YSaC, Vol. 1085: What are words for?

2011 September 23
by drmk

spekers – $150


new

 

Post.

Bad.

Thanks, sd!

 

93 Responses leave one →
  1. 2011 September 23

    Sparkums?

    Spekers.

    Fish.

    Adores: 8
  2. 2011 September 23
    LimeLolly permalink

    Spekers….have not mastered ‘get-to-the-pointillism’.

    Adores: 5
  3. 2011 September 23
    D / DM permalink

    Man, I was gonna read YSaC today, but my spekers broke last night and I can’t see anything without them. Wonder if I could find a new pair for less than $200 anywhere?

    Adores: 2
  4. 2011 September 23
    funky "eMonkey" monkey permalink

    Spekers?

    Spackle?

    Sneakers?

    Peckers?

    Corner?

    Adores: 6
  5. 2011 September 23

    interst – $0

    none

    Adores: 13
  6. 2011 September 23

    Found: The Letter A

    ——————————————–

    I found a letter A wandering through downtown last night. If this is yours, please call with a description so I can return it. XXX-xxXX. Ask for Not.A.Sparky.

    Adores: 14
    • 2011 September 23

      Close your tags! This is a family website!*

      *May no longer be true.

      Adores: 4
      • 2011 September 23

        Oh dear! *tries to tie the tag shut*

        Windy…. *offers birdseed* Pwease?

        Adores: 1
        • 2011 September 23
          Windrose permalink

          Izzat how you wanted it, Lyle? I can do more. I can correct posts all day long. Okay, not while at work, and not while sleeping. *checks bird seed* Mmm, the premium stuff!

          Adores: 3
      • 2011 September 23

        *was never true…

        Adores: 4
    • 2011 September 23
      LimeLolly permalink

      Would you like to buy an O? It’ll cost you a nickel.

      Adores: 1
      • 2011 September 23
        ainebegonia permalink

        LL, it’s illegal to sell those here.

        Adores: 4
        • 2011 September 23
          LimeLolly permalink

          Shhhhh!!!! Don’t spread it around, everyone will want one!

          Adores: 4
        • 2011 September 23
          ainebegonia permalink

          Os are hard ons to come by.

          Adores: 4
    • 2011 September 23

      Was it red? Hester somebody put up an ad for one.

      Adores: 4
  7. 2011 September 23

    S pekers new
    S pekers old
    S pekers in an ad nine days old

    *PECIL*

    Adores: 16
  8. 2011 September 23
    Burnt Toast permalink

    Given the rising price of advertising on Craigslist these days, I think we can expect to see a lot more of these cost-effective posts. I mean, did you see how much they wanted for that “a”?

    Adores: 11
    • 2011 September 23

      I hear uncut vowels go for big bucks on the streets, but just try to unload a q or a z. You can’t give those things away.

      Adores: 4
      • 2011 September 23
        ToBScholarly permalink

        The Q and Z are worth 10 points each, are you kidding me? Get that on a triple word score and you are golden!

        Okay, my addiction to WWF is showing.

        Adores: 5
        • 2011 September 23

          Just moved into the 21st Century with an upgraded cell phone and have discovered WWF. Love it!

          Adores: 2
        • 2011 September 23
          ainebegonia permalink

          Someone keeps thoroughly decimating me, but I love the bloody game.

          Adores: 2
    • 2011 September 23
      funky "eMonkey" monkey permalink

      If Sparky was concerned about the price of a’s, he could have bought two e’s and spelled it “speeker”, which would have been better. And made sense. But that would have required thinking. Yeah, um, nevermind.

      Adores: 5
  9. 2011 September 23

    I bet Sparky is a real whiz wiz at Hangman.

    Adores: 5
  10. 2011 September 23

    A guy tries to sell some Speckers and you jump all over him. Jeeze.

    Just because I he had a hard time figuring out how to use the keyboard, that’s no reason to make fun of me him.

    Adores: 9
  11. 2011 September 23
    Meej permalink

    Clearly, Sparky owns a cave, where he traps random explorers and sells them into slavery. In case anyone was wondering, too, he’s helpful enough to point out that this is a “new” batch, not the same ones he sold last time.

    I just can’t figure out how a) CL allowed a human-trafficking post, and b) Sparky dropped the “lunk.”

    Adores: 4
    • 2011 September 23
      Windrose permalink

      Meej, that makes sense because these spe(lunk)ers are new, inexperienced explorers, and easily fall into his pit covered in vines.

      Adores: 3
    • 2011 September 23
      D / DM permalink

      You’ve got to fly below the radar. And you’ve got to keep up with the evolution of euphemisms, blow for blow.

      Adores: 4
      • 2011 September 23

        Slash, based on your comment yesterday about YSaC fanfic, I’m guessing you didn’t meet Captain Destructo. I don’t remember which post was his first appearance, but you can read his complete story on my blog. My name is linked to a short fiction blog where I have some YSaC- inspired stories and some other stories. Captain Destructo is here. Mindfield, who seems to have taken a walkabout, and a couple others sometimes post YSaC-inspired stories, too.

        Adores: 4
        • 2011 September 23
          D / DM permalink

          No, Yancy, I did not meet Captain Destructo. I went out for cigarettes and it took me a few months to find my way back here. I’ll check that out shortly, though. 🙂

          Adores: 2
        • 2011 September 23

          Yancy…I had forgotten you were a technical writer. What an *exciting* job, right?

          My day job consists of a good deal of procedural writing.

          Blech.

          I also freelance for Demand Media. It pays okay, but it’s very confining.

          If I didn’t come here or write on my blog I’d essplody…every.day.

          Adores: 2
        • 2011 September 23

          Procedural writing – as in user manuals? That’s what most of my job describes. Writing user manuals that most users won’t read for software that only a small subset of the military needs. When I tell people what I do, mostly they look at me with an expression of interest. Then I say “it sounds more interesting than it is.” Their expression always turns to empathy or disinterest. I’d love to be a copy editor for a publishing house. Any time I read a novel and come across the slightest typo, my skin crawls just a little.

          Adores: 6
        • 2011 September 23

          Well, Demand Media is always looking for good CEs…you should give it a try.

          Procedures as in how to run a power plant without destroying someone/thing.

          There’s operations procedures and chemistry procedures and there’s even a procedure on writing procedures.

          It’s hell, with fluorescent lighting, some days. Other days it’s really quiet…like today.

          Adores: 3
        • 2011 September 23

          C…, thanks for the tip. I currently keep very busy with responsibilities for my job, family and church responsibilities, and friends. If my schedule opens up soon I’ll definitely pursue something with them.

          Adores: 2
        • 2011 September 24

          Any time I read a novel and come across the slightest typo, my skin crawls just a little.

          ME TOO!!!!!!!! I’m so glad I’m not alone.

          Adores: 0
  12. 2011 September 23
    Windrose permalink

    Does Sparky need a Big A? Cause I’ve got one he can have.

    Adores: 3
    • 2011 September 23
      ToBScholarly permalink

      But not the Big O?

      Adores: 1
    • 2011 September 23
      funky "eMonkey" monkey permalink

      Gimme a D! Gimme a U! Gimme an M, B, A, S, S!

      What does that spell?!

      Sparky? Hello? What does that spell?

      Dayum, son! You ain’t the sharpest knife in the drawer, are ye?

      Adores: 8
      • 2011 September 23

        Sparky’s definitely missing a few sprinkles on his cupcake.

        Adores: 6
        • 2011 September 23
          ainebegonia permalink

          The lights are on, but no one’s home.

          Adores: 0
      • 2011 September 23
        ainebegonia permalink

        Sparky is a few fries short of a happy meal.

        Adores: 3
        • 2011 September 23
          Oh-Steve permalink

          Sharper than a bowling ball!

          Adores: 6
        • 2011 September 23

          Sparky’s a few peppers short of a kebab.

          Adores: 4
        • 2011 September 23

          A couple posies short of a nosegay.

          Adores: 1
        • 2011 September 23

          The elevator doesn’t go to the top floor.

          Adores: 0
        • 2011 September 23

          But it does go to the corner.

          Adores: 0
        • 2011 September 24
          Windrose permalink

          His screen door’s not latched, bless his heart.

          Adores: 1
  13. 2011 September 23
    MandaB permalink

    I believe this ad included fine print which read, “This listing brought to you by Shatner.”

    Adores: 6
  14. 2011 September 23

    This will go awesome with my peaskers set!

    Adores: 3
  15. 2011 September 23

    Brevity is the soul of wit. Extreme brevity is not.

    Adores: 6
    • 2011 September 23
      Lola permalink

      Xtreme brevty is too

      Adores: 5
      • 2011 September 23
        D / DM permalink

        Prove it.

        Adores: 3
        • 2011 September 23
          ainebegonia permalink

          Lola, I think you meant; Xtrem brev is 2.

          Adores: 5
        • 2011 September 23

          @D/DM:
          1. Brevity=Soul of Wit, Extreme Brevity≠Soul of Wit; Given.
          2. Equals=Does Not Equal; CatMath Inequivalency BS Theorem
          3. ∴ Xtreme Brevty=Too; Herpaderpaluffacus

          Adores: 6
    • 2011 September 23
      ToBScholarly permalink

      Extreme brev

      Adores: 2
      • 2011 September 23
        D / DM permalink

        ‘streme.

        Adores: 2
        • 2011 September 23

          Adores: 6
        • 2011 September 23
          Lola permalink

          X

          Adores: 4
        • 2011 September 23
          ainebegonia permalink

          Moooom, Lola’s doing X agaiiin

          Adores: 6
        • 2011 September 23
          D / DM permalink

          Damn it. I thought I was helping by hiding the flask from her, but this is much, much worse.

          *takes a swig*

          Oh, that’s nice. What’s in here, Lola?

          Adores: 2
        • 2011 September 23
          Lola permalink

          Whatever you need it to be, Slash. 8)

          Adores: 1
        • 2011 September 23
          D / DM permalink

          Well, I sure thought it tasted like Cognac and Mountain Dew, but I couldn’t figure out why my drink of choice would be in your flask.

          Adores: 4
        • 2011 September 23
          Windrose permalink

          kelli, you’re looking very ainebegonia today. 8)

          Adores: 2
        • 2011 September 23
          ainebegonia permalink

          It’s the only way I could post.

          Adores: 2
      • 2011 September 23
        permalink

        Adores: 0
  16. 2011 September 23
    Windrose permalink

    The box has gone to the dogs this week, but I think we all agree that camille earned this. I had the work crew put in a sky light and a new sound system.

    Adores: 2
    • 2011 September 23
      D / DM permalink

      Oh, camille gets the new and improved box.

      *Grumbles.*

      Congrats, camille.

      Adores: 2
    • 2011 September 23

      With new spekers?

      Adores: 2
    • 2011 September 23
      camille permalink

      As my first act in the renovated box, I think I’m gonna let Hammy out. Poor boy needs a walk.

      Adores: 3
      • 2011 September 23
        D / DM permalink

        Why did you do that, camille?

        You don’t understand.

        He never sleeps.

        Adores: 5
      • 2011 September 23

        *wags*

        Adores: 4
        • 2011 September 23
          D / DM permalink

          Oh. Hey… Hammy.

          Nice to… have you back…

          *shivers*

          Adores: 3
  17. 2011 September 23
    ToBScholarly permalink

    Maybe Sparky needs to watch this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=adZg1kbcTIQ

    Adores: 1
  18. 2011 September 23
    Irregular Fractal permalink

    keeps wrens -01$5

    Adores: 6
  19. 2011 September 23
    Spaceman.Spiff permalink

    [matte]I’m outraged that CL allows such flagrant trafficking in that most precious of dog breeds, the spaniel-pekinese!
    They are so precious they defy photography more than min-pins, and collect stray A’s off the street.
    The horror the horror!
    [/matte]

    Adores: 8
    • 2011 September 23
      Meej permalink

      I wonder if a spaniel-pekinese cross could be called a “speakeasy.”

      Adores: 5
    • 2011 September 23
      camille permalink

      As a Tibetan spaniel who (according to the dog book) has some relation to the Pekinese, my avatar resembles these remarks. (She is, however, happy that you’ve noticed that she’s precious.)

      Adores: 8
  20. 2011 September 23
    Innana permalink

    This was obviously posted by Calvin Coolidge or a Spartan.

    Adores: 3
  21. 2011 September 23

    Just testing.

    EDIT – okay, I can be kelli on the netbook but not on the phone.

    Adores: 0
    • 2011 September 23
      D / DM permalink

      Hooray!

      Edit: Oh, lamesicle.

      Adores: 1
  22. 2011 September 23

    Testing again

    EDIT

    And it is mysteriously fixed

    Adores: 2
  23. 2011 September 23

    Sometimes, Craigslist really makes you think. Like… what would the world be like if famous authors had taken Sparky’s approach?

    gone with the wind
    sad

    moby dick
    whale
    big

    the count of monte cristo
    revenge

    pride and prejudice
    …that

    Adores: 6
    • 2011 September 23
      D / DM permalink

      roemo and juliet
      dead

      Adores: 3
      • 2011 September 23

        Roemo?
        Is that the 4th, somewhat fishy, stooge?

        Adores: 1
        • 2011 September 23
          D / DM permalink

          Less fishy, more eggy, but yeah, basically.

          Adores: 2
    • 2011 September 23
      Lola permalink

      Hamlet: crazy guy
      Beowulf: monster fight
      War and Peace: that’s it
      The Odyssey: lost
      A Christmas Story: major award

      Adores: 4
    • 2011 September 23

      The Scarlet Letter
      Dimmesdale. Father.

      Julius Caesar
      Dies.

      The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy
      42.

      Ender’s Game
      Gate. Up.

      Dune
      Sandworms. Futurejesus.

      Oepidus Rex
      Momwife.

      Adores: 3
  24. 2011 September 23
    D / DM permalink

    the true lief story of featherfoot
    cocks autobiography

    Adores: 2
  25. 2011 September 24
    Ralph permalink

    I have lots of spekers, but I could use a better subwofer.

    Adores: 0
  26. 2011 September 24
    Windrose permalink

    camille, for all the happy hours in the box, may you enjoy this Punchity Punch Punch!

    G’Night, Soulja Boy!

    Adores: 1

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