YSaC, Vol. 678: The gravy diggers.

2010 May 26

grave bowel , set – $45


white, good condition , come with a bowel, plug and spoon

You know, I’ve been hosting Thanksgiving dinners for about a decade now, and nobody has ever pointed out to me that I should have an electric gravy bowl. [“Electric Gravy Bowl” gets my vote for band name of the day.] I wonder how many of my guests have been sitting at the table thinking to themselves, “How dare she host a Thanksgiving dinner without a blurry electric gravy bowl! The nerve. The horror. Can you pass the garlic mashed potatoes, please?”

And, as always, these things do NOT occur in isolation:

Kelloggs Breakfast set — $10.00 NEW


Very cute set comes with a Tony the Tiger bowel, spoon and sugar bowel and Toucan Sam bowel, spoon and creamer.
Comes with two boxes of cereal but they are old so therefor I wouldn’t suggest eating them.

Everyone knows you don’t EAT vintage cereals! They’re valuable! For those two boxes you could get at least a minty Acura Integra.

Thanks, Anne and Camille!

178 Responses leave one →
  1. 2010 May 26
    Windrose permalink

    *contemplates bowel plug and spoon* *contemplates Toucan Sam bowel and spoon* So the plug goes . . . and then the spoon does. . .and it’s all gravy. Huh.

    Adores: 17
    • 2010 May 26
      sarajean80 permalink

      I’ve done a lot of things with gravy, but that’s not one of them.

      Adores: 5
      • 2010 May 26

        SJ –

        And just what have you done with gravy?

        Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          sarajean80 permalink

          I’m Southern, we use gravy for everything. It’s like the eighth food group, right between “Chocolate” and “Processed Cheese Food”.

          Adores: 9
        • 2010 May 26
          mudslicker permalink

          Paula Deen would add “Butter” to that list y’all.

          Adores: 4
        • 2010 May 26
          sarajean80 permalink

          You can use butter to make gravy.

          It’s like the duck tape of the culinary world.

          Adores: 3
        • 2010 May 26

          Y’all h’ain’t lived ’till ‘yall’s tasted a chicken-fried steak with sausage gravy.

          (I believe one can find such things at IHOP. And if you are ever in the vicinity of Wilmington, NC [the place where I first tasted such a treat] you ought to try the Sawmill Restaurant [specializing in breakfasts and lunches] out by Monkey Junction, near the Tregembo Zoo.)

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 May 26
          LimeLolly permalink

          Astro, I’ve tried it… thankfully, I’ve lived. Just need to get my arteries roto-rootered out now.

          Guess I’m not a true southerner..

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 May 26
          sarajean80 permalink

          Cracker Barrel does a decent version, too. Not like Mama’s, but good.

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 May 26
          mudslicker permalink

          Astro: You just made those places up, didn’t you? (The Zoo was a nice touch)

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          sarajean80 permalink

          Actually…

          http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monkey_Junction,_North_Carolina

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 May 26
          WendyBear permalink

          The area between Kentucky and Yellowstone when driving across the US is also prime country for chicken fried steak with gravy. Actually, they advertise the chicken fried steak (also sometimes called country fried steak) with gravy and pie.

          Word of warning: Don’t ever try to order anything else on the menu. A salad is a sad, sad thing in that part of the country. Eat the meat with gravy and pie. And like it. You won’t find better, even in the south (I’m from the south).

          For some reason, my mom always called the fried steak with gravy “cubed steak.” She also cut it up after cooking it and mixed in with a HUGE bowl of gravy. This was then served with homemade biscuits. It was awesome, but my cholesterol levels are just now recovering.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 May 26
          sarajean80 permalink

          We had that for dinner the other night. I think the meat chunks were originally pork chops, it can be hard to tell after they’ve been dipped in flour, pan-fried, and smothered in gravy.

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 May 26

          They’re all real. My great aunt owns a house there. The Tregembo Animal Park has a White Not.A.Lion., in fact. And a real estate company.

          I even found a link to a blog post about ’em:
          http://www.thisblogsmellsfunny.com/2007/10/tote-em-in-zoo-tregembo-animal-park.html

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 May 26

          Sawmill Restaurant for Breakfast, and Rucker John’s for Dinner.

          Adores: 1
  2. 2010 May 26
    TacoMagic permalink

    Yes, we have a grave bowel that we know you’ll be dying to dump out. And we know that you’ll dig this fabulously functional fecal funset as well! These killer items are just flowing over with value. You’ll have a ghost of a good time rolling in our merchandise!

    What?

    Adores: 6
    • 2010 May 26
      sarajean80 permalink

      Seems a little corny to me, not to mention in bad taste.

      The situation just seems ripe with innuendo.

      Adores: 2
      • 2010 May 26
        TacoMagic permalink

        Don’t worry, this too shall pass.

        Adores: 6
        • 2010 May 26
          mudslicker permalink

          Corn? That always passes unscathed.

          Adores: 3
        • 2010 May 26
          sarajean80 permalink

          So do dimes and they are easier to find than pennies afterwards.

          Adores: 4
        • 2010 May 26

          Many seeds make it through intact. Sometimes, if you’re lucky, you will find tomato plants on the edge of a sludge pond just ripe for the picking. πŸ™‚

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 May 26
          TacoMagic permalink

          [corey]
          Well, technically that’s the point of fruit. An animal eats the fruit and excretes the seeds out with a nice pile of manure to give the seed a good start in a new location.

          Moral of the story: Always poop outside.
          [/corey]

          Adores: 11
        • 2010 May 26
          sarajean80 permalink

          Note to self – Never take any tomatoes Archie offers you.

          Adores: 4
        • 2010 May 26

          I have children, SJ. I can disguise ANY food. Muahahahaha!

          Adores: 3
        • 2010 May 26
          TacoMagic permalink

          Since plants live on manure does that implicitly mean that the Create Food spell can create a pile of poop?

          Adores: 2
    • 2010 May 26
      WendyBear permalink

      Eww. Now I am imagining farts from the grave. Talk about a stench… I mean, some farts from the living smell like something crawled up their asses and died… what about a fart from the living dead?

      I may be ill.

      Adores: 5
  3. 2010 May 26
    MandaB permalink

    So many bowels and spoons for sale. People everywhere are selling them. I guess you could call it a movement.

    Adores: 32
    • 2010 May 26
      Windrose permalink

      My spoon is too big!

      Adores: 4
      • 2010 May 26
        TacoMagic permalink

        Put a cork in it.

        Adores: 1
      • 2010 May 26
        MandaB permalink

        As Lola noted yesterday, there’s vintage Crisco for that.

        Adores: 3
  4. 2010 May 26
    Mindfield permalink

    I had a grave bowel once. A little Immodium cleared that right up.

    Adores: 13
    • 2010 May 26
      LimeLolly permalink

      But was it something you ate? πŸ™‚

      Adores: 4
      • 2010 May 27
        Mindfield permalink

        Bad cereal, I think. It tasted oddly of meat. Not even a healthy dumping from the the sugar bowel made it taste better.

        Adores: 0
  5. 2010 May 26
    mudslicker permalink

    Tony. Not. A. Lion bowel set. This would be a great addition to that collection of vintage cereals!

    Adores: 0
    • 2010 May 26
      sarajean80 permalink

      I guess if you actually eat the vintage cereals, you’ll need that replacement bowel.

      Adores: 8
      • 2010 May 26
        mudslicker permalink

        Yes. I find it an oxymoron that the cereal bowel set is NEW yet the two boxes of cereal are so “old therefor [sic]I wouldn’t suggest eating them”. It’s like when birds and tigers start living together…human sacrifice….mass hysteria! I hate it when my froot gets looped and my intestines get tangled.

        Adores: 3
  6. 2010 May 26
    sarajean80 permalink

    Just where are they suggesting I stick that plug? ‘Cause I have a couple of suggestions about where they can put it.

    I’ll even let it warm up first.

    That has to be the first Rule 34 breakfast set I’ve ever seen. Kudos to Sparky for ruining yet another beloved childhood marketing icon!

    Adores: 5
  7. 2010 May 26
    lost_compass permalink

    1 insert spoon
    2 insert plug
    3 bowel empties automatically
    4 when you hear Snap, Crackle and Pop – that means it’s working
    5 beware of electrectal shock

    Adores: 10
    • 2010 May 26
      mudslicker permalink

      I think the bowel merely heats up. Sort of like after a night of eating jalapeno peppers. Emptying requires forethought.

      Adores: 1
      • 2010 May 26
        TacoMagic permalink

        With a long cord as a tripping hazard I think controlling this bowel would be rather complicated.

        Plus it looks like it’s got a crack, so there may be some seepage.

        Adores: 2
        • 2010 May 26
          sarajean80 permalink

          So it should come with a warning, “May cause au jus leakage”?

          Adores: 9
        • 2010 May 26

          Taco – Aren’t all bowels supposed to have a crack attached?

          *I’ll send myself to the corner for that

          Adores: 6
  8. 2010 May 26
    mudslicker permalink

    Joking aside, does anyone else feel that a plug-in gravy boat would be a major pain in the ass at the Holiday dining room table? Grandpa and drunk Uncle George would be tripping over the cord and spilling hot gravy all over the cranberry sauce. Dad would run the risk of carving the gravy cord with the Oster electric knife when he’s yelling at mom to get the yams out and not paying attention to what he’s doing [as usual]. $45 for priceless family memories. Get everyone naked and the fun is doubled!

    Kodak moments….

    Adores: 4
    • 2010 May 26
      sarajean80 permalink

      While I’ve not yet “enjoyed” a naked Thanksgiving, I agree that it would be a hassle. It’s one of those ideas that sounds good in your head but have no useful application in the real world. Like a solar powered flashlight.

      Given the erratic placement of electrical outlets in my parents’ house and my dad’s penchant for “fixing” things, I can just invision the spiderweb of extension cords that would be erected for this thing. Add small children, pets, and copious amounts of alcohol and someone’s taking an ambulance ride.

      (OT, but speaking of ambulance rides, My nephew got one last night courtesy of the bike ramp he and his friends built. He’s on a morphine drip this morning and going into surgery to have a rod inserted to fix the extra bend in his arm.)

      Adores: 3
      • 2010 May 26
        LimeLolly permalink

        Ambulance rides… I remember those days.

        Adores: 0
      • 2010 May 26
        TacoMagic permalink

        But did the ramp work?

        Adores: 4
        • 2010 May 26
          sarajean80 permalink

          It had a short but spectacular career. It has been retired to the woodpile now.

          I saw it and am both impressed and dismayed that they built the thing. I think they used duck tape to hold most of it together.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          TacoMagic permalink

          That’s just lazy… or maybe they couldn’t find the power tools.

          My cousin and I always knew where to find power tools. It’s amazing we only caused 4 hospital visits in our illustrious career of random dangerous object construction.

          1 broken arm, 1 nail through foot, 1 concussion, and 1 sprained ankle. Ahh youth.

          Note: We’re both engineers now, go figure.

          Adores: 3
        • 2010 May 26
          sarajean80 permalink

          My brother in law keeps the power tools locked up in the garage for that very reason, since he was once a young’n prone to dangerous activities.

          (All I ever did was cause a few blown fuses, some minor electrocutions, assorted cuts and burns, and a crushed toe.(Lesson learned – Bricks are heavier than they look.))

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          TacoMagic permalink

          Our fathers had a different policy:

          “They’re going to build dangerous stuff anyway, at least let them have the tools and knowhow to build it correctly. It’s slightly less dangerous to have a well built object of destruction than it is to have a ram-shackled one.”

          Granted they did keep their TIG welders locked up. I guess even they had to limit our creativity beyond a certain point. Which was a shame because we SO could have used a welder for our ballista.

          Adores: 3
        • 2010 May 26
          sarajean80 permalink

          He’s fine with him building dangerous stuff(as witnessed by the Crossbow Fiasco of ’04), as long as he gets to help and make sure he doesn’t end up severing a limb in the process.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26

          What’s wrong with duct tape? The Mythbusters built a working bridge out of it…

          oh wait, they tried it at a home, didn’t they?

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          sarajean80 permalink

          Middle of the street, actually.(Not much traffic.)
          Asphalt is not a very forgiving landing pad.

          Adores: 0
      • 2010 May 26
        Grampdaddy permalink

        Reminds me of a phone call I once received:

        Eldest son: “Dad, (youngest daughter) broke her arm.”

        Me: “She probably just sprained it – why do you think it is broken?”

        Eldest son: “Well, you might be right, but her elbow is going the right way, and her arm is going the other – what’a ya think?”

        End of phone call….

        SJ, hope he is doing ok and the surgery goes well.

        Adores: 3
        • 2010 May 26
          TacoMagic permalink

          When I was 10 I broke my arm trying to do a backflip off the monkey bars. I made it 3/4 of the way over before breaking my fall with an iron crossbar.

          Lesson learned:
          Iron > Bone.

          Adores: 4
        • 2010 May 26
          sarajean80 permalink

          Thanks, GD. From what my sister tells me it was a bad break but they have him feeling no pain right now. Hopefully I’ll be able to see him this afternoon after they get done putting Humpty-Dumpty back together again.

          TM – He’s thirteen and old enough to know better, but young enough to do it anyway. And he wasn’t wearing a helmet or pads, so he’s lucky all he broke was his arm.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          TacoMagic permalink

          Having your arm in a cast for 3 months teaches a very important lesson:

          When doing something stupid wear some safety gear.

          Adores: 3
        • 2010 May 26
          Windrose permalink

          I am amazed and delighted my son is going to graduate high school next month with a perfect record of no broken bones, and only a sprained thumb in 17 years. He used to speculate as a child what it felt like to jump off a roof, and would throw himself off of swings at their highest point. Damaged a perfectly good pair of glasses that way. At one point when we were looking for a new house to rent, we looked at one that was two-story, and every single room on the second floor had a balcony. Understandably, we looked elsewhere.

          SJ, hope your nephew gets some of those good drugs to get him through the recovery process.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          Grampdaddy permalink

          Taco – that’s cool about the backflip. I had two older brothers when I was growing up, and we had a very LARGE swingset – like 15 feet tall and made out of 3 inch boiler pipe (Dad wanted to be sure it would hold up). My brother convinced me that he could push me high enough on the swing that I could do a complete circle around. Being five, and adoring said older brother, I believed him.

          He was almost right – managed to get me all the way vertical above the crossbar and then gravity took over. I met the crossbar, then fell the rest of the way to the ground. At that point the swing seat (a hunk of 2×8) decided it would fall also and smacked me in the head. When I came to, my brother was inside reading….

          Dear Dad’s comment, “Geez, how could you be so stupid?” – to me. My brother got the “Whatever were you thinking?”

          This was the same brother that got me shot at with rock salt while helping him “borrow” apples from the orchard down the road – boy we had a good time growing up!

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 May 26
          MandaB permalink

          I bet you’d pay huge sums of money to fall off that swingset again, GD. πŸ™‚ I know I would.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          sarajean80 permalink

          Update: Yay, he’s going home today! They trussed him up with fancy hardware and are sending him home with bucketloads of that good hospital dope. My sister says he’s grumpy, sore, and not talking much, but he is a teenager so that’s almost normal.

          Adores: 3
      • 2010 May 26
        mudslicker permalink

        Wasn’t there a YSaC ad advertising a dining room/porker table and naked people? I know I didn’t dream that.

        Here: http://www.yousuckatcraigslist.com/?p=3483

        Victory!

        Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          Lola permalink

          My favorite story involved a line uttered by the father of a couple of my schoolmates … they discovered they could make the junker farm car do Dukes of Hazzard jumps from one side of the road to the other! Everyone was fine, but the road wasn’t their property … and when they got back to their house, their dad said, “Look what followed the boys home, honey! The state patrol!”

          Adores: 0
      • 2010 May 26
        MandaB permalink

        SJ I hope the surgery goes well for him. My niece did the same thing a few years back (while her family was on vacation – nothing says ruined trip like surgery and a return trip in the car while on heavy pain meds) and she had a good recovery….until she cut the tips off 2 of her fingers about 10 months later. Lawnmower incident. Don’t ask. Just keep the nephew away from the lawnmower.

        Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          sarajean80 permalink

          Given his general dislike of manual labor, that probably won’t be a problem.

          I am curious to see if he will find a way to play video games while wearing a cast.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26

          Trust me, there’s always a way.

          Adores: 3
    • 2010 May 26
      CapnMac permalink

      Yes. Image of electrical gravy boat (at any holiday meal) horrifying to me.
      Trip/pull hazard; too many people crammed into an unfamiliar venue; stress of being nice to people who are (or should be) strangers–just a lovely combo.

      That, and gravy is tough sledding. Gravy needs to be thickened, so it needs some sort of roux to do so. But, that thickener is finicky. You get one shot, boil it again after that, and it ruins. There’s physics behind gravy too. It needs to be thinnier on the stove than in the boat, as it will thicken as it cools. A good gravy is very zen; it either is or is not.

      Using a heating element in a bowl is a sign of desperation. And desparate gravy it will be, too, trying to both be too thick and too thin. With nice wet “slops” from where the spoon dribbled, too. One loose wire and it’s electrified , oh my.

      Wow, and this all ties into things I have seen on my ride-alongs. The electric carving knife with the frayed cord, it was giving every user a small electric shock. No one noticed until the Uncle with the pacemaker picked it up.

      Adores: 8
      • 2010 May 26
        mudslicker permalink

        Desperate Gravy? Disparate Gravy? Would want to avoid that at all costs…although they sound like a bangin’ band.

        Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          CapnMac permalink

          LoL
          For some reason, “Au jus du jour” popped into my head, and I’m stuck with a zydeco group of Justin Wilson portrayers in my head . . .
          Aiaiaiaieieieie!

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          MandaB permalink

          Capn I love Au Jus du Jour. Wasn’t their big hit “Laissez Les Bon Temps Roux Les”??? πŸ˜€

          Adores: 4
      • 2010 May 26
        sarajean80 permalink

        The Zen of Gravy, by Cap’n Mac.

        There’s a book I would buy, if only to give it to my sister. She either burns her roux or decides to skip that part and just dump raw flour into the drippings, which is a good way to make meat-flavored glue. She still calls me every time she makes gravy so I can lead her through the process over the phone. (This is the same woman I have had the “Baking Soda and Baking Powder are NOT the same thing” discussion with too many times to count. Thank goodness her husband does most of the cooking.)

        Adores: 2
        • 2010 May 26
          TacoMagic permalink

          It’s kind of the same thing at the Taco house, or at least it used to be. I used to do the majority of the cooking back when I worked nights and had time after I got up but before the wife got home.

          Luckily TacoMa’am is a good student and has picked up an immense amount of kitchen knowledge since our dating days (truly, she had mac’n cheese and Hamburger Helper as her skillset… and that was it). Which is fortunate, since TacoMagic got a new job and usually doesn’t have time/energy to cook during the week anymore. It’s still my job during the weekend, but that’s mostly because I LOVE to cook and insist that it’s my turn.

          However, gravy is still a blind spot for the Tma’am. I’ve tried to caution her that if gravy isn’t turning out quite right, you CAN add a small spoonful of cornflour to help the thickening process, BUT patience is key sometimes as you need to give the flour some time to do its thing. This has been interpreted as “If it’s not thickening fast enough adding up to a half cup of cornflour is totally called for.” Mmm gravy in block form.

          Damn, now I want turkey gravy for dinner.

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 May 26
          Artsy Computer Geek permalink

          My sister added flour to cake frosting to make it thicker. This makes very good concrete, when in a bind.

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 May 26
          Catherine permalink

          Down here in Louisiana you can buy canned dark roux. Maybe that would help?

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          sarajean80 permalink

          I don’t know, how heavy is the can and how many times would I have to hit her with it to make her stop cooking?

          Adores: 6
      • 2010 May 26

        (Erma Bombeck corey) I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage. (end corey)

        So true, at the Eyebrow home. Especially sausage gravy and bisquits.

        Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          CapnMac permalink

          Artsy, will it make a four-foot frosting Moai, though?

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          CapnMac permalink

          [cue REM]I have seen a Sign, an Omen and/or Portent of the End Times: The Albertson’s down the street sells dehydrated (just add water) roux.

          Lessee, ingredients in roux, equal parts flour and fat; stir slowly over low heat. That can be improved by dehydration and reconstitution? Bry that vile concoction will burn (or break) as fast and readily as a proper roux, and you get a whole bunch of chemical in the “instant” mix.

          Oh well, the remake of Karate Kid will have no karate; Pat Morita’s role by Jackie Chan; martial art will be Kung Fu–seemed to have skipped the blonde LA bullies, too. Only curious (to me) thing is that “the kid” looks just like the Huey Freeman character on Boondocks.

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 May 26
          LimeLolly permalink

          I’ve always thought that using instant gravy mixes or rouxs was akin to shaving a cement block and adding water… same taste anyway. Maybe I’m wrong, but I don’t lay claims to being a chef.

          There is no Karate Kid without Ralph Macchio and Pat Morita… nuff said.

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 May 26
          CapnMac permalink

          Well, “instant” gravy right up there with “wine based” margaritas.
          Same sort of punishment for using either and expeting better.

          Or, peanut butter in individual-wrapped “slices” (you still have to get a knife out for the jelly, and it’s awful PB).

          Now, arguments of pan gravy versus canned/made can become technical questions about the kitchen, not the product.
          If you have a diner, and you make enough breakfast, you have the makings for sausage gravy.
          If you are deep-frying your CFS, then the made gravy is better than the canned.
          If you use a cast-iron pan on the griddle for CFS, then canned can mean faster service–you need a good sales volume of CFS to make pan gravy from the cast iron.

          At home? You have a pan of perfectly good fond? Not making pan gravy is a bit like not making gravy after sausage. But, I’m biased in this, I know.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          sarajean80 permalink

          Slices of peanut butter?

          That’s just wrong on so many levels.

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 May 26
          Artsy Computer Geek permalink

          Gravy is so easy to make — it just blows my mind that people buy it in a jar, can, or package. My 11 year old can make good gravy.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          Jen permalink

          I always find eleven year olds make slightly watery gravy. I much prefer two or three year old gravy. Old enough to give a bit of a bite, but much fresher. Smaller portions, too, which makes them easier to fit in the pot.

          What?

          Adores: 11
        • 2010 May 27
          CapnMac permalink

          Do many Kiwi houses use frosting for mortar?

          Adores: 0
      • 2010 May 26
        WendyBear permalink

        [Homer Simpson]

        oooohhhhuuuuunnnnggghhh Electriiiiffffiiiied grrrrraaaaaavvvvvyyyyyyy!

        [/Homer]

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 May 26
          CapnMac permalink

          Yeah, usually in the refrigerator case with the things that don’t neatly “classify”; so it will be near the holistic or “supermarket vegan” products. (It’s by the texas toast in my store.)

          Looks like the PPCF slices, just in a Jif-like brown color.

          I’ve never been tough enough to try any, even in the face of major hurricanes coming nearby. Or, maybe it’s memories of both K-Ration & MRE peanut butter . . .

          Adores: 1
    • 2010 May 26

      My favorite Thanksgiving story from when I was a child involves a cord. We were living in this place that for whatever reason had plenum (false ceiling panels) in the kitchen. A few of the panels were missing. My mother had just got this fancy electrical cookie press/icing shooter/cheese shooter thing. She decided to christian it by making some fancy cheese designs on crackers. She made about 3/4 of a tray when the phone rang. She set the press/shooter thing on the tray that was on our table and walked around the table to answer the phone. I guess whomever she was talking to (I never asked) distracted her a bit and when she came back, she tripped over the cord for the shooter. The shooter thing hit the tray really hard and the little cheese crackers went flying. Some of them stuck to the plenum and some went in where panels were missing. What made this even funnier (for me) is that we had 7 foot ceilings, my mom was 5 foot even, and we had no ladder.

      Adores: 7
      • 2010 May 26

        Kelli, your speeling slip may beome my favorite Of.All.Time. Perhaps the cheese shooter thing would have rather been a Buddhist. I know all my kitchen gadgets tend to be very zen in their daily life.

        Except the knives. They always have a hidden agenda.

        Adores: 2
        • 2010 May 26

          We were going to give the cheese shooter a bris until we saw it rolling around with the ham. Then we knew it just wouldn’t be Kosher.

          Adores: 6
        • 2010 May 26

          (Splutter) annnnd there went my green tea! Please tell me you didn’t then try to baptize it by immersion? That would have shocked the poor thing.*

          *cheesy, I know

          What?

          Adores: 5
  9. 2010 May 26
    TacoMagic permalink

    Extree! Extree!

    Pontificating posters put ponderous poo packages on Craigslist!

    Botched bowls become bowel batches because of brash blockheads!

    Adores: 0
    • 2010 May 26
      LimeLolly permalink

      That’s not in the Berenstein Bears ‘B’ book.

      Adores: 0
      • 2010 May 26
        sarajean80 permalink

        I thought it was “Berenstain Bears”.

        Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          LimeLolly permalink

          It is… but it’s so hard to get a stain out without presoaking..

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          sarajean80 permalink

          I’ve got some bleach on the stove if you need it.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          LimeLolly permalink

          I plan on using some red wine, or a margarita actually. Yeah, it’s early in the week.. but so the heck what. That’s my presoaking for the weekend!

          Adores: 1
  10. 2010 May 26
    Grampdaddy permalink

    Having had the occasion to bury a number of relatives, I find the notion of a “grave bowel heater” an ‘inter-resting’ idea. I don’t know of anyone who enjoys cold and damp – simply insert the heater per directions, select the desire temperature and, voila, cozy eternity.

    A couple of considerations: Does the electrical supply need to be run in conduit, or can you use direct burial cable? Is a GFCI needed to protect against leakage in shorts?

    Not sure, and don’t want to know – what is the spoon for?

    Adores: 3
    • 2010 May 26
      sarajean80 permalink

      It does sort of vaguely resemble an athletic supporter with a long handle, so…

      I have suddenly lost all desire for gravy in any form.

      Adores: 0
      • 2010 May 26
        TacoMagic permalink

        Lumpy gravy resembles something that isn’t hot chocolate.

        Adores: 0
    • 2010 May 26
      CapnMac permalink

      There’s actually a great deal of debate among electricians online as to how to interpet the NEC on “wet locations” especially when dealing with ground-contact or buried connections.

      Adores: 0
  11. 2010 May 26
    MandaB permalink

    The sellers of the grave bowel are dying for someone to relieve them of it. Then they’ll be disemboweled.

    Adores: 14
    • 2010 May 26
      CapnMac permalink

      And only a craigslister could screw up seppuku.

      Adores: 2
  12. 2010 May 26
    LimeLolly permalink

    My first thought was ‘ZOMG. It’s for a zombie!’, but I couldn’t quite figure how such a creature would use a plug and a spoon. Well… actually, I could, but it’s too early in the morning to gross myself out.

    Adores: 2
    • 2010 May 26
      Grampdaddy permalink

      Alert! – Alert!
      ZOMB….

      Adores: 0
      • 2010 May 26
        TacoMagic permalink

        *Taco draws the dreaded Grave Bowel to use against the undead hoard*

        *Splort, Glrrrpt, Blort, Frblrblblbl, Geplork*

        Haha, you don’t stand a chance now! I’ll kill every zomb-

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 May 26
          Windrose permalink

          We’re going to need another Taco!

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          CapnMac permalink

          Teach him to not reach for the Auxillary Damage Table fir…

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          MandaB permalink

          Silly Taco! Why didn’t he just use the flashli

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 May 26

          Because it was solar powered, and everyone knows zmobies only come out at niAaaaarrrrrrggghhh

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          Artsy Computer Geek permalink

          Look in the Taco Box — there may be another one.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26

          But we voided the warranty on all those…

          Adores: 0
    • 2010 May 26

      Even Zombies enjoy a hot meal every now and then.

      Adores: 1
      • 2010 May 26
        sarajean80 permalink

        And 98.6 degrees is not hot enough for them?

        Damn picky eaters.

        *(Shakes cane at the undead)*

        Adores: 5
        • 2010 May 26
          CapnMac permalink

          Had to read that three times to get “cane” and not “cans” . . .

          Adores: 2
        • 2010 May 26
          sarajean80 permalink

          I have foundation garments to fix that problem.

          Adores: 6
  13. 2010 May 26
    Grampdaddy permalink

    re: #2 – I like our (YSaC) not.a.lion mug MUCH more….

    Adores: 2
  14. 2010 May 26
    Lola permalink

    Grave bowel? Why so serious?

    I’ll get me coat and come back when my snark seems properly aligned …

    Adores: 2
    • 2010 May 26
      LimeLolly permalink

      According to your horoscope, your snark will be in alignment after exactly 13 days, and a chiropractic visit and purchase of not.a.lion slippers has occurred. That may or may not require caramel sauce.

      Adores: 2
      • 2010 May 26
        sarajean80 permalink

        Ooh, the grave bowel would be perfect for warming caramel sauce!

        Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26

          So in addition to Archie’s tomatos, we need to be weary of any warm caramel offered by Sarajean.

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 May 26
          sarajean80 permalink

          Would you rather I offered you a grave bowel filled with hot fudge?

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          CapnMac permalink

          Hot Fudge in casing gives a different meaning to Fudge pudding.

          Hmmm, find Andy Bourdain and see if anyone has offered him a hickory-smoked chocolate sausage . . .

          Adores: 1
  15. 2010 May 26
    CapnMac permalink

    Is this like IBS, this Grave Bowel Syndrome? Will we need a ribbon? What color will it be?

    Wait, did Sparkie mean Grave Bowel Sett, and this is an ancient Egyptian funerary item?

    Adores: 3
    • 2010 May 26
      TacoMagic permalink

      And my large bowel for a little grave,
      A little little grave, an obscure grave;
      Or I’ll be irregular on the king’s throne,
      Some use of common throne, where subjects’ bowel
      May hourly grunt over their sovereign’s head;
      For through my bowel they tread now whilst I grunt;
      And flushed once, why not upon my head?

      Adores: 4
    • 2010 May 26
      Lola permalink

      Canopic jars! Now they make sense.
      Except for the electrical part … hmm. I knew ancient Egyptian technology was good, but they did not discover/invent wall sockets.

      Adores: 3
      • 2010 May 26
        mudslicker permalink

        No, those didn’t come along until much later when Sockretes invented them for the Greeks.

        Adores: 4
        • 2010 May 26
          Jen permalink

          I thought it was the Chinese! They invent everything… except glass.

          Oh, and I believe it’s pronounced “so-cray-ts”.

          Adores: 0
      • 2010 May 26

        I thought it was the Baghdad-ese?

        Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          CapnMac permalink

          You are being too literal. No real evidence the Egyptians had a use for the Babylonian battery. Even if it was called the Temple of Luxor.

          Adores: 2
  16. 2010 May 26
    TacoMagic permalink

    I just got a very interesting fortune cookie:

    You are capable, competent, creative, careful. Prove it.

    Is it me, or is this fortune read:

    “You are capable, competent, creative, careful?” Prove it.

    I gave this fortune the finger.

    Adores: 2
    • 2010 May 26
      sarajean80 permalink

      Oh, man – you had your manhood questioned by a dessert? That’s harsh.

      Adores: 5
    • 2010 May 26
      CapnMac permalink

      I should have had Chinese–no wonder my day is sideways!

      Adores: 0
    • 2010 May 26
      frigglesnitz permalink

      Chinese fortunes are to have “in bed” added to the end of them when read aloud…so You are capable, competent, creative, careful. Prove it in bed.
      Of course, in my family, we add “on horseback” instead when little ears are listening. So you could prove it on horseback, or in bed.

      Really, your choice.

      Adores: 1
      • 2010 May 26

        Makes no difference which is which if you’re Catherine the Great a horse.

        Just sayin’.

        Adores: 6
  17. 2010 May 26
    Camille permalink

    I am so pleased to finally have a submission deemed worthy by the Llamanun!

    Adores: 1
  18. 2010 May 26
    Pink Coat permalink

    How come no-one has commented on the use of ‘bowels’ instead of bowls to describe their product?!! Such a disgusting typo!

    Adores: 1
    • 2010 May 26
      mudslicker permalink

      Wow!

      Adores: 0
      • 2010 May 26
        LimeLolly permalink

        TP cruiser to the rescue. We got soft, extra soft, quilted, one, two or three-ply, regular, strong, extra-strong, semi-absorbent, max-absorbent, and some sears catalogs. Whatsyerpleasure?

        *edit- would have been funnier if I’d replied under the right button — see Taco’s post*

        Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          mudslicker permalink

          Gimme the one with that annoying bear family.

          Adores: 0
      • 2010 May 26
        sarajean80 permalink

        I’m gonna go get the Sarcasm Stick out of the shed.

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 May 26
          LimeLolly permalink

          Geez SJ, vacation is supposed to relax a person. Whut happened on yours? Why you gotta go whack at mudslicker?

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          sarajean80 permalink

          Not mudsy, I love mudsy, but this “pink” person. I forgot Mr Vicodin when I went to watch my nieces last night after The Incident, so I’m a bit grumpy.

          No Vicodin + sleeping on a lumpy couch that smells like dogs does not equal a happy Sara Jean.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          mudslicker permalink

          Hehe… Pink Coat was totally looking to get beat with the Snarkcasm Stick.

          Adores: 0
      • 2010 May 26

        Oh goodie, we’re playing the Oblivious Game! It’s been awhile since we had a good round of it on YSaC. Let’s see, now. Pink has thrown the opening gambit (and a mighty good one at that *internet high five*)and mudsy countered with her simple but masterful World of Warcraft reference. So, the question is . . . who’s going to move us to the next level?

        Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          sarajean80 permalink

          I don’t have enough XP to level up. πŸ™

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26

          Considering the subject matter, should I have asked “Who’s going to level us with the next movement?”

          *borrows Lola’s coat and heads for the door

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 May 26

          But borrow implies that you plan to return it…

          Adores: 0
    • 2010 May 26
      TacoMagic permalink

      We like to be subtle. Dumping it all out there is a little too big a job to just push out onto the comments.

      Adores: 2
      • 2010 May 26
        mudslicker permalink

        I sort of like leaving the dumping until the end of the day.

        Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          sarajean80 permalink

          But then you’re in a mad rush to finish, trying to squeeze out every last drop.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          mudslicker permalink

          yes…and i have this urge to just say bowel…bowel…bowel….bowel over and over again because today is Disgusting Typo Wednesday and I’m so hoping there’s cake!

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26
          MandaB permalink

          I realize it is apropos of nothing but I can’t fight the urge to throw in a random “Rectum? It darn near killed ’em!”

          Just, you know, because…

          Adores: 6
        • 2010 May 26
          LimeLolly permalink

          Oooo… I had cake. Going away party for some retirees at work… I don’t know these people real well, but I wanted a piece of cake.
          I’m going to miss them, really. But, I’ll miss the cake more.

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 May 26
          CapnMac permalink

          Well, I know my cat says “bowel!” every so often. I’ve not figured out why.
          Seems to happen after the food bowl has been licked clean, and the mat checked for crumbs.
          So, it’s either “I Want More!” or “Hey! That Was Good–What’s Here to Tear UP!?”

          Adores: 0
    • 2010 May 26
      MandaB permalink

      File this one under “missed connections”.

      And here’s your sign.

      Adores: 0
  19. 2010 May 26

    Please say a little prayer for my snark. Its been broken. I can’t even make a poop joke, and I didn’t chuckle when I saw someone get hit in the nerts.

    Adores: 2
    • 2010 May 26
      frigglesnitz permalink

      “Oh, Llama-Nun, we pray to thee that thee can intercede of behalf of Steve-O and his broken snark. We beseech thee, the Wholiest of Wholey Llamas, that thee may restore his poopie humour to full strength, and place a smile on his lips and a guffah in his mouth when a nert-hit occurs. Ottaman.”

      Adores: 4
  20. 2010 May 26
    Steven permalink

    1st thought: Grave Bowel sounds like a sex toy for necrophiliacs with an anal fetish.

    2nd thought: Oh god! WTF is wrong with me?

    3rd thought: Why am I surprised? The only [relevant] thing wrong with me is that I’m a sick bastard, but I knew that because I come up with stuff like this 5-10 times a day.

    4th thought: I wonder if necrophiliacs masturbate to zombie films.

    My thoughts just went downhill from there.

    Also, I’d like to imagine that the poster thinks that the cereal mascot is a lion named Tony The Tiger, so that this can also be a Not.A.Lion. post.

    Adores: 6
    • 2010 May 26

      Now you’ve got my eye twitching.

      Adores: 0
    • 2010 May 27
      sarajean80 permalink

      Wow.

      It’s like looking into my own brain.

      Adores: 0
      • 2010 May 27
        TacoMagic permalink

        Wow.

        It’s like looking into Sarajean’s brain.

        Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 27
          mudslicker permalink

          Wow.

          It’s like looking into Brian’s sarajean.

          Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 27
          TacoMagic permalink

          Eww Mudsy, that sounds more than vaguely gynecological.

          Adores: 0
  21. 2010 May 26
    Luna Dragon permalink

    Hey, I have the sheet set in the first picture! The moon and stars sheets… they’re flannel. I wonder if the person would be willing to part with the sheets and not the “grave bowel.”

    Adores: 0
  22. 2010 May 26

    Mmmm…tiger bowels. And a celebrity tiger at that.

    Adores: 0
  23. 2010 May 26
    Windrose permalink

    Archie’s in the box! Archie’s in the box! I get to punch Archie! I get to punch Archie!

    Adores: 0
    • 2010 May 26

      Wow, what a week! Got an A on my dreaded History final AND my first Don’t Suck punch. Wheeeee! Manhattans for everybody! (Don’t worry, SJ, there are no tomatoes in them.)

      Adores: 1
      • 2010 May 26

        This isn’t your first — I’m SURE I’ve put you in the box before!

        Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 26

          Oh my gosh, really? Well then, thank you, gracious llama-nun. I can only plead ignorance due to absence from YSaC while traveling or studying.

          P. S. Manhattans for everybody are still in order, I hope?

          Adores: 0
      • 2010 May 26
        Windrose permalink

        I’ll take Manhattan! Punchity Punch Punch. I agree with drmk, you have been in the box before, and it wasn’t that long ago. I am just a bit behind on my record-keeping (sigh) but I will have the exact date and quote before too long.

        G’Night, Monkey Junction!

        Adores: 0
        • 2010 May 27

          Thanks Windrose! Here’s an extra cherry *plunk* for your bedtime cocktail. Be sure to wrap yourself up in a worm quilt and sleep tight!

          Adores: 1
  24. 2010 May 27
    tigprincess permalink

    Why the out of focus photo, sparky 1? If I’m going to buy a grave bowel set I sure as hell want to know what one looks like … after all it might not be quite the birthday present I had in mind for my ex. How many volts does it take? Does it come with instructions?

    Adores: 1
  25. 2010 May 27
    Jinx permalink

    This will go GREAT with the soap terrains I found on eBay!

    Adores: 0
  26. 2010 May 30
    jenn permalink

    did anyone else notice that it says BOWEL not BOWL?? A Bowel, with spoon and plus?? I don’t know about you, but my BOWELS are fine and do not require a spoon or a plug.

    Adores: 0
  27. 2010 May 30
    jenn permalink

    opps meant Plug, see it is that easy I guess to misspell on here!!!!

    Adores: 0
  28. 2010 May 31
    wayne k. permalink

    igor turns to young doctor fronkenshteen and comments on their excavation of a dead body in the middle of the night, ‘could be worse, could be raining’ he says as they stand with their excavation spoons in the opened grave. immediately the sky clouds and it starts raining heavily as they continue their excavation in order to find the last piece required to complete the monster, his bowel. to their delight as they remove the cover, there is also interred with the deceased a neck plug and cable. the need for lightning and kites is removed on one swell foop!

    ah, sweet mysteries of life….

    Adores: 0

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