YSaC, Vol 1055: The horse raced past the barn fell.
2011 August 12
Morning! Who’s ready for some dangling modifiers?
horse – $850
ginger is 4 years old she is a 14 hand horse.my little sister used to ride her all the time until we found out she is pregnant we are looking to either sell her for 850.00 or trade her for a big horse that rides please don’t email me i never check my email just give me a call or text me ###-###-####
I’m not sure if I want to spend $850 on your sister… what do you want for the pregnant horse?
Thanks for the link, Jill!
But…you can’t sell your sister she’s going to give birth to a Centaur!
No Sparky!
You were supposed to give your sister a mighty horse steed, not horse seed.
Hey… how did I get back in the corner again?
(presses “Diagram Sentence” button on the horsulator)
So lessee now…. You want to trade your pregnant little sister for a horse that rides? Or do you want to trade your little sister for a horse that rides because the the horse you have now is pregnant? With all that drama in your household, I guess you never get time to check your email.
…for a big horse that rides
Um.. what?
A truck filled with bees.
I prefer my big horses not to ride. It’s really expensive to buy those enormous jodhpurs they insist on wearing.
She wants a big horse that rides
She wants a big horse that rides
She wants a big horse that rides
But she don’t care
You say that horse pregnancy
Is bringing ya down, yeah
Your sis can’t ride anymore
Until that foal’s down, yeah
She wants a big horse that rides
She wants a big horse that ri- i- ides
She wants a big horse that rides
But she don’t care.
The Beatles are turning in their grave.
Love it!
Aren’t half of them still alive?
I was thinking of the dead ones… it’s that kind of Friday. :shrug:
If “ginger” is 14 hands, one wonders what horse dimension they feel is “big.”
[corey] Will guess “big horse that rides” means they have been offered Shires, Clydes, and similar draft horses, which are “big” by any measure and run 16-18 hands tall. Not noted as good riding horses, though.
Also, sparky has already discovered that those big horses are bigger–like you need a special trailer bigger.
[/corey]
A big horse that rides… a motorcycle
Bwahahaha! Picturing a Clydesdale on a Harley Chopper; with a pregnant rider on the sissy-bar behind same. One supposes a “doo-rag” with protruding horse ears adorned with skull-and-crossbones earrings would be apt–as would horseshoes with Maltese cross adornments.
Because someone had to do it… and also… d’awwwww!
You know, if Sparky could just keep his dangling modifier to himself, his sister’s horse wouldn’t have this “little problem”.
I’ll be in the corner.
If it had been “dangling”, it wouldn’t have been a problem.
I’ll be right over to join you. I’ll bring biscotti.
I’m not sure if I want to spend $850 on your sister…
Ostrimu, (BBUY) I think you may not be considering all the options here. For $850, you are actually getting 2-for-1, lowering the cost to $425 each. If she has twins (or even better, triplets) your cost per drops dramatically. You can then sell the babies and/or the sister on Craigslist for a “Nominal Rehoming Fee” or trade one of them for a horse with no name.
(Geez, I should have been an investment banker on Wall Street. I’d be rich.)
If you would just name the horse, it would have saved me an earworm this morning.
“she is a 14 hand horse”
Should have called her Kali. Oh, I know it’s how tall the horse is at the shoulder, but doesn’t one usually say “the horse is 14 hands”?
Maybe the horse is a biter.
“Hey, want an apple? AHHH!”
“Welp, there goes number fifteen.”
I don’t think I’d want a 14-hand horse. I mean, 14 people is alot of people. Maybe if it was a second-hand horse, or even a third-hand. But not 14-hand.
And if it’s a 14-hand horse that got your sister pregnant, then we finally have an explanation for the over-population on Earth.
I like this alot.
1. Oops.
2. The people remind me of Cyanide and Happiness alot.
3. “This site is alot of fun” does not work according to their rules.
Yeah, when the noun isn’t a physical object, it gets a little harder to use.
I think it gets alot harder to use.
🙂
The little sister gets pregnant and once again the horse gets blamed. How typical.
It’s one of the unfortunate misunderstandings that can happen when you tell your sister: “You should go ride your stallion.”
That is what happens when these young girls today start idolizing Catherine the Great.
Yeah, or Lady Gaga.
Well BS, the rabbit died and somebody had to be blamed.
To think of all the bunnuhs in those stick things at the store . . .
[corey] I’ve had to explain “rabbit died” to people, as the use of test animals is long past current; the fact that frogs were more used than rabbits even during that era is even less well known.
Still, strange to have to thirty-somethings that, at one time, biochemistry was so crude as to require raising animals with mortal allergies to specific chemistries, and we actually engaged in destructive testing thereof. And, the reliablity was so great, that testing in that manner was an advancement over all previous methods.
[/corey]
Can’t wait for Mindfield to type a huge Romeo and Juliet style epic about the horse and girl.
Or a comedy. Whichever comes first.
I thought Romeo and Juliet was a comedy?
I mean, come on, everyone dies!
Oh, wait, no, that’s supposed to make it a tragedy, isn’t it?
Bunch of whiny, winging, probably sparkly, lovelorn teenagers in full volume angst? And they all die?
O the silence, O the bless’t crotchety silence, that sylvan Ideal belov’t of curmudgeonry er’ywhere! O rejoice! Rejoice! Still thy canes and walkers of indignant Wrath. be stilled spittle and spume; calm’d as the ocean in the still, still, nocturne.
O bless’t Silence, thy Tickle so welcome aft the sting of “You &#*^% kids offin mah lahwn!”
Did anyone let Rick Santorum know about this?
Does Sparky not realize that pregnancy is usually a temporary condition?
Unlike whatever mental disorder Sparky is currently enjoying.
Usually? What do you mean, usually? That sounds, no offense, a tad unbelievable.
Dunno, my great grandfather’s sister had 13 children in 26 years–dang near conststant.
Must’ve been some cold winter nights…oh great grandfather’s sister, you said? Well, with no internet or television, there wasn’t really much to do, I guess.
Well… yes usually is the word I’d pick.
I implore you to warn us next time if there are pictures.
And fair warning, that link might be disturbing for those with less clinical exposure.
EDIT: Sorry, NMN, I was a bit late with the warning there.
It’s easy to forget not everyone grew up in a house that “Talked Shop” around the dinner table, where “Shop” was medically inclined. I’ve put people off by rambling on about topics not normally acceptable while they’re eating.
I used to get free food at lunch that way.
You can also get free dessert if you tell stories about young children to childless people.
“… it took three hours and a gallon of bleach, but we finally got the stains off of the ceiling! That’s the last time I’ll ever give Junior any of Aunt Agatha’s Prune Surprise!” :laughs: “Hey, are you gonna finish your chocolate mousse?”
Hey, I can comment again! for some reason the site blocked me yesterday and this afternoon, telling me I was a spammer >_>
That’s not nice, calling you a wrench!
“What? . . . ”
Oh, well should have asked for baked beans then, as it would have been “Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Baked beans, and Spam!”
What? Oh, why yes, my ear does itch [roll–purr,purr]
A horse that rides.
Punchity punch punch for CJ, Ghostie, and Hammy.
G’Night, Derby fans!