YSaC, Vol. 765: I want a facial from Schlegel!

2010 August 21

Esthetician needed at Farmacy


Two years experiance a must. Must have some cliental. Rent or commision available. Farmacy is a beautiful spa in [Location] with a solid reputation for the last ten years. We are a down to earth friendly spa where gossip is strongly fround apone. Must be an out going, REASPONSIBLE person that realy wants to make Esthetics a career. Please call Ile @ ###-###-#### and make an appointment to drop off your resume.

Now, in defense of this poster, they have not, in fact, misspelled "Pharmacy" - the spa at which they work is actually called "Farmacy." Of course, that raises the question of why you would give your day spa a name that sounds like you're filling Lipitor requests for Holsteins. (One guess what THAT's going to trigger in the Google Ads box.)

On the other hand, it's entirely possible that Ile is the owner of "Farmacy," and actually misspelled the store in the first place when she opened it. After all, she HAS managed to misspell "experience," "commission," " clientele," " frowned," and even "upon."

But that's not even the best part of the ad. No, it's the fact that she's trying to hire an aesthetician. I considered that as a career, but figured there just weren't many jobs available any more. Shows what I know. I'll bet the aestheticians are just lining up out the door for this job.

In fact, now I want to go to this spa.  Can you imagine getting your nails done while discoursing on the philosophical nature of the beautiful?  Who wouldn't want that?

150 Responses leave one →
  1. 2010 August 21
    Sheriff Lurkin permalink

    Isn't Farmacy one of those Facebook games?

    And why am I up early enough to snark before anyone beats me to it?

    Adores: 14
    • 2010 August 21
      LimeLolly permalink

      Early to bed, early to rise,
      Makes one's snark ready before the other guy's.

      Adores: 21
      • 2010 August 21

        Green skies at night, snarkist's delight;
        Black skies at dawn, snarkist's be warned.

        Adores: 10
        • 2010 August 21
          TSA permalink

          Some of us simply weren't born to snark. The best I could come up with was "manicures by Kant".

          Adores: 4
    • 2010 August 21
      Windrose permalink

      Howdy, Sherrif! If you friend me on FB, we can play Farmacy as neighbors! I'll steal a pig from you, you can innoculate the cows, and it will be huge fun! (You know, it does kinda sound like it would be a fun game. 8) )

      Adores: 8
      • 2010 August 21
        Sheriff Lurkin permalink

        I'm not sure I want to be involved in the artificial inoculation of cows.

        Adores: 4
        • 2010 August 21
          Grampdaddy permalink

          Ah, but the question is: (Clint Eastwood voice) "Are ya man enough to do it? Huh, are ya punk? - Go ahead, make my day" (Mooooooooo...)

          (This comment is not intended to make any suggestions about the Sheriff's proclivities concerning cows. Any resemblance to actual persons is purely coincidental. This is a work of fiction. And besides, the cow decided not to press charges.)

          Adores: 12
        • 2010 August 21
          Windrose permalink

          Who said it would be artificially? Zing! There goes that pesky line again.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 August 21
          LimeLolly permalink

          Golly Windrose... you're usually the one holding the line in place.

          I hope you plan on sharing whatever you've been imbibing. :)

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 August 22
          Windrose permalink

          Iced Tea? Decafe, at that. LimeLolly, I have a confession to make. I only look innocent. *flutters eyelashes demurely*

          Adores: 4
    • 2010 August 21

      I was up, but getting ready for brunch with my mom and my friends.

      Adores: 1
  2. 2010 August 21
    MandaB permalink

    I have not enough coffee for to make philosophical discourse.

    However, I keep reading that they want a REASPONSIBLE person and I'm wondering if that is someone who is both reasonable and responsible? I would prefer the person doing my nails, brows, etc. to be highly irrational and of questionable judgement. It would make every trip to the spa feel like I was living on the edge.

    Adores: 14
  3. 2010 August 21
    ArchedEyebrows permalink

    If her clients fround when they hear gossip, don't they defeat the purpose of a spa?

    Adores: 5
    • 2010 August 21

      I think the gossip she's referring to is more like:
      "Hey Tiffany, wanna go have a day of beauty? I hear there's a new esthetician at Farmacy."
      "No way, Brittney, Brooke got a facial there last week and the doctor says she might be able to take the bandages off by November."
      "Isn't that the place Liz went to for her prom hair style? She told me the girl cut her hair with a Flobee."

      Adores: 6
      • 2010 August 21
        Windrose permalink

        I thought it was more like, "Tiphani, guess which favorite got the big tipper again? Miss Ile doesn't like us facial estheticians." "I know, Britnee, right? She must think our real mud facials should be fround apone."

        Adores: 5
        • 2010 August 21

          I totally read facial as racial, and I've already had three coffee slices today.

          Adores: 3
  4. 2010 August 21

    "Fround apone"
    Aside from making me giggle because I'm imagining the grandmother from the Beverly Hillbillies running a day spa, there is a slight irony in that this phonetic combination isn't the least bit (a)esthetic to look at or enunciate.
    I won't snark on "Farmacy" because it's a far cry less offensive than most salon names I've seen recently that feel the need to use K instead of C. Kuttin' Up, Kountry Kuts, Kuts N' Kurls...too many to list.

    Adores: 7
    • 2010 August 21

      I really like "fround apone." I nominate it as band name of the day, if we're still doing that.

      All the way from Vancouver, by way of Portland! Put you hands together for the syntho-grunge sound your parents wouldn't approve of! I give you ... FROUND APONE!!

      Adores: 16
      • 2010 August 21

        The more I look at it, the more I see a 5 year old at a petting zoo.
        "Mom, MOM! Look! I fround apone!"

        Adores: 9
        • 2010 August 21
          Kae permalink

          I assure you, my soon-to-be 5-year-old has a FAR better vocabulary than that!

          Adores: 5
      • 2010 August 21

        Fround Apone's musical selection for the evening will include:

        REASPONSIBLE cliental

        and

        Aesthetically Painful

        Adores: 9
      • 2010 August 21
        CapnMac permalink

        Well, mix of Doug Adams and Aliens (since Gig Weaver was invoked the other day) makes me want to render
        "Fround Apone"
        As "FROON d AY pOWN"

        So, maybe, just maybe, the desired hire would be a reasaonable and responsible frood of a Space Marine--HooRAH!

        That, and military service can give a person an existentionalist bent.

        Adores: 1
    • 2010 August 21
      Grampdaddy permalink

      I believe that "fround apone" is actually an old southern expression for a food delicacy. "Fround" is the past-tense of "fried", and "apone" is made from grits. Therefore, "fround apone" is a multiply-fried, greasy, cold, somewhat slimy food item probably found only in Indiana and Kentucky currently.

      Perhaps 'Farmacy' is plying the clients with fresh delicacies.

      Adores: 8
      • 2010 August 21
        Lola permalink

        Fround apone and bacontinis for everyone! Everyone who doesn't mind taking a few months off of the back end of their life, that is.

        Adores: 2
        • 2010 August 21
          I_Love_Lola permalink

          I wouldn't mind taking a few years off my life, as long as that life was shared with YOU.

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 August 21

          Wow! Lola has a stalker now?

          What else have I missed?

          Adores: 1
      • 2010 August 21
        Meredith permalink

        I also thought it sounded like food. Something rich and comforting. Gramps description is not what I was picturing.

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 August 21

          I did think corn pone when I first read it, but corn pone does not comfort me, especially now that I know most here in Texas is made with bacon fat.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 August 21
          CapnMac permalink

          Well, only the pest bone uses bacon drippings. {G}
          Too many of the polentas use shortening instead of a smaller amount of lard.

          Not that shortening can't be used, it's quite handy to mix in when you grind just-gone-stale corn tortillas into a sort of tamale filling. Which will fry in a pan nicely, or steam in a husk equally well. Drizzle of bacon drippings adds a hint of both salt and pepper to the mix.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 August 21

          Pest Bone? What is going on in your galley, Cap'n?

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 August 21

          Cap'n's got a little too much Cap'n in 'im. Like a whole flaskful or somethin'.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 August 21
          CapnMac permalink

          Or, stinkin' IE spellcheck finds "pest" spelt correctly even though "best" was intended.

          *grumble,grumble,grumble,grumble,grumble*

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 August 21
          Grampdaddy permalink

          Sorry Meredith, I've now lived in Indiana too long - I've seen what is considered food here.

          Adores: 0
      • 2010 August 21
        Jinx permalink

        Although real fried grits are yummy!

        LOL, I call places where one can buy medical marijuana, "farmacies".

        Fround apone was found alone
        getting a sea salt facial.

        She said "I don't gossip
        About who is knocked up,
        Or dance shows on basic cable."

        Adores: 7
      • 2010 August 22
        queensbee permalink

        yeah - i had a corn apone a while back in a country-style restaurant. yeah. that was it.

        Adores: 0
  5. 2010 August 21
    Sheriff Lurkin permalink

    Hey! Maybe they rent pigs!

    I want one with all the hair waxed off of it, though.
    Don't want no furry bacontini.

    Adores: 8
    • 2010 August 21
      Grampdaddy permalink

      And it would be all prettied up to walk around at the pig roast.

      Adores: 8
  6. 2010 August 21

    This just made me think of a place in my old 'hood called "Féline Day Spa." Apparently, the owner called it that because she thought cats were super classy, but they don't actually provide any services for cats. :( Still, whenever my cat decides to lick my face, it occurs to me that he's quite good at microdermabrasion. And he doesn't gossip, so maybe I should send him out to earn his keep.

    Adores: 21
    • 2010 August 21
      Litarider permalink

      Now that they have fish for pedicures, cat facials can't be far behind.

      Adores: 10
      • 2010 August 21

        As much of a fan of organic treatments as I am, this trend squicks me.

        Adores: 1
      • 2010 August 22
        ratwoman permalink

        At last, a use for pet rats! My girls will happily clean faces and ears, groom hair, give manicures and pedicures, and trim beards, And clean your teeth, if you're feeling brave. I should be making money out of them!

        Adores: 2
    • 2010 August 21
      LimeLolly permalink

      Good idea, and you can tip with tuna --- after the facial, of course.

      Adores: 6
      • 2010 August 21
        Litarider permalink

        Plus cats can walk on your back and knead your muscles. Whether they deign to do so is the client's problem. That's what happens when you're an early adopter.

        Adores: 8
        • 2010 August 21
          SilvaNoir permalink

          Massage and Acupuncture all in one (thanks to kitty claws). "Meow" "Ow" Meow" "Ow"

          Adores: 11
        • 2010 August 21
          Lola permalink

          I get feline massage and acupuncture for free all of the time. Problem is, it's only at the whim of the masseur/acupuncturist and rarely where I would actually want it to occur. I guess I get what I pay for.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 August 21

          Severus loves kneading. I've tried to get him to knead my back a couple times, but to no avail. I can't get acupuncture from him, I trim his claws so that he can knead and I don't get stabbed every time.

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 August 21
          Lola permalink

          Bridgete, you have better luck than I. Attempts to trim my cat's claws results in deployment of the claws. I put up with the acupuncture since its better than intentional scratching.

          And mine, as I was just telling a friend, also loves to knead. It might well qualify as a hobby. He has a stance and everything, like it's Olympic-level. When it's fleece-throw weather, he will knead fleece for ages.

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 August 21

          Since my cat weighs about 20 punds, he's just the perfect size for giving an effective massage.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 August 21
          sarajean80 permalink

          Fearless goes into this weird trance when she starts the knead, her eyes close just a little bit and she looks slightly stoned. If you don't physically push her down she will knead forever in the same spot, leaving a little rash-like place from the claw prickles.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 August 22
          Moira permalink

          I made the mistake of teaching my cat to walk on my back. I say "mistake" because she isn't heavy enough to provide much pressure, she doesn't knead, and now she seems to feel it is imperative to sleep on my torso when I am in bed.

          Ah well. She's still a cute little fuzzball (advancing age notwithstanding).

          Adores: 2
    • 2010 August 21
      MandaB permalink

      Having noted the places my cats lick while in the process of grooming themselves, I will pass on the kitty facial.

      Adores: 7
      • 2010 August 23

        My cat is too fat to reach any of those places.

        Adores: 2
  7. 2010 August 21
    LimeLolly permalink

    How amusing it is to have to 'make an appointment' to drop off a resume at a salon.

    Wonder if one is expected to tip the person who receives the resumes?

    Adores: 10
    • 2010 August 21

      Yes, but if it's a calasay place, the applicant may be offered a glass of wine while they wait.

      Adores: 2
    • 2010 August 21
      ToBScholarly permalink

      I am guessing that the closer your resume looks to the LOLCATS spelling, the better your chances of getting hired.

      I can haz purty job pleez?

      Adores: 14
  8. 2010 August 21

    The last thing I want to do is to raise Dan's hackles, but isn't "aesthetician" an acceptable (if perhaps pretentious) synonym for "beautician"? I mean, I like a good Schlegel joke as much as the next guy, but I think that's what some spa people really call that job that involves doing skin care for others.

    Adores: 7
    • 2010 August 21
      Dan permalink

      Do ostrimus have hackles? What ARE hackles, anyway?

      And in my defense, I had no idea there was such a thing as an "esthetician." I thought it was a horrible misspelling of something. My excuse? I'm a guy.

      Adores: 8
      • 2010 August 21
        Mr. Winkey, the Six Dollar Shirts Hobo permalink

        **winks at Dan and his hackles**

        I believe hackles are something related to the rump.

        Teehee.

        Adores: 5
      • 2010 August 21

        Ostrimus only have hackles if they've smoked 3 packs a day for 30 years.

        Adores: 7
      • 2010 August 21
        Grampdaddy permalink

        Dan, I don't believe that "I'm a guy" constitutes an excuse. According to my charming partner of 42 years (including dating and marriage) being a "guy" involves a state of mindlessness and frequently receiving a look that say, " What is the matter with you??"

        It must be true, she said so...

        Adores: 1
      • 2010 August 21

        [Feather corey] The hackles are the soft feathers usually found under the stiffer flight feathers. They are mainly used as insulation. [/corey]

        Adores: 2
        • 2010 August 21

          Oh, and tying a Royal Coachman.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 August 21

          I would have said "Wooly Bugger", but knowing this crowd...

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 August 21
          CapnMac permalink

          Which is a fishing lure known as a "fly" for the non-anglers.

          A "fly" in this context is a fish hook combined with some high-preiced craft items, an impressionist view of emtomology, and steady hands (and often, a magnifying glass). A fine and exquisite esthetic, which like many human edeavors runs from sublime to ridiculous to OCD.

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 August 21

          That sounds like a pretty fly for a white guy.

          Adores: 10
        • 2010 August 21

          Well done, sir.

          Adores: 0
    • 2010 August 21

      [Beauty Industry Corey] Estethician is the professional term for a skin care/make up specialist. They do require a state cosmotology license, which this person does not ask for. [/B I Corey]

      Adores: 6
      • 2010 August 21
        LimeLolly permalink

        In Germany, you apparently can get a Doctor of Science degree in Cosmetology. Huzzah for being an Esthetician!

        Adores: 3
    • 2010 August 21

      {beautician Corey}Actually Isaac a beautician must be able to do hair and nails to pass their state board and gat licensed. An aesthetician is a while other class course and license. I know this cuz oldest daughter is a beautician though she prefers the term hairstylist-whatev-and cannot do the same services as the aesthetician working in the same salon{/end beautician Corey}

      oh and welcome back!

      Adores: 4
      • 2010 August 21

        Beauticians are over 50, stylist are under 50 and cosmotologists are still in school. At least that's how my customers tend to refer to themselves.
        [stylist symapthy corey]Honestly, though, it's a hard deal. You pay about as much as a four year state university degree for a year of school that, 9 times out of 10 is going to get a minimum wage plus tips job at a franchise salon. Most booth renters barely make that. [/sympathy corey]

        Adores: 2
        • 2010 August 21

          I thought a cosmotologist was a bartender.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 August 21
          CapnMac permalink

          Wouldn't that be a "cosmomixologist"?

          Adores: 2
    • 2010 August 21
      Windrose permalink

      "I like a good Schlegel joke as much as the next guy" unless the next guy is TacoGasmicSexyFingers and then he likes those sort of joke more than anyone!

      Good morning, all, here's a fresh pot of coffee slices!

      Adores: 4
  9. 2010 August 21
    Litarider permalink

    Farmacy is a beautiful spa in [Location] with a solid reputation for realy bad speeling the last ten years. Peeeples what speel good knead knot appply.

    Adores: 11
    • 2010 August 21
      CapnMac permalink

      Peeeples woat speel good kneed knot appply.

      FiFY

      Adores: 1
  10. 2010 August 21
    Bianchi Sound permalink

    "I sure hope we find a new Esthetician soon."

    "I know, Ide. Some of our esthetical wiring is a real mess."

    Adores: 7
  11. 2010 August 21

    Farmacy, When Old MacDonald has a plausible argument using false or invalid inference.

    Adores: 9
    • 2010 August 21
      Windrose permalink

      HamCan, you surprise me! You sound all educated and stuff!

      Adores: 3
      • 2010 August 21

        Don't worry, Windrose, I'll lower the bar:
        Farmicide is what happens when Mrs. MacDonald finds out that, on his farm Old MacDonald had some milk maids, ee eye ee eye oh, oh, OH YES!

        Adores: 7
  12. 2010 August 21
    Camille permalink

    Threadjack from Austria:

    Today I was standing in the ticket line at the Vienna Zoo, minding my own business, while the two little Austrian boys behind me played with a stuffed toy not-a-lion. (I assume they were Austrian- the adults with them were speaking German to each other.) One of the little boys said to the other, in English, "That's not a tiger, it's a lion."

    Either this site has some very small Austrian fans (in which case, Guten Tag, kinder!) or the large-cat confusion is spreading worldwide.

    Adores: 9
    • 2010 August 21
      Laurelhach permalink

      It's a pandemic now! D=

      Wash your hands and move to the countryside before you and your children start calling tigers lions too! Oh, the huge manatee...

      Adores: 7
    • 2010 August 21
      CapnMac permalink

      Well, while in the grocery store yesterday, I was on the frozen food aisle, where a line of frozen entrèes were on sale.

      Sparqie: "Hey, look! these are on SALE! 4 for $10"
      Sparkie: "Hey, that's only Two Dollars Each! We should get some!"

      I hate it when the bulk of the students return to town--about 30,000 people willing an able to demostrate the entire range of "humanity is doomed" skills.

      Adores: 5
  13. 2010 August 21

    Help! I read the ad, and now they're stuck! I need a experianced, reasponsible esthetician to fix them.*

    *I'll also need a career optomologest with cliental to uncross my eyes, but let's work on one thing at a time, shall we?

    Adores: 7
    • 2010 August 21
      Lola permalink

      I can't help you directly with your problems, Ar ... Ms. Brow, but while you wait for your referrals ... here's my flask.

      Adores: 1
    • 2010 August 21

      I can help, I've got some pliers and duct tape! I keep my pliers in a jar of barbacide so you know they're sterile. I've also got some tin snips in there, want a hair cut while I'm at it?

      Adores: 0
    • 2010 August 21

      I'll take the flask, thank you Lola, but will pass on the tool box fixes. Not that your over enthusiastic kind offer to help isn't appreciated, christina, but I like my long tresses just the way they are. And, as you can see, the brows are back to their upward stance...just looked at some pictures of my granddaughter and they smoothed right out!

      Adores: 0
  14. 2010 August 21

    [Safety corey] One of the places I work at is out in the boonies, and doesn't have a normal fire alarm system. If you pull the alarm, it sounds inside the building but nowhere else. As a result, they had to post a notice at every pull station that says "Alarm is not connected. Call 911 if you want the Fire Department to responed." The day after the signs went up, several of us went to the Head Cheese (Yes, the icky one.) and pointed it out. We were told that it didn't matter, because everyone understood the message. [Entrenched stupid corey.]

    Adores: 0
    • 2010 August 21

      I have a couple more if anyone wants to hear them.

      Adores: 0
      • 2010 August 21
        Lola permalink

        You don't need permission to go OT here! Share away, Smedley. Borrow the "humanity is doomed" tag if need be.

        Adores: 0
    • 2010 August 21
      Lola permalink

      I hope that if you have a cell phone that 911 is a preset dial for you, just in case.

      Adores: 0
      • 2010 August 21
        CapnMac permalink

        [secondhand first responder corey]
        There is an undercurrent in the Emergent Services trade that has been inveigling against such presets. The presumption being that if the preset is removed there might be a decreased amout ot drunk/intoxicated dialing of 911.

        Local County ESM is running a psa with a recording of some lout who dialed 911 and spent about 5 minutes confused as to why they were not the pizza joint said lout normally calls.

        The counter argument (see, even OT, some on-topic content {G}) being that the percentage of the population that prefers being insensate will still manage to tie up vital services through their deliberate incompetency.

        Which made the video on That Will Buff Out today, of a person so high they were driving the wrong way on a Utah highway near SLC, until they plowed into a UHP car even more poignant.

        [/corey]

        Adores: 0
  15. 2010 August 21

    Just remember, you asked for it. [Electrical discharge corey] The main place I work has a fuel farm and a gas station. If the local airfield registers more than a set number of lightning strikes per minute, they call the fuel farm and the gas station to warn them. Both places have big metal signs they trundle out if that happens. "Temporarily closed due to lightening"
    [/Sun In? corey]

    Adores: 3
    • 2010 August 21

      And my personal favorite [Sheer laziness corey] The gas station has an entrance on the main drag that had a "No Left Turn" sign on it, because too many people were turning into oncoming traffic and getting hit. There was also a "No Left Turn" sign on the way out, so you wouldn't get hit by crossing traffic. Anyway, there was a big push at the start of the year to make people aware that those signs were there. Morning, noon, and night, there was always someone pulled over there, and the cops were doing brisk ticket business. At the end of the push, the solution to the problem was to remove the signs. [/*Sigh* corey.]

      Adores: 1
    • 2010 August 21

      That's totally not off topic since Sun In is a beauty* product.

      *If your idea of beauty is irregular orange streaks through naturally dark brown hair. Ah, eighth grade memories.

      Adores: 3
      • 2010 August 21

        You just had streaks? You got off lucky. My entire head of irregular hair turned orange. At the time, there were rules against shaving your head, and I was told I had to let it grow out. Six months later, I finally cut the rest off. Nothing like spending half a year as a reverse skunk.

        Adores: 0
        • 2010 August 21

          I ended up getting some high lift bleach and making my whole head banana yellow. By that point my hair had the texture of cotton candy and I looked like a negative image of Robert Smith of The Cure.

          Adores: 2
      • 2010 August 21
        Lola permalink

        My junior year of high school, a large amount of the sophomore class apparently fell into a large vat of Sun-In and almost all (it was a small school) came to the beginning of the school year with various orange streaks, guys included.
        School photos were taken a few weeks later, thereby preserving this phenomenon for posterity. Something tells me that many, many of those photos are hidden from spouses and children today.

        Ah, the '80s.

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 August 21
          sarajean80 permalink

          In the late '80s I got one of those horrible poodle perms (because my sister had one) and it looked (surprise, surprise) horrible. The chemicals fried my hair and turned it a really odd brassy color. It was like a frizzy metallic-blond helmet that, coupled with the enormous eyeglasses that took up half my face, made me look a bit like a space alien. I think I threw out that particular yearbook.

          One good note, I had semi-wavy hair before the perm but afterwards it got realy curly, like corkscrew curly, and has never gone back to wavy. It was truly permanent, just not the chemically fried and frizzed part.

          Adores: 0
    • 2010 August 21
      Jinx permalink

      METAL signs that they put out when there's lightening? I guess the approaching sunrise doesn't frighten them. Or the potential for grounding. So low man on the totem pole gets to put out the signs?

      If you feel your hair standing on end, you might want to move. That usually means lightning is about to strike....

      Adores: 1
  16. 2010 August 21
    Meredith permalink

    Now I have to change my Gravatar to reflect my thoughts on the pro they will end up hiring for this position.

    Adores: 5
    • 2010 August 21

      You do look purdy, Meredith!

      Adores: 0
    • 2010 August 21

      Pretty and witty and bright.

      Adores: 1
  17. 2010 August 21

    Off to Paris later today, so I will be much too busy shopping and sightseeing to stop by for snark. À bientôt, mes amis! :)

    Adores: 2
    • 2010 August 21
      kelli permalink

      Au revior, Bridgete!

      Adores: 0
    • 2010 August 21
      Meredith permalink

      Wow, nice. Enjoy!

      Adores: 0
    • 2010 August 21
      Lola permalink

      Fall in love by the Seine for us. :)

      Adores: 0
      • 2010 August 21

        Alternately, you could just fall into the Seine.

        And then someone could fish you out with a seine.

        And you could fall in love with your seine-fisherman.

        And you could both fall into the seine together. Or the Seine. Or both.

        Adores: 10
        • 2010 August 21
          CapnMac permalink

          Was going to object, that no true Parisian would stop their contemplation of Void and Nothingness, to deign to notice any thing so bourgeois as someone drowning (and, forfend, risk getting their Galloise wet). Unless a Webb's Wonder cabbage were at hand.

          But, I remembered that it is August, meaning the only French in the capitol will be Acadians or Canadians--and those folk would be helpful to fellow tourists.

          Wonder if a purse-style tuna nets would be a cache-seine {G}

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 August 21

          [Isaac]But why would anyone be drowning in the capitol? I did not know that France's version of a capitol contained water. Now, I do realize that Paris, the capital, has water within its borders, but I don't see why the French Capitol would, except for perhaps fountains, which are hardly deep enough to drown in as a whole.[/Isaac]

          Just demonstrating for Isaac what we were reduced to when he was away.

          Adores: 4
    • 2010 August 21
      Windrose permalink

      Can't wait for the verbal post cards when you return! Best and happiest wishes for your sojourn. Hope Severus gets over his pout enough to bid you bon voyage!

      Adores: 0
  18. 2010 August 21
    kelli permalink

    I desperately want to believe that this is a case of English as a second language learner. Also, how do you pronounce Ile? Is it like "ill" or "isle" or something completely different?

    Adores: 0
    • 2010 August 21
      Lola permalink

      Eye-lee?

      Adores: 2
      • 2010 August 21

        My guess is "Elly".

        Adores: 0
    • 2010 August 21

      Illy? (You know, like the way this person spells?)

      Or is that spelled illly?

      Adores: 2
      • 2010 August 21
        CapnMac permalink

        Probably, since it has a vaguely "french" look to it, it is "EEL"
        In the same way that "Guy" is "GHEE."

        Adores: 0
    • 2010 August 21
      Lou Stool permalink

      EE-leh?

      Adores: 0
  19. 2010 August 21

    I once applied at a farmacy.
    As such to drop off my resume.
    REA.SPON.SI.BLE person.
    And that it is certain.
    I fround apone esthetican wannabe.

    Adores: 1
  20. 2010 August 21
    CapnMac permalink

    Oh, and once again, I cannot snark on FF without being clobbered with a 400 Bad Request error.

    Which forces me to use this wretched IE.

    Which gives me an itch, it is so annoying. And also slow.
    Grrr, grrr, not wanting to spend Saturday "under the hood" of any computers.

    All I had planned for the day was to make guac and a fondito to enjoy while watching Bristol under the lights.

    At least we still know that Schegle was "very rarely stable" {G}

    Adores: 1
    • 2010 August 21

      Dude, you gotta clear your cache or something. I was getting that problem wance apon atihm.

      Main thing: clear all cookies from yousuckatcraigslist.com, then restart browser. Give it a try.

      Adores: 1
  21. 2010 August 21

    Off Topic weirdness: YSaC has been governing the events of my life this week. First it was the humming bird post. All of the sudden I'm seeing hummingbirds in my yard and hummingbirds have never hung out at my place before. Last night I get into a hipster hobo cat fight and today I had a visit from the Mormons. I did not bring up underwear, I promise.
    So, um, nobody talk about car wrecks or illness or bad acne and the like, okay?

    Adores: 2
    • 2010 August 21
      Lou Stool permalink

      How about the flying monkeys from "The Wizard of Oz"? That should be good for a laugh, my pretty.

      Adores: 2
      • 2010 August 21

        Flying monkeys are covered. My husband and I refer to each other as monkeys and I have flown light body aircraft, so that makes me a flying monkey.

        Adores: 0
    • 2010 August 21
      Windrose permalink

      Or being sued for silly reasons, or tax audits, or beer can explosions! *shudder*

      Adores: 0
    • 2010 August 21
      Lola permalink

      Hipster hobo cat fight? Mr Winkey came by and was kicking your cat? Jerk!

      Adores: 0
      • 2010 August 21
        CapnMac permalink

        That, or a bearded female hipster was offering up battery to our dear Christina.

        Adores: 0
        • 2010 August 21

          Sorry, I stand accused of yellow journalism. There wasn't a real fight, just a hobo hipster trying to impress his hobo hipster girlfriend by loudly pointing out my "hipster Etsy crap" and how "retarded" it was. He was referring to my handmade coffee cup sleeve that I made because I have an irrational fear of touching cardboard. Seeing as I am old enough to be his mother, my only defensive action was to smile sweetly at the both of them and "toasted" them with my offending latte as I left the shop.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 August 22
          Lola permalink

          Classy response, Christina! I like it.

          Adores: 0
  22. 2010 August 21
    Lou Stool permalink

    "solid reputation for the last ten years" (the 30 years previous, however are a different story).

    Adores: 8
    • 2010 August 21
      LimeLolly permalink

      That would be the reason that gossip is not allowed. Because the shampoo girl has a big mouth.

      Adores: 5
  23. 2010 August 22
    Windrose permalink

    Weekend Wrap-up!

    Round-up, Re-Cap, 08/21/10

    Yes, indeed, the day started out with esthetics and philosophy, and degenerated into fround apone pretty quickly. Sheriff Lurkin investigated a farm game, LimeLolly and Asrtognash chimed in with rhymin’. TSA lamented that sometimes one Kant snark, and Windrose had a proposition for the good sheriff. He wasn’t interested. LimeLolly thought Windy should have held the line.

    Grampdaddy called the sheriff a punk, and apologized to bovines everywhere. Bridgete was out to brunch. MandaB wanted a salon on the edge, while Archie, Christina, and Windrose debated who would be gossiping about whom. Christina barely dodged a call from Al Sharpton.

    Christina came back strong with the vision of Granny Clampett opening a day spa. Isaac, whom we missed so very much, nominated the Band Name of the Day, Fround Apone! Christine and Kae took the kids to the petting zoo, but Astro selected two songs for the band to perform. Cap’nMac ran the phrase through CapSpeak, and somehow ended up in the armed services. Grampdaddy checked the menu.

    Lola served up fround apone and bacontinis for everyone, and totally ignored her stalker, who didn’t post again. Hmmmm. Isaac seemed alarmed, but Meredith, Christina, and the Cap went back for seconds. Hilarity ensued and Jinx came in for a poetic comment.

    Sheriff Lurkin longed for a waxed pig, and Grampdaddy longed to take it to the BBQ. NYChrochet mentioned a Day Spa that falsely advertised feline treatments. Litarider likened a cat facial to a fish pedicure, but Christina was squickly against it. LimeLolly tipped the cat with tuna, after the facial. Litarider, Silva Noir, Bridgete, and Lola compared their personal feline masseuses, with NYCrochet and sarajean close behind.

    LimeLolly wondered at the employment practices of the Farmacy, Christina asked for wine and Astro looked for bacontinis. ToBeScholarly suggested the resume be written in LolCat Speak. Isaac and Dan raised hackles, estheticians became real people, Mr.Winkey mentioned rumps, and Christina coughed up a good line. Grampdaddy refuted the argument that being a guy was an excuse, as presented to him by his missus. Smedley finished off the hackles, the Royal Coachman, and the Wooly Buggers. Capn translated. Isaac made an off-color remark, and Smedley ordered a steak.

    Christina, LimeLolly, and CJ debated the ins and outs of the world of making others beautiful. Smedley and Capn debated words and their meanings.

    Windrose snarked on the absent TacoMagic, then handed out slices of coffee. Litarider and Capn out-misspelled one another. Bianchi Sound was chatty, HamCan waxed philosophical, and Windrose was impressed. Christina brought it back home with a nasty nursery rhyme.

    Camille stopped in from a distant planet called Austria, where lions are misidentified just like home. Laurelhach panicked endemically, and Capn presented testimony why Humanity Is Doomed.

    A certain Ms. Brow presented her lowered case, and Lola and Christina came to her aid. Soon she was making arched comments again. Smedley got into some hair-raising tales about safety, or lack there of, from his personal experience. Lola encouraged him, and Capn explained about preset 911 buttons on phones. In an instant, everyone was transported back to their high school days and failed attempts at sun bleaching their hair. It wasn’t pretty. Sarajean did have a silver lining to her perm story, and Jinx commented on Smedley’s unsafe at any speed tales.

    Meredith changed into something more comfortable, Christina and Smedley flirted with her, and Bridgete bid us adieu as she set sail for Paris. Well-wishers gathered at the vitural docks, and Isaac and Capn had a net gain. Astro worried about Paris flooding. Kelli, pronounced Keeeleee, wondered how to pronounce Ile. Suggestions flew like pollen in the spring. Even Lou Stool had a go at it.

    SpaceBug dropped in to wax poetically, and Capn shared his technical difficulties. He blamed it on an unstable Schlegel, but Isaac thought it was cookies.

    Christina has been experiencing the YsaC Not.A.Curse, where things beginning with H haunt her life. Lou Stool brought up the flying monkeys, Windrose contributed items not to think about, but Lola pointed out an error in the story. Capn tried to cover it up, but Christina confessed. Lou Stool and LimeLolly wound up the day with reputations and gossip.

    Time to punch and come back in the morning. TTFN!

    Adores: 3
    • 2010 August 22
      Addicted Reader permalink

      That was excellent, do this more often! (It doesn't have to be as long, any amusing summary will do.)

      Adores: 1
      • 2010 August 22
        Windrose permalink

        AR, right now I'm focusing on the weekends because the comments are fewer, and there are so many regulars who can't check in when not at work. 8) Once I retire, I hope to be doing this more often. Thanks for the feed-back!

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 August 23
          Addicted Reader permalink

          Since I'm the opposite, and *can't* check in at work (except sometimes over my lunch break, like now), weekday summaries would be useful!

          But really, it's just entertaining to see how you sum up the day's craziness.

          Adores: 0
  24. 2010 August 22
    Windrose permalink

    Il Troobadore del YSaC, HamCan, Puchity Punch Punch! And thanks for the earworm, as well.

    G'Night, Farmville!

    Adores: 1
    • 2010 August 22

      *Sounds of guitar strings breaking*

      It was a music box!

      Thanks!

      Adores: 2
  25. 2010 August 23
    Moira permalink

    It is absolutely and utterly wrong, but I can't read the title of this post without thinking of the other meaning of "facial."

    Adores: 1
    • 2010 August 24
      Bombdude permalink

      I had the same issue... And then, in my own little mind, Schlegel turned to Kegel...

      Adores: 2
  26. 2010 September 2
    AliMcC permalink

    Yup, esthetician and aesthetician are both considered acceptable titles. My diploma says aesthetician, but I prefer esthetician.

    Adores: 0
  27. 2012 October 26
    Quiddity permalink

    en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cosmetology#Esthetician

    Actually, she's spelled *that* right. I'm boggled she got the rest of it wrong.

    Adores: 0
  28. 2013 August 3

    Two years later, and I still don't know the other meaning of the word facial. I may be more innocent than I think I am.

    Adores: 3
    • 2013 August 3
      nojazzhere permalink

      Windy...what about "pearl necklace" ???

      Adores: 2
      • 2013 August 3

        Oh. Oh! Yes, I see. Thanks. I think. 8)

        Adores: 1
        • 2013 August 3
          CapnMac permalink

          Eyes open/closed; wearing glasses, all Rule 34 territory.
          Urban dictionary spells this out in excessive (and under well-spelt) form.

          Adores: 0
  29. 2013 August 3

    If only there were a way to send a résumé to a Craigslist poster without having to make an appointment. What would we call it?

    Adores: 2
    • 2013 August 3
      zero.nada.none. permalink

      Presumptuous?

      Adores: 3
    • 2013 August 3

      Snark Mail?

      Adores: 0
  30. 2013 August 3
    HamCan permalink

    fround apone...found Capone hmmmmm...

    Adores: 1
  31. 2013 August 3
    CapnMac permalink

    Where is IF to tell us that "Beauty School Graduates" is a "The Spin Dryers" cover band?

    Adores: 1
  32. 2013 August 4

    Uh, Punch Punch, me.

    Good Morning, Ashticians!

    Adores: 0

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