YSaC, Vol. 751: It’s hard to swallow.
2010 August 7
Ceremonial Esophagus – $40
Ceremonial Esophagus – Solid Wood Construction and has black felt liner. Very solid construction with nice detail on outside and will make safe containment for storing valued or fragile items. – Unique $40.00
Assorted Fish and Butterfly Pendants (12 pcs) $24.00
C’mon, sing with me!
The ceremonial esophagus is connected to the … ritualistic trachea! The ritualistic trachea is connected to the … liturgical larynx! The liturgical larynx is connected to the … ecclesiastical epiglottis! …
Thanks, Christina!
*Ritualistic Trachea would be an awesome name for a band!
Finally, something to keep my Sacrificial Sacra-Ilium in!
Say, isn’t that the Linda Lovelace Ceremonial Esophagus model?
No, the Lovelace one comes with the Ceremonial Jeremy ….um nevermind….New York is warping my fragile brain.
Doesn’t really look deep enough to be a Linda Lovelace model.
Now there’s an item I can really sink my teeth into. And I’m not just paying it lip service. Really, it’s solid construction, tongue and groove, no doubt.
It looks good enough to eat.
It looks rather unpalateable to me.
Did someone say “sink” and “teeth”???
I knew it!
KittyShark has to swim in something
Oh, fright….
Wait, isn’t it Sharkitty, not Kitty Shark? Are you an IMPOSTOR???? … Do I sense the hand of Depressy at work here??!?!?
Or do I just have too much free time on my hands and/or I’m indulging in displacement activity again when I should be
excavatingcleaning my bedroom?Let us know if you find any Binderopteryx fossils.
Always remember, KittyShark rhymes with Cutty Sark *hic*
Cleaning bedroom?
*Hides under covers*
This is NOT a trap!
*Purrrrs and cleans my fins*
“Fins for swimming”?
ìCuiado! Esta no Llama aqui, el est tiburón del gato!
¡funcionamiento lejos! ¡funcionamiento lejos!
Oh goody! A ceremonial esophagus! This will be perfect for the (Sacrificial) Rites of Digestion Day in Chewandswallow.
According to yesterday’s comments by Lola, this is really just an esophagas that archeologists couldn’t classify.
This creeps me out a little. The “Ceremonial Esophagus” looks like it may once have contained someone’s cremains. Maybe Sparky is having trouble making money selling his assorted fish and butterfly pendants, looked at old Aunt Agnes still on the mantle and thought, “hey, if I dump out Agnes, I bet I could make money selling that fancy schmancy box on the CragsList(sic).”
My mind takes me to some very dark and twisted places.
Oh, I’m sure Sparky lovingly scattered Auntie’s ashes across the five burrows of New York with great pomp and circumstance………..
Well since you’re in NY, I could point you in the direction of a few dark and twisted places that I may or may not have frequented in my youth 😉
(East Village, that’s where to find the good dark and twisted)
There’s probably a shop or bar in the E Village called “Ceremonial Esophagus.”
I probably got drunk or bought a rubber skirt there once.
When I die, I want to be placed in an urn with a picture of a coffin on it.
That would be a pretty big urn… ‘zactly how tall are you?
Maybe several urns and have the pictures tell a story?
GRAHAM!!! 8) So glad to see you. Rumor has been going around that you and HHNF are locked in A ROOM and can’t get out! 8)
I thought the rumor was that it was actually a refurbished gas chamber and someone accidentally turned it on while they were in there?
Are we sure that’s really Graham or just one of those EMF shadows of Graham past, generated by the static here in the coments?
Somebody call Ghost
BustersHunters.Like that computer ghost thing in that episode of Dr. Who (with Ten) where they’re in the Library in the little girl’s mind or whatever?
I apologize if that sounds trippy* and nothing like any episode of Dr. Who**, but I only half-watched it while it was on TV as I simultaneously used the computer.
*The episode’s fault.
**My fault.
It’s GrahamT! We missed you! We also may or may not have done some purposeful line-crossing in your honor 🙂
Silence in the Library? Yeah, I’d do some checks to make sure Grahams not just a data ghost.
On an quasi-related topic, I am not able to give anyone doors–the +1 button is not even there. Plus, the ‘400 error’ page keeps kicking me off the entire website every time I post a comment. The comment will be posted, but I can’t get back on YSaC at all for about ten minutes. Is anyone else having problems?
Laurel – clear cache & history, restart. That usually does the trick.
That happens to me ALL THE TIME, Laurel. Definitely clear cache and history at least. What browser are you on? In Firefox, if you go into tools-options-privacy and click the “settings” button in “clear private data” and check all the boxes except the one that says “saved passwords”, tell it to clear private data whenever you close the browser, then close it and reopen it, that will certainly fix it. For some reason that’s what I always have to do in Flock (which is based on Firefox).
Edit: When you reopen the browser, go back to the same place and uncheck at least the cookies check box, otherwise it won’t remember that you were signed in to anything…if you want it to remember, that is.
“Silence in the Library”
band name FTW!
If for a tragically doomed to college-band obscurity and breaking up over artistic differences one gig before making it big (and one gig after the GF of who owns the PA has Had! Enough!)
Ceremonial Esophagus: one night only – Tonight! – at the 40 Watt.
With Special Guest, Silence in the Library.
Cover: $10, $8 with library card or mini anatomical digestive model.
Ceremonial Esophagus will be performing their original song “Fish Pins!“, and Silence in the Library will be performing covers of “Gee, Officer Krupke” and “I Feel Pretty“, from the musical “West Side Story“.
[L. Bernstein-J. Robbins corey]
Speaking of WSS, I just saw the B’way revival of that while I was on vacation. 50 years on it is still amazing – the choreography was original and the music is fantastic, and I was reminded of the fact that it was groundbreaking for its time. I’m not a giant fan of musicals, but that soundtrack is a Desert Island Disc, for sure. [/Bernstein-Robbins corey]
What, Astro, you don’t think that SitL would be more likely to play “Cool”?
I never actually heard Cool. When we watched the film in English class, that’s the only song we skipped over, if you don’t count the teacher’s distracting arm waving and shouting in a vain attempt to censor the f word at the end of Gee, Officer Krupke.
Also, I’m not sure that that really qualifies as a proper Corey.
“Cool” has some of the best jazz influence, IMO. As for the f-bomb … there isn’t one. It’s a euphemism based on Krupke.
… Seriously? They did that? :/
I find it very mildly funny that you use the supposedly gender-neutral “they” in relation to my English teacher, because she spent a whole day on why using it is wrong, because “they” is collective, and the proper gender-neutral pronoun is always “he”, although it is acceptable to use “he or she” if you do not wish to be sexist.
Actually, I was thinking more of “the school [administration]” collectively; they may appear to function monolithically but it’s all of those
littleminds separately that cause lame decisions such as that to be made and then carried out, by persons singular or plural.… Or, just maybe, that’s my small-town-originating bitterness showing. 8)
[personal corey]I had someone try to argue with me the other day that words’ meanings don’t change. Then, when given an example, he claimed that nouns’ meanings don’t change. I hit him with two MORE examples. He then proceeded to tell me that people had voted to define a word and I had to adapt to the will of the majority.
Bless his heart.
I told him to go ahead and try to pass language purity laws and see how well they actually work.
“He” might be the proper gender-neutral terms but oodles of people, by usage, have decided that “they” is more appropriate.
Always listen to your English teacher and then remember that most people don’t bother and will merrily abuse the language into whatever shape suits the community.[personal corey]
(I’m being oddly preachy today – apologies) :p
“I had someone try to argue with me the other day that words’ meanings don’t change.”
*facepalm*
Sure, Shakespeare. Whatever you say.
The classes that made me most nerdily excited when getting my degrees were the ones on the history and changes of the English language. Those are the texts I kept afterward. I would probably have had to be carried away after uncontrollably laughing myself incontinent and hysterically unconscious upon hearing that statement. You’re much more polite and self-controlled than I am.
[corey] L’académie Française is this “learned body” basically devoted to maintaining the purity of the French language. They actually DO get to vote on the proper usage and definitions of words. But even their rulings have no legal effect, and some are ignored if the general population has adopted a different usage. So, basically, if the language purity “laws” don’t even always work in a country that is very snooty about the purity of its language, such a thing will CERTAINLY not work here.
Oh, Moira, you could have also informed this man that as there is no de jure official language in the United States, only a de facto one, the power to select an official language was left to the states (and some have done so). So passing any sort of national “language purity laws” would be unconstitutional under the 10th amendment. 😉
As for “they”, I had to train myself out of using it as a singular pronoun when I went to law school. It remains unacceptable for use in legal writing. Hell, we can’t even use contractions in legal writing. [/corey]
LoL! In a CEC Biz Law class, heard a great aside on that–a contraction is perfectly valid language if you can find a a contract lawyer to perfectly define it first.
Now, as to the simpleton inflicted-on-Moira, said worthy probably is an exemplar of the level of forensic education in our nation today. All languages change; the meanings, usage, and even grammar change over time. Even in Latin, an allegedly “dead” language.
What IoM-spark probably meant was that words ought not have flexible meanings within a given context. East probably ought to be spinward planetary direction. Or that land mass collectively known as the “orient.” Unless a giddy, soon-to-suicide, italian teen nymphet name of Julie is about.
Unless comedic intent is meant (which would require a rather sophisticated audience, too).
“Is that the East?”
“No, this is Sicily. are you some sort of Capulet?”
“No, I’m trying to orient to the east.”
“Told’ya, dis issa Sicillia, capeche?”
“I came from an anti-spinward direction; is this east?”
“I don’t care what you spinster Aunt told’ya to do, this is still Sicily.
And why you insist in jabbering at me in Italian is giving me an itch–the name’s Monty, Montgomery Guey, from Brisbane!”
AHHHHH
*blissfully sinks back into a tub of warm, bubbly sanity*
(What does it say about my life that this place is a bastion of sanity?)
“Hey Doc, I’ve got this weird lump in my esophagus”
“Well, there’s your problem. You’ve been swallowing again haven’t you?”
*buh-bye line*
Too bad- I only have regular $40.00 comprised of two $20’s… nothing unique about my money.
(not that I’ve been around much lately, but I’ll be going to Maine and spending a few days there, no computer… so see you in a few posts)
No internet in Maine either? I just talked to a woman the other day who, when I asked if I could email some paperwork to her said, “I don’t got email, we don’t have internets in Connecticutt.”
Have fun in Stephen King’s playground, Silva!
I was on a Greyhound bus through Connecticut once, going to NYC. I saw a lot of trees. Maybe they really don’t have internets.
Be careful Bridgete, it could be spreading all over New England. Wasn’t Isaac supposed to be back? See, Vermont’s fallen as well.
[preemptive Mudslicker] Yes, South Park did this recently. [/preemptive Mudslicker]
I totally saw that episode.
If this keeps up and spreads beyond New England, then myself and the rest of the YSaC North Carolinians might be the last bastion of line-crossing amongst a sea of hope!
Astro, if we NYers go, gird yourself.
Astro: Had completely forgot you were a North Carolinian. We have just spent the last couple weeks of vacation on the East Coast, a week of it traveling south down the Outer Banks. My first visit here. What a beautiful state you have! We have enjoyed everyone and everything thoroughly. BBQ, hush puppies, sweet tea. (swoon) Triple figure heat and humidity. (swoon)
We head back to the West Coast on Tuesday. Will be a more regular commentator after that time. Missed you guys!!
Archy: Oh, there’s more. You’ve got to see the mountains in the fall. There’s also a lot of really great stuff in the Piedmont. And the zoo in Asheboro is one of the largest natural habitat zoos in the country, or something like that.
Also, if you’re still in NC, then if you end up on Wrightsville Beach, I highly recommend the Oceanic restaurant.
No, it’s more that I don’t own a laptop (yet) and don’t have an expensive phone (it makes calls and sends text messages and I call play Tetris on it, that’s all I need it to do), and won’t be lugging my PC with me on vacation.
I’ll take care to avoid the pet cemetery 😉
Uhm, it’s Saturday and all, which limits who is near law libraries, but is is legal to suggest, across state lines, that a minor gird themselves?
Well, I think it might be fine considering there was no mention of my loins.
**Goes off to find steel girders.**
Capn, my mind was nowhere near the gutter when I made that comment!*
*Not as regards Astro, anyway. Now, if you’ll excuse me, since you suggested that, I have to go de-squick myself.
[matt]What? We can’t have an honest line crossing? We have to go making a false association about girding (securing) based on the oft-used phrase which simply referred to protecting one’s vulnerable bits prior to battle because it uses a word that is used in other contexts?
I motion to strike Cap’s third-degree-stretch of an entendre on the grounds that he is smarter than that.[/matt]
😉
Shoot, I’ll second the motion, if it means not having to read out of the Thou Shallt Commit no Offense of Squick Meant To or Not for any Intent, even if you are the Spanish Inquisition, and we all know about how they are Expected . . . er, manual any more at all today.
(Which was under fun, very much Title I, §, 1, A, a), with tiresome inclusions and exclusions riddled through, i.e., LVII §101.1 applies in every case, except as B, or C. or G b), c), e) and f) apply )
Seemed simpler to assume all actions, innocent or not, were specifically excluded unless one could provide contravening authority to assert otherwise.
Snark, in so many words {G}
Archie!
*waves*
Enjoy our time zone. I agree – oh! The humidity!
[Vacation corey] Maine is nice this time of year. They have the “internets” up there, but unless you are near a larger city, it’s mostly dial up. Have a lobster for me. If you can find it, have the “Shore Lunch”. And make sure they bring you your dessert.
[/corey]
I live on a dirt road in the woods in Massachusetts, I’m stuck with dial-up already (for the time being, until I buy a laptop and can go sit in cafes with wifi). I’ve tried begging the various service providers, but none of them want to bring the wires down our street. So people only 2 streets away have modern connections, I’m stuck in the 90’s… le sigh.
[Again corey] And if you get near Brunswick, stop at
Seadog Brewery and have a Blueberry Wheat. [/corey]
Hmm, unless someone finds a better way, the one “unique” method of assembling forty dollars is:
Twenty dollar bill
Ten dollar bill
Five dollar bill
One dollar bill
Presidential dollar coin
SBA dollar coin
Eisenhower dollar coin
four quarters (differing issues)
I can’t find enough dime types in circulation that each would be unique.
Could one not use a Sacajawea coin or a Two Dollar Bill*?
*I actually have both of those items.
Yeah, I have three two’s (one is post-marked for 1st day of issue)–so I should have thought of that.
I chose the Presidential series over the Sacajawea as they are both “gold-coloured” and the same size; the other three are all different in size and appearance.
And, technically, the presidentials are supposed to be replacing the sac’s; come to think of it, one can argue that the Two is not a circulating bill, even if perfectly good tender, just like the Ike “silver dollar.”
Hmm, Jackson, Hamilton, Lincoln, Jefferson, Washington, then a gold-colored and a silver-colored dollar coin would work.
And, I have one of each of those (although that is about the limits of my entire liquidity)
The truly unique way would be…
Thirteen $3 bills and 13 pesos
Six $6 bills and 184 Indian Rupees
Four $9 bills and 28 Kronor
Sacajawea dollar coin?
Two dollar bill?
Or am I missing some nuance of your currency rules that would disqualify these but allow the Eisenhower?
Edit: Jinx with astro
“The ceremonial esophagus is connected to the … ritualistic trachea! The ritualistic trachea is connected to the … liturgical larynx! The liturgical larynx is connected to the … ecclesiastical epiglottis! …”
I don’t remember the last time I laughed so hard reading the comment[s] under the ads!
Thanks! It made my day already… 🙂
[Too much time outdoors corey] To me, this looks like a camp toilet, commonly known as a “Groover”. I will let you figure out why. [/corey]
I was thinking it looked like a portable bidet for miniature goths, or perhaps for a ren faire.
*brain briefly crosses “bidet” and “esophagus”; reverse perstalsis repressed successfully … for now*
My favorite is “Liturgical Larynx.”
The ecclesiastical epiglottis is connected to the…..operatic uvula…the operatic uvula is connected to the…madrigal palate…the madrigal palate is connected to the…sonorous sinuses!
My brain is still trying to alliterate (and not alimentate) pharynx into that mix.
[possible corey] Isn’t a SARCOphagus supposed to be bigger anyway? Like, the size of a person? [/corey]
[Egyptian corey} Although technically sarcophagi, “canopic” jars were used for internal organs removed from the deceased’s body before interment or entombment. These devices often resembled full-size sarcophagi. [/Egyptian corey]
Oh! Right, I knew that.
So basically…this thing is probably meant to hold an organ? Yum…
My Hammond aint gonna fit in there either.
Neither is my Farfisa. And you can just forget the Mellotron.
Maybe some mouth organs – a couple of Hohners might fit nicely.
O Ocarina!
(seemed the thing to say, and more apt than “Intercourse the penguin!”)
Mouth harp?
Pan-Flute?
Kazoo?
Speaking of kazoos …
When I was in first grade, we learned, and performed for the Christmas concert, “Silent Night” on kazoos.
Several decades later, my mother still claims that one has never really heard “Silent Night” until one has heard it performed on the kazoo by 25 first-graders.
I’m Pharaohly certain that I Akhenaten buy this, I really should bury it with my Djoser.
HamCan, you forgot to put your can on before leaving the house, how embarrassing!
At least he’s wearing sneakers.
Also, I’m officially scarred. Yesterday was Short Shorts day at Band Camp.
Some things cannot be unseen.
EDIT: HamCan, you’ll have to Ptolemy what you Menes by all that. 😀
I thought everyone would like some Chinese food today, instead of tinned meat.
(Moo Shoe Pork)
I’m laughing and groaning. That.was.bad!
Shorty-shorts day? I thought it wasn’t that kind of band camp!
It wasn’t all that bad except for the Mellophone (which Firefox doesn’t believe is a real word) Section Leader, because, during morning stretch block, the short shorts were all he was wearing.
But where’s my “moo”? It just looks like shoe pork to me!
Take a closer look at the shoes…
Ha! EB, your little avatar’s hair matches your new hair! That’s so cute.
Wait, doesn’t the Moo Shu come with those pancakes and the plumb duck sauce?
I don’t like the plumb duck sauce … such a heavy condiment.
Hmmm, maybe I was a tad illiteral*.
*New word for the day
But — it’s totally Can-shaped. Think of all the fun you could have with pretend wakes, and Halloween parties. HamCan the Vampire
Count Porkula?
It looks like that Esophagus let the butterflies out of it’s stomach.
<Isaac>So, what you’re saying is that this esophagus, it is a stomach?</Isaac>
[Matt minus Isaac]Not awl pairents culd a Ford 2 send there kids to collage or band cramp, sum of us had 2 took thangs in two R owen hands and tech R shelves ever thang. Sumtims we Miss Pell thangs or Miss Place pun chew nation marks N stuff[MATT minus Isaac]
So…Would you bury “Ceremonial Esophagus” pyrea-mid?
Hmm, I know I typed all the needed words for that to make sense, odd…
a
in a
I found these in the Snark Lounge Lost ‘n Found, did you drop them?
Also, if you wanted to cross the line with that one, you might have wanted these two that I found at the bottom of said Lost ‘n Found:
your
in her
It’s like Mad Libs!
the ornate
in the flaming
Oh, good. I always feels so outré using my everyday esophagus for weddings, first communions, and Wicker Man days.
I wonder if Sparky’s name is really Barrett…
I knew a woman who changed her name to Barrette. She said she just felt more like a Barrette than a Jennifer. I asked why she added the “te” to the end and she said it made the name more feminine. I told her it made it sound hairy to me. She punched my arm
I wonder if she had an esophagus too?
Sometimes* I guess I need to better explain my entendre
http://digestive.niddk.nih.gov/ddiseases/pubs/barretts/
*Most of the time, because I’m never obscure or anything. 🙂
well, maybe i wont have reflux with that one…
Reflux — bad.
Comment post — good.
(final thought)
Who needs that many gold and silver fish pins? Unless you have them swimming like a school all over your coat which I think would be pretty tacky.
I kinda like the fish pins 🙁
I kinda like saying fish pins.
Fish pins!
Fish pins!
Fish pins!
Sish fins!
Finsh pinsh!
*hic*
Oh thank god. I needed something to bury my dead food in.
Isn’t dead generally the preferred state for food to be in?
As opposed to either live or West Virginia?
Unless, of course, said food is a certain mystical Tex-Mex entree, or a can of pork product.
Well, in far Nippon, there are some specialty places that serve live, and semi-live seafood to people. Not that I could tell what made “dancing shrimp” so much better than the ordinary kind (and for 20,000¥ cheaper).
Fresher is better!
We prove that everyday, here.
This is NOT a trap…
The kitty portion of Sharkitten looks eerily like my Fearless, especially at feeding time.
Fish pins, fish pins, shiny pretty fish pins
Fish pins, fish pins, pin them on, yay!
In the morning, ceremonial organs,
In the evening, butterfly pins, too!
Fish pins, fish pins, shiny pretty fish pins
Fish pins, fish pins, pin them on, yay!
Once took one to CraigsList
Found it safe containment in a wood esophagus.
[chorus]
Fish pins are never seen around kittyshark avatars crossing lines or having slices of coffee or sips from Lola’s flask.
Yeah!
[more chorus]
etc.
I started a thread in the forums to collect the songs, please add this, it’s too much fun not to share!
Added.
A door for you! Even though it’s still not working =(
That is one of my all-time favourite songs–I like to get the whole bus singing on band trips. I’m pretty sure I’m a bus driver’s worst nightmare.
On band trips we always sing our show and Don’t Stop Believing.
I know that Moira’s song sounds familiar, but I can’t remember exactly what song it is…
“Fish heads, fish heads, roly-poly fish heads” is what I’m favoring for source material.
Indeed, Lola.
That gem from Barnes & Barnes. I can imagine Lennier as Will Robinson but, somehow, I can’t imagine him singing “Fish Heads.” Really, it would have been awesome if JMS had put a scene in the show (perhaps when he was putting the motorcycle together) when Lennier encountered, and was puzzled by, a Barnes & Barnes song.
Got to share this with you YSaCers because you will best understand it. While driving around town today runnng errands, my honey and I were trying to come up with a good word for stupid drivers. Mike said: “Stupendular. When the stupid just hangs off of them.”
Today’s word; Stupendular!
That’s a much nicer word than I call them!
That reminds me of the traffic jams going out of the fireworks show at the State Fairgrounds on the 4th of July. On one of those occasions, my sister and I learned a shiny new word from our dad. It started with an F.
Fudge? Frackistack? Fudd? Fark? 8) Your dad sounds fun, bless his heart!
What, you’d never heard “firetruck” before? I’m surprised, what with them being loud and shiny and all.
Our school’s band director told the classes that if they uttered a word in his classes that began with F and ended with K then it had better be “firetruck.”
Adopted form morning talk radio guys: Bozon. From conjoining bozo and moron so as to not offend either named group. And for being as inexplicable as the similarly-named particle named for Dr Higg.
And hooray for Mindfield! I’ve heard that dogs lose the ability to suck after they get their teeth in. 8)
Hmm… I think I have a use for this coffin shaped container and yes, even the butterflies.
*makes shopping list: shovel, flashlight, black velvet, rhinestones, and Bonnie Rait or Alannah Myles*
Hey everyone, the King is coming to my house!
The King of Nigeria?
‘Cause I hear he wants to give you money or something.
I hope so, as this will be an expensive roadtrip… or I’ll need bail money. Probably the latter…
I spent entirely too much time gaming on Facebook yesterday, and neglected my YSaC duties! I’ll put myself in the corner in just a few mintues, but first!
Mindfield, Punchity Punch Punch!
G’Night, New England!
But how does it connect to the Grave Bowel??????
http://www.yousuckatcraigslist.com/?p=4648
hey, a really fancy wooden toilet seat has been converted into an even fancier wooden casket for my pet reptiles. I could really use that. If I had (dead) pet reptiles, that is. But whatever, it’s fancy and wooden and everything, so.. err… whatever.