YSaC, Vol. 1447: My anaconda just don’t want none.

2013 February 12

raper


I am a raper am traying to do big things if anyone out there who can helpme please email to xxxxxxxxxxcto_cto@xxxxx.com

Oooh, I think I know this one:

I like big things and I cannot lie
Those other rapers can’t deny
When a thing walks in with a weasel on its head
And Craigslist in its face, you get …

Thanks, mansized!

35 Responses leave one →
  1. 2013 February 12
    simmer on low first permalink

    I have the perfect name for this sparky
    Notorious B.A.S (Bad At Spelling)

    Adores: 11
  2. 2013 February 12

    When did rapers start advertising on CL? Wouldn’t the authorities catch on to that and ruin all his big plans?

    Adores: 3
  3. 2013 February 12
    Ralph permalink

    Sparky should trayed day jobs for a mailroom gig raping packages. A good reference might get offer.

    Adores: 5
  4. 2013 February 12

    Sparky, you are beyond help.

    Adores: 3
  5. 2013 February 12

    This is almost as bad as accidentally putting a space in the word “therapist”.

    Adores: 6
    • 2013 February 12

      Or combining the words “analyst” and “therapist”.

      Adores: 7
      • 2013 February 12
        J-dog permalink

        Tobias Fünke
        Analrapist

        Adores: 5
  6. 2013 February 12

    A raper doing big things on a tray? What has been imagined can never be un-imagined.

    Adores: 3
  7. 2013 February 12
    DigitalAxis permalink

    While I appreciate the commemoration of Trayvon Martin’s memory, I don’t think felonious sex is the way to go.

    Adores: 3
    • 2013 February 12
      DigitalAxis permalink

      Felonious Sax is IF’s Thelonious Monk/Kenny G. cover jazz band.

      Adores: 9
  8. 2013 February 12
    kelli permalink

    Bad Sparky! No more computer time for you!

    Adores: 3
  9. 2013 February 12
    Demon Duck of Doom permalink

    Worst desert tray ever.

    Adores: 4
    • 2013 February 12
      CapnMac permalink

      Worst Dessert Wrap, too.

      Adores: 3
  10. 2013 February 12
    HamCan permalink

    RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER RAPER

    Adores: 4
  11. 2013 February 12
    rat with an unblubler permalink

    Trying (traying) to do big things? Can’t help you there. Trying to do time in the big house? Hello, police.

    Adores: 3
  12. 2013 February 12
    One Moving Violation permalink

    Instead of traying, maybe he should just table his fantasy as a raper until he learns how to spell.

    Adores: 3
    • 2013 February 12
      CapnMac permalink

      Traying is the new Planking–whutup, ‘hhup, Rapid City

      Adores: 3
  13. 2013 February 12
    Brer Fox permalink

    Maybe the church he went to annointed him with rapeseed oil.

    Adores: 4
  14. 2013 February 12
    mud "static noise" slicker permalink

    Grim raper.

    Adores: 2
    • 2013 February 12
      HamCan permalink

      Grime raper

      Adores: 2
      • 2013 February 12
        CapnMac permalink

        There’s no “I” in rapier!
        Oh wait, Snap! . . .

        Adores: 2
  15. 2013 February 12
    Brer Fox permalink

    See, I can rap.

    I’m groovy as a record
    I’m clean as your spleen
    I’m a nifty kinda guy
    And my underwear’s clean.
    (Cus my mum bleaches this stuff, it’s really clean.)

    Adores: 2
  16. 2013 February 12
    HamCan permalink

    One raper, Two raper, Red raper, Blue raper,
    Black raper, Blue raper, Old raper, New raper.
    This one has a little car.
    This one has a candy bar.
    Say! What a lot of rapers there are.
    Yes. Some are red, and some are blue.
    Some are old and some are new.
    Some are sad, and some are glad,
    And all are very, very bad.

    Adores: 11
  17. 2013 February 12
    CapnMac permalink

    Hmm, air port code RAP is Rapid City, ND.
    Code TRA is Tarama, Japan.

    Ok, from that, I got nuttin.

    Other than a perverse mental image of a bunch of Japanese in furry Gi and snowshoes engaged in dubstep, other than a vague recollection of that being the first three signs of the ‘pocky’klipse

    Adores: 3
  18. 2013 February 12
    mud "static noise" slicker permalink

    Admiral Ackbar says, “It’s a RAP!!”

    Adores: 3
    • 2013 February 12
      HamCan permalink

      These are not the druids you are looking for…

      Adores: 3
  19. 2013 February 12
    Windrose permalink

    Oh great. Bad enough, we’re a porn site. Now the FBI is watching us very closely. Hope they at least get a chuckle out of this.

    Adores: 3
    • 2013 February 12

      We’re a bad influence on the Intertubez, which is quite an accomplishment.

      Adores: 6
  20. 2013 February 12
    Tankerbell permalink

    Damn it feels good to be a raper
    A real raper-ass Sparky plays his cards right
    A real raper-ass Sparky never does no stinkin’ work
    ’cause real raper-ass Sparkies don’t think right
    And Sparkies always gotta high hopes
    Showin’ all his boys how he’ll make it
    But real raper-ass Sparkies don’t try, dopes
    ’cause real gangsta-ass Sparkies simply fake it
    And everythings cool in the mind of a raper
    ’cause raper-ass Sparkies email
    Beg three-sixty-five a year 24/7
    ’cause this raper-ass Sparky’s all fail.

    And all I gotta say to you
    Wannabe, sad-to-see, e-mailer, better read the paper
    ’cause when the real world dawns what the F you gonna do
    Damn you’re not gonna be a raper

    Adores: 3
  21. 2013 February 12
    Henry permalink

    NEWSPAPER…!
    Keepin’ track of
    your neighborhood RAPER!

    Adores: 3
  22. 2013 February 12
    Lizzi permalink

    Oh. My.

    Adores: 1
  23. 2013 February 12
    Angel permalink

    My neighbor truly is a physical therapist and yes, her email is therapist#####@whateverdomain.com I don’t know if she has a blind spot to alternative spellings or what, but I’m too interested in keeping her as a friendly neighbor to say, “Hey! Guess how your email can be interpreted?!”

    Adores: 2
  24. 2013 February 13

    Hey, Sir Spark-a-little, Imma help you. U can’t touch this. A rap song about big thangs already be done. In 1992. You jiggy wit dat?

    Adores: 2
  25. 2013 February 13

    TC had the set-up, Dan made the pitch, and ghostie hit it outta the lounge! Punchity Punch Punch!

    Good Morning, Rapers United!

    Adores: 0

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