YSaC, Vol. 584: Thank You! May I Have Another?
2010 February 21
WINDOWS DOUBLE PAIN – $50 (NW ####)
VARIOUS SIZES, 50, DOLLARS TAKES ALL. THREE ARE SLIDING. TWO ARE ROLL OUT. ###-###-####
On your knees, worm! You WILL buy my windows, AND you will suffer DOUBLE PAIN!
I have windows in VARIOUS SIZES! You must pay in DOLLARS! You will take ALL of them! I will use the number FIFTY for NO APPARENT REASON! THREE of the windows are SLIDING! Quick! Catch them before they escape! NOT FAST ENOUGH!
*THWACK*
Steve-O has PLEASED the Mistress of Window Pain with his submission.
My area is a bit more expensive. For 50, they won’t even inflict single pain. You might get a few knuckle whacks, but that’s about it.
There is one truth across the board, though: When it’s all done, they definately do roll out, without so much as a goodbye and a parting glance.
Hey Meredith, no fair undercutting the competition with free pain…
…yes, The FinalCountdown is indeed playing in my head now.
You’re welcome.
Dollars takes all. That makes cents.
“Tadpoles! Tadpoles is a winner!”
May I pass on the double pain? Please? I’m already in so much pain from this sciatica that I’m not sure I could endure double pain.
Dan is that a Not.A.Lion whip in the picture? Or an ostrimu whip? OMG, is that drmk? Is she about to inflict your daily dose of double pain?
If that was drmk, I have only one thing to say: ROWR!
Pah. Llamas don’t say ROWR, so using such a term to get their attention won’t work. ROWR is for communicating with a Not.A.Lion.
Speaking as a (more or less) happy Linux user, I agree: Windows is double pain.
Ha! You know, whenever I hear a computer joke now, instead of the ol’ “ba-dum-cha” cymbal smash, I hear in my head the ol Windows “You F#cked up” sound.
Jackie – Mac user here agrees.
Meredith – Love it.
He’s a scammer, trying to sell Windows 5
Not worth $50 even with the new sliding and rollout features!
Linux is great until Wine won’t run the software you need for work… 🙁
Unfortunately, I’m still forced to use Windows at work. It bluescreens shortly after startup, Every. Single. Day. We have tried to troubleshoot it ourselves; we have called in techs from our software vendors, all to no avail. The only thing left to do is get new hardware and upgrade from Vista to Windows 7.
ooh, does this mean that i might not actually have passion-fingers and it really is all the fault of Windows Vista? Please, please tell my husband that.
Vista sucks. I have it on my laptop; it makes me cry.
As a happy Windows user who experiments with Linux as long as he can stand it, I’ll have to disagree with you.
But I think what the OP is selling is, in fact, a rare copy of a Windows Me release candidate. (The beta version was code-named “Windows Fatality,” whereas the final release is known within Microsoft as “Windows Flawless Victory,” as they got consumers and OEMs to pay money for virtually nothing.)
Well, Me and Vists did soemthing not the entire MS marketing department could do: Get people to want to buy XP
Graduated pain. You start out easy with just a slider. Next is a medium slider and roll out. Then, to double your pain, it’s the full size slider and roll out.
For dollars you and your closest 49 friends can have your own BDSM orgy.
That whip looks a bit like a piece of metal rebar. I’m less afeared of Mistress Brooke’s dominatrix aspect than the fact that it looks like she’s bending it with her bare hands. 🙁
“I must break you”
Mistress Brooke? I don’t even remember where I swiped that picture from… do you know something we don’t?
And I suspect that’s actually a riding crop, which tend to be quite bendy, so they don’t hurt the horse. [/corey]
No, she just looks like (I don’t know how I know this, don’t want to know how) Brooke Hogan, only with human-shade tan and better dressed. I think that for BH a dom job would be a step up in respectability.
I suspect you’re right and that it is likely a riding crop, but rebar was my first, uncaffeinated impression.
“I don’t even remember where I swiped that picture from”
So, Dan, you’ve been pirating for so long you don’t even keep track of your booty? 8)
I have a feeling HHNF will be very pleased by your visual aid today.
I think when it comes to pretty girlies, we can ALL appreciate, Graham.
I’m not saying a single word about a totally inappropriate RP story called For the Potion Master’s Amusement. That would be crossing the line. And make me look totally perverted and n3rdc0r3. Do NOT Google it.
Sweet Merlin’s Ghost what the hell was that??!!
I told you not to. That is my legal waiver. I am not responsible for any therapy and/or corruption and nightmares.
Don’t look now, Graham, but we’re infamous on YouTube now.
http://www.youtube.com/user/ostrimu
Holy… that was bloody brilliant. Well done, everyone involved. And not just because you flashed my avatar. 🙂
And, I think we’re almost at the room threshold.
‘Ello, folks!
-Sprints away being chased by a massive mob of fans-
Just checking in. Vacation ends in half an hour, and I haven’t slept.. How are the YSACers (don’t even QUESTION that) doing lately?
Igor! Hi! Bye! Come again sometime!
In Soviet Russia, a massive mob of fans sprints away from you!
Given the state of the US economy, I don’t think the dollar is taking anything, much less ALL.
@dan; i concur; it’s a riding crop, and she’s covering the handle and the loop with her hands. /corey
but this is discount pain, something no quality mistress would be associated with. unless this is not windows but linux, in which case there is minimal pain and zero cost.
ah. this is just all kinds of wrong.
Yes! I am on the board for submissions. Additionally, if all I have to do is take some windows to spend some time with the mistress in the picture, sign me up. My safe word is “drywall” and I have a moderate tolerance. Yes ma’am!
Steve, how much can I pay you to install the windows? Mine are crap. And you don’t need a safeword. 😀
Also, you can hang out and watch “Belle de Jour” after – also for free. 😉
Well, people have actually paid me to install both windows and glazing units.
But, I remain pretty ezpensive (as I hear all too often) especially with the surcharges for travel and all.
I don’t think I need any windows right now. In fact, I am more or less totally glazed over.
When will my mental alacrity return? Probably when I stop taking these vicodins…
Do get well soon, Isaac. I miss my regular reality checks where I realize that I am nowhere near as intelligent as I think I am because I end up looking up half the words you use. 🙂
even telepaths need safewords : >
Shoot, any excuse to get back to the east side of the country would do, and see all the mates from my youth. And “Belle du Jour?” Well how could I pass up that opportunity to lust after Catherine Deneuve?
Steve-O Yes! I am on the board for submissions
Was your choice of words deliberate, given the context here?
On the board? would that be a St. Andrew’s Cross?
A “50” for $50 is a much better deal then the “16” I recently purchased for $35.
Who is this “Dollars” character?
Do they take all?
Do they gravitate to donuts, as is often alleged?
Windows = Pain = true; but, having gone through NT; NT 4.x; NT 5.x; 2000 Server & 2000 Client; and all 16 versions of Vista, it’s more than a “twin” pain for me . . .
Eek, parsed that again.
This is another alternate-universe posting, having leaked from the 7th dimension to ours.
Consider.
Various sizes. How many? 50.
But, three are sliding and two are roll-out. So, either there are 45 unspecified, or, an alternate spatial dimension allows 5 units to have 50 sizes.
[corey]As a person in the AEC trade, I have to wonder if the “roll outs” are casement units, or what. Or, if this guy has found some “architectural salvage” in the form of removed “patio doors.” There is an odd, niche, small, usually frustrated, trade in former patio doors. The key problem with success being in just how easy it is to have the seal on patio door glazing fail, leaving you with an unwieldy bit of recyclables.[/corey]
It’s more cat math.
Oh, that’s so old-fashioned to call them “worm” when you’re giving your instructions!! Noone says that anymore! 🙂
Stephanie! I have to punch your card early today because I am going to the movies soon. 8) Happy Punch, bringing you up to 2.5!
Hi folks,
flying visit I’m afraid, no time even to have a read and catch up. As I think I mentioned already I’m going away tomorrow and have had a mad week trying to get things organised for the trip.
I’ll be back on saturday though, so will hopefully see you all then for a proper catch up.
Pack your waders, don’t talk to strangers, and pin your money to the inside of your undies. Have a good time, dear. MUAH!
Psst. She means pack your Wellies, Dev. Have fun! MUAH!
Son, I am confuse.
I have tried to stay vewwy vewwy quiet today, since there is absolutely nothing I can say that would be appropriate for mixed company in any way. You guys are making it vewwy vewwy difficult.
Don’t forget, there’s the forums!
And you have a room there. 8)
*converts to dungeon*
*converts to dungeon*
Serach for dice for Reality Check roll . . .
I was suprised I didn’t get a bite from you on my first comment HHNF.
Haven’t had my shots yet. Graham’s absence was due to rabies and a bad bout of cooties, not moving to Cali.
People can still get cooties? That’s it, I’m not moving back west, ever, if that’s the case. 🙁
Awww, you people are mean with your Windows bashing jokes. For your information, Windows is the only thing that will run my video games! Macs won’t. Can’t afford an Xbox, PS3, or anything else. It’s cheaper to spring for the occasional upgrade (which I haven’t needed in about three years, I might add, other than a bigger hard drive a year ago) than to spend $70 per game for a $350 system.
*peers over little red wire-rim glasses and sniffs* Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going back to Mass Effect 2 to be completely badass.
Don’t feel bad Steph, I still use a Windows PC, it just makes sense for those of us without the cash for a Mac or the skills to build a Linux box.
I catch hell for it all the time, being married to a network security admin, but hey, I use firefox, that should count for something, right?
I have only ever used Windows, and so far I have yet to suffer double pain (single pain perhaps, but never double pain). I would love a Mac, but simply because they are pretty to look at. Which isn’t enough to justify the extra price tag 🙁
On another note, I suddenly had images of a rebar-wielding dominatrix glowering at me while “the final countdown” played in the background…scary scary combination….
Double Pain – of a varied size!
Double Pain – dollars maximize!
Windows! ROLL OUT!
(You have to put extra emphasis on ‘ble’.)
I’m late to the party, but I can’t believe no one saw this, and I couldn’t let it go unsaid.