This was posted in m4w.<\/p>\n
\nSeeking smart woman for mahogany desk job LTR? – 38<\/h2>\n
\nCareer dreamer seeks icy snapper to sharpen my pencils in.
\nI would like a partner to plug into my desk.
\nI came upon this beauty a few months ago doing a cash side job on the West Side.
\nMe and this guy named Sky were moving a prickly little poodle past her orifice,
\nwhen divine intervention manifested destiny!
\nWe dropped her custom made Italian Mahogany partners desk down a manhole.
\nShe was married to this classical fellow who built a fortune from an erector set,
\nbut his eyes fell out and her cats ate them.
\nShe had to move on. So she\u2019s trained in some kinda cerebella palsy\u2026 (powerful stuff),
\nand she picks up this desk off Ruby Lane for a couple O G. Well this desk must have had some magic dust in it or something cause she started sucking up more clients then her little cube could handle.
\nThat\u2019s where me and Sky came in. You tell us \u201cwhere\u201d and we ask you \u201cwhy\u201d. Sky came up with that one. Boss wouldn\u2019t paint it on the truck though.
\nSo we were moving this tricky sweet pony uptown when she goes into a caramel latte slide and completely upsets our feng sway. Down goes the partners desk and the manhole is burping like an alcoholic barber.
\nThere was crap all over the place, and she wanted our heads. I looked up at Sky and said
\n\u201cThe custom Italian Mahogany desk has fallin.\u201d
\nHe just passed over man, like it didn\u2019t even matter. I looked down at that beaded old purse and she was flapping like a wind sock on Mount Washington.
\nTook me close to a month to find work again, (due exclusively too the mostly unkind ways in which she remembered us in the police report) but 30 days later I\u2019m under the street sucking sludge for a guy named Demillo- and BOOM, its that desk!
\nI hauled my prize back to the storage unit\/apartment I rent- and there she sits.
\nIts got two holes in it, I just need a partner to fill the other side. If you have a chair that adjusts it would be perfect as she lost a little height in the fall.
\nAlso- please be a highly educated professional gainfully employed white collar type,
\nCause I cant get the drawers open. There is magic dust in there!<\/p><\/blockquote>\nWell, there you go then. I wish I could say this was an April Fools joke of some kind, but I think this guy really brought the crazy out for this one.<\/p>\n
For the record, there’s actually a lot that’s GOOD about this post, too — the imagery is vivid, he has a good sense of cadence, and for the most part his spelling is accurate. And after about the fourth or fifth time reading through the post, you can start to get a general sense of the narrative. But there’s a lot that’s wrong with it, too.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
This was posted in m4w. Seeking smart woman for mahogany desk job LTR? – 38 Career dreamer seeks icy snapper to sharpen my pencils in. I would like a partner to plug into my desk. I came upon this beauty a few months ago doing a cash side job on the West Side. Me and […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[17],"tags":[11,42],"class_list":["post-1508","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-personals","tag-wtf","tag-zen"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1508","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1508"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1508\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1773,"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1508\/revisions\/1773"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1508"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1508"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1508"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}