YSaC, Vol. 1587: Off the beaten tractor
tv, chicken tractor
All items free for pickup in [location].
Absolutely unique chicken tractor made from a repurposed kids bunk bed. Needs a little repair.
Non-flat-screen tv. 37″. Gigantic! Heavy! But free! Works just fine; we’re upgrading our A/V for our new house.
I had to look this up, but a “chicken tractor” is a real thing – it’s a portable chicken coop. The problem is – that TV is huge. If I put it in there for the chickens to watch, there won’t be any room for the couch for them to sit on.
Oh, wait, I guess there will be, as long as I use THIS couch:
real couch purse !! – $40
real couch purse! in pretty good condition, that’s why its only $40
could be taken to the couch store to be repaired or to a leather repair store and be fixed up to be in perfect condition
i just bought a new couch purse and no longer need this one
Frankly, I wouldn’t have thought that purse was big enough to hold an entire couch, but maybe it’s the Grünekurzesofaohnebösedachs from two weeks ago. That was pretty small, right? At least, it’s probably small enough for the chickens. Except not with the TV too. That’s a big TV.
Wait, maybe they’re really small chickens. I’m so confused…
Thanks, Jason and sd!
Looks like they beat their chickens with the couch purse. This corner is so comfy first thing in the morning!
Aww, too bad about the purse. I was really looking for a real coax purse. They’re so hard to motivate.
It’s a trap! Another bird, the Millennium Falcon, was caught in the Death Star’s tractor beam at the former location of Alderaan. The chickens should know that if they watch TV.
I had to look this up, but a “tractor beam” is a real thing. Some versions use a Laguerre-Gaussian laser beam, creating photophoresis, or a form of reversed-thrust laser propulsion. Couched in less technical language, that means using light, not gravity, to push and pull stuff. Experimentally at least, sofa, so good.
Tits aside, if you put the TV in the tractor, the chickens will poop in it. Chicken poop smells bad enough without the addition of high voltage. Older TV’s had a “fine tuning” dial so you could adjust for minimum smoke; this appears to lack the necessary control, unless it’s on the remote, which the chickens will lose in the couch.
I thought Tractor Beam was Jim Beam’s non-alcoholic cousin.
A couch purse? Is that what this is?
(Warning: Excruciating adorableness.)
(Other warning: Will probably not play nicely with the chickens.)
That’s the cutest Not.A.Ferret I’ve seen in a long time!
The prize chickens get the top bunk. And get to pick what TV shows to watch.
Well, I’m sorry Sparky but my chickens are too highbrow for you, unless you can sell me a real couch chicken tractor.
Nothing but the best for my widdle snookum-wookums.
I don’t think any self respecting chicken would be caught dead in THAT chicken coop, watching THAT CRT TV, or carrying THAT ratty purse. Talkin’ ’bout TRAILER TRASH chickens!!!!!…….P.S. what was the kids’ bunk bed repurposed from, originally????
A cattle pen, most likely.
The trouble is always finding shoes for the couch that match the purse.
..and the drapes.
Just don’t put a clutch of purses in your coop of chickens.
OBVIOUSLY the purse is bigger on the inside. How else are you to ensure that you always have a comfortable couch with you for whenever you might need to sit?
Proposition 1) Non-flat-screen tv. (Probably caused by over-inflation.)
Proposition 2) Absolutely unique chicken tractor (Puts new meaning to chicken farm and I guess here, you pluck chickens from the ground)
Proposition 3) real couch purse! (My mother asked me how I liked her new purse. I told her, “Sit on it mom.” Hoo boy! Never do that again.)
So I’m just going to have to agree with Sparky’s signs he has behind the TV. I vote no on all 3 props.
Being a mere male (nor inclined to surveil coffee shops), I’m not attuned to such things–but, is there such a thing as a “coach” purse?
Not that helps the ad any–a “coach shop” probably better for repairing busses or athletic administrators . . .
[corey] Coach is a brand of designer handbags. So yes, there is indeed such a thing as a Coach purse. And if you take a broken one to the store they send it away to be repaired for free. If they can’t repair it, they send you a coupon for a new one. [/corey]
Of course! That’s where I’ve seen that purse before, on the sidelines at the football games!
I’d support that.
Oh, [chaws stalk of hay] ain’ no real trac’or lessen it’s raid or bloo, an’ has a metal seat. Kin allow how them Mahindra is ok, bit like havin’ a Bantam, ‘stead’a Rhode Isle Red …
[climbs back into air-conditioned, GPS & computer-equipped $185,000 4WD, 8-tire, New Holland to finish plowing today’s section {land area unit = 1 mile square; apx 66ac} . . .
How about a “free range” tractor?
Custom Made right here in Texas!! Sold!!
Tractor!? Well, I suppose I tracked her, then caught her, and then ate her…
…but I hardly knew her!
Brer, do you often eat women you hardly know? Okay, don’t answer that. And yes, I have my very own corner.
Aaron of Minneapolis, here’s your I Don’t Suck card. Hold it up right in front of your face so I can punch it. When the card has been completely punched out, you get a *free day of reading YSaC! Punchity Punch Punch!
*this offer expires in 30 days, is not valid in States with vowels, and has no bearing on reality. Your mileage may vary.
Good Morning, Super Chicken!