamanun

    The Waltzing Weasel

    Adores: 1
    • 2010 January 8
      kireina permalink

      See, now, why can’t the fake British pub designers get on that wagon? All our quasi-pubs are named things like Four Courts, Union Pub, and so-and-so’s Irish Pub. The closest to correct nomenclature is the Black Rooster.

      Adores: 0
      • 2010 January 8
        Mimi permalink

        We have one in the nearest “big city” called The Cock and Bull. No joke.

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 January 8
          Bianchi Sound permalink

          Ah, nothing like a good Cock and Bull story.

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 January 8
          SoundsLikeVla permalink

          Ours is Beer and Loathing…although their liquor license was just revoked, so that makes it rather less like a pub…

          Adores: 3
      • 2010 January 8
        sarajean80 permalink

        There’s an Irish-style pub downtown called Tir na nOg (I checked, that is how they capitolize it.),which is close to a Chinese restaurant called The Duck and Dumpling, which I thought was a pub the first time I drove past. (There’s also a music hall on the same square called The Pour House, I think because it used to be a bar.)

        Given a choice I prefer The Flying Saucer, not just for the name but because it has over a hundred types of beer and you can get an ice cream float made with Young’s Double Chocolate Stout for dessert.

        Adores: 0
        • 2010 January 8
          Irregular Fractal permalink

          I think we’ve determined the venue for the next YSaC meetup, sj.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 January 8
          sarajean80 permalink

          I fell in love with the Saucer the first time I went there, before I even knew they served ice cream in beer.
          When you walk in the door there is one of those signs on a skinny post, the ones that normally say “Please wait to be seated”, except the one they have says “Find your own damn seat.”

          You guys would fit right in.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 January 9
          Lola permalink

          Tir na nOg reflects Irish Gaelic capitalization and is, you’re right, correct. Think of the n in nOg like a l’ in a French word that is a proper noun, e.g., l’Ecole. It isn’t the equivalent, but it’s correct not to be capitalized.

          /master’s degree studies pendantry

          Adores: 0
    • 2010 January 8
      Lola permalink

      My favorite in London was The Queen’s Head.
      Why just her head? The signage depicted Victoria specifically. Why Victoria’s head? Considering the queens in English history who were parted from theirs with alarming regularity (I’m looking at you, Henry VIII!) I guess it was more tasteful not to feature someone who had actually been beheaded (“We’re all having a drink down at Anne Boleyn’s Head!”), but the idea of naming it after a specific body part was weird to me.

      Adores: 6
      • 2010 January 8

        actually, our local bar is called The Queens Head too. The artwork on the signs is a bit vague, probably for legal reasons etc, but I’d say it resembles Elizabeth I.

        Adores: 0
        • 2010 January 8
          sweetbiscuit21 permalink

          There was an old (100 years is old in Oz) pub in my hometown that was renovated into Ye Auld English style in the mid 90′s.

          It was renamed “The Dead Rat” at this time.

          After about 2 years it changed names to the Rat and Parrot. Not sure if it’s still called that now or if it closed up………..

          Adores: 0
      • 2010 January 8
        Bianchi Sound permalink

        A toilet is referred to in some parts of the world as “The Head,” so perhaps it means The Queen’s Toilet. That’s charming.

        It could also be referring to a service the Queen performs, but that would be vulgar…

        Adores: 7
        • 2010 January 8
          Bianchi Sound permalink

          Ooh, wait, The Queen’s Head could have a card room in the back- “The Queen’s Back Door.”

          I was going to say “The Queen’s Reach Around,” but again, vulgar.

          I am obviously not British.

          Adores: 6
      • 2010 January 8

        if anyone’s curious, there’s a website you can look them up on

        http://www.beerintheevening.com/

        oh and mudslicker, there really is a Fur And Feathers Inn

        Adores: 0
        • 2010 January 8
          Lola permalink

          May not be vulgar, Bianchi S., depending on what type of queen one was discussing.

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 January 8
          Depresyy permalink

          Too true. Perhaps not “THE” Queen, but just “A” queen.

          But if it’s in Queens, who the hell knows what their talking about…

          Adores: 3
        • 2010 January 8
          Bianchi Sound permalink

          Damn, Depressy took over my computer for a minute. Barely got out of that alive!

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 January 8

          That totally ruined the magic of Depressy for me. Thanks a lot. It’s like the time I woke up and found out the Tooth Fairy was really my neighbor.

          Adores: 3
        • 2010 January 8
          Luke Skywalker permalink

          Imagine how I felt when I found out I was trying to kill my dad and I had the hots for my sister!

          Adores: 14
        • 2010 January 8
          TIE Pilot permalink

          That made me throw up a little in my helmet.

          Adores: 11
        • 2010 January 9
          Lola permalink

          I figured it was someone who was a regular, but didn’t want to guess who, just wanted to enjoy the site-specific meme or whatever it is called.

          Adores: 0
      • 2010 January 9
        Jinx permalink

        Around the corner from our hotel was a little place called “The Swan”. Hubby pronounced that it was a real dive!

        Adores: 0
    • 2010 January 8
      mudslicker permalink

      I believe that they can also be named after animal body parts:

      The Hoof and Tail Pub-a-Rama

      The Fur and Feathers Pub-a-Rama

      The Fin and Scales Pub-a-Rama

      The Pouch and Paw Pub-a-Rama

      The Balls and Testicles Pub-a-Rama

      Adores: 2
      • 2010 January 8
        arallyn permalink

        My kid brother is currently in England and called me last night (for him) from a pub called Ye Olde Fighting Cocks. I shit you not. Apparently it’s a crazy old pub, too.

        Adores: 2
        • 2010 January 8
          Lola permalink

          Actually, I think this blog could generate a good name of its own, from our fine hosts:
          “The llama and ostrimu”

          Adores: 3
      • 2010 January 8
        Bianchi Sound permalink

        “The Balls and Testicles Pub-a-Rama”

        I think they changed their name to the Repetition and Redundancy Public House

        Adores: 2
        • 2010 January 8
          mudslicker permalink

          They were fresh out of “cocks” that day since apparently every other pub was partial to the double entendre. So they just decided to double up on their balls (what’s the point of only having one set?).

          Maybe they just should have called it the Scrotii & Suds Pub-a-Rama.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 January 8
          Ed Snyder permalink

          Just drop the unnecessary preamble and call it the Pube-a-Rama.

          Adores: 8
  11. 2010 January 8

    Great sales pitch:

    “what is the point of only haveing one.”

    What’s the point of only buying one?

    Adores: 11
    • 2010 January 8
      Andrea permalink

      That was my first thought too, followed by “Do llamas really have ‘paws’?”

      Adores: 6
      • 2010 January 8

        good point, they have hooves surely?

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 January 8
          arallyn permalink

          Llamas have feet!

          http://www.charliethellama.com/images/foot4.jpg

          they have wicked sharp claws on those feet, though :(

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 January 8

          Not hooves — they have soft paws like dogs. But arallyn is right — they’ve got toenails that could cause quite a bit of damage.

          Adores: 1
  12. 2010 January 8
    Bianchi Sound permalink

    The point of halving one would be to have two, each half the size of the original.

    Adores: 9
    • 2010 January 8
      InsideJoke permalink

      I’ll give you $550 for one, or $600 for both halves.

      Adores: 3
  13. 2010 January 8

    Hmmm…. now that I think about it…. what’s the point of haveing only one of anything?! I have only one cat….. but what’s the point of haveing only one? Clearly, I need more. I have only one bed. I mean, I fit in it great and it’s soft and everything… but what if I have guests? Where will they sleep?! I will probably need more. Maybe 7 beds. I wonder if I could fit them all in my bedroom?

    Adores: 5
    • 2010 January 8
      Andrea permalink

      In the house I lived in in college, we had a couple spare rooms, so we filled one with air mattresses that covered the floor and walls and it was like an indoor bouncy house. So you could always do that…

      Adores: 6
      • 2010 January 8

        I have a feeling that a bouncy house made out of solid cherry cushions might be a little short lived.

        Adores: 4
    • 2010 January 8
      mudslicker permalink

      Seven beds…hehe…one for

      Sleepy

      Sneezy

      Grumpy

      etc….

      Adores: 5
    • 2010 January 8
      Meredith permalink

      See, and when I used this logic with my boyfriend, he didn’t find it brilliant in the least!!!

      Adores: 6
    • 2010 January 8
      Bianchi Sound permalink

      Stephanie, are you sure you only have one cat? Did you double check your Cat Math? You may actually have 4-6.

      Or spinach toothpaste.

      Adores: 12
      • 2010 January 8
        Stephanie permalink

        I have double and triple checked my cat math. I also checked the cat. He claims there’s only one of him. I’m not so sure I trust him, tho. I mean, he is a cat.

        Adores: 5
        • 2010 January 8
          Hypno-cat permalink

          Trust you cat…. Trust your cat….

          Adores: 6
    • 2010 January 9
      Windrose permalink

      What’s the point of having only one parrot? Or only one canary? Or only one love bird! This may actually be how I got involved with nearly 100 birds. Hmmm.

      Adores: 1
  14. 2010 January 8
    Kate permalink

    Personally, I’d go with The Weasel and Bee rather than the other way ’round. If you say it that way with various English accents, the name takes on a life of its own and seems to become an entirely different word altogether, which is what all British proper nouns seem to aspire to do anyway.

    Adores: 0
  15. 2010 January 8
    sarajean80 permalink

    Oh, I’ve got one! You could have a pub called the Elephant and Weasel,and then put in a daycare center (for those pathetic enough to take their children into a bar) and call it the Heffalump and Woozle.

    Adores: 14
  16. 2010 January 8

    Heffalump Woozle <<<< I nominate that for today's band-of-the-day name.

    Is anyone keeping a list?

    Adores: 1
  17. 2010 January 8

    I post a comment, it doesn’t show up. I re-post it, same thing. I re-word it, and again..

    *Pouting, she wonders WTF is going on*

    You know what’ll happen, don’t you? There’s suddenly going to be a plethora of duplicate comments from me show up on here.

    Can I plead frozen brain cells? In lieu of that, can I nominate “Frozen Brain Cells” as yet another band name?

    And, for added points, the existential question…why post your comments just once? I mean, seriously, what is the point?

    Adores: 1
    • 2010 January 8

      I see two or three other comments from you on this thread. Try clearing your cache and refreshing.

      Adores: 0
      • 2010 January 8

        Thanks, Graham, but that didn’t help. I had been trying to post the same comment, repeatedly, and it never showed up.

        Weird.

        Anyway, I was trying to nominate Heffalump Woozle as a band name…and wondering if anyone was keeping a list.

        Sigh…it’s lost it’s ‘umph’ in translation now.

        Adores: 0
        • 2010 January 8

          There’s a list over in the forums CJ

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 January 8
          sarajean80 permalink

          There’s a list over in the forums of possible band names. Maybe we should start one of faux-English pub names, too.

          (EDIT: You beat me to it, Dev. I’m going to start the pub name list, though.)

          I had a couple of posts vanish on me the other day, I never did figure out what went wrong and there wasn’t a sudden influx of comments from me, so your deathless prose may have been eaten by the internet.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 January 8

          great idea sarajean, go for it.

          Add that link I posted too, then we can check if anyone’s cheating and using real ones. Not that anyone here would stoop so low of course *cough*

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 January 8

          For some reason the spam filter occasionally gets overexcited and starts flagging things as questionable. Most often it happens if there are links in the posts, but sometimes I can’t figure out why it flags them.

          Adores: 0
  18. 2010 January 8
    Depresyy permalink

    Depressy eat CJ posts. Nom nom nom.

    Adores: 2
  19. 2010 January 8
    queensbee permalink

    what IS the point of only haveing one? i just dont know. really, i dont know. but i shall return to writing my 30 year old unfinished dissertation. this has motivated me.
    and i still like frog and toad as an english pub. or was that frog and peach? or toad and peach?

    Adores: 1
    • 2010 January 8

      Holy el Shatners. You invoked the names of Toad and Peach. Together. The italian plumbers Association will be on you like fat on a Wal-Mart customer.

      Adores: 11
      • 2010 January 9
        queensbee permalink

        well, i guess i’ve surely gone beyond the fringe…

        Adores: 1
      • 2010 January 9
        Lola permalink

        “on you like fat on a Wal-Mart customer”
        *makes note for future use*

        Adores: 2

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