YSaC, Vol. 1093: Meme week Day 3: Armoire

2011 October 5

For today’s meme, we bring you – Armoire! Everyone’s read “The Lion, The Witch, And The Wardrobe,” right? So one of these MUST go to Narnia. Let’s see what we have…

TV ARMUOIR


tv armouir for sale ,exc. condtion , no scratches dark stain color 28”widex 24”depth x 54”high call1-###-###-#### ask for richard , will deliver for a small fee, has shelf for tv and bottom shelf for accessories

Oh, I read about these! Armuoirs hide in the tops of trees, shout “Help, Help” and when you look up, they jump down on you! They’re like Heffalamps.

Let’s try another.

SAUDER ARMARIO


HELLO I HAVE A SAUDER WARDROBE/STOARAGE CABINET ARMARIO FOR SALE BRAND NEW IN BOX NEVER OPENED. CALL ###-###-####

“It’s-a me! Ar-mario!”

No thinly disguised Christian metaphors or frozen satyrs here. What else?

Armorie computer desk – $75


“Armorie computer desk opens to use computer and closes to hide suff inside all wood. It is very nice and a super cheap price. We are downsizing so cannot use it. I am sorry I do not have pic cause I cannot figure out how to make them small enough to download. If your interested give me a call and come by and see it ###-###-####. I would take 50.00 if you have someone to move my new one in my house. (Its on the porch now) Thanks”

This was in that Stevie Wonder song, right? With the piano keys? I don’t remember exactly how it goes. That, or I’ve deliberately blacked it out. Probably that one.

OK, one more try, and I’ll give up on ever getting me some of that alternate dimensional Turkish Delight. (Note: not a euphemism.)

large amore dresser – $75


It is missing one nob, but is only a dallar or so at manards or so. It aslo has a small scratch on the back. I am firm on the price becase new I paid 800 so you would be getting a great deal. Only call if you are willing to pay the full amount.

Please bring another person with to carry. It is
heavy , also have a large vechicle to bring it home in.

If interested please call heather at ###-###-####

Aslo! Aslo is like Aslan, right! The problem is that this one only goes to Narnia or so, and unfortunately, the “or so” includes Xanth. And frankly, even I can’t handle that many puns.

Oh well. Maybe some day I can go to Detroit.

Thanks for getting my hopes up, Brent, Susan, and er, us!

76 Responses leave one →
  1. 2011 October 5
    Lola permalink

    Ah, the ever-popular amore dresser! You don’t just keep your clothes in it, you can do things con amore on it once you take your clothes off! Ah, memories.

    Er. Is that just me?
    I’ll be over in the corner with my coffee slice, then.

    Adores: 3
    • 2011 October 5

      You must be really flexible, I tend to fall off those things without some sort of safety harness or at least one roll of duck tape.

      Hey, these coffee slices are mocha!

      Adores: 3
      • 2011 October 5
        Lola permalink

        Ghostie, people think the extra chrome is just decoration, but they’re places you can tie things down. Good looking and useful – just like I like my guys.

        Caramel amaretto slice? I just made fresh.

        Adores: 3
        • 2011 October 5
          Bombdude permalink

          Must be why it’s missing a nob. They exceeded the tie-down tensile limit…

          Adores: 3
      • 2011 October 5

        I think a Monty Python misquote is in order.
        “I object to all this sex on the armore – I keep falling off!”

        Adores: 4
    • 2011 October 5
      MandaB permalink

      I totally agree, Lola. No wonder it has scratches on its back…

      *snerk*

      Corner for me.

      Adores: 6
  2. 2011 October 5

    When the moon hits your eye, lika big pizza pie;
    That’s armuoir!

    When the world seems to shine, like you’ve had too much wine;
    That’s armario!

    When you walk in a dream, but you know you’re not dreamin’ signore!
    Scooza mee, but you see, back in old Napoli;
    That’s armorie!

    Adores: 11
  3. 2011 October 5

    *Dawns the Amore of Invincibility*

    Hah! Ya’ll can’t see me now!

    Adores: 6
    • 2011 October 5
      LimeLolly permalink

      I love it! Amorie!

      Adores: 3
    • 2011 October 5
      Irregular Fractal permalink

      Who’s this Dawn? Sounds like someone I might like to meet…

      Adores: 3
      • 2011 October 5

        Dawn is somebody you should totally meat.

        Adores: 4
        • 2011 October 5
          Windrose permalink

          And thus ends our hopes of ever recovering our good name with google adsencse.

          Adores: 3
  4. 2011 October 5

    The unavoidable amore post.

    Yet another reminder that people forget that spelling is as important to an ad as having something good to sell.

    Also-
    I feel bad for the poor amuoir species sparky is misrepresenting.

    Adores: 1
  5. 2011 October 5
    LimeLolly permalink

    Somebody check the roadmap. This doesn’t look like Narnia.

    Adores: 6
    • 2011 October 5

      :takes out placemat:

      According to this, we should be right beside the giant stack of dancing pancakes and due west of the syrup-bottle clown.

      Adores: 8
      • 2011 October 5
        Windrose permalink

        *peers over Ghostie’s shoulder* We should have turned left at the beaver darn.

        Adores: 4
        • 2011 October 5

          I think that’s a french fry.

          Adores: 6
      • 2011 October 5
        funky "eMonkey" monkey permalink

        *wipes at map/mat*

        Er, my bad. That wasn’t a beaver darn. I wiped my mouth on it, it was ketchup.

        Adores: 3
  6. 2011 October 5

    I’ll bet you can get some pretty good computer desks at the Armorie Antiques Show.

    Adores: 2
  7. 2011 October 5
    Windrose permalink

    “Armorie computer desk opens to use computer and closes to hide suff inside all wood.”

    Firstly, I do not want the computer desk to be using my computer.

    Secondly, I thought CL stopped allowing posts about adult offerings. Inside all wood, indeed!

    Adores: 3
  8. 2011 October 5
    penguin permalink

    Sounds like Sparky 3 may have the perfect desk for WOW players who like to keep their real gun collection close at hand.

    Adores: 2
  9. 2011 October 5

    My God, it’s full of stars…

    Adores: 3
  10. 2011 October 5
    Lola permalink

    “Armorie computer desk – $75”
    I knew the government was downsizing, but didn’t realize they were liquidating the extra supplies from the local armory on CL. Strange days, indeed.

    Adores: 1
  11. 2011 October 5
    Windrose permalink

    Lola, you’re in the box today with a new commenter! Please show evie around, point out all the amenities and anemones.

    Adores: 2
    • 2011 October 5
      Irregular Fractal permalink

      I thought the anemones were the amenities!

      Adores: 4
    • 2011 October 5
      Lola permalink

      I am highly amused and honored to be in the box with someone whose name is part “evil”! Thanks!

      And again … the comment that I think is random and terrible is the one that gets me in the box. I will never understand this, but I’m endlessly amused by it.

      Adores: 2
  12. 2011 October 5
    camille permalink

    I’m appreciating all of the furniture memes, but what I’m really looking forward to is Not.a.Lion day.

    Adores: 4
  13. 2011 October 5
    Irregular Fractal permalink

    Alternate Dimensional Turkish Delight is the name of my Emre Aydın cover band.

    Adores: 6
  14. 2011 October 5
    Ralph permalink

    I’m going to have to stock up on armuoir/armario/armorie piercing ammunition.

    Adores: 3
  15. 2011 October 5

    OT – on the YSaC Friends page on FB, if I post something is it only visible to other YSaC friends?

    Adores: 1
    • 2011 October 5
      Bombdude permalink

      It is only visible to group members of the YSaC group…

      Bombdude
      Secretary to the Asst Secretery of the President
      Dept of Redundancy Dept.

      Adores: 5
  16. 2011 October 5
    TinyBallOfLight permalink

    So, this is totally unrelated to this post, sorry, but I just had to share:

    I occasionally browse PAN (passive aggressive notes) and comment on the funnier entries. But, lately, it’s gotten less snarky and more whiny. The entries AND the comments. But especially the comments. It’s like everyone over there is super sensitive and a little butthurt.

    So, I dared to mention in a comment that I was disappointed by the abundance of whines and lack of good comedy. I mentioned that PAN used to be really funny, and that the comments at YSAC were much funnier.

    I got a very defensive response back, and a blatant criticism of YSAC. Which, quite frankly, sort of proves my point, lol.

    So, in case you weren’t aware, there is apparently a heavy competition between PAN and YSAC — but it could be entirely one-sided. Thought you ought to know. =P

    Adores: 8
    • 2011 October 5

      Do you have a linky for the thread in question?

      Adores: 1
    • 2011 October 5
      TinyBallOfLight permalink

      Yes, I do. =)

      http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/2011/10/03/dont-be-an-ash-hole/comment-page-1/#comment-399167

      Adores: 0
    • 2011 October 5
      funky "eMonkey" monkey permalink

      Pan? Like that half sheep/half hairy man beast? Pftt. Let me at ’em!

      Adores: 1
      • 2011 October 5
        funky "eMonkey" monkey permalink

        Wow. Just checked out PAN. Makes me sad that some snarkers have no better outlet than that. Maybe we could adopt them and drag them here?

        *reads over comments*

        Er, no.

        I tried to click on and check out the song parodies that GhostWriter had in his comment, but the links didn’t work. FFFFFFFFFAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLL!!!

        I showed them my troll face and gave them a “Monkey please!!!!”

        ADDENDUM: I didn’t mean for this to nest here, wanted it under TB’s original post. Nesting FFFFFFAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLL!

        Adores: 1
        • 2011 October 5
          TinyBallOfLight permalink

          Ha ha! Thanks Monkey. =)

          Adores: 0
        • 2011 October 5
          Windrose permalink

          Just FYI, PAN is one of the links under drmk’s Blogs I Like section which shows up on the right of my screen on a normal computer, and who knows where on a tablet or phone.

          Also for Mr. Jobs, Good night sweet prince, and flight of angels sing thee to thy rest.

          Adores: 1
    • 2011 October 5
      Bombdude permalink

      Huh… I always read the notes for my own amusement, but always thought the comments there were whiny and bitchy towards each other… I cannot imagine anyone here reacting to anyone the way that Ghostwriter did towards Tiny…

      Adores: 3
      • 2011 October 5
        TinyBallOfLight permalink

        I was sort of surprised by the backlash…seemed…out of proportion?

        Adores: 2
      • 2011 October 6

        Same here, it’s one of those sites where the comment section is not worth venturing into. Though nothing is worse than the Youtube comment section, nothing.

        Adores: 2
    • 2011 October 5

      Interesting. Ghostwriter certainly seems to know a lot about YSaC history and lore.

      For the record, I love Passive-Aggressive Notes, and used to comment over there regularly before YSaC took off and I didn’t have any time to do anything else. Plus we still get a lot of traffic from the link in their blogroll. So I’m not going to enter into a land war in Asia.

      They have their style of posts, and their style of comments, and we have ours; it’s perfectly fine for someone to prefer the environs over there rather than here. And if they do prefer it over there, I’m fine with them staying there.

      Adores: 7
      • 2011 October 5
        Jen permalink

        So many adores for the PB ref. Also – why does everyone on the internets think that everyone else needs to enjoy the same things as them? And why do they read sites they don’t enjoy? I agree with the Llamanun – I think it’s a little odd that Ghostwriter knows so much about YSaC and yet seems to dislike the site so strongly. Maybe they had an anti-ungulate religious conversion? There’s plenty of stuff on teh interwebs (and on tv, in movies, print, song etc.) that I don’t enjoy, so I don’t engage with it. I’m currently successfully ignoring an entire 6-week-long World Cup happening in my city (except for helping my friends play hunt-the-cute-foreigners at the weekends, natch)!!

        Adores: 4
        • 2011 October 5
          TinyBallOfLight permalink

          I know, I don’t get it either. I used to like PAN a lot more. My comment on that site was referring to the fact that I’ve noticed the comedy has gone downhill. That is all. I LOVE the notes posted — most of the time. The “Tomato Thief” was downright hilarious! But, the comments have gone from witty and sarcastic to whiny and boring. It’s a little disappointing. I see so much potential there! Oh well, I like this community better, so I’ll keep commenting here if that’s alright. I agree Llamanun, no war necessary. =)

          Adores: 2
        • 2011 October 5

          Whenever I feel bad about what I’m doing over here, I just head over to Cheezeburger Cats and read the comments there. Doesn’t take long for the good feelings to come back.

          Adores: 4
      • 2011 October 5
        LimeLolly permalink

        I think I found my way from PAN to here. I like both, but only comment here. YSaC feels like home.

        Adores: 4
        • 2011 October 5

          Not to get too after-school-special on this, but they seem to be some pretty miserable bastards. If you don’t like yourself, you will go out of your way to make others feel as crappy as you.

          Having said that, I can chuck a 165 gram frisbee at nearly 70 mph. Come get some, PAN.

          Adores: 4
      • 2011 October 6
        Windrose permalink

        *unpacks chop sticks, silk gowns, and phrase books* Right, no land wars in Asia!

        Adores: 2
    • 2011 October 5
      ToBScholarly permalink

      I only scrolled about 1/3 of the way down through the comments on PAN before my eyes began to glaze over and my head hurt.

      So I turned around and came back here.

      Adores: 3
  17. 2011 October 5
    MandaB permalink

    Combine any two of these and you end up with a paramour.

    Adores: 9
    • 2011 October 5
      Jen permalink

      Pro: get ‘concerned/helpful’ relatives off your back at Christmas: no more “Oh, but isn’t it time you settled down”, “Still no man, eh?” or “Have you considered the ways of Sappho?” – you can show up with your Brand New Paramour and they’ll finally stop trying to set you up with that weird guy they work with (who smells like potatoes) AND *bonus* you’ll have somewhere handy to put your winter coat, if you need to make a quick exit!!!

      Con: Interacting with Sparkies. Possible amour-transmitted diseases. High likelihood at least one ahrmwoire is full of bees and/or angry rodents.

      Adores: 4
  18. 2011 October 5
    Bombdude permalink

    Hooray for the Pier Xanthony ref! I could only get through about 13 books before I got tired of that trilogy…

    Adores: 3
  19. 2011 October 5
    funky "eMonkey" monkey permalink

    Okay. I did a little more trash-talking on PAN, and provided some dares and a link to come over here. That otter do it.

    Adores: 2
    • 2011 October 5
      Jen permalink

      So, not only did you feed the trolls, but you left them a breadcrumb trail back to us, too? I has a scared. And a mixed analogy.

      Adores: 5
    • 2011 October 6
      TinyBallOfLight permalink

      Yeah, you did! Nice work, Monkey. =)

      Adores: 1
      • 2011 October 6
        funky "eMonkey" monkey permalink

        Well, maybe I shouldn’t have left a link. My thinking was maybe some of them might wander over here, see how cool it is (at least the funnier ones) and hang out here and contribute to the greatness that is YSaC. If our wee site benefits per visit, then the more traffic the better.

        I don’t think any trolls would be happy here. Surely we could beat them off.

        PS: Heh. “Beat them off”. Heh heh. Snort.

        Adores: 1
  20. 2011 October 5
    evilqueen112 permalink

    SAUDER ARMARIO? isn’t that, that new Latin singer? He sings “Armorie, amore dresser”

    Adores: 1
  21. 2011 October 5

    Aslo? Age, Sex, Language, Odiment?

    Vechicle. Car gum.

    Adores: 2
  22. 2011 October 5
    Dan permalink

    I just want to state for the record that I was very proud of “Heffalamps,” and am disappointed no one has commented on it. 🙂

    Adores: 2
    • 2011 October 5

      Gratuitous comment on heffa-somethings to assuage dan’s hurt feelings.

      Adores: 0
    • 2011 October 5

      Oh. I thought you were talking about Winnie the Pooh lights. I have nothing prepared for that.

      Adores: 2
    • 2011 October 5
      ToBScholarly permalink

      I had the Heffalumps once. Took two rounds of antibiotics to get rid of it.

      Adores: 5
    • 2011 October 5
      Jen permalink

      Heffalamps are great and all, but I can never find them in the dark. Or in the light, for that matter…

      Adores: 1
    • 2011 October 6
      Windrose permalink

      Heffalumps are often found in the company of woozles, so I stay away from them. Wouldn’t touch them with a 8”wide x 24”depth x 54”high” aurmoiraiesa.

      Adores: 4
      • 2011 October 6
        TinyBallOfLight permalink

        They’re extra-or-din-ary…so better…be wary…because they come in every shape and size!

        Adores: 0
  23. 2011 October 6

    They misspelled Amur Leopard

    Adores: 2
  24. 2011 October 6
    Windrose permalink

    Might as well punch out Lola and Evie now. Ladies, may I present, your Puchity Punch Punches?

    G’Night, Ashdown Forest!

    Adores: 0
  25. 2011 October 6
    TinyBallOfLight permalink

    I actually have something to say about this posting, and not just about PAN…

    Armario is a-here to save the day, and he’s a not.a.lyin’!

    Adores: 2
    • 2011 October 6
      Windrose permalink

      Timing is everything, Tiny. 8)

      Adores: 1
  26. 2012 February 13

    No, no, no, it’s jagulars that jump down on you from trees. Heffalumps fall into holes and eat all of your bait honey that you thought was cheese.

    Adores: 0

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