You Suck at Craigslist

YSaC, Vol. 420: The house also comes with hot and cold running heroin.

Written by

drmk

in

FREE MARIJUANA PLANTS!! ([entire address posted!])

I just moved into a new house and I found what appears to be 7 female marijuana plants. The plants are about 4-5 feet tall each and are about to bud. I will also give away the buds and seeds that have been produced buy these plants.
If you would like to pick these up, please call Junior @ xxx-xxx-xxxx.

Thanks.

Do you think this person is operating under the “it’s not illegal if I don’t sell it” theory? I mean, he certainly seems to know a lot about marijuana plants for someone who is uninterested in keeping them. I suppose it’s also possible someone is trying to get Junior busted. Or robbed.

Regardless, posting your full address and phone number when advertising marijuana is probably a pretty bad idea:

QUINCY, Mass. — A man has been arrested after he allegedly placed an advertisement on Craigslist selling marijuana. Police said undercover detectives responded to the advertisement and bought a small bag of pot from 30-year-old Christopher Gray for $45.

According to police, Christopher Gray posted the advertisement on the online classified site with the words “420 help is here.” The item read “Give me a ring if you need some help,” and listed a phone number, which a detective called Friday and arranged for a meeting with Gray in Quincy.

Junior may be moving to another new house soon. To Junior’s credit, this is the most coherent advertisement for marijuana that I’ve ever seen, so hopefully he’ll enjoy the prison library.

Thanks for the submission, Katika!

Comments

41 responses to “YSaC, Vol. 420: The house also comes with hot and cold running heroin.”

  1. Colleen in MA Avatar
    Colleen in MA

    Look for this news headline soon:

    Man arrested for selling stolen marijuana plants

  2. PrincessLuceval Avatar
    PrincessLuceval

    He certainly knows a lot about the plants he “discovered.” How do you tell if they’re female? Look under their leaves?

    1. SoundsLikeVla Avatar
      SoundsLikeVla

      Oh good-none of those male plants! They’re so territorial…

    2. sarajean80 Avatar
      sarajean80

      Now I’m picturing tiny dresses on the plants, and maybe a pretty ribbon or two.

    3. drmk Avatar
      drmk

      Ah, the things you can learn from Google … Male vs. female pot plants, and why you don’t want male plants.

      Who knew? (Well, other than folks who grow marijuana, I mean.)

      1. Martha Avatar
        Martha

        I’m very curious, but I think clicking those links on my work laptop is a BAD idea.

      2. MsDolfinn Avatar
        MsDolfinn

        Wow…that was everything I never wanted to know about marijuana. Darn me and my curious nature.

      3. Count Blah Avatar
        Count Blah

        I knew. I came by the info from the opposite end, though–on some green website that explained the environmental advantages of hemp rope/clothing/etc.

    4. Doug Avatar
      Doug

      I think the males tend to spray to mark their territory.

  3. Becky Avatar
    Becky

    I completely missed the “L” in “plants.” “Free Marajuana Pants” sounded far more interesting than plants…

    1. Amaia Avatar
      Amaia

      http://eiganoderutan.fc2web.com/simpsons/img/210_2.jpg

  4. sarajean80 Avatar
    sarajean80

    Wow. Just…Wow. I thought the furnace guy and the car thief were dumb.

    I guess the plants were taking up the room he was going to use for his still.

    “Free Marijuana Pants” would be a great band name, one of those not-quite-horrible bar bands that can only do Grateful Dead and Doors covers in exchange for a free tab.

  5. kelli Avatar
    kelli

    And now you know why it’s called Dope.

  6. kt Avatar
    kt

    “Man arrested after police arrive to find supposed marijuana plants were in fact seven small girls about 4-5 feet tall”

    1. MsDolfinn Avatar
      MsDolfinn

      Would that be seven small girls about 4-5 feet tall named Mary Jane?

  7. mudslicker Avatar
    mudslicker

    And yet another front seat rider on the fast track of the Natural Selection Train! This has GOT to be a setup. No one can be that stupid, can they? *whimper*

  8. queensbee Avatar
    queensbee

    they are that stupid. only NOT dying prevents them from receiving darwin awards. be thankful that you didnt birth em or have to teach em.

  9. Fraulein N Avatar
    Fraulein N

    Oh lord, he put his whole address and everything.

    Bless his stupid little (pot-addled) heart.

    1. sarajean80 Avatar
      sarajean80

      Yeah, I’m guessing there were originally more that 7 to begin with.

  10. Sue D. Nymme Avatar
    Sue D. Nymme

    Just a guess, but it wouldn’t surprise me if the ad were placed by a neighbor or enemy as a “prank” to get someone in trouble.

  11. bbg Avatar
    bbg

    Maybe the “free giveaway” ad was a police sting?

  12. Rick Avatar
    Rick

    Anyone else like the fact that this was Vol. 420?

    1. drmk Avatar
      drmk

      Well spotted.

    2. Bridgete Avatar
      Bridgete

      I saw that too. =)

    3. Rhiannon Avatar
      Rhiannon

      I’m sure drmk did that on purpose ;~)

    4. jackie31337 Avatar
      jackie31337

      I figured it was related to the content of the post, but I didn’t realize we actually were up to vol. 420. I thought maybe drmk got creative with the numbering.

  13. Legion, for we are many Avatar
    Legion, for we are many

    I once roomed at a house my friend had just bought, and he discovered dead/dried up pot plants in a locked sub-space of the basement. Freaked out about how the police could take possession of his house, he called the police to come and get them. It was goofy but the dutiful police did in fact come and get them…Not sure why they were abandoned, other than the prospect of moving them and the equipment probably was a challenge for the previous occupants, ha! I am still waiting for bodies to be found in the crawl-space; it was a v. spooky basement. In any event, Craigslist never even crossed our minds for obvious reasons….

  14. Batman Avatar
    Batman

    You know, I don’t think I will be able to really explain to people why I now know that there is a difference in marijuana plant sexes. They are never going to believe I learned this on YSACL. I am going to have to keep this article number in my wallet, should the fact ever come up.
    How strange the loss of innocence occurs.

    1. drmk Avatar
      drmk

      See? We here at YSaC are all about education. Maybe not the type you expected, though.

    2. JcT Avatar
      JcT

      Yeah, good idea. Write on a scrap of paper, “Article 420 – got from drmk at YSaC.”

      If it is ever found, that’s going to keep you and the police in the interrogation room for a couple extra hours!

      “No really, she runs a blog!”
      “”Oh, I see, a ‘blog’. Is that what you hippies are calling it now?”

  15. kristen55 Avatar
    kristen55

    So, how stoned do you have to be to think that “420” is top-sekrit code enough that the cops will never figure out what you mean when you post it on CL?

    1. frigglesnitz Avatar
      frigglesnitz

      Dude, put like, “420 help” or something in the ad, so like, the cops won’t get like, we’re like selling like umm…uhh…Dude, I’m hungry. Tahaaha!

  16. Sarah Avatar
    Sarah

    Hey, I live in Quincy! I’m so proud…..

    1. Bridgete Avatar
      Bridgete

      I live in Quincy too! It is indeed a proud day for our town. 😉

  17. DW Avatar
    DW

    Someone is smoking too much of what they are selling/ giving away.

  18. Katy Avatar
    Katy

    Junior, as in Junior detective, who will probably get promoted if enough idiots answer this ad?

    If you believe that, and if you have an active warrant, I have a free boat for you…

  19. Heather Avatar
    Heather

    Best YSaC ever.

  20. Caro Avatar
    Caro

    I’m so out of it, I don’t even get the 420 reference. :::hanging grizzled head in shame:::

  21. Lola Avatar
    Lola

    This level of intelligence reminds me of a story a police officer once told me – a parent once called in to report that their child had stolen from them … stolen their stash, to be precise.

  22. 420? – Anchorage – Alaska (AK) – City-Data Forum

    […] This guy can help you: YSaC, Vol. 420: The house also comes with hot and cold running heroin. | You Suck at Craigslist […]

  23. blinkingblythe Avatar
    blinkingblythe

    Unfortunately, posting this stuff on Craigslist is going to get the anti cannibis nazis breaking down their door. Remember, MJ is illegal, yet alcohol (which causes violence) is not. Feh! Oh yes, we are engaged in a never ending drug war that profits the cartels and the gov’t, and has lead to the creation of really nasty drugs like meth. PS: I don’t recommend coming to America, after all we are at war (drug war) :/

Leave a Reply

More posts