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YSaC, Vol. XIX

Written by

drmk

in

Looking for discreet married lady – m4w – 51

I’m looking for someone like me, married and want to have a secret discreet affair,this could be a one time thing or on going from time to time.Looks and race is not important,BBW friendly.I’m a white male gl, friendly,very clean and honest and so should you.Your dissection assured.If interested please get back to me.Thanks

What if I don’t want to be dissected?

I especially don’t want to be dissected as an ongoing from time to time thing. I mean, if I’m going to be dissected, I really only want it to happen once.

At least it’s assured. I won’t have to wonder.

Comments

32 responses to “YSaC, Vol. XIX”

  1. Glampers Avatar
    Glampers

    The “BBW friendly” part makes me think “skin suit”.

    o_O

  2. Amy Avatar
    Amy

    OMG – I was thinking the exact same thing! 🙂 “It puts the lotion on the skin…..”

  3. Random Person Avatar
    Random Person

    What is a “gl”? (I’m not a regular reader of personals.)
    And how does “honest” square with “I want to cheat on my wife”?

  4. drmk Avatar
    drmk

    gl = goodlooking, I believe.

    Can’t help you with the second one.

  5. Random Person Avatar
    Random Person

    It’s kind of sad. He actually spelled “discreet” correctly. But then… “dissection”? I can only guess he meant “discretion” – though he still wouldn’t be using it right – but how can you be able to spell “discreet” (twice!) and get “discretion” so wrong?

  6. drmk Avatar
    drmk

    And that’s what makes me think he was looking for a science project. Either that or his spellchecker has a really twisted sense of humor.

  7. Random Person Avatar
    Random Person

    So, probably he just left some words out. “GL, friendly, very clean and honest, and extremely creepy. Your dissection assured.”

  8. AG Avatar
    AG

    how can we have a discreet affair and be honest at the same time… that really doesn’t work

    1. emsies Avatar
      emsies

      He’s probably a politician. If so, it isn’t really dishonest to have an affair, since his wife should probably just assume it is going to happen… if she doesn’t understand that, well, she’s lying to herself, and who’s the dishonest one NOW???

      The “discreet” part is just polite; why embarrass his long-suffering wife if he doesn’t have to?

  9. Windrose Avatar
    Windrose

    “friendly,very clean and honest and so should you.” So should I WHAT? May I buy a vowel? Oh, dear, it’s just so hard to figure this one out. 8)

  10. Noodles Avatar
    Noodles

    I agree with you AG, where’s the honesty here?

  11. Stephanae Avatar
    Stephanae

    I’ve always wanted to have an affair (or optional one-night stand) with an honest married man who thinks that spaces are optional after punctuation and wants to dissect my discreet self into discrete parts after it’s all over. I’m so sad to be single, now, since he’s only interested in married women.

  12. Dave and Ferret Tribe Avatar
    Dave and Ferret Tribe

    very clean and honest and so should you

    Look for Sparky’s unflinchingly honest yet discreet new book, I Am Very Clean and Honest (and So Can You!).

    1. Demon Duck of Doom Avatar
      Demon Duck of Doom

      Wait… Sparky is Stephen Colbert?

    2. D / DM Avatar
      D / DM

      Oh-ho-ho. Looks like somebody left there Graigs List dictionary behind. Sparky doesn’t even now how to spell “discrete.”

  13. Limelolly Avatar
    Limelolly

    I’m terrible at keeping secrets, so…. while you’re at it, just hand me your bank information, and I’ll put together a portfolio to give your wife. There’s just not enough pictures of you, Sparks. I can help.

  14. TacoMagic Avatar
    TacoMagic

    Thanks for the sex, it’s been a real slice.

    1. D / DM Avatar
      D / DM

      It’s just sex. It’s not brain surgery.

      OR IS IT?

      1. ghostcat Avatar
        ghostcat

        Can’t operate on what he doesn’t have.

  15. HamCan Avatar
    HamCan

    Apparently it takes a lot guts to cheat on your wife…

    1. D / DM Avatar
      D / DM

      I did it once, but only once. Her heart really wasn’t in it after that.

    2. One Moving Violation Avatar
      One Moving Violation

      I don’t even have the guts to cheat on my solitaire games.

  16. Demon Duck of Doom Avatar
    Demon Duck of Doom

    You have to believe me, honey, it was never my INTENTION to buy an ad soliciting regularly scheduled ugly-bumping sessions with a random stranger (looks not important as long as gl)….. it just kind of happened.

    1. ghostcat Avatar
      ghostcat

      He was really trying to sell a chipper-shredder and the ad accidentally got changed and posted in the personals section. It must be a computer glitch.

      1. One Moving Violation Avatar
        One Moving Violation

        “glitch”, gl itch
        a good looking itch I just have to scratch.

  17. D / DM Avatar
    D / DM

    very clean and honest and so should you

    In Soviet Russia, honesty cleans you!

  18. One Moving Violation Avatar
    One Moving Violation

    Huh, he’s 51. He’s a card short of a full deck. Can’t really play around seriously with that.
    He should wait another year…. Oh wait, that was 4 yeaers ago. Now he’s playing with to many cards. Definately a cheater, watch your pocketbook.

    1. One Moving Violation Avatar
      One Moving Violation

      Why do I keep spelling definitely definately? All of my clues got bored and left, so if any of you know, please tell me.

      1. Demon Duck of Doom Avatar
        Demon Duck of Doom

        How many yeaers ago did they get bored and leave?

        I barely notice “definately” anymore. That seems to have defiantly become the new preferred speeling. I always think of “finite” with some little bits tacked to each end. Makes it easier to remeber, but then I always forget to put that second m in “remember”.

        1. One Moving Violation Avatar
          One Moving Violation

          Many, many years ago when I was twenty-three.

  19. One Moving Violation Avatar
    One Moving Violation

    BBW?
    Builda Bear Workshop?
    Big Bad Wolf?
    Buxom Blonde Women?
    Big Boned Wombats?
    Better Banana Wafers?
    Brown Bath Water?
    Before Barry White?
    Beer Battered Wallabies?
    Badly Bent Wire?
    Why can’t people just spell it out for me. I’m not a rocket surgeon you know.

  20. Windrose Avatar
    Windrose

    Lou Stool, Dave and Ferret Tribe, Limelolly, One Moving Violation, ghostcat.

    I think I’m out of crowded box jokes. Punchity Punch Punch!

    Good Morning, First Wives Club!

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