YSaC, Vol. 1051: Won’t you tell us about those carpets, George?

2011 August 8

georges rug 5’3 x 7’9 – $40


this is a georges rug still in the bag it was left behind by my parents and it just doesent go with my house. I can be reached by e mail.

What if my name isn’t George? Can I still buy the rug?

Oh wait – I know! I’ll get a rabbit! And I will hug him and squeeze him and pat him and pet him and I will call him George. And then he can buy me this rug.

Thanks for the link, Amy!

66 Responses leave one →
  1. 2011 August 8

    Darn, I was looking for a Bobs rug. I guess I will have to keep looking.

    Adores: 5
  2. 2011 August 8
    Lola permalink

    George’s Fantasy rug?

    Pass. Just … I’ll pass on this one. I really, really don’t want to know. Patterns like that can hide a multitude of stains sins.

    Adores: 4
    • 2011 August 8
      funky monkey permalink

      I’m with you, Lola. Anything fabric (couches, rugs, mattresses) is scary to buy used. And that pattern looks like every bedspread on every motel I’ve stayed in for ten years. Blech.

      Adores: 1
      • 2011 August 8
        Lola permalink

        FM, I think my comment was influenced by a message just a few moments before from a friend who teaches junior high. Apparently their building janitor checked their classroom carpets (note: “back in my day” … linoleum was what we had and it still seems more practical than carpeting) with black light … and they are ALL getting new carpets because the biohazard “designs” were off the charts. EW.

        Adores: 7
        • 2011 August 8
          Lola permalink

          Also, FM, your “anything fabric” caveat in my area is must-t0-avoid in general with used furnishings not because of biohazard but because of bedbugs. Disgusting and itchy!

          Adores: 2
  3. 2011 August 8

    Damn it George, that’s it, we’re getting rid of your rug!

    Adores: 6
    • 2011 August 8
      LimeLolly permalink

      With George wrapped in it?

      :looks around:

      Who said that?

      Adores: 7
    • 2011 August 11
      NotMyName permalink

      *Kramer bursts in.*

      “Hey George, I’ll take that rug off your hands. It’ll go great with my Tony.”

      “I dunno Kramer…”

      “Come on! I’ll give ya five bucks for it!”

      “Alright..”

      *Kramer checks Jerry’s fridge.*

      “Mmmm, salami..hey Jerry mind if I-”

      “Take it.”

      Adores: 0
  4. 2011 August 8
    Indigo permalink

    Another in the famous “Left Behind” series. Definitely not an example of rapture.

    Adores: 6
  5. 2011 August 8

    Georges Braque designed this rug during an acid-induced fantasy. It was left behind by my parents in a house in Prince George’s County. It just doesn’t go with my house or any other house on earth.

    Adores: 2
    • 2011 August 8
      Irregular Fractal permalink

      But I hear it really ties the International Space Station together.

      Adores: 6
  6. 2011 August 8

    So… one of her parents is named George I guess. Seems a bit of trivial knowledge when trying to sell a rug, though.

    Adores: 2
    • 2011 August 8
      mudslicker permalink

      Tell me about the rabbits again…. 🙂

      Adores: 0
  7. 2011 August 8

    Hey, I recognize that rug! It’s from George’s Discount Carpets. You’d better buy it here because that store went out of business three times already.

    Adores: 10
    • 2011 August 8

      I got one at their third annual going-out-of-business sale. I can hardly wait until the fourth.

      Adores: 2
      • 2011 August 8

        Yes, George’s discount carpets! Only the finest machine woven carpets sold at the lowest prices! And now, at our going out of buisness sale, you can save even more!

        Yes, come to George’s Discount Carpets: going out of buisness for the last 10 years to save you money!

        Adores: 5
        • 2011 August 8
          Lola permalink

          Hey, it works for some people! Sub Pop Records in Seattle once had the slogan “Going out of business since 1988.” (Note: they are still around.)

          Adores: 2
        • 2011 August 8

          There was also that persian carpet store across from the Eliot Bay Book Company that had been going out of buisness for at least a decade. I think they eventually did go under, though.

          Adores: 2
        • 2011 August 8

          Had a rug place here that advertised going out of business over the course of many years. Their published discounts were 57% and 73%. *head tilt*

          Adores: 4
        • 2011 August 8
          funky monkey permalink

          (ot/TCB) Archie: Your question Friday re Hubby Monkey’s silicone/cortizone shots: His dr gave him the shots to try and repair his ruptured discs to take pressure off of nerves leading to his arm and shoulder. Dr said that if the pain went away (which it did) then the pressure on the nerves was relieved.

          Didn’t mean to ignore ya, Friday was busy.

          DONE!

          Adores: 2
        • 2011 August 8

          Np. Thanks for the info, FM. I figured you were up to important monkey business 🙂 Did that come out correctly?

          Adores: 1
        • 2011 August 8
          Windrose permalink

          FM, if you ever do a blog, you should call it Important Monkey Business. 8)

          Adores: 4
        • 2011 August 9
          funky monkey permalink

          *makes note of cool title*

          Do I have to give y’all royalties from this? 🙂

          Adores: 0
  8. 2011 August 8
    Windrose permalink

    The border only goes around three sides. Did somebody cut a rug? 8)

    Adores: 5
    • 2011 August 8
      Windrose permalink

      Wait, wait! How can we tell if the carpet matches the rug? LOL I crack myself up.

      Adores: 4
      • 2011 August 8
        Lola permalink

        That carpet matches no known drapes, I am guessing.

        Adores: 2
    • 2011 August 8

      Nah, it’s a hipster rug. They just think it’s ‘difforent’.
      Though in reality all of those modern hipster rugs do the same exact thing!

      Adores: 2
      • 2011 August 8

        So it’s covered in clove cigarette burns, PBR stains and has maxed out it’s parents credit cards?

        Adores: 3
        • 2011 August 8
          Lola permalink

          And its neighbors find it highly annoying, yes.

          Adores: 1
        • 2011 August 8
          Is.A.Manx permalink

          And smells bad?

          Adores: 0
        • 2011 August 8

          Ghostie – it is parents credit cards? Two wrong possessives in one sentence; have you been studying with Taco?

          Adores: 2
        • 2011 August 8

          The student has’ become the master…

          Adores: 4
        • 2011 August 8
          funky monkey permalink

          Why did that look like “the student has become the MINISTER”? It’s time to go back to the eye doctor. Or the shrink.

          Adores: 0
  9. 2011 August 8
    Windrose permalink

    Grampdaddy, here’s a new rug for the box. Enjoy!

    Adores: 4
    • 2011 August 8
      funky monkey permalink

      So not fair! You didn’t decorate the box when I was in there! Oh wait, I DID get to play with Taco’s thong. Cool, all’s good.

      Adores: 3
      • 2011 August 8

        You know, I’ve been thinking about upgrading to a new, better TacoThong. I could always leave the old one in the box for our daily chosen’s pleasure.

        Adores: 5
      • 2011 August 8
        funky monkey permalink

        Hey, an idea: We should all contribute something personal to the box to be displayed, like rock star memorabilia in restaurants. Grampdaddy could donate a cane, Ghostcat could give a hairball, Windrose a feather, and so on. What could I donate? What would say “Funky Monkey”? Hum….

        *rustles in cabinet*

        *mumbles to self*

        Old banana, last year’s calendar, sneakers from 10 years ago, ew, is that supposed to be green?

        I’ll study on it.

        Adores: 3
        • 2011 August 8
          Windrose permalink

          FM, you are FULL of good ideas! I can donate an entire fan made of feathers! Held together with guano. It’s all the rage in Europe.

          Adores: 1
        • 2011 August 8
          funky monkey permalink

          Tag it and throw it in, Windy! I’m still searching for that special something that says “me”.

          *rummage rummage cursing*

          An old sock with holes in it, hi-liters from college (graduated 15 years ago), jeans from 1997 (great GREAT year), pair of Hubby’s old OH MY GOD IT’S MOVING HELP ME JEEBUS!!!!

          *wham wham wham with shoe*

          Back to work. Whew.

          Old dot-matrix printer, paper for printer, rotary dial phone (yep, still got one)….

          This will take a while.

          Adores: 3
        • 2011 August 9
          SilvaNoir permalink

          I still have some clothes from 1998 (my personal favorite year)

          Adores: 0
  10. 2011 August 8

    Fantasy rug, aka dreamy merkin.

    Adores: 10
    • 2011 August 8
      Lola permalink

      Bad puppy!
      Here’s a treat. You earned it. 8)

      Adores: 3
  11. 2011 August 8
    Ralph permalink

    Spurious George.

    Adores: 4
  12. 2011 August 8
    ToBScholarly permalink

    George is the brand name for a certain mega-mart’s line of clothing. Although I am fairly certain this rug is too ugly even for them.

    Adores: 2
  13. 2011 August 8

    *Points*

    CJ’s advertising on YSaC! Whee!

    Adores: 2
    • 2011 August 8

      *blushes*

      Awww…shucks, Taco, thanks…

      Now, EVERYONE go read the blog…because, I’m evil and could probably track y’all down if it became necessary.

      Just sayin’…..

      Adores: 5
      • 2011 August 8

        The picture reminds me of the saying; “If you can’t say something nice, come sit by me.”

        Adores: 3
        • 2011 August 8
          funky monkey permalink

          Smedley! A”Steel Magnolia” quote! I think someone likes the chick flicks.

          Adores: 0
        • 2011 August 8

          I think it was Miss Lola’s hero Dorothy Parker that said it first. I could be mistaken.

          Adores: 1
        • 2011 August 8
          Dretak permalink

          [Corey] actually, the “if you can’t say something nice, come sit by me” quote is from Alice Roosevelt Longworth. She was pretty bad-ass. [/corey]

          Adores: 2
      • 2011 August 8

        CJ, your blog is wonderful splendiferous! And more fun to indulge in daily than my gummy bear vitamins. Probably will ensure I live longer, too. Yay!

        Adores: 1
      • 2011 August 8
        Windrose permalink

        I love the blog! Well, I only read the most current post, but it sure got me a-thinking. My new roommates are a mixed race couple. They apparently have received some flack from some places for it. Makes me so mad.

        Adores: 0
        • 2011 August 8
          funky monkey permalink

          I contributed some stories of backward-ness from good old Tennessee. Makes me mad AND sad. And embarrassed.

          Adores: 0
        • 2011 August 9

          Wow, y’all…thank you…no really, no snarkiness…just thank you.

          Adores: 0
  14. 2011 August 8

    Many doors for two Warner Bros. cartoon references nearly back to back.

    Adores: 1
  15. 2011 August 8

    “Doesent”

    Oh, good, some slutty deer has been rolling around on this carpet.

    Adores: 3
  16. 2011 August 8
    Is.A.Manx permalink

    Allow me to point out that I am a cat not in the bag.

    And will not respond to mail addressed “e”.

    But, would have to get up and flehmen female deer smell, though. [roll-over, blink, wash,wash]

    Adores: 2
  17. 2011 August 8
    big uncle john permalink

    Just talked to Peg (who is holding my hat for me) and she says that obviously, if its at the FRONT door it’s Matt, but at the BACK door, it must be George.

    Adores: 5
    • 2011 August 8
      Bianchi Sound permalink

      Matt: Liquor

      George: Poker

      Got it.

      Adores: 5
      • 2011 August 8
        LimeLolly permalink

        Congierge! I need a new keyboard! This one has been baptized with liquid.

        Adores: 5
        • 2011 August 8
          LimeLolly permalink

          *concierge*

          stupid spell check

          Adores: 0
        • 2011 August 8
          Windrose permalink

          Uhm, LL, are you always that dark?

          *this is my new favorite nonsense question*

          Adores: 2
        • 2011 August 8
          LimeLolly permalink

          What? We’re not in an energy blackout? WTH?

          I was making a ‘political statement’.

          It represents the state of my mind.

          It’s a picture of my dead computer’s innards.

          I’m starting a new avatar trend.

          *any or all of these may or may not be true.

          Adores: 2
  18. 2011 August 8
    funky monkey permalink

    Just gotta say it: Grampdaddy, I love your Jeopardy post that got you in the box. I’d give Hubby Monkey’s left eye* to be as funny as you. If you ever go on tour I’m SO THERE!!! (I’ll be the drunk blonde chick up front that’s getting kicked out for lighting up).

    *I wanted to put “Hubby Monkeys left something-else-if-you-know-what-I-mean”, but I’m trying to behave so YSaC is no longer considered pron and Llamanun (BBUH) can get more sponsors.

    Adores: 0
  19. 2011 August 9
    Windrose permalink

    Grampdaddy, here’s a gentle punchity punch punch ideal for a senor citizen. 8)

    G’Night, Perversia!

    Adores: 0
    • 2011 August 9
      Grampdaddy permalink

      *here’s a gentle punchity punch punch ideal for a senor citizen. 8)

      Hey Taco – I think I found the punch you were missing. It was in the corner of the box under FM’s stories.

      Adores: 1

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