You Suck at Craigslist

Author: drmk

  • YSaC, Vol. CLXVI.v

    A bonus for New Years Eve:

    flammable stuff for new years party!!!

    we are looking for stuff to burn for winterburn’s rockin new years eve party! desks, couches, christmas trees, anything that will go up in righteous new years flaming glory! contact dan winterburn @ xxx-xxx-xxxx. asap!!!

    1665

    I’m going to file this one under “this can only end badly”. In fact, I think I might actually need to start a tag for that.

  • YSaC, Vol. CLXVI

    Adult toys

    My collection of adult toys is woefully poor. If you have some toys you no longer need give me reply.

    Ew. Just … ew.

  • YSaC, Vol. CLXV

    This is behind a cut because it’s long. Trust me, it’s worth it though!

    All the tenants I interview aren’t good enough

    (more…)

  • YSaC, Vol. CLXIV

    what kind of guy rejects a married woman??

    just curious

    The kind of guy who doesn’t want to have to sneak out the back door with his pants around his knees when the husband/family member/friend comes home unexpectedly?

    Wouldn’t the more appropriate question be, “What kind of guy doesn’t reject a married woman?” And luckily, we’ve seen the answer to that question.

  • YSaC, Vol. CLXIII

    tax deduction

    do you need a tax dedution? my daughter needs her teeth pulled. she is in her 20 and she needs all her teeth pulled. if you know a dentist that will do charity work or if you want to help her and take it as a tax dedution let us know. thank you

    Candace sends this one along with this note: “I wonder if I show up with some pliers and Tylenol…do you think that would count as helping? I was just telling my friend the other day, “You know, I love to pull teeth, and I could really use a nice dedution!”

    Hm.

    So many questions, so few capital letters. Okay, first: what is a 20, and why is your daughter in hers? I mean, I know what a 40 is, but I don’t think I could fit in that, much less in a bottle half that size.

    Second, what on earth have you been feeding your daughter if she is in her 20s and needs all of her teeth pulled? I’m guessing this might be the very first time this poor girl has been to a dentist in her entire life.

    Third: how exactly do you propose to have your daughter eat afterwards? You do realize you’re going to need to replace those missing teeth with something, right?

    Fourth: how would this qualify as a tax deduction? As far as I know, you’re only allowed to deduct medical expenses for qualified dependents. Would paying for someone else to have their teeth removed qualify as charity? If so, would anyone out there be willing to pony up for me to have liposuction? You can deduct it from your taxes! (Note: I am not a qualified tax preparer, and this statement should not be considered as tax preparation advice.)

    Fifth, and possibly most important: how did this person manage to spell “deduction” right in the headline, and misspell it twice in the ad itself?

  • YSaC, Vol. CLXII

    Car Seats……..2………..Free

    I have 2 cars seats…..free. My son has out grown these and moved up to booster seats.

    one is a Mark Martin #6 NASCAR seat….royal blue.

    the other is tan/brown neutral colors.
    Clean Smoke Free home. Could use a wash.
    I WILL NOT SHIP OR DELIVER!!!

    The only way I will hold them is if you bring me a 24 pack of Miller Lite!

    162

    Way to fail to defy stereotypes, Mr. NASCAR man.