YSaC, Vol. 379: Do you, insert name here, take insert name here …

2009 July 31

Wedding Invitations (Blank) – $100


5×7″ pink and brown cardstock ready to be made into wedding (or other) invitations. Paper has pretty butterfly and flower design. I have enough materials for approx. 150 invitations, including ribbon to assemble, as well as blank white response cards.
379

I think the email exchange between Leslie and me is the best possible commentary:

Leslie: BLANK wedding invitations, you say? Blank, that is, except for the NAMES boldly emblazoned across the bottom – “Becky and Tim”.

I’m getting married soon, and this seemed like such a good deal. Being cautious of those kooky Craigslisters out there (thanks to your blog), I thought it best to first inquire as to this young ladies definition of “blank”. You guessed it – blank means “blank except for our names on the front”. She was quite the “Helpy Helperton”, though. She offered several suggestions as to how I might overcome this very minor issue. After asking if it was possible that my name was Becky and my fiancee’s name was Tim, she informed me I could either cross it out and write our names underneath or simply put a sticker over it and write our names on that.

Yeah, this seems like just the right way to start out your new lives together. Maybe we should just change our names to Becky and Tim.

YSaC: Please tell me that the “blank” response cards also say “Becky and Tim” on them … because that would be awesome.

Leslie: Well, I suppose if you’re already crossing out the names on the front….what’s a few hundred more on the “blank” response cards?

My aggravation got the better of me, so I opted to send Becky the link to the Webster’s definition of “blank”.

She responded with “so you aren’t interested in the invitations?  This is a real money saver.”  I pray my sanity holds fast so I don’t have to use my daily allotment of curse words on one person.  I don’t even think I need to ask why it is that things didn’t work out between with she and Tim’s nuptials.  I’m sure your IQ must fall a few points each day when you live with someone like that.

Team Tim!

YSaC: Hang onto her email address. You’ll need it when you send her a link to the entry on the blog!

Leslie: Oh, I fully intend to link her to the posting.  I’m from the South, so anytime we do/say something about someone else that’s not so kind, we just begin or end the sentence with “Bless Her Heart”.

Yes, bless her heart.  Bless her sweet, sweet, unsure of the meaning of “blank” heart.

Thanks for the post & emails, Leslie! This is the fourth or fifth submission of Leslie’s that’s made it on the site, so I think it’s time to start an “LC” tag — keep bringing us the crazy!
79 Responses leave one →
  1. 2009 July 31
    PrincessLuceval permalink

    Oh, and not to mention they’re butt ugly. Pink and brown wedding invitations? What do the attendants’ dresses look like? Bless her heart, indeed.

    Adores: 0
    • 2009 July 31
      jackie31337 permalink

      I actually quite like the combination of pink and brown, but I’m not sure about the color scheme for wedding invitations either.

      Adores: 0
    • 2011 April 9
      Bombdude permalink

      This color scheme and “art” work remind me of… Nevermind, I’m not even gonna stoop that low today…

      Adores: 0
  2. 2009 July 31

    Bwahahaha! Thank goodness Becky chose to include a photo of the aforementioned “blank” invitation. Otherwise someone could have ended up with a rather nasty surprise.

    Adores: 3
  3. 2009 July 31
    Pete permalink

    In her mind, the conversation was probably going to go like this:

    “Are they really blank, or do they have your name on the front?”
    “Well, our names are on the front, but you can always…say, any chance your names are Becky and Tim?”
    “Hot christ, I didn’t even think of that! Those are our names! I’ll be right over!”
    “Bye Becky! Bring cash!”

    Adores: 17
  4. 2009 July 31
    Colleen in MA permalink

    Becky, honey, sometimes you just have to let some things go…

    Adores: 0
    • 2010 July 31
      Steph permalink

      She’s trying to. For $100.

      Adores: 2
  5. 2009 July 31

    $100 for THAT? have a feeling i could make my own very easily and choose my own materials without “crossing out” someone else’s names

    Adores: 2
    • 2009 July 31
      jackie31337 permalink

      That’s what I was thinking, too. I don’t remember paying much more than $100 for our wedding invitations, and they were actually printed with our own names, and the date and place of our wedding.

      Adores: 3
  6. 2009 July 31

    “so you aren’t interested in the invitations? This is a real money saver.”

    LMAO.

    Adores: 3
  7. 2009 July 31

    wow…
    and for the record, Target has make your own invitation kits for like $20 that include ribbon as well. and they are actually blank.

    Adores: 3
  8. 2009 July 31

    wait i just noticed the “(or other)” part of the post…
    that is perfect because my birthday this year is going to be Becky and Tim themed!

    Adores: 26
    • 2009 July 31
      drmk permalink

      That’s a hilarious idea, actually, because then everyone could walk around saying, “Oh. My. God. Becky. Look. At. Her. Butt.”

      I’ll expect my pink and brown invitation in the mail forthwith.

      Adores: 16
  9. 2009 July 31

    This has officially become my favorite entry. I can’t even imagine a taker even if it was posted under the “free” section but to actually try to sell invitations with the couples name engraved on the front? I agree with Colleen. Sometimes you really need to cut your loses and put things in the trash where they belong. The groom AND the invitations.

    Adores: 0
    • 2009 July 31
      drmk permalink

      Personally, I think I’d keep the groom and ditch the bride. Team Tim!

      Adores: 7
  10. 2009 July 31
    Lola permalink

    I think I know why the marriage didn’t go forward. If someone thinks something is blank even when it has names on the front, then maybe they also don’t quite grasp the concept of cheating either: “But, Timmy, he didn’t put it in ALL the way …” Bless her heart.

    Adores: 28
  11. 2009 July 31
    flaco permalink

    For $100, she could at least put the string in the card herself. If I pay her $110, will put the stickers over the names, too?
    To be fair, though, it is possible that she just ordered more invitations than she needed, and she and Tim had a lovely ceremony after all. Or maybe not.

    Adores: 2
    • 2009 July 31
      Windrose permalink

      Hot christ! Not. Bless her heart.

      Adores: 8
  12. 2009 July 31

    I like to imagine that she got these lovely invitations home and discovered a “small” problem, like the groom’s name is Tom or she spells Becky with an i. Being too lazy to take them back or to put a little sticker over the names, she has decided to see if she can get someone else to put a sticker over the names.

    Honestly, a $100.00 for near-blank, ugly brown invitations– does she think someone planning on a big wedding (150 invitations!) is going to be happy with her choice of color and style? Really these cards should be free– and even then I doubt anyone in their right mind would want them.

    Adores: 1
  13. 2009 July 31
    Lisa Sue permalink

    I would totally take them if they were free. You could just cut off the names at the bottom and use them for scrapbooking or homemade cards. I don’t think the pattern is ugly for non-wedding uses. So, I am sure she could get takers with free. Maybe even $10.

    Adores: 2
    • 2009 July 31
      Eutychus permalink

      Hmm. First I was thinking Lisa Sue isn’t really entering into the spirit of things here. Then it occurred that Lisa and Becky are within a whisker of a win-win negotiation. If we could just work out a price …

      Team Bless Their Hearts!

      Adores: 13
  14. 2009 July 31
    Rebecca permalink

    Well, our names are Rebecca and Timothy, but Becky and Tim might have just that right touch of formality one wants in a wedding. I think I’ll take ’em.

    Adores: 11
    • 2010 July 31
      Steph permalink

      Oh, yes, that’ll be PERFECT! And then, in keeping with the same formality, Elizabeth and Robert can have their invitations emblazoned with Betty and Bobby. Or Beth and Bob! Something alliterative. Alliteration is always awesome, after all!

      Adores: 4
  15. 2009 July 31
    woofless permalink

    Hmm…I like the way KP is thinking of the “other” possible uses for these blank-but-not-quite-REALLY-blank cards.

    Hopefully Becky will hang on to these. Because as SOON as I end up pregnant with opposite-sex fraternal twins, I’m naming ’em Becky and Tim, JUST so I can take advantage of this “real money saver” instead of spending a fortune on baby shower invitations!!!

    Pink and baby-sh*t brown really aren’t bad color choices for a baby shower, right??

    Adores: 5
    • 2009 July 31

      Team other uses!

      Adores: 0
      • 2009 July 31

        I’m thinking they look more like Depression Era wallpaper. Maybe you could wallpaper one (smallish) wall?

        Adores: 1
        • 2009 July 31

          so very, very tempted to photoshop that

          Adores: 4
  16. 2009 July 31

    Just cut off the bottom of each invitation. Not that hard.

    Adores: 0
  17. 2009 July 31
    Leslie permalink

    I think it’s too little, too late for Becky and I to do business now. Hot Christ!

    I was actually willing to work with the colors…but I just couldn’t see adding the extra cost of changing our names to the cost of having a wedding.

    Maybe I was wrong to be so hasty. Bless my heart.

    Adores: 3
  18. 2009 August 1

    If they were free, then I would take them and donate them to the local school. They could cut the bottoms off and let the kids make stuff with them. Team Other Uses!

    Adores: 2
    • 2009 August 1
      drmk permalink

      I can get on board with Team Other Uses or Team Cut Off the Bottom if they’re free. For $100 I want them to say drmk & dan.

      Adores: 5
      • 2009 September 17
        sweetbiscuit permalink

        i’m sorry, maybe i’m not quite getting how stoopid people are in this world, but for &%#@`s sake, just give them to your local kindy.

        Adores: 0
      • 2015 March 6
        Tankerbell permalink

        I want mine to say drmk and Dan on them, too!

        Adores: 0
  19. 2009 August 1
    kgfyou permalink

    With that font, you might be able to get away with it if your names are Becky & Jim…. just sayin. Hot Christ!

    Adores: 2
  20. 2009 August 1
    brashieel permalink

    For free (or nearly free) I can see someone taking these. Maybe just as card supplies, maybe by a couple that’s trying to pull off a semi-classy wedding on the cheap.

    But $100 is pretty close to the price of professionally printed invitations. So… fail.

    Adores: 0
    • 2009 September 16

      I don’t know exactly why, but “semi-classy wedding” is cracking me up. Like they wanted to have a classy wedding on the cheap, but didn’t feel like making the effort. In which case, Becky’s generous offer is exactly what they need.

      Adores: 2
  21. 2009 August 1
    melissa permalink

    this would have been perfect about 4 years ago when my cousin tim was planning his wedding to his (now) wife Becky.

    Adores: 3
    • 2009 August 2

      You could always advertise on CL for a time machine for very cheap, and make everyone happy!

      Adores: 3
    • 2010 July 22
      Sweet permalink

      waaaay late, but, useful for invitations to your cousin’s anniversary party? oooor, he could stock up on ‘anniversary cards’ for her for the next hundred years!

      Team Becky and Tim forever!

      Adores: 2
    • 2011 April 9
      Eleven permalink

      Quick, Melissa – into the TARDIS! To Cousin Tim’s c2005! *whoooosh whoooosh whoooosh whoooosh*

      Adores: 4
      • 2011 April 10
        Laurelhach permalink

        Damn, missed him again…

        Adores: 1
  22. 2009 August 1
    Maria permalink

    I’ll bet my entire collection of scrapbooking papers (all two of them) that she made these herself. Study, if you will, the tell-tale hole-punch method of inserting a lame string as a ribbon… the shape-cut pattern on each side of the butt-ugly paper, and the careless use of the phrase “card stock.” Perhaps somewhere else on CL is a “blank” rubber stamp that just happens to say “Becky & Tim” in wedding script?

    Adores: 1
    • 2009 August 1
      dogface permalink

      Does that mean you won’t buy my handmade wedding invitations made with my flocked and foiled rockstar scrapbook paper, Hello Kitty stickers, and scraps of weird ribbon I found? And I’m guessing you’ll look down on my use of gel pen in writing the “blank” names of the bride and groom…. :c

      Adores: 1
  23. 2009 August 1
    Stella permalink

    Leslie –
    Bless your own heart…you have done a good job mangling English grammar yourself.

    Adores: 0
    • 2009 August 1
      drmk permalink

      Um, she wasn’t complaining about anyone’s grammar.

      Adores: 7
  24. 2009 August 2
    Jane permalink

    It was funny until the report about chasing her down in email to snark at her there, which made me uncomfortable. Hoping that won’t be a regular thing.

    Adores: 0
    • 2009 August 2

      Clearly you haven’t seen what utter asshattery is out there. http://www.yousuckatcraigslist.com/?p=1944

      Adores: 0
    • 2009 August 4
      Jen permalink

      I’m sort of feeling like if you are arrogant enough to think that you can, and expect to, get $100 for wedding invitations printed with someone else’s names, and have the audacity to call them “blank”, you’re asking for a bit of snarking. This person chose to post these on Craigslist–it’s tantamount to declaring open season on one’s self.

      Of course, that may just be my frustration with stupidity talking.

      Adores: 6
    • 2009 August 6
      Tim permalink

      Agree with Jen… the seller had it coming in spades for calling that blank, selling it as such, and trying to defend it.

      Adores: 2
    • 2009 August 19
      Jane Lane permalink

      WOAH! Imposter Jane! Settle down! FTR, it’s not snarky if you are stating facts and are in no way calling the person names and/or making rude remarks towards that person.

      This is my new favorite post, btw.

      Adores: 1
  25. 2009 September 16

    i actually KNOW a couple named becky and tim. too bad they’re already married…

    Adores: 1
    • 2009 October 23
      SwissKat permalink

      They could use the invitations for their 50th wedding anniversary.

      Adores: 1
    • 2011 April 9
      Lara permalink

      They could get married again. Just for fun.

      Adores: 2
  26. 2010 April 30
    Cameron permalink

    OK, so I’m catching up on old posts hence the 9 month delay….

    I’ve been dragged to a couple of bridal shows with my bride to be, and one of the photographers had a sample photo album with both our names on them. So it’s possible that some couple somewhere could use these invites.

    Of course, according to the ad poster, it would help if their names were “Blank.”

    Adores: 1
  27. 2011 April 9

    I am getting an ad for the most mind-blowingly hideous wedding invitations ever. Bless the manufacturers’ hearts.

    Adores: 3
    • 2011 April 9

      They look like “Animal Crossing” stationery to me. (The ad, not the hideous wedding invites.)

      Adores: 0
    • 2011 April 9
      Lara permalink

      Those are crazy ugly. I think you send those if you want your guests to be blind before they attend. It solves the issue of fitting into your wedding dress.

      Adores: 1
  28. 2011 April 9

    Am I correct in thinking that they ground Woodstock into pulp to make Cardstock?

    Adores: 1
    • 2011 April 9
      Windrose permalink

      Hammy, bless your parts, no. Just no.

      Adores: 1
      • 2011 April 9

        Well, then they must boil cardigans to make cardstock?

        Adores: 0
    • 2011 April 9
      Lara permalink

      Do you mean Woodstock the confused bird or a crowd of naked muddy high people?

      Adores: 1
      • 2011 April 9

        I went to Naked Muddy High, I graduated “magnum, oh lordy!”

        Adores: 0
  29. 2011 April 9

    “Oh Tim, I found the perfect invitations for cheap on the Craigslist!”

    “Sara, why are you calling me Tim? You know my name is Randall”

    “It’s because of the invitations, they’re blank with only the names on the outside. Oh, and start calling me Becky.”

    “Can’t we just get invitations that are actually blank or have our names on it, Sara?”

    “I said call me Becky. And no, this is just simpler Tim.”

    Adores: 6
    • 2011 April 9
      ghostcat permalink

      “Honey, have you been skipping your medication again?”

      “Don’t be silly. Now help me shave the sofa, I can’t find my snake.”

      Adores: 6
      • 2011 April 9
        Lara permalink

        If you can’t find your snake then you are either Becky or you need to go to the doctor immediately.

        Adores: 1
  30. 2011 April 9
    CapnMac permalink

    Why is it that I am afraid, sore afraid, to go see if “becky and tim” is a euphemism in the Urban Dictionary?

    Adores: 2
    • 2011 April 9
      Laurelhach permalink

      Because you’re an intelligent being.

      Adores: 0
  31. 2011 April 9
    Lara permalink

    I can’t believe it! I was actually here for this one the first time! I feel like a true YSACer now. I don’t know how to describe the feeling. Pecil

    Adores: 2
    • 2011 April 9
      Lara permalink

      I was wrong. I must have just read this when I first found the site. I feel silly as a pecil.

      Adores: 0
      • 2011 April 9
        Windrose permalink

        Proof that you are a true YSaCer! Que the confetti!

        Adores: 1
  32. 2011 April 9
    Windrose permalink

    Sllloooooooowwww day here. What if we all checked our local CL for an ad posted in the last three or four days, and posted the link here? Now, if it’s something really good, you want to save it and send it as a submission. But something funny but not terrific? Perfect!

    Adores: 0
  33. 2011 April 9
    Windrose permalink

    Taco, is this you?

    GROW TRON

    http://sandiego.craigslist.org/nsd/grd/2315003685.html

    Adores: 0
  34. 2011 April 10
    Windrose permalink

    One Sock Puppet Punchity Punch Punch!

    G’Night, Becky and Tim!

    Adores: 0

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.