YSaC, Vol. 225: I think that’s Tip #242.

2009 February 28

Books and other things


Free books
-New American Standard Bible/Updated Edition with maps, still in box
-The Time of Christmas, The Time of Easter, The Time of the Church Parents Guide, Activity Books and CD great for Sunday School or home schooling
-battery operated pencil sharpener
-Girl scout beanie
Stop the Meeting I want to Get off by Scott Snair
-269 amazing sex tips and tricks for women by Anne Hooper & Phillip Hodson
-Readers Digest Condensed Books Volume One 1984

Also search [name] for lots of inexpensive things on sale

225

So let’s see … you’re a good, wholesome person, giving away a bible and Sunday school materials … and a book on “269 amazing sex tips”.

I don’t think I want to know how the pencil sharpener fits in there.

I am amused at the new, euphemistic meaning a book with the title of Stop the Meeting, I Want to Get Off takes on in this context. I mean, I’ve wanted to do that in meetings before, too, but I can control myself.

36 Responses leave one →
  1. 2009 February 28
    Olson permalink

    …and the beanie…totally a sex prop…
    (Do people really buy used sex tips books…Isn’t that kind of….ew???)

    Adores: 0
    • 2011 October 16

      Depends how many of the pages are stuck together.

      Hello corner, it’s been a while.

      Adores: 5
  2. 2009 February 28
    Jackie permalink

    I very nearly got the chance to find out whether I could successfully perform the Heimlich maneuver on myself. I really should know better than to eat or drink while reading this blog. The last paragraph of the commentary almost caused me to inhale popcorn.

    Adores: 1
  3. 2009 February 28
    Courtney permalink

    I always get off in meetings. Is that not appropriate? I always wondered what the stares were about…

    Adores: 4
  4. 2009 February 28

    I think this is one of those alternate universe situations: the “Sex tips” book is just an an empty box made to look like a book where she hides her money.

    Adores: 0
  5. 2009 March 1
    bonni permalink

    Advice from a former used-book store worker: if you ever buy books about sex, do NOT write your first AND last name (along with your partner’s first AND last name!!!) inside the book. (This rule should be followed whether you resell your used “Bondage 101” book or not. Oh, Amy S. and John F., I’ll always wonder if you moved on to B102 or not.)

    Adores: 10
  6. 2009 March 1
    Elle permalink

    I actually found this one refreshing. I mean, Christians have sex, too… where do you think they get the minivans full of kids? Lots of Bible-readers are probably also Kama-Sutra-readers. This is just one of the few who is comfortable enough to post them on CL.

    Adores: 2
  7. 2009 March 2

    Elle is right. Some Christian churches even *encourage* couples to enjoy sex! Believe it.

    Adores: 2
  8. 2009 March 2
    drmk permalink

    Hey, I’m all for enjoying sex. I just needed to point out the sex book to make the joke about the “Stop the Meeting” book.

    Adores: 4
  9. 2009 March 3
    Colleen in MA permalink

    o my gosh – i’m cracking up in my cubicle *snort* thanks for the laugh!

    Adores: 1
  10. 2009 March 3
    bonni permalink

    The “Stop the Meeting” juxtaposition did make me laugh a lot. It’s a pretty wrong title all the way around. (On the other hand, the worst-named business book of all time has got to be the one called “Orbiting the Giant Hairball.”) Now what would be REALLY great is if all those listed books were contained within that single volume of the Reader’s Digest Condensed Book . .

    Adores: 5
    • 2011 October 16

      I figured that “Orbiting the Giant Hairball” would be IF’s tribute to “Black Hole Sun,” or maybe one of the less well known episodes of Red Dwarf.

      Adores: 3
  11. 2009 June 16
    Kit permalink

    Girl Scout beanie? Are we positive this isn’t a diary of one person’s spiritual journey from increasingly weirder sects of Christianity, to cookie-based Judaism, to tantric sex meditation?

    Adores: 2
    • 2011 October 16

      I wouldn’t mind a religion based on cookies. I can get behind worshipping dessert.

      Adores: 3
      • 2011 October 17
        Windrose permalink

        Yeah, perhaps our Messiah spent Forty Days in the Dessert Buffet. 8)

        Adores: 0
  12. 2011 October 16

    I’m more curious why they are suddenly selling the Bible, the sex-tip book, and the Stop the Meeting book.

    Are they denouncing Christianity and quitting their dead-end 9 to 5 office job to live a life of abstinence in a small hut somewhere in the forest?

    Or have they gotten so good at piety, sex, and running effective meetings that they no longer need the books for reference?

    Adores: 9
    • 2011 October 16

      But… But… why the beanie?

      Adores: 3
      • 2011 October 16
        LimeLolly permalink

        The beanie is for modesty.

        Adores: 2
      • 2011 October 16
        Grampdaddy permalink

        Umm, an alternative to “Tee-shirt time”?

        Adores: 3
      • 2011 October 16
        MandaB permalink

        Because…y’know…Thin Mints…

        Adores: 9
        • 2011 October 16
          CapnMac permalink

          Probably Then Mintz

          Adores: 1
        • 2011 October 16

          They must really like the tingling sensation.

          I’ll just scoot right on over to the corner.

          Adores: 2
  13. 2011 October 16

    But…Isn’t two, sixty-nine only one amazing sex trick?

    Adores: 3
    • 2011 October 16

      What you’re describing is the “71”. That’s “69” with two fingers up the…

      *WHOOSH!*

      That is darn near instantaneous. Zero to corner in nothing flat.

      Adores: 5
      • 2011 October 16
        Windrose permalink

        Smedley, how do you like the new padding in all the corners? I’m sure our insurance claims will decrease now!

        Adores: 1
        • 2011 October 16

          Very nice! Almost makes the deceleration trauma peppermint bicycle.

          Adores: 1
    • 2011 October 16
      Grampdaddy permalink

      2,69 is 10 cents less than 2,79 – which is an exceptionally good price for an amazing sex trick.

      Or thin mints.

      Personally, I’m more into Shortbread but Grampmommy refuses to even discuss it.

      Adores: 5
  14. 2011 October 16
    MandaB permalink

    Seems obvious to me: Too much getting off in meetings makes you go blind. Then you can’t read the books anymore.

    Adores: 11
    • 2011 October 16
      Grampdaddy permalink

      That’s why they call them “Staff Meetings.” As in, “Run it up your flag pole and see who salutes.”

      Adores: 4
  15. 2011 October 16

    As long as we’re talking about the unfortunate implications of book titles, I thought it was a huge sin for anyone except Andy Schlafly to update the Bible.

    Adores: 2
  16. 2011 October 16
    Windrose permalink

    Five years of being the Cookie Mom will drive a person off their merit badge. 8/

    Adores: 3
  17. 2011 October 16
    Windrose permalink

    There’s something DaFT about the box today. Good thing it’s just been cleaned.

    Adores: 3
  18. 2011 October 16
    funky "eMonkey" monkey permalink

    Mini Monkey was in the Scouts for a short while, I guess she never made it to beanie level. So I’m not educated in the meaning of beanie symbols. But that little figure, just, I don’t know, why on a Girl Scout beanie? It looks like Aztec caveman art. Or some scary voo doo thingy.

    Also, I think I have the Reader’s Digest Condensed Books Vol One, 1984. It’s underneath the leg of an old broken table that Hubby has yet to fix for me.

    Adores: 1
    • 2011 October 16

      I think the little figure is an elf or sprite or some such. When I was a Brownie (back in the dim and distant past) each pack was organised into groups named after such things.

      Seem to have mislaid those corey tags again.

      Adores: 0
      • 2011 October 17
        Windrose permalink

        Right, RW. When I joined scouts, you started as a Brownie (hence the brown beanie and uniform) then progressed to Junior and Cadet, I may have missed a step. Anyway, now a girl can become a scout in kindergarten, at the Daisy level.

        Adores: 0
  19. 2011 October 17
    Windrose permalink

    Dave, Ferrets, Punchity Punch Punch!

    G’Night, West Point!

    Adores: 0

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