{"id":1498,"date":"2009-04-04T10:01:45","date_gmt":"2009-04-04T13:01:45","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/?p=1498"},"modified":"2009-04-27T23:32:16","modified_gmt":"2009-04-28T02:32:16","slug":"ysac-vol-260","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/?p=1498","title":{"rendered":"YSaC, Vol. 260: Note to self — don’t search for “sexy secretary” with safe search off."},"content":{"rendered":"
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Sexy Personal Assistant<\/h2>\n
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I’m looking to hire a personal assistant to help out around my home office. I’m a good looking 28 year old man who runs a small company and I need to hire someone to take care of answering the phones, responding to clients and taking notes while I’m in meetings and just everyday helping out and tidying up around the office. I would like to hire a sexy little 18-25 year old girl. This is a strictly working relationship and not require you to do anything physical with me. I only require that whoever I hire comes to work in cute and sexy outfits to parade the office all day and giving me something to stare at. You would have the opportunity however to make extra money every now and then giving me a lap dance if you were open to that. Serious inquiries only. Looking to fill the position by the end of the week.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/p>\n

\nI think someone’s been watching Secretary<\/em> a few times too many. Would I have to wear the saddle and hold the carrot in my mouth?<\/p>\n

Kim submitted this one, saying, “I kind of want to take the job just so I can sue him for his business later on. \u00a0I’m sure I could run it better than this ungrammatical horndog, whatever it is.”<\/p>\n

This really is a lawsuit waiting to happen. I like how it progresses from “strictly working relationship” to “you can give me a lap dance”. Nope, I’m sure there’s no ulterior motives here.<\/p>\n

Maybe he’ll get lucky and get Mrs. Wiggins!
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Sexy Personal Assistant I’m looking to hire a personal assistant to help out around my home office. I’m a good looking 28 year old man who runs a small company and I need to hire someone to take care of answering the phones, responding to clients and taking notes while I’m in meetings and just […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[54,56],"tags":[58,23,38,10,52],"class_list":["post-1498","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-etc-jobs","category-other","tag-asshat","tag-classy","tag-humanity-is-doomed","tag-slimy","tag-this-can-only-end-badly"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1498","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1498"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1498\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1770,"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1498\/revisions\/1770"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1498"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1498"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1498"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}