YSaC, Vol. 1329: Baby, baby, baby … ew.
2012 August 30
need an artist to draw me a cartoon
so I am helping direct short comedy film that requires a illustration of Kim Kardashian giving birth by farting out a baby Justin Bieber. Its silly, but the scene is really silly. Anyone want to give it a shot? PM me for more details
Lumi, what the hell are you trying to do to me? You send this in, and you expect me to continue functioning as though nothing is wrong with society? This has destroyed every last drop of faith I had in humanity. Art was all I had left, and now that’s gone too.
If you need me, I’ll be face down in the nacho cheese fountain.
*takes loooooooooong swig from flask*
I….uhh….wha?
*takes another long swig from flask*
Yep, roll up the Earth..it’s over.
*passes flask to the llamanun (BBUH)*
I don’t know. That sounds like a fairly accurate Justin Bieber creation myth to me.
Now, where’s that Monkey with my Boast Water?
Here I is!
*slips Rebecca a flask*
Have to wonder if this would-be Ed Wood means an animated short, or a single-panel cartoon?
Sometimes I find it easier to presume stupidity rather than deliberate turpitude.
In that vein, this would be all the more hilarious (because laughter is preferable to weeping) would be if this was posted in Missed Connections.
(Would it be a violation of the CL Terms of Service if it were posted in No Strings Attached?)
This is Sparky, not Pinnochio.
Sparky, you’re so close and yet so far. If you’re going to go celebrity Dada, how about Justin Bieber giving birth to Kim Kardashian?
Oh, no; no-no-no-no. NO! I forbid my brain from picturing th…GAHHH!!!
IT’S TOO LATE! WHAT THE INNER EYE HAS SEEN CANNOT BE UNSEEN!
This is going to completely ruin my S.H.I.T.
It can’t be that horrible…. lots of people fart stinkers.
At least it’s not a SERIOUS Kim Kardashian giving birth to Justin Bieber…
*Squints*
Uh…
*Rereads*
Bwadah?
*Reads it again*
*TACOSPLODEY*
Gawd, not again.
I’ll get the mop.
Thank goodness we ScotchGuarded in here. I’ll fetch the hose and change the “It Has Been [ ] Days Since Our Last Tacosplosion” sign.
:flips counter to zero:
Dammit…and we were this close to an all-time record.
It’s all that caffeine; it gives him a hair-trigger.
Do you think we’ll need the HazMat suits this time?
*grabs a couple of Tyvek suits*
Never hurts to be prepared.
I’m thinking this post could use the “ew” tag. Not to mention “unclear on the concept.”
It definitely should be in WTF, too
And I saw the Llama Nun open one of the Seven Seals of Craigslist and heard the voice of Kim Kardadshian say, “Come and see!”
And I saw and beheld an OH MAH GAWD NO!!!! NOES!!! IT BURNS US IT DOES!!!
Run everyone! Here come the Four Horses!
Epoch o’ lips?
Egg-actly.
Wait, I thought Kimmy had four sisters?
{aside from off-stage}
What? Oh? Not Whor-but HORses? Nevermind
Cap’n! Gasp! Shame on you! 🙂
Oh, dear! Uh, Alvin and the Chipmunks! Beanie and Cecil! OLD Popeye! Woody Woodpecker! (hur hur) OH, damn. Back in the real world. IT’s got me, save yourselves! Arrrrrgh!
I got nothing. No snark, nothing funny. This just makes more depressed at the world. Ah well, at least I’m present and paying attention, I suppose.
I think that’s enough to give you credit for the day. Or at least keep you out of Summer Snark. Believe me, you DON’T wanna have to go thru that.
I don’t even want to know. But at least I get credit for the day, better than nothing.
And you didn’t have to burn a vacation or sick day! Just don’t forget to bring a note from your mom tomorrow.
Really, it’s the Internet. I’m genuinely surprised that Googling this didn’t immediately produce at least 50 variations on the theme.
I could be optimistic and think that there’s finally something that would make Google say “Dude – no.” but it’s probably just a case of Sparky being a lazy asshat who doesn’t want to cut into his valuable pron-watching time with something as mundane as a Google search.
Google never says “Dude – no.” It’s as unlikely as the sun rising in the east, or as my saying a good joke, or mankind just suddenly deciding to forsake technology.
I Googled it and, sure enough, four horses trotted across the screen. Just like the Scripture said.
Gasp. The end is soon. And I’ve still got gift cards from Christmas I’ve not used. And I’ve never been to Paris.
There’s so many things I wanted to get done! Like check out the new Batman movie. Why, Google, why?!
Perhaps it WAS his pron time that gave him the idea….
You cannot make me Google that.
No way…nuh-uh..nope…
*moments pass*
MOTHERFUUUUUUUUUU!!!
I really miss the days when people were famous for being talented. Sometimes I think the paparazzi create these idiots just so they have something “scandalous” to take pictures of.
Sorry, no Cardassians farting beavers, but if you want a Klingon horking up a muskrat I’ll see what I can do.
Is that not why the Bjoran Elders create an Emissary–to prevent such things?
O Ben Sisco, where art thou when most needed?
Hey! I was a Beaver once. It was only for a day though. I wound up having to take a test that day.
*stupid Dick!*
(Actually the teacher’s name was Frog, but for this thread we’ll call him Dick.)
This seems rife with innuendo but my innocent* mind can’t figure it out.
*This mind might not be innocent.
There is no such thing as an innocent mind here. Welcome to the party!
I’ve noticed. I’ve never laughed so hard I cried over a single site’s content and it’s comments that often before.
YSaC is kinda like the Internet’s lint trap – all the stuff you leave in you pockets gets smooshed up against us and then we sort through it and pick out all the shiny pennies and spare buttons and what could be a dollar bill if you iron it out first.
Yeah … I’m not sure where I was going with this. I might have mentioned the insomnia thing.
Lizzi: When I’m on here at work and they’re having a sinus-enema-quality-day*, I have to cover it with coughing. I think my boss thinks I have TB.
*When you laugh hard and snort and snot and shoot liquids on your monitor and keyboard and make your IT guy hate your freakin’ guts and give you dirty looks in the cafeteria. The last time I clicked on one of Taco’s links it took me to a site that made IT feller come beat me with my mouse.**
**This may be a lie. But he does look like he wants to hurt me. I tiptoe past his desk.***
***This ain’t no lie.
Lizzi: One of us! One of us! One of us!
Here, let me draw a cartoon of it for you…
*draws illustration*
…and there you go.
What a lovely illustration. I adore how the colors blend seamlessly into each other, and I believe there are many interpretations for all the symbolism that occurs in each area of the illustration.
You, sir, are a gentleman-scholar-artist.
Yes, a gentleman-scholar-artist.
Sparky is not shiftless & lazy; he’s just drawn that way . . .
Who framed Justin Bieber? Especially in that position.
I am highly disgusted by this ad, but I’m more leaning towards the issue of why can’t the artist give people what they actually want and doodle him getting beaten up? Not violently or anything. I’m picturing a group of old ladies whacking him with their purses
“Anyone want to give it a shot?”
I think that is what Sparky needs. Maybe the producer too.
The problem here is that some yutz wrote a script with this illustration in it.
The next thing is somebody thought it would be a good idea to produce it.
Sparky needs the above prop for the film and can’t draw.
Who is the biggest ass in this endeaver?
(Please don’t say Francis The Talking Mule.)
Kim Kardashian. No question. Have you seen the size of hers?
I know, right?? She’s got how much money…? There’s this great invention called liposuction…What is she waiting for?
She’s waiting for it to become profitable to sell one’s old body fat.
Maybe.
I heard she’s keeping it so she can sell ad space on it.
Just what I heard. Don’t hate on me.
If it were ESPN ads she’d own the world in a day or two
I admit I’ve seen this train wreck called Kardashian a time or two.
I swear Khloe is adopted.
I think Khloe is a man.
Again, don’t hate on me.
“There’s this great invention called liposuction…”
She had that done, but the doctor wasn’t up on his anatomy and sucked everything out of her head.
OMD: Her doctor had 5 seconds spare to perform this procedure? Before the money in his suck-o-meter ran out?
CJ, please come back to the Don’t Suck box any time! Punchity Punch Punch!
Good Morning, Pinkie Lee!