On this, the most romantic of days, I bring you some of the people out there who are wookin’ pa nub in all the wrong places, including Craigslist.
Watched the news lately? – 48
Seeking a lady that is aware of what the future will bring. A survivalist. I would like to find a lady who is under 50 and capable of growing a garden and first aid. A lady that can operate and take care of a horse, tractor, a truck, and an ATV. Must be capable of self-defense! Trapping, reloading and knife sharpening skill is a plus! Looks not too important besides being in good physical shape although big t*ts are a plus. Must currently be self-sufficient! If you have any equipment, send photo and description. We’ll see about the relationship discussion after we get past these requirements. I hope you like the smell of diesel! Smoke or drink, OK. No drugs! Don’t be scared, reply back to me! Criminals, gays and blacks need not apply. Not my flavor
What flavor are gays? To me, it seems like they’d be minty.
And you know, if your t*ts are too big, you won’t be able to sharpen knives very well. They also seem like they might be a hindrance in the whole “tractor and ATV” thing.
All right, ladies, maybe he’s not your type. Let’s try this one:
Would you like to star in an episode of “Cheaters”? – 26
Things are nonexistent in the bedroom with my wife. I’m looking to have a little fun, and maybe even my 15 minutes of fame. You could get your 15 minutes too. Not from me, I don’t last that long. I mean on camera. Think of how fun it will be meeting for coffee early in the morning, sneaking away from work or school for a secret “lunch”, and meeting late at night in the parking lot of the Kroger or HEB. All the while, we can play “spot the camera” or “spot the night vision goggles”. If you’re worried about how the wife will react when she sees us fooling around, don’t be. Her wrath will be directed only to me. While I’m getting my ass kicked, you can use that time to pose for the camera or tell your story of how you were the real victim in all this. The only requirement is that you are a woman over 18. I want to be on “Cheaters”, not “To Catch a Predator”.
Morally corrupt, but not bankrupt. At least the man has ambition.
No? Wow, you folks are picky. Okay, how about this one?
29 Guy looking for a good friend – 29
i like to stay in shape.treat girls to a very nice dinner.i like to do lots of outdorrs things since im a surveyor.i been so many places.i have been to almost every amusment park in the usa and one in tokyo.you name it i done it.i dont have no tatoos and dont drink but will go to clubs.i dont do drugs.i like to keep my bills caught up 2 months ahead.im just looking for some company and a good friend.on another note i do get girls starring at me all the time so you can not get mad if they look but i never cheat and never will thats my moddle.my sis says im to sweet to girls.i just say i want to the girl to feel like a princess when she is with me.i never hit a girl and never will.feel free to email me and ill give you my number and we can talk and if we hit it off just maby you might be dating me.please send me a picture with your email to my email.
Girls, if you’re lucky, you might be dating him. And his ego. But at least he has a moddle. I had a moddle once, but it got muddled. Once you get your moddle muddled it’s all over.
All right, gentlemen, all right, I hear you saying, “But what about us? Help us out in the romance department too!” Ask, and ye shall receive. For you, I have selected this fine young thang:
Looking for love, in the world… of warcraft – 18
I am 5’9, green eyes, have dirty blone hair, 110 pounds, full c cups, and an applebottom ass. I enjoy world of warcraft and rap music. Looking for a cool and funny guy with atleast a level 80 World of Warcraft toon. If you wanna hook up send me a pic and a link to your armory page.
She knows what she wants, and she knows how to get it.
And in the spirit of inclusivity (unlike our first potential love match):
To The Girl Whose Vagina I Saw – w4w
Hey baby, I saw your vagina at my house once.
Ditch my brother and get with me 😉
I’m only a room away, you know where to find me!
This was posted under “Missed Connections.” I always thought lesbian mating rituals involved cats, not piglets. But hey, that’s a really nice carpet; I wonder if it matches the drapes.
So there you go, folks; a cornucopia of romantic possibilities. No need to thank me: I’m a matchmaker at heart. Happy Valentine’s Day!
Thanks to the submitters: jwc, trueredtx, Lesley, and Kim.
price reduced on BEAUTIFUl prom/pageant gown stand out at prom
I paid over 400 dollars for this dress. it has beautiful detail on the top and all along the bottom. not itchy at all. has been taken in in different places but can be let out or taken in more. it is a size 6 originally. PLEASE make me a reasonable offer. you are MORE than welcome to come by and try it on or have a closer look. truly a one of a kind dress. I had random people taking pictures becasue it was such a beautiful dress. email xxxxxxxxxxxx2107@yahoo.com with questions or comment. CASH ONLY and the top comes off
Shawna sent in this post, saying:
Overall, not a horrible post. It’s just… Well, first, the dress looks fairly bridal. I’m glad it’s not itchy at all, I guess. I feel COMPELLED to make a reasonable offer, perhaps after COMING BY to try it on. And you know, if I had “random people” chasing me down to snap photos, that would make me very uncomfortable. Also, who is the zoot suit creep on the lamp post? And why?
Finally, and most obviously, pay cash “and the top comes off”? Nice. That’s a motivated seller.
I’ll bet she did stand out at prom.
[ /Shawna]
This post brings me to a question. I’m somewhat of a language wonk, if you haven’t noticed. Little linguistic things really interest me, like regional variations between pop and soda or bag and sack. It’s because the rest of my life is so exciting, I’m sure, that I focus on things like this in my down time.
Anyway, I know that in parts of the US the construction, “I went to prom” is more common, but where I grew up, I went to THE prom. Saying “I went to prom” seems to me like saying, “I went to store.” My husband says, “Ours had a qualifier — you went to Senior Prom or Junior Prom.” Even then, I would say, “I went to THE Junior Prom” instead.
I have a sneaking suspicion I’m in the minority; a Google search for “I went to prom” returns over 31,500 hits, while a search for “I went to the prom” returns a mere 19,000. Luckily, the Google search also returned this blog entry on the topic, which makes me feel a little bit better — I’m not the only person who overthinks these things.
How about you folks? Did you go to prom, or did you go to the prom?
And did you take your top off for cash at [the] prom?
do u need hair extension ? i need a foot massage, pedicure. and fren – $1500
Hi my name is rene I do hair extensions for model, strippers,porno stars, etc. The best virgin hair w the best techniques. I need u to do my pedicure. Foot massage, frenchtip. These job have to be done at my home. If you do not have the skills to do it , do not try to practice on me, but if you have a talking bird it would be acceptable.
Of course it would. Talking birds make everything better. Not even remotely qualified to perform surgery? Get a talking bird, and you’ll be doing appendectomies in an hour. No idea how to repair cars? You need yourself a talking bird! Incapable of shooting from the three-point line? Talking bird.
Too bad I only have Tahiti Sam … I’ll never get to practice my mad pedicure skillz.
Straight from the back roads of Vermont. 30″ sq.
Great novelty item for garage or basement!
Pick up only.
If interested please email.
Is this like one of those 3-D things where you have to stand the right distance away and cross your eyes before you see the hidden image of Elvis? And is it the thin, pre-war Elvis or the old, bloated Elvis? That makes a big difference.
Man, I can never get those things right. All I see is a cow.
