You Suck at Craigslist

Tag: unclear on the concept

  • YSaC, Vol. CLXIX

    Sex Coaching for Women and Couples – Free!! m4mw – m4w – 47

    Does your sex life go like this?
    (more…)

  • YSaC, Vol. CLXVIII

    Looking for a car? What better place to look than on Craigslist? I’m sure we can find you exactly what you’re looking for.*

    1997 Pontiac Grand Am – $400

    1997 Pontiac Grand Am runs good but wont start. I don’t know whats the matter with it,need it gone asking 400. Trades are acceptable

    168

    The car runs fine as long as you don’t do anything foolish, like trying to start it. But who would try to do that anyway? That’s just crazy. Think about it — if you never start the car, you’ll never drive it, which means you’ll never get into an accident! It’s really a safety feature!

    No? Okay, maybe you would prefer this one?

    1991 lincoln town car – $1000

    the car is in good condition the transmission has no reverse thr car needs a sterrin collom and a grill

    I mean, how often do you really need to go in reverse? And “sterrin colloms” are optional equipment, right?

    * Provided that what you’re looking for is a piece of crap.

  • YSaC, Vol. CLXVII

    $50 Pier 1 Gift Card – more than 40% off! – $30

    $55 Pier 1 gift card. We don’t shop here and got it for our wedding. Will trade for an equal value card to somewhere else or sell for $35 or best offer. Cash pick up [location].

    This must be the result of that “new math” I’ve been hearing so much about.

    Happy New Year, everyone!

  • YSaC, Vol. CLXIV

    what kind of guy rejects a married woman??

    just curious

    The kind of guy who doesn’t want to have to sneak out the back door with his pants around his knees when the husband/family member/friend comes home unexpectedly?

    Wouldn’t the more appropriate question be, “What kind of guy doesn’t reject a married woman?” And luckily, we’ve seen the answer to that question.

  • YSaC, Vol. CLXIII

    tax deduction

    do you need a tax dedution? my daughter needs her teeth pulled. she is in her 20 and she needs all her teeth pulled. if you know a dentist that will do charity work or if you want to help her and take it as a tax dedution let us know. thank you

    Candace sends this one along with this note: “I wonder if I show up with some pliers and Tylenol…do you think that would count as helping? I was just telling my friend the other day, “You know, I love to pull teeth, and I could really use a nice dedution!”

    Hm.

    So many questions, so few capital letters. Okay, first: what is a 20, and why is your daughter in hers? I mean, I know what a 40 is, but I don’t think I could fit in that, much less in a bottle half that size.

    Second, what on earth have you been feeding your daughter if she is in her 20s and needs all of her teeth pulled? I’m guessing this might be the very first time this poor girl has been to a dentist in her entire life.

    Third: how exactly do you propose to have your daughter eat afterwards? You do realize you’re going to need to replace those missing teeth with something, right?

    Fourth: how would this qualify as a tax deduction? As far as I know, you’re only allowed to deduct medical expenses for qualified dependents. Would paying for someone else to have their teeth removed qualify as charity? If so, would anyone out there be willing to pony up for me to have liposuction? You can deduct it from your taxes! (Note: I am not a qualified tax preparer, and this statement should not be considered as tax preparation advice.)

    Fifth, and possibly most important: how did this person manage to spell “deduction” right in the headline, and misspell it twice in the ad itself?

  • YSaC, Vol. CLIX

    FREE STUFF… ALL GOOD STUFF..COME GET IT!!!

    I PUT OUT SOME STUFF THAT YOU CAN HAVE FOR FREE. THERE IS A ROSE COLORED CHAIR. EVERYTHING ELSE IS GONE. IT IS LOCATED AT [location redacted]. WE ARE NEXT TO JOHN’S AUTO PARTS IN THE MOBILE HOME PARK. WE ARE IN THE VERY BACK, 2 BLOCKS FROM POLK. IT IS IN THE FRONT OF MY HOME ON THE CURB, SO YOU DON’T NEED TO COME INTO THE YARD. IF YOU NEED HELP LOADING IT, JUST KNOCK ON THE DOOR. I WILL DELETE THIS POSTING WHEN IT IS GONE. ITEMS HAVE BEEN SITTING OUTSIDE AND MIGHT NEED SOME CLEANING, BUT OTHER WISE IT ALL WORKS FINE. THANKS FOR LOOKING…..SEE THE PICTURE…..

    159

    What amuses me about this is that by the time she got around to taking pictures of the free stuff on the curb, it had already been sitting outside long enough to have accumulated a thick layer of snow. And who wouldn’t want an upholstered chair that has had four inches of snow on it?

    Submitted by Martha — thanks!