YSaC, Vol. 1752: Until The End of The World

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I bought a Soda and it had a promotion for an extra one for free but I am diabetic and can only drink one soda a day so I don’t need this extra one. I like game shows so it goes to the third response I get.

Uh oh. The only possible explanation for this is that the poster here is psychic, and knows the world is going to end before tomorrow. *PANIC, YOU FOOLS!* And have a soda. *NOW PANIC SOME MORE!!*

Oh, wait – this was posted in March. Never mind, false alarm.

Thanks for the post, Kit!

Comments

26 responses to “YSaC, Vol. 1752: Until The End of The World”

  1. CapnMac Avatar
    CapnMac

    So, that is why CL is poluted with all those “You’re getting a check for [large amount] just send back a money order for the difference” email scams.

    Gee, thanks, Sparky.

  2. Dave and Ferret Tribe Avatar

    (1)

    Well, I’ve got an extra bottle of soda pop.
    You’ve got some space in your fridge.
    I think that we should get together,
    Or is that too far a bridge?

    (2)

    It’s the end of the world; so says Sparky.
    It’s the end of the world; so says Sparky.
    It’s the end of the world; so says Sparky.
    So have some pop.

  3. meeshybee Avatar
    meeshybee

    The world may be ending, but I have to make sure my sugar isn’t too high. St. Peter checks your A1C before he lets you in the pearly gates, so he’d know if you cheated.

    1. C"From Behind.....Suddenly"J Avatar

      *pats meeshybee on head*

      Poor dear…you’re number three.

      Welp! Was nice knowin’ ya!

      Dibs on meeshy’s coffee slices!

  4. Lou Stool Avatar
    Lou Stool

    And since Meshy is gone, I’ll just have to yoink that soda.
    *edit* Nesting fail. 🙁

  5. MissMommyNiceNice Avatar
    MissMommyNiceNice

    Well, if the dieabeetus doesn’t get you, the Yellow #5 will. Nice knowing you!

  6. Windrose Avatar
    Windrose

    Here, hold my soda and watch this.

    Hammy, Punchity Punch Punch! Myself, Punchity Punch Punch! Ow.

    Note to self: Get helmet back from puppy before self-punching.

    Good morning, Chronic Consumers!

  7. camille Avatar
    camille

    If only someone would invent a sugarless soda that diabetic people could drink…

    1. limelolly Avatar
      limelolly

      It’s called dihydrogen monoxide and it’s a killer too.

      1. nojazzhere Avatar
        nojazzhere

        Knock, knock….
        who’s there?
        Banana….
        Banana who?

        Knock knock…
        who’s there?
        Banana….
        Banana who?

        Knock knock
        who’s there?
        Orange….
        Orange who?

        Aren’t you glad I didn’t say Banana again?

        1. Brer Fox Avatar
          Brer Fox

          No, I want more bananas. More please.

        2. Demon Duck of Doom Avatar
          Demon Duck of Doom

          Yes, we have no bananas.

    2. capnmac Avatar
      capnmac

      [corey]Not all persons with A1C issues can simply switch from “sugared” to “sugarless” versions of their food and beverages. Current research seems to suggest that there is a mental component involved. But, that could just be a paleolithic response to stress triggers, too. Which is why the research is on-going.

      I know in my own case that artificial sweeteners generate a stronger blood glucose response than natural sweeteners.

      Oh, and while many things with artificial sweeteners are labeled “diet,” recent, actual medical research (as opposed to diktat from ‘nutritionists’) now suggests that using artificial sweeteners actually increases cravings for foods with actual, honest, disaccharides–the opposite of the intended effect.

      Nutritionists, above, is quoted as a result of a recent long study of the published material on the topic. It turns out that actual qualifications are only a very recent thing; one merely had to self-identify as a nutritionist to be “qualified” as recently as ten years’ ago. So, rather a large quantity of published ‘nutritional’ information was not the result of medical training, peer review, or even minimal human testing. The business of a “low fat” diet being good for a person was born out of wartime food shortages and rationing, not actual medical studies. The first “food pyramid” was created by a staffer in the US Department of Agriculture, who may have had a degree in Political Science. But, their primary ‘qualification’ was having a knack for graphics and a sinecure under the SecAg.

      Sigh.
      [/corey]

  8. Demon Duck of Doom Avatar
    Demon Duck of Doom

    Translation: I bought this cheap off-brand pop because the store was trying to unload it, but the first one tasted like weasel piss, so I guess I’ll try conning some gullible fellow Sparky into thinking they won something.

    1. limelolly Avatar
      limelolly

      ::snerk:: weasel piss

      I really don’t want to know what that tastes like.

      1. Windrose Avatar

        I want to know how Ducky knows.

      2. Brer Fox Avatar
        Brer Fox

        soda POP! goes the weasel piss.

    2. One Moving Violation Avatar
      One Moving Violation

      The off brand pop I bought tastes icky. I don’t know what weasel piss tastes like. If it tastes like edible body paints, that would be close. Not from my own experience, just heard it on the weasel line. I’ll just pawn it off on my ex-brother in-law who is now my nephew. He can’t smell, so as long as it’s carbonated, he’ll drink it. You know, because, smell and taste are tied together.

  9. HamCan Avatar
    HamCan

    Sparky is just being law abiding, if the promotion and said “another” instead of “extra” we wouldn’t be having the snarkversation.

    1. capnmac Avatar
      capnmac

      This quite true.
      As a general rule, beverages are not know for their entrepreneurial skills. Yet, this one managed to talk Sparky into a BOGO. And, as oft happens, “buyers remorse” has set in, finding out how, after trading a good milking cow for magic beans, the legumes are not, in fact, supernatural in the slightest.

    1. One Moving Violation Avatar
      One Moving Violation

      Windy, you have two “BooB”s in your link. Just saying, discretion is the word of the day.

      1. Brer Fox Avatar
        Brer Fox

        “&camp”

        This one time, in BooB camp…

  10. Brer Fox Avatar
    Brer Fox

    You know, if you live in a very small place like I do, then what food I buy that I don’t eat that day, I gotta get rid of on CL. Anybody want some smoked oysters and peanut butter sammich?

    1. npjazzhere Avatar
      npjazzhere

      Are the smoked oysters already on the peanut butter sammich?…or do I have to assemble that myself?….’cause, uh, y’know…effort, work, whatever….(I’m getting tired already)

      1. Brer Fox Avatar
        Brer Fox

        *yawn* Yes.

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