You Suck at Craigslist

Author: drmk

  • Apologies …

    … for the lack of updates this weekend. Real life interfered, as it sometimes does, and I was unable to do my usual trolling of Craigslist.

    As always, if you find something on Craigslist that deserves to be memorialized here, feel free to send it to yousuckatcraigslist at gmail dot com.

  • YSaC, Vol. LVI

    Free Chair

    This is a flying chair. I went many adventures on it. Come take it away have you happy adventures.

    Um. Right. Okay then.

    Actually, I stopped going on “happy adventures” in college after that time I found myself licking the bottom of a bag of Cheetos. But thanks anyway.

  • YSaC, Vol. LV

    Maid – $100

    House sitter, Baby sitter,house keeping, hi dusting, and floor care.

    Ah, “maid” service. Is that what the kids are calling it these days? Then I probably don’t want to know what hi dusting is, do I?

  • YSaC, Vol. LIV

    Also sent in by SJ, who appears to have been trolling the “Barter” section recently:

    Legal Help By A Laywer Not A Paralegal For Barter

    I Will Barter My Legal Help For:
    Car Repairs On A Cadillac Deville, Lincoln
    Painting A 3,000 Sq. Foot House
    A Good Running Car
    New Roof On House
    PS3
    X-Box
    WII
    Or Any Other Barter On This Order

    Apparently Laywers Not A Paralegal Must Type With Capital Letters At The Beginning Of Every Word. Also Apparently Laywers Not A Paralegal Have No Idea How Much Things Cost.

    Here’s A Hint, Mr. Laywer Not A Paralegal: My New Roof Cost $4500. An X-Box Costs Under $500. Those Are Not On The Same Order.

    Oh, by the way: it’s spelled lawyer. Unless you spent three years in Lay School. Wouldn’t you love to see this guy’s briefs? (Oh, shame on you! I was talking about his Laywer Briefs.)

  • YSaC, Vol. LIII

    The syntactic ambiguity of this headline is what pleases me the most:

    Home entertainment system for stripper pole – $300

    I have a 5 pc. in home surround sound entertainment system priced at used value $300.00 . I am looking for a portable stripper pole with base. Base needs to fit through a regular doorway on its side at least.

    This was found in the “barter” section. Because really, if you have a stripper pole, who needs any other type of entertainment?

    Sent in by SJ — thanks!

  • YSaC, Vol. LII

    COOL WEIRD TREASURE

    tried to have yard sale last week, rain…
    have been a collector of old cool stuff for years, making my escape to warmer climate, it all must go. i’m not selling a lot of furniture so if that’s what you’re looking for you might want to skip this yard sale. but if you are looking for a black madonna print, a vintaqge silk wedding kimono, an 80 candle candelabra, bull horns, victorian steamer trunk, old mirrors, stained glass, vintage marrionettes, etc, etc, etc… stop by. all yard-sale priced, not ebay priced!

    You know what’s weird in this listing? Not the black madonna print, not the 80-candle candelabra, not the bull horns. (Okay, maybe that’s a little weird.) No, the really weird thing about this listing is the dog wearing the vintage silk wedding kimono.

    Submitted by AM — thanks!