YSaC, Vol 923: Surely you’re joking, Mr. Eames!
Boy, science really is making progress these days. Time was, you only had a few basic particles. You had your rocks, and then you had your bigger rocks.
Then, the Greeks came along, and you got atoms. Also, yummy tzatziki sauce. mmm.. atoms in tzatziki sauce.
Then we had a bit of a hiatus in the middle ages, until Lavosier came along in the 1700s and identified that there are certain substances that cannot be broken down into different parts. We call these “elements”, like gold, molybdenum, or wonderflonium.
Then in 1897, the floodgates started to open. “Jimmy” J.J. Thomson discovered not only the electron, but also his catch phrase, “Dyn-o-mite”. (Dynamite itself was discovered by Alfred Nobel in 1867, who as we all know went on to establish the Pulitzer Prize.)
From there, you got just MOUNTAINS of particles, including, the proton, the neutron, the muon antineutrino, the W+ boson (who is responsible for the rigging and the sails) and those little black and orange bits you have on your fingers after you scarf down a bag of Doritos.
But finally, finally, the standard model is complete. Turn off the Large Hadron Collider – we’ve found this:
phooton – $45
This is a wood with blue pad phooton.both sides have magazine holders and the arm rest have doors that flip up so u can store stuff in them. Any questions call or text me at ###-###-####
I’m sure there will be LOTS of questions. The phone will be ringing off the hook, and soon this person will have to go to Stockholm so they can accept their Newberry award.
Thanks for the post, Wendy!