You Suck at Craigslist

Tag: ew.

  • YSaC, Vol. CXCV

    ** TIFFANY & CO ** Necklace & charm set! heart tag style!! – $1

    This is a brand new never worn authentic Tiffany & Co sterling silver bracelet and necklace set. The retail value for this set is OVER $500. I’m lettin this set go for $300obo. Included are necklace, bracelet, 2 pouches, bag, box, and cleaning cloth! It’s Christmas so don’t miss out on this exclusive gift for her!

    This item is available for pick-up only!!

    There’s nothing really wrong with this ad itself, other than that there’s a little too much excitement! in! the! description!! But no, the hilarity comes elsewhere. Let’s look at the pictures, shall we?

    195b

    That’s okay … it’s a good display of the jewelry; it’s tough to take a close picture in focus if you don’t have a good macro lens, so we can forgive that. Moving on …

    195c

    Nicely displayed so you can see everything … but … what’s the display on? That’s not … could it be? No, it couldn’t, could it?

    (more…)

  • YSaC, Vol. CLXVI

    Adult toys

    My collection of adult toys is woefully poor. If you have some toys you no longer need give me reply.

    Ew. Just … ew.

  • YSaC, Vol. CXXXII

    Infant Cereal

    I have 5 un-opened boxes of baby cereal. 2 Rice and 3 Oatmeal. One has a best by date of Oct 31, 2008 but I am sure it is still fine. The others do not expire until Jan and Feb 09. Email me if interested. Thanks.

    Because if your baby could have a wish on Thanksgiving Day, wouldn’t they wish for expired Oatmeal?

  • YSaC, Vol. CXXI

    ****Nacho Cheese Fountain****

    Okay, wait. Stop right there. Does this really sound like a good idea to anyone? Those three words should NOT be strung together (in any order) under any circumstances I can think of.

    Let’s see how badly this is going to end …

    (more…)

  • YSaC, Vol. LXXVI

    Free Baking Supplies

    5 one lbs cans and 17 cans of one lbs of Crisco Vegetable Shortening. Freshness not guaranteed, great for baking, animal feed supplement, lubrication material. No delivery or reservations, must take all. Cans go to first person who calls and picks-up. Call ASAP.

    That’s right, call as quickly as you can for these 5 1-lb cans and 17 1-lb cans of not-guaranteed-fresh Crisco, which is great for feeding to people, animals, or lubing up your truck.

    Must take all 5 and 17 cans of possibly-spoiled solid vegetable lard.

    Ew.

  • YSaC, Vol. XXV

    Box of soy nuts

    There is a giant box of soy nuts at the corner of Rose and E. Park. Please take it and eat it!

    Is it really a good idea to pick up food that’s been left on a street corner? That aside, am I supposed to eat the soy nuts themselves, or the box? I can’t tell.