YSaC, Vol. 926: I hope we passed the audition.
2011 February 17
THE RELL INTUITVE PSYCHIC MASTER
HELLO IM JOJO IM THE RELL INTUITVE PSYCHIC LAET ME TALL YOU WHAT I DO
LOVE REUNITING LOVED ONES HEALINGSOF THE MIND BODY & SPIRIT
REMOVEING ALL BALK MAGIC & EVIL ALL TYPES OF READINGS & RITUALS & LOVE SPELLS & MORE,
CALL FOR YOUR NEW LIFE FOR A NEW YOU ALL READINGS AER $ 70 & IF YOU NEED SUMTHING DUN $200 & UP
WEE DO PAYMENT PLANS CALL IF YOU WANT IT DUN xxx xxx xxxx IF YOU DONT NEED ME DONT CALL
What is it with psychics and capital letters?
Jojo was a man who thought he was a psychic
Thought he wasn’t just a man
Jojo put an ad into his local Craigslist
Advertising payment plans
Give up, Jojo!
Thanks for the ad, Beth!
If you don’t need medicine, don’t take any.
If you don’t want a job, don’t work.
If you don’t need to eat, don’t consume food.
That will be $70 please.
If your phone’s not ringing, then it’s me not calling.
That’ll be….thinks real hard, whilst pressing index finger to temple and squinting….there, you get that?
Wait, what are you going to go with a bag of prunes and a Dachshund?
I’m kinda curious as to what she’s going to use the forty feet of HDMI cable for.
Honey, how many times have I told you…you’ve got to remove the tinfoil beanie before I talk to you!
Can I keep the bunny ears on?
They improve my reception and make me feel special.
I’ve got a Hyundai that had some balk magic put on it.
Put it on the payment plan, please.
How much would you charge me to channel some of my favorite English teachers?
Oh, hey, take my favorite English teacher, too. He’s a black belt in Snark-Fu.
Dear Jojo,
I can look into the future, too.
Change your name to something that doesn’t sound like a stripper’s.
Learn to spell (not that kind, the kind that involves letters in correct places).
Learn to use punctuation, too.
Learn to use the shift key.
If you do these things, we won’t make fun of you in the future (not on this site, anyway).
I need something done (note spelling), so I’ll charge you $200 for this advice. 8)
I find it wonderfully ironic that “spells” is one of the only words correctly written in the whole ad.
I still love you, Lola!
You again!?!
Perhaps you have a compass malfunction. I’m thinking that this is the L-O-L-A your seek:
I met her in a club down in old Soho
where you drink champagne and it tastes just like Cherry Cola
C-O-L-A Cola.
She walked up to me and she asked me to dance.
I asked her her name and in a dark brown voice she said, “Lola”
L-O-L-A Lola, lo lo lo Lola
Well, I’m not the world’s most physical guy,
but when she squeesed me tight she nearly broke my spine
Oh my Lola, lo lo lo Lola, lo lo lo Lola
Well, I’m not dumb but I can’t understand
why she walks like a woman and talks like a man
Oh my Lola, lo lo lo Lola, lo lo lo Lola
Well, we drank champagne and danced all night,
under electric candlelight,
she picked me up and sat me on her knee,
She said, “Little boy won’t you come home with me?”
Well, I’m not the world’s most passionate guy,
but when I looked in her eyes,
I almost fell for my Lola,
Lo lo lo Lola, lo lo lo Lola
I pushed her away. I walked to the door.
I fell to the floor. I got down on my knees.
I looked at her, and she at me.
Well that’s the way that I want it to stay.
I always want it to be that way for my Lola.
Lo lo lo Lola.
Girls will be boys, and boys will be girls.
It’s a mixed up, muddled up, shook up world,
except for Lola. Lo lo lo Lola. Lo lo lo Lola.
Well I left home just a week ago,
and I never ever kissed a woman before,
Lola smiled and took me by the hand,
she said, “Little boy, gonna make you a man.”
Well I’m not the world’s most masculine man,
but I know what I am and that I’m a man,
so is Lola.
Lo lo lo Lola. Lo lo lo Lola.
Note: This Lola is Not.a.man.
Thank you, that is all. As you were, then.
Maybe it’s this Lola he loves.
Or maybe this one.
Nah, couldn’t be.
Never thought you were. Just saying your stalker’s “compass” has taken a wrong turn……..
I have always loved the last lines to “Lola”. I think the double meaning is so clever, so I hope you don’t mind my correction, CoffDrop:
“But I know what I am and I’m glad I’m a man,
And so is Lola”
This post was posted in the wrong place. I am such a goof!
Ita vero!
Question…how many psychics win the lottery?
All of the winners are psychic, they just don’t like to brag about it. It’s a conspiracy.
Psychics don’t play the lottery, they prefer more of a challenge. That’s why they always have little shops that barely make any money… or sometimes big TV shows that don’t earn them any respect.
Yeah, psychics are like teachers in that way. They don’t do it for the money or the glory, they do it for the self-fulfillment knowing that they’ve really helped somebody.
And for the love of psychicing, of course.
Years ago, I did fund raising (aka telemarketing). We had a list of names and the type of business they were in. There was the occasional psychic listed and I wanted one to answer so I could say “You should know why I am calling. What is your answer?” or something snarky like that. Unfortunately, every single one was a disconnected number. Hmmm….maybe they did know I would be calling and why.
I think I talked to him, he works the help desk over at Turbo Tax.
I see what you did there…
Pretty intuitive…
Hey, Jojo, given that I wouldn’t know if I’ve got any balk magic hanging over me, howzabout you call me if I need you.
I’m sure you can intuit my number, right?
I’m under the impression that this entire add is really just a cover-up for JoJo’s secret hit-man business. I have the feeling if you were to call JoJo, he/she/it would answer the phone with a thick mob accent and ask you ‘Whatcha need? Oh, dat, I’ll jus’ send Joey. He’ll get dat dun for ya, bada-bing.”
My cousin Tony came over from Italy so I took him to the Olive Garden!
Does he still speak to you?
For that, I love you, Lola.
In a totally non-threatening girl crush way, of course.
Looks like you have another stalker, Lola.
Nah, girl crushes are not stalking (I don’t think). But if you are stalking me, Christina, bring Italian food. 8)
Also, my fan doesn’t appear to stalk either, which is fine.
Oh, I seriously doubt you’ve done any sort of reading at all, JoJo the Spark-faced Boy.
And no, the audiobook version of Twilight doesn’t count.
Ok class, turn to page 237 in your book “Sparkles the Magical Pyscic Maestar.”
no it’s “EVIL ALL TYPES OF READINGS ” As in, he thinks all types of reading is (are?) evil and avoids it… which explains so much.
EVIL ALL THE READINGS!
RAWR! BOOKS BAD! BALK MAGIC!
HULKMOUSE SMASH WITH UNBUBLER!IT SUPER EFFECTIVE!
Silva – I got my CatMath hoodie today and it’s beyond adorable. I love all the little details.
OT: Okay, I have a “I’m new to the forum” question! What’s the code for inserting the quote?
blockquote with these arrows “<" on either end (going each direction)at the front of the quote
/blockquote with these arrows "<"on either end at the back of the quote
I bookmarked a XHTML tutorial site specifically for YSaC.
Incidentally, VERY hard to describe how to do XHMTL without actually coding your own comment.
http://www.webpelican.com/web-tutorials/xhtml-1-1-tutorial/
Thanks! Much appreciated.
I prefer to use this one:
http://www.yourhtmlsource.com/
Now if only I could sit myself down and force me to learn CSS…
~~**these are the codes you will be learning**~~
I’d rather get my psychic advice from Mojo Jojo.
I’d rather get mine from a fortune cookie:
1. It’s sure to be at least as accurate.
2. I’ll have had a good meal.
3. I may even learn a word in Chinese.
Plus a fortune cookie gives you your lucky numbers for winning the lottery! Already one step up from the standard psychic!
And you get a cookie! Most psychics don’t come with a dessert.
4. …in bed.
[bad MojoJojo impression] you will meet a tall, dark stranger…. a person you have not previously known who has great stature and is not short and who’s hair is not light in color, this is who you will encounter. muahaha. [ /bad MojoJojo impression]
Does the redundancy cost extra?
There is only one Mojojojo and it is I who is the only Mojojojo that is me, the only Mojojojo of which there is only one, you cannot be the Mojojojo for I am the Mojojojo of which there is only one.
Say that ten times fast and I’ll give you a shiny new nickel.
That.That.That.That.That.That.That.That.That.That.
*thinks real hard, presses temple with forefinger, squints*
I just sent you my address over the psychic intuitve network.
*goes outside to wait by mailbox*
I just KNEW someone would do that.
:puts nickel in computer drink holder and pushes close:
Oooh… Pretty sparkles.
Thank you for running with that, Silva. I wanted to do a bad Mojo Jojo prediction but I didn’t have time. Yours is awesome!
*Walks off a cliff*
Alright, who’s the smartass that removed my balk?
“Removing the balk”
Euphemism of the day.
Oh, He’ll TALL me. I’m not too short, but being a little taller would be nice.
I wish someone would TALL me. I’d like my feet to reach the floor when I sit on the bus and to be able to hold onto the straps when I don’t have a seat on said bus.
I’m with you, Kelli. When purchasing furniture a few years ago I looked like Edith Ann on every couch/chair/loveseat I sat on in the store.
My sister, though, has it really bad…she’s only 4’10″…nothing fits her.
At 5’3″, I’d very much like someone to TALL me.
You still have a few growing years left, so there’s hope.
So let’s see…a seraphim…a wizard…oh, look, it’s a jabberwocky!
That just made my day.
Does your blade go snicker snack?
Mine doesn’t as much as it used to.
You need more gyring, less gimbling.
You made me chortle in my joy.
I’d love to stay and read more, but ’tis brillig.
…and the slithy toves…
Shush you guys! You’re making it all mimsy in here…
And the mome rath just outgrabe, can someone clean that up?
I’ll get it. I can cook it up on the disco wok.
In Soviet Russia, poltergeist exorcise you!
Also…
Look at the nose on that fish!
maybe it’s lack of sleep, but it’s set me into a fit of giggles.
The saddest part of the ad is that he spelled “angels” correctly.
It’s so depressing that once again I can’t make any geometry jokes.
I think that’s part of the image he
stoleprocured from somewhere, so he didn’t actually have a chance to get it wrong.JoJo: “Waelcome child to the Rell Psychic Intuitve Friends network.”
Caller: “Hi, my name is Bill–”
JoJo: “Yes, I know you are Bill, we are rell psychics.”
Bill: “Uh … yeah. Wait, ‘rell?'”
JoJo: “Rell.”
Bill: “What does that mean?”
JoJo: “Rell. As opposed to feak.”
Bill: “Fea– you know what, never mind. Fine, okay, so if you know who I am, why am I calling?”
JoJo: “I sense … I sense … a disturbance. Yes, a great disturbance.”
Bill: “Yeah, and?”
JoJo: “It’s as if a million tiny voices cried out and were suddenly silenced.”
Bill: “Yeah, I’m having my house tented. Goddamn roaches.”
JoJo: “No, no … that’s not it. Smaller … smaller voices …”
Bill: “Uh … I’ve got … I’ve got fleas …”
JoJo: “No, not that, either. It’s … wait … wait, are you … are you masturbating?”
Bill: <several moments of silence> “Uh … I was.”
JoJo: “Are you finished?”
Bill: “No, I’m American.”
JoJo: “No, I meant, are you done?”
Bill: “Oh. Yeah, uh, I’m done now.”
JoJo: “Good. Now, I see … I see someone close to you. Someone very close. You are upset by them.”
Bill: “Yeah, so? I’m sure everyone’s got someone like that in their lives.”
JoJo: “This one is special.”
Bill: “So’s the chili at Mac’s Diner.”
JoJo: “I see a B … a B … Buh … Buuuh … Buuuuuhrendaaaaa … Brenda, is there someone named Brenda close to you?”
Bill: “Nope.”
JoJo: “It’s definitely B … Beeee … Buuuuuuh … Buuuuuuuuill — Bill!”
Bill: “Yeah?”
JoJo: “Someone named Bill?”
Bill: “Yeah, me!”
JoJo: “I mean someone else — a female, perhaps, named Billie?”
Bill: “Oh. Yeah, no.”
JoJo: “Bob?”
Bill: “Nope.”
JoJo: “Burk?”
Bill: “Nope.”
JoJo: “Borg, Bessie, Bapes, Belinda, Bucky, Buick?”
Bill: “Nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, yep.”
JoJo: “Yes? Bucky?”
Bill: “Yes, Buick.”
JoJo: “That must be him, I sense you are troubled by Buick, he has hurt you in some way. Emotionally.”
Bill: “He don’t work no more.”
JoJo: “So he is hurting hurting you financially because he has no income.”
Bill: “If you wanna put it that way. Buick’s my car. It’s broke down.”
JoJo: <heavy sigh> “Brad?”
Bill: “Nope.”
JoJo: “Brett?”
Bill: “Nope.”
JoJo: “Brie, Brianna, Brioche, Brooch, Brody, Brooke, Broomhandle, Brawny, Breakfast, Balki, Bikini, Banala, Banana, banna fo fanna, Bajeezus, Bucolic–”
Bill: “You’re just readin’ things out of a dictionary now, aren’t you?”
JoJo: “I am certainly not!”
Bill: “You don’t know the answer, do you?”
JoJo: “It will come to me.”
Bill: “You want me to tell you?”
JoJo: “Fine.”
Bill: “It’s Brenda.”
JoJo: <several moments of silence> “But … that’s the first name I said!”
Bill: “Yep!”
JoJo: “You lied!”
Bill: “Yeah, but if you were really psychic you would’ve known that, wouldn’t you?”
JoJo: “I’m going to put a curse on you, now.”
Bill: “Woo. I’m real afeared, now.”
JoJo: “I’m going to use balk magic.”
Bill: “WoooOOoooOOooOOoo!”
JoJo: “It doesn’t seem to want to work right now, but I promise you, when I can get it to work, you will be cursed within a inch of your life!”
Bill: “Fantastic!”
JoJo: “That’ll be $29.95. Your credit card has already been billed.”
Bill: “CRAP!”
“JoJo: “Are you finished?”
Bill: “No, I’m American.”
Spit-take.
Was time for a new monitor anyways.
*quietly laughs self into near-incontinence*
That was my favorite part, too.
Ditto…and ditto the quiet near-incontinence. Ima get caught one of these days.
Bravo, Smiley Puppy, a brazillian doors.
@Minefield, awesome! Why don’t I read comment section more often?
I don’t know, but it’s easily rectified. Pull up a chair, have a slice of coffee (or a cherry danish, new in box) and jump in, the snark is fine! Also, I sometimes mix metaphors.
Make mine a double.
wait, a balk curse?
Does that mean the runner advances to first?
Wee! Wee! Wee! Jojo’s right, payment plans are lots of fun! Wee!
Is that what the kids are calling it these days?
My co-workers are always talking about refinancing their loans. I think that kind of talk in pubic is disgusting.
Yes, yes it is.
That is a definition of “casual work enviroment” that I am not familiar with.
“ALL READINGS AER $70”
According to W’pedia AER = Annual Equivalent Rate so with Sparky’s payment plan this AER of $70 and compound interest of twenty-seven kibbles my catulator works out that a simple “love reuniting” spell will cost around $75 trillion, trillion per half year (or the amount recently paid to all the world’s bankers)
A cold feeling of dread gripped Jojo’s left kidney as the alarm went off again. It had been going off more often lately, and that could only mean one thing:
Balk magic was on the rise.
Jojo grabbed his coat, his psychic amplifimication crystal, and his homeopathetic balk magic absorption rutabaga. It was going to be another long day fighting the forces of drakness.
He bustled into the main office with his equipment, and the tools he’d need as well, “Bacontini, what do we have?”
“Dere is de alarm sounding for sector twelve. Dere appears to be a gohst terrorizing de people dere, even de ladies. Dey are calling for you; you want Bacontini to help?”
Jojo sighed, another gohst. The giant slug-like creatures were popping up all over the city. They would eat just about anything, and were difficult to banish to the drak dimension given their size and the amount of magical balk protection slime they excreted. Jojo knew he’d need a shower and a stiff drink when he got back.
“No, Bacontini, stay here and work the phones, I can take out a gohst by myself. Just make sure there is a neat scotch waiting for me when I get back.”
Bacontini looked hurt, “You no want de Bacontini? But he here for you!”
“Damn it, Bacontini, I don’t have time for your insecurity. We’ll talk about this later!” And with that Jojo was out the door. Bacontini was a nice and able enough secretary, but he was really needy. For all his talk of the ladies, Jojo couldn’t recall that he’d ever seen Bacontini actually with a lady; despite claims that he was married and had some children. Not that it was any of Jojo’s business.
The vamiper that attacked Jojo as he walked out the front door took him entirely off guard. It was only dumb luck that Jojo’s magical pyschik rubber chicken protective charm absorbed most of the attack. Even so, the blast of balk magical enregie blew Jojo nearly a block down the street.
Jojo quickly pulled himself back onto his feet and squared himself off against the small abomination. Looking much like a pygmy cross between a platypus and a 1967 Buick Skylark, the evil creature was one of the most dangerous of the balk magical demons.
Jojo unsheathed his rutabaga as the creature raised a fender and began chanting. It was going to be a long day.
Sheesh, it’s like a cracked-up Sparkicized version of the Dresden Files, with Bob the Skull replaced by a YSAC in-joke.
Twistedly brillig.
THIS. ADORE. Plus, ‘unsheathing the rutabaga’ gets my vote for euphemism of the day. 🙂
That, or it’s every manga ever written run through a blender, then transcribed into mayan then into esperanto and the Googletranslated into english using a 1st generation phone autocorrect T9 feature.
But, the few, the unliky phew human svrivots barvley masshed agin the psychobotpiresparkmedia, the males in cool aromor and long lether koats; the wimmins in torn, see-through t0shirts and thongs (on the pelvis, but sometimes in theyire’re haerts, to). Swordplay, lazers, public bathing, teenaged-concepts of sexy, space battles; heros beet villans, The End.
I was curious to see where this originated, so I googled it. Apparently JoJo has multiple personality disorder. He pops up as MoMo in Hawaii, Anna in Las Vegas, Sabrina in Alaska, and at least one other that got removed while I was searching (Amanda, where are you from?). Each personality promises similar things like reuniting loved ones. MoMo from Hawaii has the best ability of them all – he (she?) “REMOVES ALL BAD LUCK & EVEIL & DORKNAS “. That’s good, because the dorknas that have been harassing me are really driving me bonkers. If MoMo can’t take care of them, I might just have to go all rughspleh on their dwersks and stuff. But it’s ok, because I hear ground dorkna phlersmio has a million and one uses.
Found the Hawaii one, here’s the whole text;
And it looks like Anna MoMoJoJo is a “voodoo master & psychic” in Bloomington,IL
“sex teps”?
Even if you were getting good advice, would you be able to understand what they were writing?
That’s probably where the “FOR A BATER TOMORRO” comes in.
So you’re saying the Sex teps are for a ‘bater tomorro?
Why not today?
… I’ll get my coat.
are these homosexual cassette teps?
What the hell is “HALLT LOVE”?? A love of Tom T. Hall? Yes, if that’s it you may need some psychic intervention.
The gator-crested dorknas is one of the most common, yet curiously least studied mammals in the animal kingdom. While sightings are plentiful, they have the unusual ability to be intensely ignored by those around them. They are most often seen during mating season attempting to catch the attention of females who generally want nothing to do with them. They have no mating calls of their own, but have adapted in the wild to co-opt the obsolete mating calls of other erstwhile members of their genus who have since evolved to use more effective calls. Here’s one now:
Huuuuruh. Hurrrrruh. Hurrrruh hurruh huruh huruh huurrraHEY, your legs must be tired because you’ve been running around my mind all day!
…and another…
Hurrrrruh. Hurrrruh hurruh huruh huruh thahara thhHHAT must be jelly, ‘cos jam don’t shake like that!
It is a curiosity of the animal kingdom that a mammal with such ineffective mating calls still manage to perpetuate the species successfully enough to keep their population levels high. It is generally thought among zoologists that the dorknas spends the beginning of its mature life trying to court females of significantly higher status as a means to improve their genepool. However, as it is rare for most dorknas to succeed, they spend the rest of their life lowering their standards with each successive attempt until they finally manage to find a willing mate of sufficiently low social standing and produce offspring…
You know….this got me to thinking…which is rare, I know…
Freaky Puppy – if/when you do get around to launching the
thithtersister site to YSaC, you are going to need to include an encyclopedia of CL critters, complete with descriptions, habitats, etc…oooh…and pictures. Lots of pictures.You just keep your hands the hell off my dorkmas, Momo.
Does Dorkmas come before or after Beesmas?
Dorkmas is the high holiday for Noids. Everyone gets a new pocket protector.
I have heard an unconfirmed rumor it’s the same day as Bill Gates’ birthday.
I maintain that Dorkmas is no longer a religious holiday in our consumerist society. And anyway, our modern traditions have nothing to do with the Llama-Nun any more, they’re all derived from the pagan festival of Pedantialia, to honor the Roman god Pedanticus.
I think I worked for Pedanticus …
Wow… You are old…
*Runs for it*
While removeing all balk magic & evil, he removed spell check which means that he probably doesn’t really love the ritual of reading.
SPEL CHACK IS EAVIL VODOO!
It’s the Debbil!!!!
But the Littel Debbil iz okae. She maeks nyce kookys.
Ib Littel Debbil ated hur one kookys shebe Big Debbil.
Zomg, I just reelized that teh JoJo is almostses uzing teh LOLcat speex. Mebbe JoJo is a LOL kitteh.
I think he’s just grossly ignorant of what spell check is and does.
This is the conversation that goes on inside this one person’s head.
“MoMo? Hey MoMo!? Yo, MoMo!! Would you stop harassing that dorkna and listen!?”
“Oh, sorry Anna, it’s just this one’s really cute. What do you want?”
“Me and JoJo is writing up this week’s psycho ad and we was wondering why all them pretty lines show up. Do you know what they mean?”
“No, but Amanda and me was wondering the same thing last week. I thought maybe my computer was possessed, so I called Sabrina, but because of the time change she didn’t answer. I left a message, but she didn’t get me back in time. I just sent out the possessed message. Maybe that’s why Craig nor none of his internet friends didn’t call any of us.”
Now you understand of course, since all of these people live in one person’s head and that person can’t even spell “real” or “let me tell” correctly, this conversation took a whole morning. With each person waking up at 9:30 local time except for MoMo, who was still working on the previous night’s ganj, a question asked would bounce around like a racquetball in an empty court until somebody finally answered.
The hotel I used to work at was host many years to a psychic faire. One year, the organizer did not call the sales co-ordinator in time to book the room but had all ready taken out advertisements in the newspaper. He couldn’t find another venue in time, so he cancelled it outright with a notice in the local paper that said, “Psychic Faire Cancelled due to Unforseen circumstances.”
That is just … perfect.
From the ever-hilarious Stephen Wright:
“I had a psychic girlfriend once, but she left me before we met.”
And from my closet, a t-shirt that says:
My Career as a Psychic Was Cut Short Due to Unforseen Circumstances
And I had a customer, once, who, after an outage, asked me “What other unforeseen issues are we going to run into?”
Hmmm.. makes the brain hurt trying to figure them out.
Ha, in my former life as a waitron, I once had to tell people all night that we were out of the widely advertised ‘specialty’ as unforeseen circumstances (being the mother of all storms kicking up out of nowhere; even the Metservice was perplexed) had prevented a vital ingredient from being delivered. The number of people who said something along the lines of “Well shouldn’t you anticipate things like that?” made me stabby and sad, at the same time.
I’m surprised that my days in retail didn’t turn me into a psychopath. I wish there were sites like this, Not Always Right and Customers Suck around back in those days. (Well, in my earlier earlier days, just the internet would have been nice.) I halfway seriously though that there were (and still are) some people who are so utterly devoid of anything resembling an a sensible thought that humanity would be better served if they were all penned in an unused portion of the Yukon and left to graze, far enough away from thinking humanity that their cognitive free radicals didn’t damage the rest of us.
MF, we have a local forum for our community. In said forum a new business owner, a sole-proprietor and sole-operator business, wrote and asked about business hours.
She was quite specific that she could not afford additional help. And that she was already running ragged on a 7 day schedule as was.
About 2/3 of the respondents thought she ought to be open more hours and hire more help. Not one of which meant so ironically–such in utter, abject, and complete misunderstanding of the question.
Oh, and it’s a resale/repurpose shop, so the number of numbskulls who thought she should “just hire a temp” to go pick up stock were amusing in a make-a-person-stabbity sort of way.
Apparently, other than we few here, we happy few, the rest of the world in is Thames to the neck convinced the tides revolve around them. Aye, then, let them come forth, for I’d not slaughter any so base. Let me trick them of coins from their purse, that passport be made of them, and set to graze some far-off steppe in the ovine company of Basil’s innumerable.
[OT] I often feel stabby… Luckily, usually only when driving, and only when surrounded by drivers who have, collectively, one less brain cell than the total number of said drivers…[/OT]
Sounds like my commute.
“Balk! Balk! Balk! Balk!” – Psychic Chicken
If it’s balk majic, it must be a santeria chicken. Psychic santeria chickens never have a long career because they are always losing their heads over their work.
I knew you were going to say that.
Why is Psychic Chicken naked?
When is a psychic chicken NOT naked?
Maybe because naked psychic chicken is getting ready to lay some cherry floors?
Psychic Chicken
Qu’est-ce que c’est
Balk balk balk balk balk balk balk balk balk
PsychicChicken, just cross the road already. Don’t ask it, don’t ask it, don’t don’t don’t …
I have a… well Jojo should know. Wednesday never ends, does it?
Sometimes Wednesday is still going strong even when it’s well into Thursday afternoon. It’s been know to be called The Pit Bull of Weekdays.
I think you also do several other substances.
I was hoping Todd would show up since he’s in the box.
IF YOU DONT NEED ME DONT CALL.
To me this line says that he is a real psychic. You see he does not know what normal people can or cannot know. He knows that there are lots of things normal people can’t tell. So he made his ad as clear as possible for the normal people.
Ya know, after reading Jojo’s other ads and the LOLspeak comments that followed, I realized that these ads are written in an almost perfect vernacular of late night TV infomercial psychic, Miss Cleo.
[less snark than usual observation] On my way home tonight, I was listening to the BBC World Service recounting the shifting political tensions in North Africa and the Middle East, and how much the internet and cell phones have helped people unite for a common cause. Then I thought about all the ads that have been held up here, and it dawned on me. Humanity isn’t doomed so much as the US is doomed. What did the internet create for us in the political arena? Tea Baggers. I rest my case. [/end less snark observation]
Guess everyone’s already asleep. Oh well. Todd, you can’t hide from your Punchity Punch Punch!
G’Night, Bahrain!