{"id":11738,"date":"2014-12-12T07:07:32","date_gmt":"2014-12-12T12:07:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/?p=11738"},"modified":"2014-12-11T22:07:52","modified_gmt":"2014-12-12T03:07:52","slug":"ysac-vol-1794-i-gotta-crow","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/?p=11738","title":{"rendered":"YSaC, Vol. 1794: I gotta crow."},"content":{"rendered":"
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Sleeping Beauty: Crow Edition – w4mm (My neighbor’s house)<\/h2>\n
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\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Maleficent has struck again. Princess Aurora (or prince, not yet verified) has yet once again been cursed and has been in a deathlike sleep for the past 4 days. Maleficent has kicked it up a notch this time. Aurora is trapped in the body of a crow, sleeping peacefully on a tree swing in my neighbor’s front yard. So, I am now seeking a Prince Phillip to provide a true love’s kiss. Looking for someone with a good immune system, just in case this is just a random dead crow that happened to die in a really cool way. Yet, I’m pretty sure it’s Aurora. Kinda.<\/p>\n

To apply, just show up to my neighbors house and start kissing the dead crow, I mean Aurora, and hopefully you’ll have the magic touch!
\n(If an older man comes out of the house and starts shooting at you, you didn’t get the job).
\nGood luck!<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Most of the time, we don’t use this type of post on YSaC. This type of Sparky doesn’t really *suck* at Craigslist, they’re just trying a little too hard to be funny. It raises the question of why they pick Craigslist as their medium of choice in the first place, instead of a bathroom wall or the New Yorker, but whatever.<\/p>\n

In this case, however, I am intrigued by their choice of category. “w4mm”, as far as I can figure it, is intended to be used by women looking for two men for a threesome, and not, for example, for people seeking romance with a dead crow. I’m pretty sure I don’t WANT to know what category that goes in, and if you bring up rule 34, I will punch you in the neck.<\/p>\n

Thanks for the post, Zippy!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Sleeping Beauty: Crow Edition – w4mm (My neighbor’s house) Maleficent has struck again. Princess Aurora (or prince, not yet verified) has yet once again been cursed and has been in a deathlike sleep for the past 4 days. Maleficent has kicked it up a notch this time. Aurora is trapped in the body of a […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[17],"tags":[29,34],"class_list":["post-11738","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-personals","tag-fun-with-pictures","tag-trying-too-hard"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11738","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=11738"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11738\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":11742,"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11738\/revisions\/11742"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=11738"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=11738"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=11738"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}