YSaC, Vol. 592: One fish, two fish, red fish, micro fish …

2010 March 1

Vintage Micro Fish Reader – $5


Vintage Micro Fish Reader. These were used to look up property, taxes and this sort of thing before computers. This one is in mint condition and would make a great conversation piece. $5

Sara: I don’t know about you, but i’m truly excited at the thought of conversing over people in olden days looking at tiny sea creatures.

drmk: What does it say about me that I really, REALLY want this??? I want to buy it and turn it into a fish tank.

Sara: Perhaps the best idea I’ve heard in a while! Just make sure you use smaller fish, LOL.

Thanks, Sara!

155 Responses leave one →
  1. 2010 March 1

    From there to here, from here to there, teeny Abe Vigoda is everywhere.

    Adores: 8
    • 2010 March 1
      Lola permalink

      It took me forever, but I just got this (not caffeinated enough to click on the link). Awesomesauce.
      Not only is everywhere, he’s not dead yet, either.

      Adores: 0
      • 2010 March 1

        Abe Vigoda will forever be Fish to me.

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 1
          TacomMmagic permalink

          This is of course forgetting Michael Fish, who is the penultimate Fish in my book… of fish.

          Mostly because of how obscure a reference he is to anyone in the states.

          [Hah, made you Google!]

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 1

          Ah, and then there’s Stanley Fish, the literary critic. I once saw someone else quoting a Stanley Fish piece on Paradise Lost in a sentence that began, “According to Fish God does not…”

          Putting a comma after Fish there probably would have been clearer, but it would have spoiled the apparent appeal to the authority of Dagon.

          Adores: 8
        • 2014 August 30

          It’s spooky how clever some ppl are. Thaksn!

          Adores: 0
      • 2010 March 1
        MrWhite permalink

        I’m sure you’ve all seen his recent Super Bowl commercial, but if not, here you go.

        Adores: 0
  2. 2010 March 1
    JuneJenny permalink

    Wow, I guess I need a fish reader. To think that for all this time I never realized that those tiny fish even had words *on* them!

    Adores: 25
    • 2010 March 1

      Words like “Property” and “Taxes.”

      Adores: 9
      • 2010 March 1
        GrahamT permalink

        LOLOL.

        Adores: 0
      • 2010 March 2
        mudslicker permalink

        The ones I see usually have words like “Darwin” and “IXOYE” on them. These fish can usually be seen on the backs of Volvos and PT Cruisers respectively.

        Adores: 5
  3. 2010 March 1

    In the tradition of McGuffey Readers, you can teach your school-aged fish to read overly difficult, culturally-expired nonsense.

    Adores: 4
    • 2010 March 1
      lost_compass permalink

      So this would be a McGuppy reader?

      Adores: 27
      • 2010 March 1
        TacomMmagic permalink

        So.. would McGuppy be taking a nibble out of crime then?

        Adores: 7
    • 2010 March 1
      TacomMmagic permalink

      I’m nominating “Culturally-Expired Nonsense” as today’s band name.

      Adores: 8
      • 2010 March 1
        Lola permalink

        Now at the 40 Watt, supporting their album School-Aged Fish.

        Adores: 3
  4. 2010 March 1
    mudslicker permalink

    {corey}

    Microfiche, and its close cousin microfilm, have been around for years. They are valuable research and archive sources in libraries around the world. A microfiche is a 4 by 5 inch (10.2 by 15.2 cm) piece of photographic film, containing printed information in a size too small to be seen by the naked eye. Books, journals and magazines are often archived on microfiche. The advent of microfiche allowed libraries to carry printed resources they would otherwise never have the floor or storage space to hold.

    {/corey}

    That being said, I like my fish baked—never micro’d. I hate the soggy factor.

    Regarding its selling points: It may be minty but I have to admit my conversations would never be so desperate as to need to involve this dust-collecting monstrosity.

    Adores: 7
    • 2010 March 1

      I think you’re underestimating the conversational power of the microfiche machine, Dr. mudslicker. I used to keep one prominently displayed in my living room for when I had girls over. They’d be all, “ooh, a microfiche machine! Do you happen to have any old volumes of the LA Times on there?” And I’d be all, yeah, right here, lemme show you how to scroll through… You can imagine what happens next.

      Adores: 24
      • 2010 March 1
        TacoMmMagic permalink

        They look up obits from August in 1977 to prove that Elvis never died?

        Not that this very thing has ever happened to me before.

        Adores: 4
      • 2010 March 1
        mudslicker permalink

        Microfilm machines make me all dizzy….it’s a low-tech electronic roofy I tell you!

        I can only imagine what would have happened next provided those girls could even read.

        Adores: 5
        • 2010 March 1

          Ahh yeah…

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 1
          TacoMmMagic permalink

          I know how to talk dirty to a girl like you Mudslicker:

          I pull out my Edison Cylinder, put it in the phonograph, and start spinning it; faster and faster until it begins emitting sound. Then, slowly, I begin to pull the cover off my typewriter, exposing every key one at a time. After I’ve bared my typewriter, I reach upwards and grip my stereocope, letting the 3d images fall upon your yearning eyes for only a fleeting, yet sensual moment. Sensing your growing excitment, I walk over to my daguerreotype camera, and in a flash, it’s over.

          So, was it good for you?

          Adores: 22
        • 2010 March 1
          sarajean80 permalink

          It’s the noise; right, mudslicker? That whirring sound is like catnip.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 March 1
          Lola permalink

          Taco: I think that if steampunk pr0n did not yet exist, that you have just invented it.

          Adores: 6
        • 2010 March 1
          TacoMmMagic permalink

          Even I must bow to the might of Rule 34.

          Adores: 3
        • 2010 March 1
          mudslicker permalink

          You had me at daguerreotype TMmM. I’m in virtual swoon now.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 1
          mudslicker permalink

          For some reason, whirring sounds always remind me of Stephen King sarajean.

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 1

          Even after some of my infamous exchanges, I caught myself feeling very sketchy and awkward while reading Taco’s post. No wonder they call you SexyFingers.

          Adores: 5
        • 2010 March 1
          Colleen in MA permalink

          Taco, that was hot.

          Adores: 4
        • 2010 March 1
          sarajean80 permalink

          It made me go all tingly.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 1
          Bacontini permalink

          Bacontini is vehemently opposed to such disgraceful filth being posted here by one such as you, so called TacomMmagic! It is offensive, derrogatory, entirely inappropriate, and exposes de fine ladies here to unseemly displays.

          What’s more, Bacontini is outraged dat he not tink of it first. De nerve of stepping in on his territory. Bacontini protest most vigorously!

          Adores: 5
        • 2010 March 1
          sarajean80 permalink

          Bacontini needs to calm down.
          Maybe you should make some tea.

          Adores: 1
    • 2010 March 1
      Lola permalink

      I was just going to mention this.
      [corey]
      Fiche and film are still being created in archival settings; it’s because it is stable if properly stored, and doesn’t require sophisticated technology in order to access the information – all that is required is magnification and a light source. In that regard it is considered superior to digitization and so forthI used to give that speech regularly because I worked in a project that created it from newspapers that were disintegrating.
      [/library-archives corey]

      In fact, the job I have now has a film reader, for old copies of the NY Times, Wall St Journal, NY Law Journal, and other fun reading. Not all of this is yet online. Our conversations about this aren’t what this person may think, however; they’re usually along the lines of “Oh crap, I have to use that thing again.”

      Adores: 5
      • 2010 March 1
        arallyn permalink

        Thanks to being at an old Normal School for a University, we have an entire room full of microfiche machines, as well as a full archive of old newspapers and periodicals. We also have a lone microfiche reader in our archive, too. I’ve never actually seen anyone using the big room full of readers, but it fascinates me that it’s still there and we haven’t downsized it or anything.

        Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 1

          I used to prefer using microfiche to online archives. I decided I should probably stop using it one day when I realized I was reading something that said “Made in West Germany” in the margins.

          Adores: 5
  5. 2010 March 1

    Wow this came in the nick of time for me. I was just about to pitch the last of my Micro-Fish Food, since Gargantua – the last of my micro-fish – died when someone forgot he was living inside the shot glass from Vegas and mixed him with a li’l tequila during a party last summer.

    RIP Gargantua…*sniffle*….I really thought I was over this.

    Adores: 15
  6. 2010 March 1

    And…sigh…how old am I that I remember using microfiche on a regular basis at work??

    Adores: 4
    • 2010 March 1
      Windrose permalink

      CJ, about as old as I am. I even remember the in-house filming set-up for the in-coming paperwork.

      Adores: 1
      • 2013 September 28

        At one point, early in my illustrious career, I was in charge of the telex machine for an international scale manufacturer. I picked up the ones to be sent and delivered the ones received to each department…by hand. Yep, them was the days.

        Adores: 0
  7. 2010 March 1
    Camille permalink

    There is something fichey about this ad.

    There are still plenty of libraries storing periodicals, pamphlets, and other stuff on microfiche and microfilm. The New York Public Library has tons of the stuff.

    Adores: 5
    • 2010 March 1
      Hartster permalink

      So do we, although the paper I work for is increasingly using PDFs. We do have a microfiche reader in our bureau, although there is no one who is using it (and no one who cares to use it.) We also have clip files, actual articles about and arranged by various subjects.

      But our PDFs only go back to late 2008. I dunno when microfiching stopped, but we also do have hardbound volumes of the paper.

      Adores: 0
  8. 2010 March 1
    Fleeting permalink

    OH Microfiche!! I was wondering what the heck they were trying to say! I’ve actually used one of these before for a school project. I was looking up land title records from the 1880s at the provincial archives building. That being said it would have been WAY more interesting if I could have done the project on micro fish instead.

    Adores: 2
    • 2010 March 1

      How would you get the words on something so small? Would it be like writing on a grain of sand or rice? You could always use the micro fish reader to see what you have written, but how would you correct typos? Is there a special kind of white out for micro fish?

      Adores: 4
      • 2010 March 1
        Lola permalink

        Micro white(out)fish. It’s a specialty in mini delicatessens.

        Adores: 8
      • 2010 March 1

        I think there might be a species of cichlid or wrasse that specializes in eating the typos off of other fishes’ scales.

        Adores: 9
  9. 2010 March 1
    TacoMmMagic permalink

    Throw the third switch.

    Not the third switch?

    Throw it, I say. Throw it!

    Life.

    Life, do you hear me?

    Give my microfish reader life!

    Adores: 8
    • 2010 March 1
      mudslicker permalink

      Another one of your horror novel themes? Killer Coelacanths From the Black Depths.

      Adores: 1
      • 2010 March 1
        Lola permalink

        I love coelacanths. “Modern world, we are not extinct after all.” 8)

        Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 1

          Yeah, screw you, superly-edumacated scientists!
          It’s so much better for me that the natives of the area thought the scientists were a bunch of nutcases. ‘dude, you mean those fish we’ve been throwing away for years? The really oily, inedible ones that are just a common nuisance? Yeaahh…there’s this preposturous French scientist over there who’s making a big deal about them. What a dork.’

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 1
          Lola permalink

          I know. I can just imagine the scientists’ letters (or maybe telegrams, given the era) to each other: “Dude, I’m telling you. Coelacanth. They are all over the damn place. No, I am not making this up. Yes, I am sober. Really. Yes, I know they are supposed to be extinct. No, I don’t know why they aren’t. All right, Monsieur Smarty-Pantalone, if it’s not a coelacanth, then what is it? Mmmm-hmmm. Thought so.”

          Adores: 5
    • 2010 March 1

      TMm or TmM or however you’re spelling it today, plus eleventy gazillion for the Young Frankenstein reference.

      Adores: 3
      • 2010 March 1
        TacoMmMagic permalink

        I’m just glad somebody got it =).

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 1

          It’s one of my favorite films. I was thrilled when my Lit225 (Science Fiction Literature) teacher found an excuse to show it in class a couple of weeks ago. I love that class.

          Adores: 1
  10. 2010 March 1
    sarajean80 permalink

    OT – I have to share this. I was going to the grocery store yesterday and there was a small cluster of Girl Scouts waving around boxes of cookies. One was dressed in a Thin Mint costume, a round brown thing with holes for her limbs and head. She was wearing a minty shell!
    I laughed so hard at that poor child, I thought the mothers were going to call the cops on me. I bought a box of cookies to make up for it.

    Adores: 16
    • 2010 March 1
      TacoMmMagic permalink

      At least you didn’t stop to take pictures. Jail for sure there.

      Adores: 1
      • 2010 March 1
        sarajean80 permalink

        I was tempted. Very, very tempted.

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 1
          TacoMmMagic permalink

          You know, parents don’t find it very funny if you grab one of their kids and run with them… even if it’s only for a couple of steps and you say “just kidding.”

          Talk about no sense of humor.

          Adores: 7
        • 2010 March 1
          lost_compass permalink

          …. or when you say “I just wanted to inspect her chassis. Is it DA?”

          Adores: 7
        • 2010 March 1
          sarajean80 permalink

          Inspecting a child’s chassis will get your name put on all sorts of lists.

          Adores: 3
      • 2010 March 1
        mudslicker permalink

        Then parents shouldn’t dress their kids up in costumes that only entrap you into wanting to lick their chocolate minty goodness.

        You’re very Tosh.0 today Taco…and I LIIIiiiike it!!

        Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 1
          TacoMmMagic permalink

          I haven’t had my coffee this morning. You think anyone noticed?

          Adores: 1
      • 2010 March 1

        I think we can all die now, since we have a musical number, artwork, clothing, coffee mugs and now sarajean has survived the epitome of YSaC awesomeness.

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 1

          I think we can all die now…

          If HHNF offers you coffee (or Kool-Aid) this morning, don’t drink it!

          Adores: 6
        • 2010 March 1
          TacomMmagic permalink

          Since Akbar isn’t here:

          It’s a trap!

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 1
          Lola permalink

          The best part about her experience was that she came upon it naturally, or organically, if you prefer. She in no way contrived to make this happen, and then suddenly she found herself in the presence of a minty shell. Brilliant.

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 1
          sarajean80 permalink

          I have never been so happy to run out of Cocoa Puffs.

          Adores: 4
    • 2010 March 1
      Camille permalink

      [corey] Technically, that was a chocolatey shell – the mintiness would be on the inside. [/corey]

      Adores: 4
      • 2010 March 1
        sarajean80 permalink

        It said “THIN MINT” on the back, so I’m sticking with “minty shell”, especially since she looked a little bit like a turtle.

        Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 1

          I agree with sarajean, it’s a minty shell and the child is the center. Okay, maybe it’s a chocolate minty shell but that’s still technically a minty shell.

          Adores: 3
        • 2010 March 1

          I wonder if minty shelled turtles would get along with micro fish if I put them in the same aquarium?

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 1
          sarajean80 permalink

          It would make for a better smelling aquarium than most.

          Sounds a little like a hunting scent; Minty Turtle.
          “From the makers of Frisky Ungulate, Baby Got Bass, and Croakin’ Casanova, it’s Minty Turtle! Because you care enough to smell your worse.”

          Adores: 3
        • 2010 March 1
          TacomMmagic permalink

          If only we could crossbreed the minty turtle with the Black Molly. Then we’d have a fish/turtle (Fitle? Tursh?) that both keeps the tank free of Algae, and leaves only the fresh smell of peppermint.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 1

          FISH + TURTLE = MUDSKIPPER

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 1
          mudslicker permalink

          HEY! HEY! HEY! There Mr. Smarty Pants.

          Mudskipper is just WAAAaaaayyyy too close.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 March 1
          TacomMmagic permalink

          How about a Mudkip then?

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 1
          Windrose permalink

          How about a Black Madonna?

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 1
          mudslicker permalink

          So what’s so wrong with…

          FISH + TREE + TURTLE = FIRTLE

          Is that chopped liver?

          (I have to admit, Mudkip is adorable….)

          And you changed your name AGAIN!!!!

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 1
          TacomMmagic permalink

          Eventually it’ll have so many Mm’s in it that it will implode in upon itself taking the comments section with it.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 March 1

          If I just had enough M&Ms left over from my science-fair experiment, I could run a simulation of that…

          How many ms does it take to get to the center of a fusion reaction?

          Adores: 3
        • 2010 March 1
          sarajean80 permalink

          The world may never know…

          Adores: 3
        • 2010 March 1
          BigUncleJohn permalink

          One, Two,
          Many more; too many to count.

          Adores: 7
  11. 2010 March 1
    PrincessLuceval permalink

    This will be *perfect* to use when my Sea Monkeys get a little bigger.

    Will I be able to watch them engaging in prawn?

    Adores: 7
    • 2010 March 1
      Lola permalink

      I think the prawn is sold separately – you have to show proof that you’re over 18 to obtain it.

      Adores: 1
  12. 2010 March 1
    tigprincess permalink

    sarajean: This reminds me of the card of two polar bears approaching an igloo (with inhabitants) and one saying “I love these , crunchy on the outside and chewy on the inside”.

    OK I don’t get out much, at least not on my own.

    The memories – microfiche – or how to lose your eyesight in 3 easy moves.

    My ads are for a cell phone (why?) and Hogy SoftBaits (WTF?)

    Adores: 2
    • 2010 March 1
      Lola permalink

      tigprincess – I think that’s a “Far Side” cartoon. They never get old.

      Adores: 1
    • 2010 March 1
      lost_compass permalink

      “how to lose your eyesight in 3 easy moves”

      Yes, when using the micro fish, always take a regular break. This is called going through minnow pause.

      Adores: 19
      • 2010 March 1

        Hm. Whenever I take that minnow pause, I get Shamu‘d Swings.

        Adores: 6
        • 2010 March 1
          Bianchi Sound permalink

          Shamu‘d Swings. Is that when it eats the trainer?

          *Crickets.

          *Boos.

          What, too soon?

          Adores: 7
        • 2010 March 1

          *falls on floor, shaking fists at stormclouds*
          TOO SOOOONNN!!1elebenty!

          Adores: 1
  13. 2010 March 1
    Windrose permalink

    Wha–Isaac? Again with the Don’t Suck box? *punchity-punch-punch* Hm, I guess you’ll make the Hall of Fame at this rate. 8)

    Adores: 0
    • 2010 March 1
      Lola permalink

      I can’t wait until he’s tied with TacomMmMmagic and then we can have the Don’t Suck-Off Championships.

      Adores: 7
      • 2010 March 1
        PrincessLuceval permalink

        That? Sounds incredibly filthy.

        Adores: 6
        • 2010 March 1

          Incredibly! I will need immoral support for that one.

          Adores: 3
        • 2010 March 1
          TacomMmagic permalink

          I’ll have to whip out my growing hoard of gingerbread zombies for this throw down.

          I have to make a comeback after Isaac trashed my dictionotomy with his wordsmithery.

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 1
          JuneJenny permalink

          If we’re going to have a Suck-Off, we should definitely include Graham and his massive link.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 1
          sarajean80 permalink

          Taco’s the one with the massive link. He shows it to EVERYONE.

          Adores: 3
      • 2010 March 1
        mudslicker permalink

        Tied with TMmM? Ooh…kinky!

        *making popcorn for the smackdown*

        Adores: 0
        • 2010 March 1

          I have no interest in watching a kinky Issac/TMmM smackdown.

          Unless you’re sharing that popcorn….

          Adores: 4
        • 2010 March 1
          mudslicker permalink

          I’ll share if you don’t mind that I’ve duct taped over the pic of Orville Redenbacher. His mug is a definite mood breaker for me any time I’m watching any sort of gladiatorial fight. SPQR—Strength and Honor!

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 1

          Since Graham isn’t here I’ll sub for him *ahem* and say, ‘Duct tape, duct tape, duct tape!’

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 1
          mudslicker permalink

          HHNF: I thought it was Duct Tape Nipples, Duct Tape Nipples, Duct Tape Nipples!

          Opening at the 40 Watt

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 1
          Lola permalink

          In college we had a local band known as Sweaty Nipples. Maybe that’s their current incarnation, after they get older and start making inexpensive DIY home repairs.

          Adores: 1
    • 2010 March 1

      Aww yeah. Lookit my chads, hella danglin and all.

      M&M cat-abacus says I’m up to 5.67 deciTacos, and gaining fast.

      Also, it says 13 Cinnamon-Turtleneck Gravies, but I think that’s a miscalculation.

      Adores: 5
      • 2010 March 1
        Windrose permalink

        Yeah, I think you hit the percent button by mistake.

        Adores: 0
        • 2010 March 1
          sarajean80 permalink

          I think it’s just a minor mistake in sign. You have to watch those positive tanktops when you carry the wind chill factor or they will cinnamon up into turtlenecks in a jiffy.

          Adores: 3
      • 2010 March 1
        Bianchi Sound permalink

        You didn’t carry the Orange Peel Lipstick Barrel Baloney Wagon.

        Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 1
          mudslicker permalink

          That’s only if he was dividing. If he’s multiplying, he needs to multiply by factors of red marmalade cadmium belt buckles.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 1
          Windrose permalink

          But then you have to add the Baloney Wagon back in, right? And solve for X?

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 1
          TacomMmagic permalink

          No, no, no. The Baloney Wagon is only added in on Wednesdays, and every elebendieth Saturday. On the first Monday of March on an even numbered year you have to subtract Gravey Covered Foam Taxas.

          Then instead of solving for X, you crumple the paper into a small ball and soak it in strawberry flavored Kool-aid for 3 days.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 1
          sarajean80 permalink

          But only if you’re out of curry powder. Otherwise it won’t make any sense.

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 1

          *muttering*

          Okay, so I carry the minty shellopause, subtract Abe Vigoda from both sides, factor out the kinky duct tape, and integrate the remainder of the swingset…

          This time I get Vicodin Tuna Casserole.

          That can’t be right.

          Adores: 4
        • 2010 March 1
          sarajean80 permalink

          As long as you have enough to share, who cares?

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 1
          Lola permalink

          Don’t forget, X = Hubert Humphrey. (Or was it Calvin Coolidge? Woodrow Wilson? Ronald Reagan? One of those presidents with the same first and last initials, anyway.)

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 March 1
          BigUncleJohn permalink

          issac said: “This time I get Vicodin Tuna Casserole.

          That can’t be right.”

          Yes, it is right. If you add Blind Date to Vicodin Tuna Casserole, you get 4-6 years; however, if you add Vicodin Tuna Casserole to In-laws you get Christmas with Your Parents; and, if you add Vicodin Tuna Casserole to Office Party, you get Extra Week Paid Vacation.

          Adores: 11
        • 2010 March 1
          FireManSteve-O permalink

          I find that the coefficient of minty being variable at different vintages is most easily explained when graphed across several planes. To wit, spinich toothpaste across the x-y axis divided by parabolic Vicodin Tuna Casserole gives you a value which is the square root of Hell’s seventh circle’s radius.
          This in turn gives us a parallel postulate, and calls into question Gödel’s (first) incompleteness theorem shows that many axiom systems of mathematical interest will have undecidable statements. No conclusion drawn. Son of a b@*^&.

          Adores: 5
  14. 2010 March 1
    Ladycrim permalink

    What’s REALLY sad is that I actually want to buy this as a prop for the next time my Rocky Horror cast performs ‘Shock Treatment’.

    Adores: 4
    • 2010 March 1
      sarajean80 permalink

      I was thinking it would make an awesome nightlight. I think I still have the X-ray they took the time I slipped on the ice and busted my knee and it’s probably close to the size of the screen.

      Adores: 1
    • 2010 March 2
      Meredith permalink

      Ladycrim, can I pleeeez haz kitteh? PLLLLEEEEEZZZZ????

      Adores: 0
      • 2010 March 2
        Ladycrim permalink

        Sorry, iz my kitteh! But if I find any more in the shed behind my office (seriously), I’ll let you know!

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 2
          Jane permalink

          My kitteh came from inside a couch sitting in a neighbors carport. Yah, we were classy that way. Still a cute kitteh though.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 March 2
          Bianchi Sound permalink

          You’re lucky the snakes didn’t get it first.

          Adores: 2
  15. 2010 March 1
    Hartster permalink

    If you buy this micro fish _reader_, you naturally will need a micro fish _writer_. I’m giving my Sharpie, slightly used, for free. You just need to send me $20 for postage.

    Adores: 3
    • 2010 March 1
      mudslicker permalink

      Micro fish writer (micro fish writer)
      Dear Sir or Madam, will you read my book?
      It took me years to write, will you take a look?
      It’s based on a novel by a man named Lear
      And I need a job, so I want to be a micro fish writer,
      Micro fish writer….

      Adores: 5
      • 2010 March 1

        It’s a finny story of a finny man,
        And his cleaner wrasse doesn’t understand.
        His tuna’s working for the Daily Scale;
        It’s a steady job, but he wants to be a micro fish writer…

        Micro Fish Writer!

        Adores: 10
  16. 2010 March 1
    TacomMmagic permalink

    Now I have no fish to set myself up as the sole expert on fish reading; however, there appears to be large void of knowledge that many here are floundering in.

    I know that it may seem that I’m going to perch on mahi soap box and let flow a tidal wave of useless information, but if you cod bear with me I will try to be as concise as possible. And, if you take the tide to listen, I’m sure you’ll sea that I’m not just pontificating for the halibut.

    Hmm, it appears I’m trout of time. I appologize fjord my lengthly introduction as it appears to have taken up all the time for the lecture. If you need any kelp understanding Fish Reading, or if I have piked your interest, please feel free to approach me at the reception. I promise that I won’t tuna you out, and I gill offer you whatever information I have.

    Thank you.

    Adores: 13
    • 2010 March 1
      mudslicker permalink

      Oh Taco…

      “Shut up. Just shut up.
      You haddock me at hello.”

      Adores: 4
      • 2010 March 1
        TacomMmagic permalink

        I had to pass up loads of good material just to keep that sucker at 3 paragraphs.

        Adores: 1
  17. 2010 March 1
    CapnMac permalink

    Well, all this does is conjure up a need for a macro “fish” reader with attendant worries that all the fluke content will be “Bite Me”

    Adores: 2
  18. 2010 March 1
    TacomMmagic permalink

    For GrahamT and HHNF:

    I got YSaC 559 up to 1001 comments. The picture of HHNF netting Graham is now earned.

    Huzzah!

    Adores: 5
    • 2010 March 1

      Well done!

      Adores: 1
    • 2010 March 1
      Lola permalink

      I was wondering how long that would take. Excellent!

      Adores: 0
      • 2010 March 1
        Windrose permalink

        1008 now. 8)

        Adores: 1
    • 2010 March 1

      Weeee are the champoins my frieeends. And we’ll keep on posting til the end…..

      Adores: 4
  19. 2010 March 1
    SilvaNoir permalink

    This one gave me the giggles. Who knew fish could read? ;)

    I wonder if everything is written in squid ink.

    Adores: 5
  20. 2010 March 1
    Bavec permalink

    I have a fish at home that can do much more than just look up property, taxes and this sort of thing! And it’s a great conversation starter, as well!
    Hmm…
    *thinks over possible double meanings of above comment*
    Naw, no one on this website has a dirty mind, do they??

    Adores: 4
  21. 2010 March 1

    If this has already been mentioned, just flog me.
    Did he post this just for the halibut?
    It’s minty!

    Adores: 3
    • 2010 March 1
      TacomMmagic permalink

      *repeatedly smacks HHNF with a carp*

      Adores: 1
      • 2010 March 1

        Oooh, this is fun….

        Adores: 1
      • 2010 March 2
        CapnMac permalink

        Fish Slapping Dance!!11!!

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 2
          CapnMac permalink

          And, during lent, too–ought get Double Score for that.

          Adores: 0
  22. 2010 March 2
    tigprincess permalink

    I’m loving the math but have noted that no-one as yet has taken account of parallel lines or pi or dodecahedrons. Surely these would skew the result in favour of the Peanut Brittle Peperroni Milk Shake solution?

    * random comment but delighted to report that my two mugs (llamanun and Not.A.Lion) have arrived safe and sound here in UK land. Let joy be unconfined and coffee rule the day.*

    Adores: 1
    • 2010 March 2

      Sigh….no matter how many times I erase the chalkboard and start over
      I still come up with – FortyTwoPancakeSammiches.

      I totally suck at cat math.

      On the other hand, I do seem to have come up with another band name.

      FortyTwoPancakeSammiches now appearing at the 40-Watt!

      Adores: 1
  23. 2010 March 2
    Meredith permalink

    Okay, missed you guys. Sorry I’ve been out of action, but I’ve just not felt bright enough lately to post anything biting or witty. I see that I’ve missed a lot, too.

    1). I WANT the lounger. If I could snap one up for 75 dollars that looks like that, It’d MMD.

    2). I am horrified to think that my panties are indeed large enough to use as doors. Time to call Jenny.

    3). Micro-fish is SO my new hypothetical band’s name.

    4). You guys are at times the only sunshine that breaks the bleak landscape of my existance.

    Adores: 4
    • 2010 March 2
      Lola permalink

      I’d been wondering about you. Welcome back, and please lurk even if you don’t feel you are up to posting. We’ll do our best to make you laugh/cringe. 8)

      Adores: 1
    • 2010 March 2

      I missed you, Meredith. Thanks for dropping in.

      Adores: 1
    • 2010 March 2
      Windrose permalink

      Meredith, be sure to check back for the Don’t Suck-Off! It’s going to be big!

      Adores: 2
    • 2010 March 2
      TacomMmagic permalink

      I missed you as well. As a professional stalker I do take notice when one of my vic-… clients goes missing.

      Adores: 2
  24. 2010 March 2
    Jane permalink

    We used to use microfiche readers in university, and they always gave me a nasty headache. I guess I must have a fiche allergy, so I’ll have to pass on this listing, even if it is minty.

    Adores: 2
  25. 2010 March 24

    Есть о чём задуматься.

    Adores: 0
    • 2010 March 24

      That’s what I said, but the Feds didn’t believe me.

      Adores: 3
  26. 2013 September 28
    One Moving Violation permalink

    My fish doesn’t need readers, he’s just a bit nearsighted. He keeps swimming into the tank wall.

    Adores: 2
    • 2013 September 28
      Brer Fox permalink

      My fish doesn’t need readers, he’s just been boned and filleted. He’s only half-baked so I’m waiting.

      Adores: 2
  27. 2013 September 28
    MissMommyNiceNice permalink

    My avatar approves of this post and finds micro fish a delicious and healthy snack.

    Adores: 3
  28. 2013 September 28
    One Moving Violation permalink

    Fiche heads, fiche heads
    Little micro fiche heads
    Fiche heads, fiche heads
    Let me read some.

    Adores: 6
    • 2013 September 28
      MissMommyNiceNice permalink

      Yum!

      Adores: 2

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