YSaC, Vol. 615: D’oh! A deer, a bedazzled deer …

2010 March 24

Deer Feet, gun/coat hanger, (be-dazzled.) – $50


This is a very unique piece, more for a young girls room. It has five deer feet that are used for hanging coats, but could also be used to set a gun on.The feet are painted to rezemble more of a zebra, and each hoof has rhinestones added to the tip. The backboard is black with speckled pink. Also forgot to mention there are five design handkerchiefs hanging from the hooves.Very unique piece, one of a kind, hope you like it!!

Because what young girl wouldn’t love to have a coat/gun rack made out of five bedazzled deer feet?

Thanks, Samantha!

251 Responses leave one →
  1. 2010 March 24
    penguin permalink

    Ick

    Double Ick

    Beyond Creepy

    (But I guess if you hang deer from your swing set, you probably would think this was cool)

    Adores: 8
    • 2010 March 24
      sarajean80 permalink

      Especially if you hollowed out the carcass to make a new swing seat. It would have the same “functional yet frightening” vibe this gives off.

      Adores: 14
      • 2010 March 24
        mudslicker permalink

        *Groan*

        Did you really have to “go there” sarajean? Now I can’t get the vision of Meatloaf out of my head from that Masters of Horror episode called “Pelts”.

        Just once I’d like to see some broccoli heads mounted on a wall!

        Adores: 7
        • 2010 March 24
          TacoMagic permalink

          I’m actually raising free range broccoli this year. If they grow nice and big I’ll stuff and mount one for you muddy.

          Adores: 5
        • 2010 March 24

          specially for mudslicker, because I had too much time on my hands

          http://i727.photobucket.com/albums/ww274/develish1/public%20album/broccolirack.jpg

          Adores: 4
        • 2010 March 24
          mudslicker permalink

          Taco, I have this vision of you mounting a broccoli and it’s NOT a pretty picture.

          Rule #34.

          Adores: 10
        • 2010 March 24
          TacoMagic permalink

          So much for broccoli being considered a wholesome food.

          The little tramps.

          Of course I’ve got this nice new tablecloth I need to christen…

          Adores: 3
        • 2010 March 24
          mudslicker permalink

          I dunno dev, that broccoli definitely needs a little BLING dontcha’ think? Those florets are just not speaking to me the way glitter and Swarovski crystals can.

          Adores: 3
        • 2010 March 24

          more bling you say, well I don’t normally do bling so much, but here goes….

          http://i727.photobucket.com/albums/ww274/develish1/public%20album/broccolirack1.jpg

          Adores: 2
      • 2010 March 24
        Meredith permalink

        You subscribe to Rob Zombie’s parenting and crafts magazine, Sarajean? I just saw that in the April issue!

        Adores: 6
        • 2010 March 24
          sarajean80 permalink

          I saw it in Febuary’s Better Homes and Taxidermy. They had a feature article on “101 Unusually Useful Mounts”. It was the same issue with the “101 Neat Feet Ideas”.

          Adores: 8
        • 2010 March 24
          Lola permalink

          Per the usual, the projects I saw recently in Martha Stewart’s Non-Living were deceptively simple-looking, but a bear to make; speaking of which, it was a rug. Turned out nice looking though, and as Martha always says, “It’s a dead thing.”

          Adores: 10
        • 2010 March 24
          sarajean80 permalink

          I had to cancel my subscription to The Zombie’s Home Journal. Every time I opened it it would just mutter “Brains!” and try to eat me.

          Adores: 6
        • 2010 March 24

          Sarajean’s articles could lead this thread into quite the yarn of bad jokes.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24
          sarajean80 permalink

          Gee, that’s never happened before.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24

          semi off-topic
          anyone else play Plants vs. Zombies?
          Best. Game. Ever.
          Okay, besides Super Mario Bros NES

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 March 24
          mudslicker permalink

          Kill two deermu with one stone:

          Clark’s Hooves & Feathers. They specialize in Emu products!

          http://www.clarkshoovesnfeathers.com/

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24
          sarajean80 permalink

          And they have mine hors!

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 24
          mudslicker permalink

          Are mine hors miniature horses?

          Oh snap! Because I could have sworn they were hors d’oeuvres. Which would have been yummier. “Could I have my mine hors on a cracker please?”

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 24
          TacoMagic permalink

          HHFN:

          There’s a zombie on your la-awn,
          there’s a zombie on your la-awn,
          there’s a zombie on your la-awn,
          We don’t want zombies on the laaaaawn.

          I know your type, tall, dark, and dead,
          you want to bite all the petals off of my head,
          and then eat the brains of the one who planted me here.

          I’m just a sunflower but see
          me power an entire infantry,
          You like the taste of brains;
          we don’t like zombies.

          And now, that is stuck in your head.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24
          Meej permalink

          Emu Oil?

          drmk, do we want to know what that’s for?
          (Is Dan squeaking?)

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24

          Yup, Taco, that’s the song i play on my ghettoblaster when i roll through the hood.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 March 24
          penguin permalink

          Emu oil is a great moisturizer. A drop or two goes a long way. I bought some years ago when I took a pottery course and the clay really dried out my hands. Emu sausage, on the other hand, wasn’t for me.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 March 24
          Windrose permalink

          (Wherever this ends up, it’s in reply to HHNF) Yes, I LOVE Plants vs. Zombies! I haven’t made it very far, but it truly rocks. 8)

          Adores: 1
    • 2010 March 24

      I’m not sure even a double ick does this one justice, maybe a triple or quadruple ick would be more accurate?

      Adores: 2
  2. 2010 March 24
    sarajean80 permalink

    It looks like it’s giving me the finger. Or hoof, I guess.

    Who in their right mind would put this in a child’s room, much less a girl’s?

    “Gee, thanks Dad! Now I have somewhere to keep my Hannah Montana Remington 700 with the pink glitter stock!”

    Adores: 35
    • 2010 March 24

      You might be surprised. Taco told me that there was a whole section on the Hannah Montana forums dedicated to “Decorating with Severed Animal Feet”

      Adores: 13
      • 2010 March 24
        Lola permalink

        Apparently that’s the Hannah Rural Montana section.

        Adores: 22
        • 2010 March 24
          sarajean80 permalink

          I don’t think I’ve seen that before. I must go to the wrong Wal-Mart.

          Adores: 3
        • 2010 March 24
          Bianchi Sound permalink

          There’s a right Wal-Mart?

          Adores: 18
        • 2010 March 24
          sarajean80 permalink

          Sure, there’s one right down the street.
          Just remember to keep your hands inside the cart at all times and flash photography is not only permitted but encouraged.

          Adores: 4
        • 2010 March 24

          I know I’m late on this, but … There’s an urban Montana?

          Adores: 5
        • 2010 March 24
          Lola permalink

          Isaac, there are a few smallish cities in Montana (I have family there and visited it regularly as a child). Urban Montana is probably at least somewhat equivalent to urban Vermont, if that helps as a point of reference.
          So, there’s urban-ish Montana, rural Montana, and seriously undeveloped and unamenitied Montana (the latter being, while not always easy to get to (e.g., no roads, so must fly in) or friendly to humans, sometimes the most beautiful part).

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24
          mudslicker permalink

          Isaac:

          Yes, and it’s not pretty. It’s called Butte and I believe they only attached the “e” on there just to give it a fancy French flair. Then they missed the concept entirely by making the “e” silent.

          Adores: 5
        • 2010 March 24

          Mud, I saw a bumper sticker in southern Idaho that said ‘I like it in the Butte’
          I almost died laughing. Best insurance claim ever.

          Adores: 8
        • 2010 March 24
          mudslicker permalink

          I bet it was on a mini-van! Those soccer moms are FREEEeaaaaakkkkyyyy!

          Glad to see you were able to accommodate her when you rear-ended her. Happy ending!

          Adores: 5
        • 2010 March 24

          Better: semi-truck. I’ll bet he never hears the ‘end’ of it.

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 24
          mudslicker permalink

          Musta’ been a Peterbilt.

          Adores: 3
      • 2010 March 24
        mudslicker permalink

        I’m more disturbed that Taco knew that.

        Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24
          TacoMagic permalink

          You should see the Hannah Montana elephant leg dresser I made.

          I painted it with that flavored glitter so that when I lick it I taste Strawberries!

          Adores: 12
        • 2010 March 24
          Lola permalink

          Taco just reminded me of a favorite Far Side: elephant in phone booth, with a crutch and leg stump: “They made it into a what?”

          Adores: 5
    • 2010 March 24
      BigUncleJohn permalink

      I kinda think that these girls would like to have this…

      I gonna hazard a guess that amongst our commentators there are a few things hanging on your collective walls that would cause these girls to cringe — show of hands, who has a cat figurine within sight? Personally, as a kid, I always wanted to use figurines for target practice with the pellet gun. Much more satisfying destruction than the styrofoam cups filled with water.

      Adores: 3
      • 2010 March 24
        mudslicker permalink

        One of these pics is
        not like the other
        One of these pics
        just doesn’t belong…

        I sure hope that doe bites that woman’s face off. Thanks *grumble grumble* for sharing BUJ..

        The only thing that comes to mind that would make these she-men cringe would be a couple dozen Precious Moments figurines ambushing them from behind a bush.

        *Please duck to avoid the red laser light*

        Adores: 1
      • 2010 March 24
        penguin permalink

        Actually I have something they would probably love sitting next to the TV in my office (I work at home). http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=43172524 but mine has candles in it.

        I got it at a White Elephant Christmas Party a couple of years ago. I was going to wrap it up to take to last year’s but didn’t go. It will go to this year’s whether I go or not.

        It clashes with my long “haired” African mask name Fred.

        Adores: 0
      • 2010 March 24
        sarajean80 permalink

        Since nobody else has said it…
        Hey girls! NICE RACKS!

        Adores: 2
  3. 2010 March 24

    Poor Dancer and Vixen!

    Adores: 2
    • 2010 March 24
      Meredith permalink

      Don’t feel bad for them…they look FABulOUUUUUUSSSSSSS!!!!

      Adores: 6
      • 2010 March 24
        sarajean80 permalink

        I don’t know if I would have gone with that color rhinestone. Vixen’s always been an ottom.

        Adores: 9
        • 2010 March 24
          TacoMagic permalink

          He wears one black hoof, covered in rhinestone.

          Adores: 2
  4. 2010 March 24
    jackie31337 permalink

    The only thing preventing this from being featured on Regretsy is the fact that it was posted on Craigslist.

    Must not let my future in-laws see this. They might think it’s the perfect gift for my daughter. Their new house includes a trophy room with animal heads on just about every wall.

    Adores: 7
    • 2010 March 24
      Meredith permalink

      If they don’t have bedazzled hooves, fake eyelashes, or makeup, then I’m not impressed.

      Or wigs! WIGS would be AWESOME!!!

      Adores: 8
      • 2010 March 24
        TacoMagic permalink

        If I had a severed animal head, I’d put it in a top hat with a big cigar in his mouth.

        I’d also make it say, “Indubidably!” whenever it heard somebody talking around it.

        Adores: 5
        • 2010 March 24
          kireina permalink

          So, basically, you’re thinking your standard talking stuffed animal heads from Country Bear Jamboree, but tarted up a little?

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 24
          TacoMagic permalink

          Hehe those silly country bears and their Jamboree.

          *Hrrruum* No, totally not the same.

          Adores: 4
      • 2010 March 24
        jackie31337 permalink

        Meredith: Believe me, I was tempted, but I was visiting for a week, and I didn’t want to get kicked out of the house.

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 24
          Meredith permalink

          I always kind of wanted a mounted head on my wall. But all my exes were light sleepers. I was gonna even give them googley eyes!

          Adores: 9
        • 2010 March 24
          Lola permalink

          Who would have had the googly eyes, Meredith – the mounted heads or your exes? Is that why you broke up?

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24
          Meredith permalink

          Lola: uhhhh, the heads. Totally not my exes….or my exes mounted heads. Nope, not thinking that at allll. he…he…he…

          Adores: 4
        • 2010 March 24
          Lola permalink

          That’s what I figured, Meredith, but I was highly amused by the “exes were light sleepers, was gonna give them googly eyes” sentence construction because the possible cause and effect situation there was … weird and nonintuitive, to say the least. Not that that’s anything new for the comments here (much less the OPs).

          Adores: 2
  5. 2010 March 24
    sarajean80 permalink

    I want some of whatever these people took that made them think this was a good idea. Because unless they happened upon a deer with five feet, it would take more than one to make this glittering monstrosity. That implies some level of planning. I am now very curious as to what happened to the other three feet.
    I’m guessing at least one’s a bong now.

    And what is with the handkerchiefs? Were these deer rival gang members?

    Adores: 31
    • 2010 March 24
      penguin permalink

      The other three were painted orange and black in a not.a.lion pattern and hang in the shed out back to hold the spoons, etc. for the moonshine still. They aren’t bedazzled cuz Uncle Billy Bob tends to get distracted by shiny things.

      Adores: 15
      • 2010 March 24
        mudslicker permalink

        Oh, I bet one was made into a backscratcher.

        Another was made into a ball point pen for keeping score in horseshoes (they don’t realize you don’t really keep score in horseshoes).

        And the third into a bottle opener that plays the theme song from Born Free every time you use it.

        Adores: 7
    • 2010 March 24
      Lola permalink

      I, too, was wondering either where the other three feet (aren’t they hooves? just wondering) went, or what the deer with the five hooves looked like.
      If not a bong, then a holder for a meth pipe, Sarajean.

      Adores: 3
      • 2010 March 24
        sarajean80 permalink

        I think, and I might be wrong (been known to happen) that deer walk on their tippy-toes, like cats. The hoof is the cloven bit on the end (like a toenail) but the foot is the whole thing.
        Like I said, I could be wrong, it’s not like I spend a lot of time staring at deer feet.

        Adores: 5
      • 2010 March 24
        Bianchi Sound permalink

        The three feet are in the yard, of course.

        Adores: 29
        • 2010 March 24

          How dare you do real math here?!

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24

          I agree, I thought we only allowed cat math in here, which of course means the answer is tuna sammich.

          Adores: 3
      • 2010 March 24
        Meredith permalink

        WITCH! WITCH! WITCH, I SAY! They useth the “maths” of the devil, rather than our righteous Cat Match!

        Adores: 9
        • 2010 March 24

          He turned me into a newt, he did.

          Adores: 6
        • 2010 March 24
          CapnMac permalink

          We will need the largest set of scales!

          Adores: 4
        • 2010 March 24
          sarajean80 permalink

          And he didst striken my cattle so they giveth soured cream.

          *whispers*

          What? I didst not knoweth we hadeth a bull. Why wouldeth the bull giveth soured cream?

          *more whispers*

          Oh.

          I withdraweth my complaint.

          Adores: 29
        • 2010 March 24

          What else floats?

          Adores: 3
        • 2010 March 24

          Ohmaigawd Sarajean. Everyone that’s procrastinating with me just about died laughing. If we could all give you +1’s, you’d have elebenty.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24
          Meredith permalink

          A duck?

          Adores: 3
        • 2010 March 24

          Very small rocks

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 March 24
          CapnMac permalink

          I got better.

          I want to go for a walk . . .

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 24
          TacoMagic permalink

          Churches!

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24
          CapnMac permalink

          I have to go to the feasting on the robins, sloths, orangutang et al;
          but, when I get back,
          it’ll be

          The Holy hand-grenade of Auntie-ottom!

          Adores: 1
    • 2010 March 24
      Meredith permalink

      Hoove Tang Clan ain’t nothin to F*ck wit, sarajean. They gonna cutya…cutya hooves off!

      Adores: 14
    • 2010 March 24
      TacoMagic permalink

      One word SJ: Hoofchucks!

      It’s like nunchucks, only frightening rather than awesome.

      Adores: 8
    • 2010 March 24
      CapnMac permalink

      My catulator indicates this is Not.A.Lion-math.

      Which is why five-footed deer = bedazzler.

      Or why we cerf the net.

      Adores: 1
  6. 2010 March 24
    Randomname permalink

    I’m happy to learn that it’s a unique piece. That means that after it’s destroyed, there’s no risk to see another of those horrors.

    Adores: 18
    • 2010 March 24
      Lola permalink

      Four little words: Kill it with fire. 🙂

      Adores: 6
      • 2010 March 24
        TacoMagic permalink

        It’s almost worth the $50 just for the opportunity to destroy it.

        Then again, you’d also have to shell out another $500 for the priests and holy water.

        Adores: 7
        • 2010 March 24
          Lola permalink

          And whatever fire insurance will cost you. Just because you try and burn it in the back yard doesn’t mean your home will be safe …

          Adores: 3
      • 2010 March 24

        Napalm is so much more effective, and it burns just as long and hot as our hatred.

        Adores: 3
        • 2010 March 24
          sarajean80 permalink

          And put in some sparklers!

          No reason, I just like sparklers.

          Adores: 6
    • 2010 March 24
      CapnMac permalink

      No, sadly, anyone who would make one of these, would not stop there.

      There’s always more bad craft to be done, ottom it.

      Adores: 2
      • 2010 March 24
        sarajean80 permalink

        There should be at least a matched pair.

        ‘Cause what’s the point of having just one?

        Adores: 5
    • 2010 March 24

      May I briefly express my pedantic outrage at the repeated phrase “very unique”?

      Thanks.

      UNIQUE MEANS ONE OF A KIND. IT CANNOT BE INTENSIFIED. ANYTHING UNIQUE IS ALREADY AS UNIQUE AS IT CAN BE.

      Okay. I had ot get that off my chest.

      Adores: 13
      • 2010 March 24
        mudslicker permalink

        ot = to

        I hate Type-A on Corey-Wednesday!

        *sigh*

        Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24

          ot to, brute.

          Adores: 5
        • 2010 March 24

          By the way, I was having cookie / cache problems today that kept me from editing my own posts. (And kept me from reading all the comments, for that matter, because I’d keep getting booted off the site after each post I made.)

          Hopefully that’s all resolved now.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 March 25
          Bianchi Sound permalink

          I was having a cookie problem, too, but I ran out of cache, and they threw me out of the bakery…

          Adores: 6
      • 2010 March 24
        Bianchi Sound permalink

        Geez, Isaac, I was wondering when you would get around to that. I thought I was going to have to put on my President Bartlet avatar…

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 24

          That single moment in The West Wing convinced me to watch the show for like two whole seasons.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 March 25
          Bianchi Sound permalink

          I’m glad that wasn’t too obscure.

          I can’t hear the word “unique” without thinking about that scene. Let alone “very unique” or “extremely unique.”

          Adores: 0
  7. 2010 March 24
    Windrose permalink

    This was the very rare, conjoined-twin deer of the upper Outer Wetlands Forrest. For years, this doe wandered with the herd, on her five feet, and was thought to bring a special good luck to anyone who happened to see her. Then one day, while running from hunters, she tripped over her own five feet. And the rest is history. Now pay the $50 and I’ll be on my way.

    Adores: 11
  8. 2010 March 24
    Camille permalink

    Aside from the “ick” factor, there’s the “painted to resemble more of a zebra” factor. These don’t resemble any more.of.a.zebra I’ve ever seen. More.of.a.zebras, like not.a.lions, have stripes.

    Adores: 11
    • 2010 March 24
      Cindy B. permalink

      And I’m not sure what species of zebras have rhinestones on their hooves. Maybe they consider zebras mythical creatures which exist only in our imaginations (and in the haze generated by crack pipes.)

      Adores: 8
      • 2010 March 24
        sarajean80 permalink

        I’m surprised they didn’t say they were unicorn hooves. That would be a magical decorating accessory any young girl would love.

        After the weeping stopped and the meds kicked in, of course.

        Adores: 8
  9. 2010 March 24

    …..and hanging just outside the window…….

    Adores: 3
  10. 2010 March 24

    Windrose, do you think a little punch would perk Depressy up?

    Adores: 2
    • 2010 March 24
      Lola permalink

      Something tells me the only thing that perks Depressy up is poisoned coffee in his mug-head, but it’s worth a try.

      Adores: 6
      • 2010 March 24
        Depressy permalink

        Stealing Bianchi Sound’s punch make Depressy very happy!

        Adores: 5
        • 2010 March 24
          Bianchi Sound permalink

          Up yours, Depressy!

          Adores: 10
        • 2010 March 24
          Meej permalink

          Roses are red,
          Violets are blue,
          I’m a schizophrenic,
          And so am I?

          Adores: 4
        • 2010 March 24
          Windrose permalink

          Bad! Bad Depressy! Back in your cave! Punch, punch, punch!

          Adores: 0
      • 2010 March 24
        sarajean80 permalink

        Reminder to self: Never drink Kool-Aid with Depressy.

        Adores: 2
  11. 2010 March 24
    Colleen in MA permalink

    Also forgot to mention we can create coat hangers out of your dear, deceased pet feet. Fido can be your helpful best friend, always!

    One step worse than this.

    Adores: 6
    • 2010 March 24
      Camille permalink

      I don’t know, Colleen – making a sweater out of your live pet’s hair doesn’t seem nearly as creepy to me as having dead feet hanging around. I mean, we wear sweaters made of sheep hair, don’t we? Though if your dog-hair sweater got wet, you’d walk around smelling like wet dog for the rest of the day, which is probably not a good thing

      Adores: 5
      • 2010 March 24
        Colleen in MA permalink

        For a while I was seriously considering making a scarf out of my cat’s hair, but that was back in my single days, and my friends made me swear not to do it – out of fear that any potential dates would go running away after learning about the scarf. LOL But yeah, on the grand scale of creepiness, hanging feet outrank pet hair any day!

        Adores: 3
      • 2010 March 24
        jackie31337 permalink

        I’ve also considered sending in my cat’s hair to be spun into yarn. Getting it made into yarn is expensive though, and I’m allergic to cats (and yet I have one, go figure) so I wouldn’t really want to wear anything I knitted with it. Then there’s also the wet dog/cat smell factor.

        Adores: 2
      • 2010 March 24
        sarajean80 permalink

        If you made a sweater for your dog out of yarn spun from its own hair, would it be the same as dividing by zero?

        Somebody try that and let me know what happens.

        Adores: 5
        • 2010 March 24
          jackie31337 permalink

          It would be like Shaun the sheep wearing a sweater made of his own wool.

          Adores: 4
    • 2010 March 24
      sarajean80 permalink

      Sweet mother, they’ve spun Not.A.Lion yarn!

      I must admit, I find it fascinating that I could literally knit a kitten with leftover cat hair.

      Adores: 4
      • 2010 March 24
        jackie31337 permalink

        Were you the one who linked me to the knit a kitten pattern? I’ve made two of those (with yarn, not with cat hair) for my daughter now, and she loves them so much she wants me to knit a couple more so she can have a complete cat family.

        Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24
          sarajean80 permalink

          Guilty. They are super cute.

          Adores: 1
    • 2010 March 24
      TacoMagic permalink

      Two creepy ass words:

      Family Hairloom

      And yes, I’ve seen several of these in variuos museums and mansion tours. They always gives me the jeebies. The worst was a tablecloth. *ghehelbleh*

      Adores: 0
      • 2010 March 24
        TacoMagic permalink

        Oh, it should be noted that many of the pieces I’ve seen (including the tablecloth) were made with hair harvested from recently deceased family members as a way to preserve a small part of them.

        *hurf*

        Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24
          Lola permalink

          I’ve seen pins that were a few strands of hair looped and knotted into a design, but … tablecloth?
          *runs from room with hand over mouth*

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24

          ok, where’s that bleach Lola, I think I need a bucket full after thinking about dead feet and table cloths made of dead peoples hair

          Adores: 1
      • 2010 March 24
        mudslicker permalink

        That explains why my pin smells like Dippity Doo and Head and Shoulders!

        Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24
          Meredith permalink

          Gee Your Hair Smells Delicious…even after you’re gone!

          Adores: 6
      • 2010 March 24
        Meredith permalink

        I could make a fully wardrobe from my man’s hair right now, and still have enough for a pair of drapes.

        And it is the hair on his HEAD, you guys! Other than his formerly long, lustrious locks, he can barely grow anything. Poor guy can’t even get a smidge of a beard.

        Adores: 3
        • 2010 March 24
          Lola permalink

          If you do have drapes made, will they match the carpet?

          (Sorry, couldn’t resist.)

          Adores: 6
        • 2010 March 24
          sarajean80 permalink

          You could save his combings and fix that.

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 24
          jackie31337 permalink

          Ok, that confirms yet again that you’re not my cousin. Her husband is nearly bald.

          Adores: 2
    • 2010 March 24
      sarajean80 permalink

      I wonder if anyone would taxidermy a person’s driving finger into a coathook? ‘Cause if so, I need to change my burial instructions.

      Adores: 4
      • 2010 March 24
        Meredith permalink

        I want a key hook that’s a finger, so it always looks like my wall is motioning “C’mere, you!”

        Adores: 6
        • 2010 March 24
          sarajean80 permalink

          Like these?

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 24
          jackie31337 permalink

          sarajean: that is unbelievably awesome! “Sold in fours because this importer doesn’t deal in thumbs.”

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24

          seems you beat me to it sarajean, I just found these

          http://nerdapproved.com/household/finger-hooks/

          Adores: 1
  12. 2010 March 24
    mudslicker permalink

    There’s probably more than one rabbit who is very happy to see this “zebra spangled piece”.

    Like the Chick-fil-A cows, the bunnies mottoes’ are: “For good luck, desecrate more deer hooves!”

    How Easter appropriate!

    Adores: 9
  13. 2010 March 24
    JAMen permalink

    I have to wonder if these folks weren’t selling a swingset awhile back. It seems they made use of the normally “useless” carcass parts. But…I didn’t notice the deer having an extra hoof…

    But, glad to see their little girl has grown up and moved on! She doesn’t need the trappings of youth anymore. Craigslist is so much easier than a yardsale. And now they can go git her a new gun with the earnin’s.

    Adores: 5
    • 2010 March 24
      mudslicker permalink

      I read that last word too quickly and thought it said “earrings” and screamed,
      “Good God™, you can buy Bambi at Claire’s!?!”

      Adores: 8
      • 2010 March 24
        sarajean80 permalink

        The “Bits of Bambi” collection is right next to the Thumper jewelry boxes.

        Oooh! Band name! Bits of Bambi

        Adores: 4
        • 2010 March 24

          They could provide the soundtrack for the remake of Pieces of April.

          Adores: 1
  14. 2010 March 24
    Meredith permalink

    “more for a young girls room…” “more of a zebra…”

    They forgot one: “more of a nightmare inducing abomination”.

    Adores: 13
    • 2010 March 24
      CapnMac permalink

      “more of a nightmare inducing abomination”

      For consideration:
      This was in someone’s room (hence the handkerchiefs), where are they now?

      Just who went in that room, took a look, and said “Hey, I bet we can get $50 for this”?

      Someone made this item. They found/had-on-hand taxidermy deer foot forms, and carefully mounted the hide & hoof to those forms. Someone then bedazzled the hooves. All of these are volitional acts. Just what color is the sky in their world?

      Very frightening that, for someone, this might not be nightmare or abomination. But, that’s ok, they probably would hire scantily-clad folks to liven up a funeral or two, after mounting the slightly-used stripper pole to the swing set.

      O, o’er Flanders fields, rent by armwar
      Grows the single blossom, bedazzler
      Burton bloom in venison-soaked soil
      Where the Ant and Not.A.Lion toil

      Adores: 9
      • 2010 March 24
        Lola permalink

        I can’t begin to guess the color of the sky in their world, but it seems a safe bet to assume that, whatever it is, it is ugly and tasteless.

        Adores: 4
        • 2010 March 24

          that may be the case, but considering what they’re likely smoking they probably think it’s very purty.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24
          TacoMagic permalink

          Unlike my elephant leg amore: Which is ugly and tastes like strawberries.

          Adores: 4
        • 2010 March 24

          I’m sorry, but in true HHNF form, I must point out that you said elephant leg love. That tastes like strawberries. I don’t even want to know where the lip gloss was involved.

          Adores: 5
        • 2010 March 24
          sarajean80 permalink

          Maybe you should try decoupage, TM. If I have learned anything from my time spent in thrift stores, it is that decoupage covers a multitude of sins. And makes them worse.

          Adores: 7
        • 2010 March 24
          TacoMagic permalink

          Well… how else do you think they fill fruit-cream doughnuts?

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24

          I think I’ll be eating much more healthily now.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24
          TacoMagic permalink

          Glad I could help the diet.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24
          sarajean80 permalink

          But what about the custard…

          You know, I’m better off not knowing.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24

          you have to eat your sausage before you get the pudding.

          Adores: 3
        • 2010 March 24
          CapnMac permalink

          Elephant Leg Love playing the Flying Pig 2Nite
          Special £5 matinee after Tea!

          Adores: 2
  15. 2010 March 24
    Nanners permalink

    Why not improve on Mother Nature’s creation by bedazzling it?!

    Those poor deer.

    Adores: 2
  16. 2010 March 24
    Heather permalink

    What better way to display the Deerly Departed than by combining the whimsical glittery goodness of a Bedazzler with simple utility? I, for one, have already replaced all of my switchplates with Bedazzled doe ears and I also use deer teeth to babyproof the electrical outlets. What part of a deer *can’t* be used? I’ll tell you: none of it.

    Adores: 8
  17. 2010 March 24

    Hey sweety, guess what Mommy found for your room! You know how much you loved the movie Bambi? Now you can have something in your room that reminds you of all those pretty deers. I bet a couple of these feet might even be from Bambi’s mom. Why are you crying?

    Adores: 9
    • 2010 March 24
      mudslicker permalink

      Oh, alleviate some of the horror and just tell your child,

      “Don’t fret none too much sweetie. About that deer? I heard he shot his self.” [sic]

      Adores: 11
      • 2010 March 24
        TacoMagic permalink

        You weren’t crying last night when you were enjoying those venison steaks I made.

        Adores: 8
        • 2010 March 24
          Meredith permalink

          True story: my dad was driving home when I was about 12, and someone in front of him hit a deer. There in our ritzy suburban neighborhood (wasn’t our house, just a fluke that we lived there) he hauled it into the back of his pickup, picked up me and my mom, and made us go with him to a house where someone would clean it.

          Then, every time my mom served dinner, he’d wait till we were eating and start talking about how beautiful it was right before the lady creamed it with her minivan. Yeah, my dad’s kind of an ass.

          Adores: 8
      • 2010 March 24

        He went ‘an hero’ after watching Bambi.

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 24
          Meredith permalink

          My mom was no better. I’m a brave eater, and I’ve always been up to trying anything once. I ordered rabbit stew once in Williamsburg (going back to me and my “different” childhood). It shows up and is DELICIOUS! My mom tastes it, decides she likes it better than her food. So she begins to sing.

          “Here comes Peter Cotton Tail…”

          I ate bread.

          Adores: 11
        • 2010 March 24
          TacoMagic permalink

          That’s totally inapproriate and your mom is a jackass.

          Everyone knows you should sing “Little Bunny Fufu” when you’re stealing rabbit stew.

          Speaking of rabbit stew: YUM!

          Adores: 7
        • 2010 March 24

          Next time my dad tries to name one of my buns ‘Stewart’, I’ll have his head mounted on my wall.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24
          CapnMac permalink

          Just be careful it’s not Cymru rarebit, or it’ll be dog of the hare that bit you.

          ” ‘E’s vicious, ‘e is; look’it the faanngs, the fangs!”

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24
          Lola permalink

          I have a friend whose in-laws are French.
          In France, the Easter Bunny does not bring you your treats, the churchbells do (long story, best told by David Sedaris if you’re interested). So they have no Easter bunny tradition there.
          My friend went to her in-laws for Easter dinner, and they served … wait for it … hare.

          Imagine reindeer steak at Christmas. (I have a friend who ate it in Iceland and said it was delicious, but it wasn’t at Christmas time.) While hare and rabbit are not the same, it was close enough that my friend was traumatized into thinking, “We’re eating the Easter bunny!”

          Adores: 5
        • 2010 March 24

          That’s the most foul, cruel and bad-tempered rodent you ever set eyes on! It’s got a vicious streak a mile wide.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24
          CapnMac permalink

          He got Bors and Ector, that’s five. (Three, sire.)
          Robin, go an change your armor!

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 24
          jackie31337 permalink

          Lola: reindeer isn’t a traditional Christmas food in Finland, but it is eaten often (it shows up on the cafeteria menu at work regularly). I wouldn’t be surprised if some people eat it at Christmas.

          Adores: 2
  18. 2010 March 24
    Meej permalink

    Here we see the hooves of a prime example of Odocoileus urbanicus sub. pentapodia, the Western Urban Five-Footed Deer. These are clearly recognizable by the species tendency to accent the hoof with small sparkling stones, a process known as “bedazzling” or “bling,” which is believed to make them more attractive to young females. Males of the species are recognizable by their distinctive call, said to sound like “Ungulate life 4 evah!”

    The five-legged subspecies, of course, is even more clearly recognizable.

    Adores: 9
    • 2010 March 24
      mudslicker permalink

      I can hear David Attenborough whispering this now.

      Love that taxonomic classification!

      Adores: 4
  19. 2010 March 24

    *three-legged doe hobbles into clearing*
    Awww, giiirl, I’m boutsta tell you sumpfin dat gon curl yo antlers. You know me and my girl Faline just went an gots our nails did and wuddayah know, some jive-ass honkey be sitting right in dat tree ober dere on Pine and Brook, and he done merked on our tails. An yaknow wha? That redneck crackah done jacked our new nails. You best believe it, sistah. He swept us off our feet right good. I gotsa-way wif three a my legs, but Feline, she weren’t so lucky. I tell you, those crazy rednecks be turnin this neighborwood into a right meadow. Can’t go nowheres wifout somebody tryin shoot yo ass.

    Adores: 7
    • 2010 March 24

      I have the feeling that, although quite thinly veiled, this might be misconstrued as racist. Al Sharpton has got to be hiding somewhere around he….*Black Not.A.Lions attack*

      Adores: 0
      • 2010 March 24
        Meredith permalink

        Then I’m getting mauled for mine, too.

        :::peeks over desk wearing safari hat::: I’m ready for any Not.A.Lion attacks. I’m gonna make it into a comforter.

        Adores: 6
    • 2010 March 24
      Meredith permalink

      Giiiirrrrl, I KNOW. But you hear what they did ta Thumper? Some stupid kid found him and took him home. So he’s stuck in this box, which ain’t so bad, cause he was gettin all the carrots he could eat, and the missus w’ant around to give him crap about bangin those fiiine lookin tame rabbits.

      Then some bitch shows up, and…lean close….she COOKS him. That kids dad had some crazy ex, and the crazy crackah hoe goes and cooks him up for dinner.

      Man…human bitches is craaaazy.

      Adores: 8
      • 2010 March 24

        I tol him all dat talk bout dem lucky feeta his wain’t gon do him no good.

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 24
          Meredith permalink

          Ain’t so lucky now, girrrrl! HA! Put that third hoof up here so I can fix it. You wanna French Manicure this time?

          Adores: 3
      • 2010 March 24
        mudslicker permalink

        The one who cooked him wasn’t the You’re-Not-Going-To-Ignore-Me-Dan! one was she?

        Adores: 1
  20. 2010 March 24

    Now you to can own the whole set!

    http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=39840615

    Adores: 1
    • 2010 March 24

      Deer God.

      Adores: 2
      • 2010 March 24
        TacoMagic permalink

        LOVED TO DEATH!

        You keep using that phrase; I don’t think it means what you think it means.

        Adores: 5
        • 2010 March 24

          Yah, I had the same thoughts on, ’til death do us part’. I thought you were supposed to have a set date. The judge informed me that wasn’t the case.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24
          Meredith permalink

          ” ’til death do us part’? How’s Friday at 5 work for you?”

          Adores: 3
        • 2010 March 24

          Looks like I’m open, but I need to be promised googly-eyes and a place over the mantle before our meeting.

          Adores: 4
    • 2010 March 24
      mudslicker permalink

      That deer stands like Charlie Chaplin.

      Adores: 2
    • 2010 March 24
      penguin permalink

      looks like bambi had too much to drink at the party

      Adores: 5
      • 2010 March 24
        sarajean80 permalink

        You know it’s been a good party when a disembodied deer puts on a lampshade.

        Adores: 6
    • 2010 March 24
      CapnMac permalink

      Spooky, twisted, mental image of Ghost Hunters episode, “OH! oh, [bleep], what the [bleep] was that? Was that a [bleep] Deer?”

      Adores: 3
  21. 2010 March 24
    sarajean80 permalink

    The Google Ad Gods are workin’ their mojo again. I’m getting ads for coatracks, deer pictures, and something called a ” Hot Fix jewel applicator”.

    That is just freaky.

    Adores: 3
    • 2010 March 24
      TacoMagic permalink

      It’s telling me that as a man over 30 (at the ripe age of 28) I should use a certain website to get a date.

      Boy, my wife will be pissed.

      Adores: 3
  22. 2010 March 24
    Meredith permalink

    My cousin’s husband took up hunting, and he mounted a HUGE buck head RIGHT OVER THE FRONT DOOR. The three women of the home cried their eyes out as he did. But hey, it’s also a gun rack. So yeah, it’s hooves like this, AND a big pissed off dear face above it. Does look like he’s giving you the Double Duece when you’re leaving.

    “Thanks for coming, F*ckers, don’t let the door hit you on the way out! Enjoy the beautiful world out there, since I’m stuck up on this assholes wall instead of with my wife and little chillens. Thanks for making me look so ‘artistic'”

    Adores: 5
    • 2010 March 24
      TacoMagic permalink

      As a hunter, I never really understood the whole mounting thing.

      For one thing, a deer head really isn’t that neat looking and it completely clashes with my dragon and Mega Man collections.

      Adores: 7
      • 2010 March 24

        Between the dragon and Mega Man collections and the missed mounting concept, it’s a wonder you haven’t had fawns of your own.

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 24
          TacoMagic permalink

          Given that information, it’s kind of a proof against Darwinian selection that I’ve managed to procreate.

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 24

          Yay! So, are they….burritos?

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 March 24
          TacoMagic permalink

          More like those little appetizer tacos you can buy in the 16 pack. You know, the ones that are all greasy and weirdly soft when you reheat them in the microwave.

          EDIT: Come to think of it, we do call the package we make every night with his swaddler the “Baby Burrito.” Well played HHFN, well played indeed.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 March 24

          *nomnomnom*
          What? Oh, sorry, I was just eating this…aw, crap.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 March 24
          TacoMagic permalink

          Ortega taco shells are made from PEOPLE!

          Adores: 3
        • 2010 March 24
          sarajean80 permalink

          Ohh, are we having soylent tacos tonight?

          Adores: 3
      • 2010 March 25
        SilvaNoir permalink

        I have a dragon collection too 🙂

        p.s. hi, I’m back.

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 25
          sarajean80 permalink

          Hi Silva!

          *waves*

          Hope you’re feeling better.

          Adores: 1
    • 2010 March 24
      sarajean80 permalink

      He makes it hold the gun that shot it? That’s just sick.

      Adores: 8
      • 2010 March 24
        Meredith permalink

        Sarajean, until you said that, I had not realized just how hilarious this is.

        “I’m going to stuff you. And once you’re up there, could you hang on to the murder weapon, please?”

        Adores: 5
  23. 2010 March 24
    Cazio permalink

    For me, the most annoying thing is the “Also forgot to mention…” part. People are not reading this ad in real-time. Go back and edit it. Take your time. We do not need to know that you forgot it.

    Adores: 5
  24. 2010 March 24
    Yancy permalink

    This brings to my mind a couple deer exiting from wildlife’s version of a nail salon after having gotten all dolled up for deer prom/deer bridesmaid duty when a couple hunters shoot them.

    Adores: 2
    • 2010 March 24
      sarajean80 permalink

      Or they were “deer of the evening” and this is the work of a deer serial killer.

      Anyone know if the police have been recieving taunting letters written on leaves with berry juice?

      Adores: 4
    • 2010 March 24

      Shame someone hadn’t mentioned this before. *ahem*

      Adores: 1
  25. 2010 March 24

    A gun rack….. a gun rack. I don’t even own *A* gun, let alone many guns that would necessitate an entire rack. What am I gonna do… with a gun rack?

    Adores: 1
    • 2010 March 24
      sarajean80 permalink

      Hang your bandanna collection on it?

      Adores: 2
    • 2010 March 24
      CapnMac permalink

      Besides, if you own enough guns to fill a rack, the responsible thing to do at that point is buy a safe instead.

      [corey]Shed antlers (deer shed antlers after every rutting season) actually make better storage hooks, if only for the fact you can saw them to suit, and leftovers can be used for knife scales and the like. [/corey]

      Adores: 1
    • 2010 March 24

      You are officially Awesome.
      party time, excellent.

      Adores: 0
  26. 2010 March 24
    Astro permalink

    Why, it’s simple, really. Use it to threaten people. Especially those unfortunates suffering from Not.A.Lion disease. Telling them you own a gun rack causes them to assume you also have multiple guns of various types.

    Adores: 1
  27. 2010 March 24
    sarajean80 permalink

    I just noticed that this is listed under “art and craft”. That makes no kinda sense.

    Adores: 3
    • 2010 March 24
      Randomname permalink

      “What Not To Do when trying to craft a beautiful coat hanger”?

      Adores: 0
  28. 2010 March 24
    Hartster permalink

    I’m gonna buy this for my girl. Even though she has a gun and coat rack made out of deer’s feet – it’s called the back of my pickup truck. Unfortunately, said pickup truck doesn’t fit in her bedroom. (It did fit in the living room when we thought of selling the truck on Craigslist.)

    Adores: 2
  29. 2010 March 24
    mudslicker permalink

    It makes as much sense as a Mattel Creepy Crawler’s Thingmaker.

    Adores: 2
    • 2010 March 24
      TacoMagic permalink

      I’ve still got one of those actually.

      Adores: 2
    • 2010 March 24

      Hey. That thing was awesome.

      Adores: 2
    • 2010 March 24
      mudslicker permalink

      Can you believe they used to let children make napalm spiders in that? My brother’s got about 25 burn scars from that thing to this day. It was AWESOME!!!

      Adores: 2
      • 2010 March 24
        sarajean80 permalink

        I wanted one so bad, but Mom always said “No!”. (But more forceful and sometimes with the use of “grown-up words”) Something about “you will hurt yourself” or “You’ll burn the house down”, something like that.
        I short out one little wall outlet and I’m marked for life.

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 24
          TacoMagic permalink

          My parents always told me that if I wanted to play with fire I was to do it outside. It’s a stance I’m holding with my child as well.

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 March 24

          But napalm isn’t ‘technically’ fire, now is it

          Adores: 0
    • 2010 March 24

      I can hear the song now.

      Adores: 0
  30. 2010 March 24
    Yancy permalink

    By the way, if this monstrosity is used as a gun rack, the only gun that would be appropriate to place on this would be this.

    Adores: 1
    • 2010 March 24
      Windrose permalink

      Yancy, wow. It almost makes me WANT the rack, so I can get the rifle. 8)

      Adores: 1
    • 2010 March 24
      B....... permalink

      Beautiful gun. Be sure to “click to enlarge”……..

      Adores: 2
  31. 2010 March 25
    Bianchi Sound permalink

    I just realized they spelled beerdazzled wrong.

    Adores: 3
  32. 2010 March 25
    EclecticBlue permalink

    I’m surprised nobody ran with this one, but….

    Ray, the guy that has the gun!

    Adores: 3
  33. 2010 March 25
    amandawlu permalink

    I can’t decide which is my fav – this hanger or the couch that someone died on (if you don’t recall – http://www.yousuckatcraigslist.com/?p=3006, it’s the second one down). I mean this one has a bedazzled carcass but the couch had a corpse stain/odour. We’re really comparing apples to…a different kind of apples here lol. This piece is touted as art while the couch ad had no qualms about telling you it’s morbid history/characteristics. On the other hand, the couch was still being sold for well more than it’s worth (ie $0) and I think killing 1.25 deers (or maybe one deformed one..which would actually increase its value) was more than $50 in labour let alone the taxidermy costs. Hmmm…the rhinestones really make this special…maybe if the couch came with the dead aunt (bedazzled of course) then it would be a clear winner…..

    Adores: 1
  34. 2010 March 26
    Marilyn permalink

    At least it’s not vagazzled. Although, if it were, it would be perfect for Jennifer Love Hewitt’s boudoir.

    Adores: 0
  35. 2010 March 29

    *climbing back in the chair after falling down laughing* sorry, but the words ‘bedazzled dear’ hit me without warning. anyway, dude’s right here, this thing is VERY unique and hopefully, it’s one of a kind as well. But what’s with the handkerchiefs? Is my daughter supposed to clean her assault rifle with it? and does it have to be bedazzled too, because that would raise some unwanted attention in gay-dear-world. Actually it wouldn’t be so unwanted, because it would not just save some nice flamboyant dears, but also protect us from more of those, err… things.

    Adores: 0
  36. 2010 April 4
    Windrose permalink

    Oh noes! I didn’t punch anybody on this day! The world will probably end now. *hangs head in shame* I should turn in my custome-made brass knuckles and never show my face around here again. *checks to see if anyone looks concerned or interested*

    Adores: 0
  37. 2010 April 6

    My question … why 5 feet? If each deer has 4 feet then were did the extra foot come from? Or is this one foot from each of 5 deer? Maybe two horribly mangled deer with missing feet? Or is this just one hanger from a potentially matching set?! Are there 3 more of these floating around, totaling 20 feet from 5 normal 4-footed deer? But then this couldn’t really be called unique and one of a kind then, could it?

    Adores: 0
  38. 2010 April 7
    Alex permalink

    To me (who is non-American) this sounds like the ad is from Texas. Seriously.

    Adores: 0
  39. 2013 March 24

    I grew up in an all-boy family, so we had five-deer-feet gun racks without bedazzling or multicolored handkerchiefs.

    (Part of the preceding sentence is true.)

    Adores: 1
  40. 2013 March 24
    PhantomBanker permalink

    The five-hoof part of it still scares me. That’s just not your normal deer.

    I wonder if I should tell my neighbor about this one. Every deer season, her son sticks an honest to goodness deer hoof on the antenna of his 1998-ish Jeep Cherokee.*

    *-Sad to say, this is entirely true.

    Adores: 1
  41. 2013 March 24
    DigitalAxis permalink

    My Little Taxidermy Pony

    Adores: 1
  42. 2013 March 24
    Aphid permalink

    You know, nowhere in the ad does it actually say that the deer feet are taxidermied – just painted and bedazzled.

    Adores: 1
  43. 2013 March 24

    I really have nothing to say except, “Kapooya!”

    Adores: 0
  44. 2013 March 25

    Dave, you are Regent of the Baux for weekends. I hope that fits in to your busy schedule! Punchity Punch Punch!

    Good Morning, Deer Friends!

    Adores: 0
  45. 2013 April 9

    The next time I study a weblog, I chance that it doesnt disappoint me as a great deal as this one. I require, I do get it was my option to discover, nonetheless I genuinely idea youd have 1 thing interesting to say. Each and every one I find out is a bunch of buzzing in relation to a touch that you might repair when you werent extremely tiring in the hunt for representing attention. chanel outlet http://www.topchanelbag2013.co.uk/

    Adores: 0

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