{"id":1426,"date":"2009-03-29T08:10:54","date_gmt":"2009-03-29T11:10:54","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/?p=1426"},"modified":"2009-04-27T23:34:35","modified_gmt":"2009-04-28T02:34:35","slug":"ysac-vol-254","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/?p=1426","title":{"rendered":"YSaC, Vol. 254: $5 *is* a lot of money to invest in yourself."},"content":{"rendered":"<blockquote>\n<h2>Im looking to sell myself, but dont wana pay 5 bux &#8211; 27 (wherever u are)<\/h2>\n<hr \/>\n<p>Did you know that to post in &#8220;Erotic Services&#8221; you need to pay 5 bucks, AND a phone confirmation!! Im trying to make money, not spend it! So basically the truth is, a couple nights ago I watched &#8220;American Gigalo&#8221; with Richard Gere.. You remember that one? In it, Richard plays the role of a lifetime, where he basically lounges around all day by the pool, waiting for his shift to start.. And his job is simple-Look good in a tux.So I thought, why not. I look good in a tux RIGHT?<br \/>\nSo I came here to craigslist to post myself Richy Gere style, but was shocked to see that in order to post, u gota spend FIVE DOLLARS!! WHAT!?<br \/>\nPlus, I didn&#8217;t see one single dood in the erotic services sooooooo&#8230;&#8230;..<br \/>\nif you&#8217;re going to that dinner with tha mayor tonight..Don&#8217;t hesitate to, first  buy me a tuxedo, then call me up.<\/p>\n<p>My name is Julian. Prices may vary. [spelled out area code], five hundred fourteen, [number] thousand [number] hundred [number]-nine<\/p>\n\n\t\t<style>\n\t\t\t#gallery-1 {\n\t\t\t\tmargin: auto;\n\t\t\t}\n\t\t\t#gallery-1 .gallery-item {\n\t\t\t\tfloat: left;\n\t\t\t\tmargin-top: 10px;\n\t\t\t\ttext-align: center;\n\t\t\t\twidth: 50%;\n\t\t\t}\n\t\t\t#gallery-1 img {\n\t\t\t\tborder: 2px solid #cfcfcf;\n\t\t\t}\n\t\t\t#gallery-1 .gallery-caption {\n\t\t\t\tmargin-left: 0;\n\t\t\t}\n\t\t\t\/* see gallery_shortcode() in wp-includes\/media.php *\/\n\t\t<\/style>\n\t\t<div id='gallery-1' class='gallery galleryid-1426 gallery-columns-2 gallery-size-thumbnail'><dl class='gallery-item'>\n\t\t\t<dt class='gallery-icon landscape'>\n\t\t\t\t<a href='http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/03\/252a.jpg'><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"150\" height=\"150\" src=\"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/03\/252a-150x150.jpg\" class=\"attachment-thumbnail size-thumbnail\" alt=\"\" \/><\/a>\n\t\t\t<\/dt><\/dl><dl class='gallery-item'>\n\t\t\t<dt class='gallery-icon landscape'>\n\t\t\t\t<a href='http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/03\/252b.jpg'><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"150\" height=\"150\" src=\"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/03\/252b-150x150.jpg\" class=\"attachment-thumbnail size-thumbnail\" alt=\"\" \/><\/a>\n\t\t\t<\/dt><\/dl><br style=\"clear: both\" \/><dl class='gallery-item'>\n\t\t\t<dt class='gallery-icon landscape'>\n\t\t\t\t<a href='http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/03\/252c.jpg'><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"150\" height=\"150\" src=\"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/03\/252c-150x150.jpg\" class=\"attachment-thumbnail size-thumbnail\" alt=\"\" \/><\/a>\n\t\t\t<\/dt><\/dl>\n\t\t\t<br style='clear: both' \/>\n\t\t<\/div>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p><\/p>\n<p>\nOverall, this is a great plan. There&#8217;s just a few problems with it that I&#8217;d like to address:<\/p>\n<ol>\n<li>You aren&#8217;t Richard Gere.<\/li>\n<li>Posing by someone else&#8217;s Mercedes is not classy.<\/li>\n<li>If you&#8217;re going to be a gigolo, you should really own your own tux.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p>Other than that, I can&#8217;t see a single problem with this plan.<\/p>\n<p>I think I should start a &#8220;what could possibly go wrong?&#8221; tag. Or does &#8220;this can only end badly&#8221; cover it?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Im looking to sell myself, but dont wana pay 5 bux &#8211; 27 (wherever u are) Did you know that to post in &#8220;Erotic Services&#8221; you need to pay 5 bucks, AND a phone confirmation!! Im trying to make money, not spend it! So basically the truth is, a couple nights ago I watched &#8220;American [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[17],"tags":[23,38,52,9],"class_list":["post-1426","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-personals","tag-classy","tag-humanity-is-doomed","tag-this-can-only-end-badly","tag-unclear-on-the-concept"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1426","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1426"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1426\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1776,"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1426\/revisions\/1776"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1426"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1426"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1426"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}