{"id":3063,"date":"2009-12-02T09:18:39","date_gmt":"2009-12-02T13:18:39","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/?p=3063"},"modified":"2009-11-29T23:25:41","modified_gmt":"2009-11-30T03:25:41","slug":"ysac-vol-503-i-see-a-red-pew-and-i-want-it-painted-black","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/?p=3063","title":{"rendered":"YSaC, Vol. 503: I see a red pew and I want it painted black."},"content":{"rendered":"<p>In my delirious stream-of-consciousness holiday survival mode, these things go together:<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<h2>Free pain! Lots of it!<\/h2>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>Now I know some folks are into that kind of thing, and that&#8217;s fine. I just want to point out what a difference a &#8220;t&#8221; makes. It seems like something you might want to include in your title.<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<h2>FREE OIL-BASED PAIN<\/h2>\n<hr \/>\n<p>@ [Name of] Church.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>No thanks, I&#8217;m not <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Pomponio_Algerio\">Pomponio Algerio<\/a>. It&#8217;s nice to see that religion is sticking to its traditions, though.<\/p>\n<p>And while we&#8217;re on the topic of churches &#8230;<\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<h2>Free Church pews&#8230;please them.<\/h2>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>Amanda sends this one in, saying, &#8220;The church pews are not pleased by your offering. The church pews demand a tribute of <a href=\"http:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/?p=1683\">bedazzled Jesus belt buckles<\/a>.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Make it so, or you know what will happen!<\/p>\n<p>Thanks to Kevin, Jen, and Amanda!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>In my delirious stream-of-consciousness holiday survival mode, these things go together: Free pain! Lots of it! Now I know some folks are into that kind of thing, and that&#8217;s fine. I just want to point out what a difference a &#8220;t&#8221; makes. It seems like something you might want to include in your title. FREE [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[30,16],"tags":[25,60,7],"class_list":["post-3063","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-free","category-furniture","tag-maybe-its-just-me","tag-random-musings","tag-speeling-prolbems"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3063","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3063"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3063\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3066,"href":"https:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3063\/revisions\/3066"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3063"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3063"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.yousuckatcraigslist.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3063"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}