You Suck at Craigslist

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  • YSaC, Vol. 351: But it’s Canadian money, so it’s worth $2.50.

    3 thousnad dollars For Help – 35

    Hello!
    I’m ready to pay any woman willing to help me having my permanent residence,
    If you’r looking for more please tell me email me and leave me a phone number to joing you.

    351

    Andrea sends in this listing from Montreal, saying, “I mean, seriously, if your future depends on trying to break immigration laws by paying a woman to marry you so you can stay in the country, you’d think you could at least take the time to 1) spell check your ad, 2) make said ad understandable, and 3) find a photo of yourself where you don’t look like an asshat wannabe gangsta with mental problems.”

    You also might want to spend a little less time photoshopping bling into your picture.

  • YSaC, Vol. 350: One of these things is not like the other …

    4 Tall Standing Lamps – $20

    4 lamps for sale. 3 of them are identical (black lamp). I only have one of the yellow wooden lamp. All are functional. Buy all 4 for $20.

    Is it really necessary to post three of the exact same picture just because you have three of the same lamp?

  • YSaC, Vol. 349: At least she’s not a wrapper.

    im a female raper and singer looking for management

    Hi i a m an up incoming artist in search of good management.I have lots of songs recorded I just need a boost in my career I have a nice hot look most important I have talent. If you want to check out my pics leave me an email and I will responde my email is xxxxx2004xxxxx@yahoo.com are ashleyblondemodeltype1@xxxxxxxxxxxx r call me by phone for serious people only please xxxxxxxxxx ask for ashley

    Yup, that’s right, folks …. she’s an up incoming female raper.

    What a difference a “p” makes, huh?

  • YSaC, Vol. 348: It’s an anagram of “flab solo”.

    Another in the series of, “If you can imagine the misspelling of it, it’s already on Craigslist!” Today’s challenge: foosball tables. Quick, think of the strangest spelling imaginable of foosball. Now click to see what others came up with …

    (more…)

  • YSaC, Vol. 347: You say Prevential, I say Prudential ….

    It just doesn’t stop.

    2 French Prevential Twin Bed Set, chest, dresser, mirror – $450

    2 French Prevential Twin Bed Sets
    Includes:
    2 Beds with wood side rails
    9 drawer Dresser
    Chest of Drawers
    Mirror$450 OBO

    Call xxx-xxx-xxxx

    347a347b347c347d

    And, of course … because these things always travel in packs:

    French Prevential Sofa And Loveseat – $200

    Good Condition Call For More information xxx-xxx-xxxx347e

    It’s gotten so bad that whenever I see a listing for French Provincial, I actually have to stop and think about whether that’s right or not. I’m sure I’m not the only person who’s done this, since a couple of people have sent me listings for French Provincial furniture!

  • YSaC, Vol. 346: For the love of all that is good and right, please help this man.

    Lost My Teeth

    PLEASE HELP I HAVE LOST MY TEETH!!!! Thrusday night I missed placed my teeth, They are whitish with a little tobacco staining and there were three of them. My have left them at southside billiards or at the truck stop in Richmond Hill. I would like to get them back it is hard to eat, anything but soft food. And my tobacco does not like to stay in place. There is a reward they are my good luck chram PLEASE HELP ME FIND THEM!!! Call xxx-xxx-xxxx ask for Jim

    I … just …

    Ew.

    Thanks to Kati for the submission!