moving boxes
€
they are little worn but a little good masking tape helps make them free in Rio Rico
The truth shall set you free.
Masking tape helps make you free.
Therefore, the truth is masking tape.
Thanks, kelli!
PS: Ahem. Dan just tried to tell me that the word “box” rhymes with the word “book”. He’s a loony.
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“They can take boxes but they cannot take our masking tape” just doesn’t have the same ring to it.
Neither does “freedom’s just another word for good masking tape.”
If I pack up tomorrow
Would you still remember me?
For I must be packing up, now,
‘Cause there’s two rolls of tape that’ll make me free.
But, if I left all my stuff here,
Things just couldn’t be the same.
‘Cause I’m as free as a box now,
And this box you can not change.
Lord knows, I can’t change.
*engages lighter app on smart phone* Free Box!!!
Ahem, I don’t recommend standing on corners and shouting that, Windrose. 8)
Speaking of corners, that one’s free …
Her name is Mona, she was a showgirl
But that was 30 years ago, when they used to have a show
Now it’s a U-Haul, but not for Mona
Still in the dress she used to wear, faded feathers in her hair
She sits there so refined, and drinks herself half-blind
She lost her boxes and she lost her masking tape
Now she’s lost her mind!
*Lobs a door at CJ*
*rubs noggin’*
Thanks, but next time warn a girl, will ya?
I think Napoleon posted this, letting Uncle Rico know that these boxes are free in Rio, hoping to tempt him to move out of the house. Cause Uncle Rico was a decroded piece of crap.
This ad is so moving! Take me down to the river and set my boxes free!
Oh, hello, officer. What, these boxes? No, they don’t belong to anybody now! They’re free! They can live the life they were meant to live. Born Free!
My identification? Oh, it’s back in the car. Of course I’ll go there with you. Bye bye, little boxes. Oh, wait. *throws masking tape into the river* Now the boxes are truly free. Ow, those cuffs are small, aren’t they?
PS. Dan may be a loony, drmk, but he’s your loony!
Let my boxes go!
That should be interesting from inside the box today, TM. Really, you breeze in on a Sunday, make one comment, and walk out with all the honors. It’s like magic. . . oh, wait.
They don’t call me sexy fingers for nothing. In fact, they don’t call me sexy fingers at all.
Thankfully. I’d have to take cold showers for the rest of my life.
I think Sparky is 18 1/2 minutes short from a box of impeaches…
Better than a box of impairs.
If a little good masking tape makes them free, what does a little bad masking tape do?
Leak.
PECIL!
See, that’s what Sparky’s doing wrong. Here in the South everyone knows that it’s DUCT tape that fixes everything. Got a hole in your jeans? Duct tape! Broke the handle on your bucket? Duct tape! Can’t find birth control at that critical moment? Duct tape!
Birth control, huh? I know a few people who ought to have duct-taped their boxes shut, in that case …
Getting used to this corner today.
After that comment, Lola, I’m joining you there.
Free range boxes, perhaps?
Which came first… the box or the pallet?
Oh, I know…. the big brown truck!
As someone who works for UPS, I can say this is true
I thought free range boxes were hookers without pimps.
I ain’t drawin’ that…
The term “deliver us” means something different when used for boxes.
I think… Either that or UPS is big on box emancipation and salvation.
“Our Folder, who works with boxes, holey be not your tape. Thy moving-truck come, thy boxes be worn, in Rio as across the line. Give us this day our coffee slices, forgive us our line-crossing, as we forgive those who Corey all up in our grills. And lead us not into mildew, for the styrofoam peanuts and packing crates are yours now and forever. Or until, y’know, ninjas. Ah, men.”
– The Bawks Prayer.
[a reverse exegesis]
To Greek:
1 φάκελος μας, ο οποίος εργάζεται με κουτιά, Ιερές τρύπες να μην ταινία σας.
2 Σου κίνηση-φορτηγό έρχονται, σου κουτιά να φορεθούν, στο Ρίο, όπως σε όλη τη γραμμή.
3 Δώστε μας σήμερα φέτες τον καφέ μας, να μας συγχωρέσετε μας γραμμή διέλευσης, όπως κι εμείς συγχωρούμε όσους Corey όλα επάνω σε σχάρες μας.
4 Και μη εισενέγκης ημάς εις το ωίδιο, για το φελιζόλ φιστίκια και κιβώτια συσκευασίας είναι δικά σας τώρα και για πάντα.
5 ή μέχρι, ξέρετε, νίντζα.
Αμήν.
Now, to google-Hebrew:
1 מעטפה לנו, עבודה עם תיבות, המחוררת לא הסרט.
2 שלך לנהוג משאית הקרובים, תיבות שלך כדי להשתפשף בריו, כמו מעבר לקו. 3 פרוסות תנו לנו היום הקפה שלנו, סלח לנו קו שלנו של הדרך, כפי שאנו סולחים למי קורי כל מעלה גריל שלנו.
4 וגם לא להוביל אותנו לתוך טחב על בוטנים קלקר ואריזה הם שלך מעתה ועד עולם.
5 או כך, אתה יודע, נינג’ות.
אמן.
Then, into google-latin:
I Involucrum nobis cooperante adipiscing non lectus perforata.
II your next magna justo, adipiscing sit amet worn in Rio, ut alterius finis.
III elit capulus da nobis hodie, dimitte nobis debita nostra recta viarum, sicut et nos dimittimus omnibus in nostris CRATICULA telarum.
IV aut nos inducas in musco et nunc et semper sunt tua peanuts styrofoam pede.
V Vel, scitis ninjas.
Amen.
Which giggles into spambot as:
1 Envelopings your working with us to be first perforated. Your next great just
2 I’ll be worn in the Rio, as other end.
3 Give us this day coffee Please, forgive us our right ways, as we also forgive all in our GRILL webs. Either we lead now and ever in the
4 With moss and styrofoam peanuts are your foot.
5 Or, you know ninja.
Amen.
Thus endeth the Lesson.
I love it!
I adore that “Or, you know ninja” comes through relatively unscathed. Maybe some points are just too important to get lost in translation?
Also, in Hebrew, ninjas becomes a feminine noun.
Pronounced neenjot (long O).
I think it’s my new favorite word.
Ninjettes? Wickedsauce. OOH does that mean they’d be easier to see ‘cos of the little pink bows on their ninja costumes?
Which is amusing, as, in Nihongo, ninja, 忍者, is both genderless and quantity-less. As are most noun-concepts in Japanese.
If we consider the state of being ninja, as ninja-do 忍者タオ, or ninja-jitsu 忍者柔術, then one may wear bows, frills, lace doilies, whatever; after all, ninja . . .
Oh.MY.GAWD…I literally laughed till I cried…pure awesomesauce.
:sweeps up tiny pieces of cardboard from cat’s last attempt to eat a box:
:places tiny pieces of cardboard in plastic baggie with roll of masking tape:
:posts ad on CraigsList – Free Box – Some Assembly Required:
I’ll bet I could make something really nifty out of that and my Simpson’s Individual Stringettes.
[demi-corey]
Having run out of packing tape–again–last night; and having decided I need 3-4 more boxes to finish packing, this entire post makes my joints hurt.
This packing an entire house, solo, including moving the furniture is some wearying.
*leaves to go get more tape*
[/d.corey]
€
When my baby,
When my baby packs for me I go to Rio,
Rio Rico, my-oh-me-oh.
I go to moving boxes and then I have to make them free-o,
in Rio Rico.
Now I’m not the kind of person
with a passionate persuasion for taping boxes,
domesday boxes.
But I give in to the urge,
And my hands apply the masking tape along the edges.
€
Woh-ho-oh-oh, when my baby
When my baby packs for me I go to Rio,
Rio Rico.
They are little worn,
but when my baby packs for me,
the masking tape lightens up my li-ife
And I am free at last, what a blast.
€
Lookit – Sparks is selling boxes-as-couture! This season’s collection lacks the pre-worn feeling which typified his previous collections, meaning the cardboard is yet to take on that supple, velvety feel so beloved by the connoisseur, but if the structured rigidity (which represents man’s inhumanity to man) is too much, Sparks, being at heart a ready-to-wear designer, suggests using masking tape to free up the joints. Ever the craftsman, though, Sparks will insist on seeing the type of tape you intend to use – anything less than a 70-scale will mean you cannot take home your Sparkle-original creation.
Clearly, the € indicates that these are European boxes. My good ol’ Amurkin stuff probably won’t fit in them.
What’s wrong with being a loony?
Squeeee! I mean, uh, that’s a Canadian thing, isn’t it? Eh?
Taco, here’s your Punchity Punch Punch, suitable for framing.
G’Night, Carl F. Dahl!