YSaC, Vol. CXCI

2009 January 25

hot chic from ohio in my computer class – m4w – 33


hi we r in same computer class at [abbreviated college name] ..u said u were form ohio , mason i beleve near kings island..i think u r the most sexiest woman i have ever seen .. the way ur shirt help tight against ur body showin ur nice firm tits.. and ur sexy body i would love ot lick up and down… if u think u knwo who u r what was the teacher jking about if u ever hung out withteh guy that did what at kings island?.. hit me up maybe we can hook up discreetly and talk or whatever

Any way this turns out, this is destined for disaster.

First of all, let’s assume that the girl sees this. Who would go out (or “hook up and talk or whatever”) with a guy who wrote this? And by “write”, I mean, “randomly poked at letters on the keyboard in a vain attempt to communicate.” And if she does see it — how uncomfortable is she going to feel in that class now? It would be enough to make me drop the class and file a harassment charge and restraining order, honestly.

Let’s be charitable, though, and pretend that the girl in question is somehow charmed by his description and decides to let him lick her up and down. They marry. They breed. See? Disaster.

Now let’s assume that she doesn’t see it, and remains blissfully oblivious to his romantic keyboard single-finger stabbings. It’s still a symphony of fail, with a suck encore.

Sent in by Cheryl — thanks!

23 Responses leave one →
  1. 2009 January 25
    Anonymous permalink

    I don’t understand…if she’s in his class why isn’t he “hitting her up” there?

    Adores: 1
  2. 2009 January 25
    Courtney permalink

    Because it’s easier to be crass and disgusting in anonymous print.

    Let’s say for a minute that she does see it and in all of that jumbled mess she recognizes herself. Let’s even go so far as to say that she’s flattered by it and not at all repelled. There’s a pretty good chance there’s more than one male in that class. How does she know which socially-stunted individual it is?

    Adores: 13
    • 2012 May 26
      Lou Stool permalink

      Well, I’d start by looking for the old dude in class. “Let’s see. 18, 19, 19, 18, 20, 22, 33. There’s my charming prince!”

      Adores: 1
  3. 2009 January 25
    drmk permalink

    There’s also less threat of rejection on Craigslist. If nothing happens, he can choose to believe she never saw it, and he never took the chance of being rejected by asking her out in person.

    Adores: 11
  4. 2009 January 25
    D / DM permalink

    @drmk:

    You are being pretty uncharitable with this one. You may not have noticed, but this guy spelled “discreetly” correctly.

    Adores: 2
  5. 2009 January 25
    drmk permalink

    As my grandfather used to say, “Even a stopped clock is right twice a day!”

    Okay, okay. I’ll give him a point for spelling “discreetly” right. And then give him minus eleventy for the rest of it.

    Adores: 11
  6. 2009 January 26

    I wept and threw up in my mouth when I saw this. And I’m not even the girl he’s writing to.

    Adores: 0
    • 2009 August 20
      Igor The Vigorous permalink

      I feel like I’m getting fat.
      My man-breasts are “helping” pretty tightly against my shirt.
      I’m scared that regardless of my location, he’ll find me and post an ad regarding me on Craigslist. -Shiver-

      Adores: 2
  7. 2009 January 26
    katg permalink

    Maybe it’s just that I have not finished my first cup of coffee yet, but the part that made me snort coffee out my nose was the random “help” in there (“the way ur shirt help tight against ur body”).
    Like a tiny little plea in all the chaos…

    (wonders off to finish coffee).

    Adores: 10
  8. 2009 January 28
    dogface permalink

    Oh man, I actually live near there and know exactly where they’re talking about! Creepy! If this dude is from Kentucky (assuming that they’re not in Ohio, but close), I’m pretty sure I know which college it is. Ew!

    Adores: 0
  9. 2009 August 28
    Amy permalink

    Class, for your next computer assignment I want you to write a personal ad. Please limit ad to one sentence.

    Adores: 5
  10. 2009 September 13
    J-Man permalink

    “It’s still a symphony of fail, with a suck encore.”

    I just found this site, and I love it! Plus, that phrase above described this situation perfectly. If I were in that class I would be terrified…and I’m a man!

    Also, this guy is in a “computer class,” and he types like that?!!

    Adores: 0
    • 2015 February 20
      Tankerbell permalink

      It’s still a symphony of fail, with a suck encore.

      DRMK, I heart you. Hard.

      Adores: 0
  11. 2012 May 26

    I hope the computer class covers Internet pr0n. That’s his only hope.

    Adores: 2
  12. 2012 May 26
    Limelolly permalink

    Love how the teacher’s joking is the most they have in common. “Remember that time when he told us about that time in that place?” “Can I lick you now?”

    Adores: 3
    • 2012 May 26
      One Moving Violation permalink

      How do you know he meant “joking”?

      Adores: 4
      • 2012 May 26
        Limelolly permalink

        Ewwww.

        Adores: 1
      • 2012 May 26

        Sweet Clothespin Jeebus, what school did you go to?

        Adores: 5
        • 2012 May 26
          One Moving Violation permalink

          You know, the one down that one alley.

          Adores: 4
  13. 2012 May 27

    kelli, don’t know why the box got sucked so far into the past. Hope you can find your way home! Punchity Punch Punch!

    Good Morning, Clowns to the left of me, Jokers to the right!

    Adores: 1
  14. 2012 May 28
    Gary permalink

    He must be concerned about her mental capacities:
    ” if u think u knwo who u r.

    Or maybe it’s a philosphy class.
    Can any of us ‘really’ know who we are?

    Adores: 2

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