I am selling a team mobile cell phone. you could use this as a replacement when yours breaks or lose it. i am only asking $30 big ones. call xxx-xxx-xxxx or email me at redsox[xxxx]@yahoo.com
That’s right, Sparky. All of the promotional material, all of the commercials with Catherine Zeta-Jones, even the phone itself that you took a picture of — ALL of them have the name of the company wrong, and you are the only one who has gotten it right. It’s Team Mobile. Right.
Never mind the fact that this phone is an old enough model that I can’t find any reference to it on the T-Mobile page OR the Samsung website, and that you want $30 for it. Or that you refer to dollars as “big ones”. (Or that you’re in New Jersey and have a Red Sox email address. With Yahoo.)
Go Team Mobile!
Edited because I forgot to upload the pictures. D’oh!
Most of this ad is behind a cut because it’s long. The devil in this one is in the details, and are there ever details! Be sure to click to read the entire ad.
Build a new, rational, primitive but free life w/ me in Alaskas wild – m4w – 27
WHO
Me:
– Status: 27 year old single white male. Never married. No children.
– Physical: 6’0″ tall, 160 pounds. 21 Body Mass Index. No physical handicaps or allergies
– IQ: 138 (Informally tested)
– Financial: $4,500 in unsecured debt. $500 in assets
– Education: High school diploma, Associate’s Degree. No plans for future formal education
– Religion: Atheist
– Psychological: Bites finger nails, drinks a little too much, uses pornography more than would like to. Sought treatment for “sex addiction.”
– Criminal: One arrest (carrying a concealed weapon without the government’s permission).
– Demeanor: Serious, sensitive, direct, quiet. Myers-Briggs type: INTJ (more…)
GRAMMA PAST AND LEFT HER DENTURES COULDN’T SEE THEM GO TO WASTE. ALITTLE STAINED(GRANDMA WAS A SMOKER) IM SURE THEY CAN BE CLEANED UP SHE ONLY WORE THEM TO DR APPOINTMENTS SO THEY NOT ALMOST LIKE NEW!!! SERIOUS INQUIRES ONLY WILLING TO CONSIDER TRADE FOR GOOD LAPTOP
PLEASE EMAIL FOR FITTING APPOINTMENT EVENING TIMES MORE CONVIENENT FOR ME
THANK YOU AND HOPE THAT WE CAN HELP SOMEONE OUT KEEP IN MIND GRANDMA WAS PETITE SO THEY WILL PROBABLY NOT FIT A BIGGER PERSON FREE HALF A TUBE OF FIXODENT AS I HAVE NO USE FOR IT
PLEASE DONT FLAG ME
I think this might be worse than the catheter bag and enema table. These were actually in this woman’s mouth — not to mention that she SMOKED with them in. I’m getting tongue cancer just thinking about it.
Edited to add: Now that I’ve had my caffeine today, I realized we may have solved the problem that this woman and her daughter were going to be facing.
I prefer the amateur tiats myself. The professional ones charge too much.
This looks more like a cross between a jester and Medusa. The gold things on the left are definitely jester tassels, but the things on the right sure look like snakes to me.
And it’s tough to tell, since they don’t include important things like dimensions in their post, but it looks pretty big. I’m not sure I’d want something that creepy hanging in my house.
dont have too much to barter. i can fix things around your house or make a kick ass meatloaf. just need the ferrai for one night. promise i will try not to get oral sex in it.
thanks
Heather sends this in, saying, “They post it in “barter,” yet they admit they have nothing to barter. Oh, and how exactly does one “barrow” a Ferrari? It seems that “barrowing” carries a high chance of oral sex. Hm…”
The wording of the “promise” is amusing, also. Notice that it’s not, “Promise I will not try to get oral sex in it,” it’s “promise I will try NOT to get oral sex in it.”
In other words, there’s going to be so many people offering him oral sex that he will have to try really hard to avoid them all.
This just has “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off” written all over it. (Minus Cameron, which is too bad. Cameron is the heart of that movie. Yeah, yeah, I know, it’s about Ferris, but Cameron is the only one who grows as a person and learns anything about himself over the course of the day. Plus it’s Alan Ruck, and he’s just cool.)
Anyway, for those of you with Ferraris, this young man with nothing to offer you but breaded meat would like to barrow your car, probably take it for a joyride, and try not to get oral sex in it. What could possibly go wrong with this plan?
