YSaC, Vol. 1560: Someone get the farmer’s wife.

2013 July 19

Today’s lesson, boys and girls, is about planning.

When you take an action, it is important to anticipate the consequences of that action. For example, if I were to leave a skateboard on the stairs, what might happen?

“Um… you might fall?”

Very good! Do you think I WANT to fall?

*mumble*

What was that?

“No.”

That’s right. So I probably shouldn’t put a skateboard on the stairs. Let’s try another one. What if I were to leave this Pop Tart on the counter for a week? What would be a consequence?

“Um… Ralphie would eat it?”

No, let’s pretend Ralphie can’t reach the counter.

“Ralphie would get a chair?”

Look, forget about Ralphie. What else might happen?

“You might get ants?”

Right! Do we want ants on our… where’d the Pop Tart go?

*burp*

Ralphie! That’s not yours. OK, last example:

Someone to pickup dead mouse and dispose – $20


I smell a odor in my washroom and I think it’s a dead mouse that got caught in on of the traps. I really need someone to pickup the trap and dispose of it. The area is located behind a washer and dryer. It’s probably in a covered trap so most likely you won’t see it just smell. Thanks

So, let’s say you put a mousetrap in your washroom – do you think you perhaps should have a plan for what might happen if a mouse got caught in it?

“Do you have any more Pop Tarts?”

Sigh. Never mind. Let’s all say thank you to Mandy for the nice post.

29 Responses leave one →
  1. 2013 July 19

    Thank you to Mandy for the nice post!

    I thought there was a box of Pop Tarts here a second ago . . .

    Adores: 2
    • 2013 July 19

      Ummm … the zombie mouse ate them?

      Adores: 3
      • 2013 July 19

        And then the zombie cats ate the mice, and them there was zombie bubonic plague.

        …Wow, that would be a shit way to have a zombie apocalypse.

        Adores: 6
        • 2013 July 19

          But very unexpected. No one ever suspects the zombie cats.

          Adores: 8
        • 2013 July 19

          No one expects the zombie-feline inquisition!

          [/Monty Python]

          Adores: 7
  2. 2013 July 19

    I smell a odor, and I want the mouse picked up.
    My common sense would fit inside a Dixie cup.
    What did you mean when you said I should plan ahead?
    How could I have known that the mouse would soon be dead?

    Adores: 7
  3. 2013 July 19

    Easiest 20 bucks I ever made. But don’t tell Sparky I just “disposed” of it in the back of their car. (What? It’s their own fault for leaving the top down.)

    Adores: 8
    • 2013 July 28
      annaandabanana permalink

      Given what we know about Sparky’s intelligence and thinking skills, I would not be at all surprised if said Sparky leaves the top down, the windows open, and fly unzipped.

      I do like your idea, TC! Sparky would be online posting (in a panic) an ad for someone to remove the mouse from the car so that they can leave for work. “I would pay $20, but I have not been able to work because of a mouse in my car, and in fact I’m not even sure I still have a job.”

      Sorry, late night ramblings.

      Adores: 1
  4. 2013 July 19

    Buzzword translation:

    “Ooooh god, I caught a mouse, I actually caught a mouse, it’s dead, it’s in the trap, oh fuck, what do I do what do I do what do I do somebody please help me-hee-hee!”

    *sobs*

    Adores: 4
  5. 2013 July 19

    So Sparkles would really rather live with that delightful mouse-corpse musk until someone responds to their ad rather than immediately throwing the damned thing out themselves?

    :headdesk:

    Adores: 8
    • 2013 July 19

      I think we may be overestimating the problem. I mean the bones will be there for a long time, but the smell will only last as long as it takes the bacteria and maggots to get rid of all the flesh.

      Adores: 4
  6. 2013 July 19
    HamCan permalink

    Just be glad it wasn’t a moose trap…

    Adores: 12
    • 2013 July 19

      I know, right? Their antlers get tangled up in the trap and it’s really hard to get them out. I usually end up throwing out the whole trap with the moose still stuck in it.

      Adores: 5
      • 2013 July 19
        Windrose permalink

        Then what do you do with the squirrel?

        Adores: 1
        • 2013 July 19
          HamCan permalink

          SQUIRREL!!!!!!!!!!!!

          Adores: 3
        • 2013 July 19
          Fearless Leader permalink

          I’ll take it from here.
          That Boris and Natasha could never do anything right.

          Adores: 1
  7. 2013 July 19
    Ralph permalink

    If you don’t stake and chain your traps, the darn meese move them into inaccessible locations while thrashing in agony. For $20, Sparky wants someone to move appliances and rip up floorboards to reach the trap, replace everything, and dispose of either the mouse and/or the trap; the listing isn’t really clear on that point.

    And I hate pop tarts.

    Adores: 4
    • 2013 July 19
      nojazzhere permalink

      I love ’em!!!!!!! Do you think there’s any pop tart left??? That would be, like, a bonus!!!! Count me in…..

      Adores: 3
  8. 2013 July 19
    Irregular Fractal permalink

    Solution:
    Respond to ad.
    Enter home carrying large Sparky trap.
    Set trap.
    Tell Sparky the mouse has been dispatched.

    In about a day, Sparky will no longer complain about the smell, and society will thank you.

    Adores: 3
    • 2013 July 19
      HamCan permalink

      Sparky Trap is your ELO cover band.

      Adores: 4
  9. 2013 July 19
    CapnMac permalink

    Was just thinking “How many friends got called before going to CL?”
    Only to realize that Spark’ probably does not have any, living in the parental basement, the ‘rents having decamped to, oh, Nepal, to be closer to their (as they have been claiming for years) “gifted” child . . .

    Adores: 3
  10. 2013 July 19
    CapnMac permalink

    This is what I was reading just before venturing to today’s YSaC:
    http://themattwalshblog.com/2013/07/17/my-child-is-gifted-hes-also-29-unemployed-and-living-in-my-basement/

    I now wonder what other tasks “Nick” sublets onto CL . . .

    Adores: 3
  11. 2013 July 19
    Grumpy Grammy permalink

    It’s not clear whether the $20 is for disposing of the mouse and trap (easy money) or for moving the appliances in order to dispose of said mouse and trap (not enough money). If it were me, I could move the washer and drier but disposing of the mouse and trap, or even seeing them, would be another matter entirely.

    Adores: 2
    • 2013 July 20
      Irregular Fractal permalink

      What, don’t you carry a Mouse Magnet (TM) (pat. pending) with you for such work?

      Adores: 0
  12. 2013 July 20

    Monica, I would say you fell into bad company with C””J and IF, but you came here of your own free will. Thank you! Punchity Punch Punch!

    Good Morning, Gray Mouser!

    Adores: 0

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