YSaC, Vol 1544: Flip this couch.

2013 June 27

6.5′ Tan/beige Couch w/ 3 cushions – $40

I am wanting to sell my 3 cushion couch for I am relocating to Mesa, Arizona roughly about July time frame this summer.

I am asking $50.00 for it. The picture does show that it was “Free” for when I got it but I would like to get some $$ back since I had to hire two guys’
to go and pick it up and bring to my place last fall.

I have other furniture for sale too: full size bed/ vending machines, curio cabinet, patio table set with 4 chairs, rocking chair( 2 different types,etc.)

Come and take a look at what I have for sale.

Call Patrick to make arrangments @ ###.###.####

Thanks folks.

Um. If you didn’t spend any money on it, then you’re not getting money “back.” You’re just getting money. You could, of course, have just taken a NEW picture of the couch without the free sign, but I suppose that would have been too much work.

Also, the curious line break after “guys'” makes me really wonder what you had moving it. Two guys’ girlfriends? Two guys’ sherpas? Two guys’ trained capybaras?

Plus – I want a bed vending machine. That way, when I need a new bed, I can just buy one.

Thanks for the post, Melanie!

26 Responses leave one →
  1. 2013 June 27

    Sparky is preparing for a brilliant career as a politician’s economic adviser.

    Adores: 4
  2. 2013 June 27
    MissMommyNiceNice permalink

    Ah, cat math at its finest! $50, $40, FREE! We have a winner! Spin the bedding vending machine and see what you’ve won! Some restrictions apply, you guys’ know what I mean!

    Adores: 5
  3. 2013 June 27

    With apologies to S&G:

    It’s a still life water Whirlpoop,
    Of a now free living room,
    As the sun shines through the Snark Lounge
    And Capn foresees doom.
    And we sit and slice our coffee
    Couched in our word problems,
    Like cats who do the math,
    You can hear a ghostcat laugh.
    In the dangling Commentators,
    And the Lurkers who just sigh,
    The Craigslist of our lives.

    Adores: 9
  4. 2013 June 27

    Anybody else read this as advertising a single item that is both a bed and vending machine rather than a vending machine from which you can buy beds? Though I’ve got to admit a bed vending machine would make some cleaning chores easier, especially if the bed in the machine was already made. Where would you store a machine large enough to store beds though? Especially if it contains king-size beds. I mean a dorm-sized bed vending machine you could put in your garage, back yard, or apartment foyer or parking lot, but if the machine offers anything above doubles then you’ve got to consider building a structure large enough to store it, and then there’s the issue of having two guys’ to help take the dispensed bed from the machine to the room, and are these the guys that also stock the machine? And does the machine take spare change, cash, checks, or only credit cards? Or this being the 21st century does it have a scanner in front of which you can swipe your smart phone showing a QR code tied to your bank account and make a purchase that way?

    Stream of consciousness at its best/worst.

    Adores: 3
    • 2013 June 27
      SilvaNoir permalink

      I see a bed/vending machine -not a vending machine that dispenses beds, but a bed with a vending machine either built in as a side table or headboard- being a product for the ultra lazy. Want some chips or a kitkat but don’t want to get out of bed? Plunk in some quarters and viola!

      Adores: 1
  5. 2013 June 27

    Did you check under the cushions? I bet there’s at least $40 – $50 in change there.

    Adores: 5
    • 2013 June 27

      What you want to do is dive right straight inbetween the second and eighth cushions, take a left at the auntie-juice stain that looks like Lincoln sneezing while wearing a basket of pineapples for a bowtie, and then just go straight on ’til you see the dead snake. The change deposits are on the left, can’t miss it. If you see the inflatable badger then you’ve gone too far.

      Adores: 2
  6. 2013 June 27

    Cat math!

    You ‘bought’ it for ‘FREE’, you’re asking $50 for it but you really want to get ‘back’ $40.

    Bugsy the Insane would like to counteroffer with the following:

    One large hairball, and related stomach contents deposited into your left shoe – probably without your foot inside.

    Shredding of appendages within a 3-ft. radius.

    And, I might add that when I used this particular catulator this morning I got those same results.

    Where shall I drop off the demon cat from hell payment?

    Adores: 10
  7. 2013 June 27
    nojazzhere permalink

    TC…already checked…it is “Free” of any change…but I’d recommend using a vaccination cleaner before taking it home…just sayin’.

    Adores: 3
  8. 2013 June 27
    HamCan permalink

    Patrick, Paaaaaaaaaaatrick, Paaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaatriiiiiiiiiiick!

    I would like something for a string quartet please, or a jug band…

    Adores: 2
  9. 2013 June 27
    andy permalink

    “I want to make a vending machine that sells vending machines. It’d have to be real f***ing big.”
    – Mitch Hedberg

    Adores: 1
  10. 2013 June 27
    Ralph permalink

    I count 8 cushions on the 3 cushion couch. The vending machine sells cushions.


    (Cat Geometry)

    Adores: 5
    • 2013 June 27
      nojazzhere permalink

      Maybe there are 5 cushions visiting the other 3… L.E.D…..(Miller Lite Geometry)

      Adores: 1
  11. 2013 June 27
    Irregular Fractal permalink

    Ah, but there’s that pesky slash in the bed/ vending machine. So I think it’s a combination piece. Probably one of those snack ones, because a refrigerated cold drink one would cause some temperature regulation problems.

    This is clearly part of a long-running Mythbusters test to see if Sparky will, indeed, kick her out of bed for eating crackers.

    Adores: 2
    • 2013 June 27
      Demon Duck of Doom permalink

      Not strictly a vending machine, more like Magic Fingers.

      Adores: 0
  12. 2013 June 27
    One Moving Violation permalink

    I am relocating to Mesa, Arizona roughly…
    Call Patrick to make arrangments

    So, is Patrick your florist or your travel agent? You know, a good travel agent could make your relocation much smoother.

    Adores: 2
    • 2013 June 27
      Demon Duck of Doom permalink

      I will call him Maybe, and maybe he can call me Al.

      Adores: 1
  13. 2013 June 27
    P-Rex permalink

    “Flip this couch.”..

    Yeah, I’ll need you to do that for me, okay?

    I have no middle finger.

    Adores: 1
  14. 2013 June 27
    P-Rex permalink

    You know what this picture is missing?

    A vaccuum cleaner.

    Patrick really is a noob at this craigslist thing.

    Adores: 3
  15. 2013 June 27
    Demon Duck of Doom permalink

    I’m guessing that the “FREE” sign is the only thing that still looks anything like the original photo at this point.

    Adores: 4
  16. 2013 June 27
    One Moving Violation permalink

    rocking chair( 2 different types,etc.)

    One chair of two types?
    Does it have two different types of rocker runners? Different arcs?

    Or are the materials different? One moment it gives you heavy metal, the next thing you know it gives you wood? Surreal man.

    I guess it’s possible. I have one computer and two types of fonts.

    Adores: 1
  17. 2013 June 27

    The bedbugs it gathered while sitting outside are provided at no extra cost!

    Adores: 3
    • 2013 June 27
      nojazzhere permalink

      I think this couch would really look good in my backyard, but I already have a French Prudential hammock and two mid-century modern milk crate tables back there. I’d have to completely change the decor in the yard, and in the oppressive Texas heat we’re experiencing right now, I just don’t want to deal with all that….never mind.

      Adores: 4
      • 2013 June 27
        Windrose permalink

        No. Really? Another Texan? *checks list* I thought we had our quota. I hope we don’t get fined.

        Adores: 2
  18. 2013 June 28
    tigprincess permalink

    Is Patrick’s brain in the curio cabinet?

    Adores: 1
  19. 2013 June 28

    Dave, In real life, you’re Jon Stewart, aren’t you? Punchity Punch Punch!

    Good Morning, Paddy O’Furniture!

    Adores: 0

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