You Suck at Craigslist

YSaC, Vol. 364: It’s a crock, all right.

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drmk

in

FROGS FROGS FROGS!!!!

HELLO ! =)

I HAVE 4 TREE FROGS (THEY ALL CROCK)

3 OF THEM ARE DUMPY WHITE TREE FROGS AND THE OTHER ONE IS A RED LEGED TREE FROG

I WAS HIDING THEM FROM MY PARENTS AND THEY COUGHT ME SO NOW THEY HAVE TO GO =(

THERE GREAT EATERS , THEYRE REALLY HEALTHY,AND SUPER EASY TO TAKE CARE OF

THEY LOVE KRICKES AND BEING IN THE WATER BOWL

THEYER REALLY FRIENDLY LIKE TO BE CARRIED

THEYRE REHOMING FEE IS $21 EACH

THERE AS BIG AS YOUR PALM OF YOUR HAND

Today’s lesson: statistics.

Let’s say you have three forms of a word that sound the same but are spelled differently and mean different things. I don’t know, let’s say those words are there, they’re, and their.

Now let’s say that you write something that uses those words five times. What are the chances, if you use one of the three different spellings randomly each time, that you will get the proper word in the proper place completely by accident at least once? (The answer is, of course, 1 out of 3 — each time you choose a word at random, there’s a 33.33% chance that it was the right one.)

Let’s add in an additional complication, just for fun: let’s say that you aren’t content with just the existing (and correct) three forms of the homonym, and you decide to add in your own incorrect version of the word, theyer. Now what do you think the chances are of getting the right version of the word in the proper place at least once is? (The answer is, of course, 1 out of 4, or 25%.)

Okay, okay. Let’s move on and do a different type of problem. Let’s say that you have four frogs, all of which apparently are capable of enlarging their vocal sacs to act as a resonant chamber for the air being pushed through their larynx. Let’s say that you’re keeping them in your house. What do you think the chances are that your parents will not be able to identify this sound and its location?

Given those odds, and the spelling in the rest of this ad (crock? leged? cought? krickes?), for bonus points: What time will Train A arrive in Chicago?

Thanks for the submission, Kim!

Also: Be sure to check out the update I posted late last night, just below this post. It’s a dramatic adaptation of an earlier spambot posting done by a reader, and it’s fantastic.

Comments

37 responses to “YSaC, Vol. 364: It’s a crock, all right.”

  1. kt Avatar
    kt

    frogs that can crock? shit sign me up, i hate to cook.

  2. corn flakes Avatar
    corn flakes

    I wouldn’t know what to feed them. I have never seen a “Kricke” in pet stores……or anywhere.
    ( And i couldn help but pronounce it in my head with a bad Australian accent. “Crikey!”

    I’m amazed that I googled “dumpy white tree frog” and that was the actual name. It felt like it had to be a mistake.

    1. Megan Avatar
      Megan

      Yeah, he got the dumpy white’s tree frog semi right, but he left off the ‘s. And there is no such thing as a red legged tree frog, maybe he meant red eyed tree frog.

      1. corn flakes Avatar
        corn flakes

        Ah, that’s what i get for not checking both frogs.
        Maybe it isn’t a name, it’s just a description.
        “hey, i got a frog with red leges. Theiyre cool!”

  3. JtDL Avatar
    JtDL

    I like the rehoming fee.

  4. Mike Avatar
    Mike

    Actually… You got the answers wrong. The first one is something like 86.8% and the second – around 76.3%. You are welcome! 🙂

    1. drmk Avatar
      drmk

      You’re thinking of the possibility that he’ll get at least one right out of the five occurrences, and you’re right about that — but I was just thinking of each occurrence individually. If you have three choices, and you pick one randomly, you’ve got a 1 in 3 chance of picking the right one.

      1. Mike Avatar
        Mike

        In that case, we are both right! Yay!

        1. drmk Avatar
          drmk

          Yay!

  5. PrincessLuceval Avatar
    PrincessLuceval

    I WAS HIDING THEM FROM MY PARENTS AND THEY COUGHT ME SO NOW THEY HAVE TO GO =(

    Aw, look, he’s sad that his parents have to go.

    And the title has me singing the old Motley Crue song.

  6. HorribleLicensePlates Avatar
    HorribleLicensePlates

    Love me some KRICKES!!

  7. You Suck at Kijiji Avatar
    You Suck at Kijiji

    This ad makes me want to smother someone with the palm of my hand … or eat chocolate. It hurts my soul.

    1. corn flakes Avatar
      corn flakes

      I like that those are your 2 options for an aching soul.
      That is going to be my new response for everything.
      mofo’s need to hope i have chocolate around!

      1. DooeyD Avatar
        DooeyD

        Second this.

      2. You Suck at Kijiji Avatar
        You Suck at Kijiji

        On closer inspection the day after, I realize that I didn’t even realize before that there was any reference in the ad to palms of hands. It somehow buried its way into my subconscious …

        … for the record, I went with “eat chocolate” as all the people around me yesterday were too necessary to smother.

        1. corn flakes Avatar
          corn flakes

          wow. I get the feeling i could buy some really awesome pot from you.

  8. dogface Avatar
    dogface

    I’m just wondering where exactly they were hiding the frogs. I mean, those frogs need a lot of room. It also seems that their enclosures require a lot of effort (and money) that somebody who has to worry about their parents forbidding certain pets probably can’t give. Poor frogs. :c

    http://exoticpets.about.com/cs/frogsandtoads/a/whitestreefrog_2.htm

    1. drmk Avatar
      drmk

      I think we can all agree that it’s probably for the best that this person is looking for a new home for these frogs.

      1. Panthera Avatar
        Panthera

        Every time I glance over your pic I think it’s a nun in a blue and black headdress. o.O

        Oh, and I hope somebody actually takes the frogs off his hands.. I’m not sure I want to know what he’ll do with them otherwise.

      2. dogface Avatar
        dogface

        I keep seeing an angry emu.

        But yeah, at least they’re going elsewhere, hopefully to a more experienced/mature owner.

        1. drmk Avatar
          drmk

          It’s a llama!

      3. PrincessLuceval Avatar
        PrincessLuceval

        “A llama??!! He’s supposed to be DEAD!”

        Oh, I also see a nun at first.

        1. drmk Avatar
          drmk

          I don’t want to know what Catholic school you all went to.

        2. Lola Avatar
          Lola

          Nun, or woman in burqa.
          Public school and Protestant here, FWIW.

  9. Mark Avatar
    Mark

    That’s easy! Train A will arrive at 8:15pm.

    1. Colleen in MA Avatar
      Colleen in MA

      Actually, I believe that Train A does not any part of this, um, train wreck.

      Bada bing, folks! I’ll be here all week…

  10. Sabra Avatar
    Sabra

    My oldest daughter spells like this. Of course, she is seven, and only learned how to read and write this past school year. Oh, & she’s not hiding tree frogs.

    1. drbtx1 Avatar
      drbtx1

      Or if she is, she’s hiding them better than this person was.

  11. Katie Avatar
    Katie

    Are we sure the poster isn’t actually seven? I mean, I really hope that’s the case. Mom and Dad say, “you let those things loose right now!” and big bro says, “c’mon buddy, we’ll sell them to nice people online, you write up the ad, and I’ll help you post it.”

    1. Jimakaphil Avatar
      Jimakaphil

      That’s possible, but it would be a pretty clever 7 year old to ask for a “rehoming fee.” I’m wagering on a 37 year old living in his parents’ basement.

      1. Windrose Avatar
        Windrose

        Oh, I do hope so! I think the frogs would have been nice and cozy, in a damp, dank sort-of way, in a basement.

  12. casualencounters.com/blog/ Avatar
    casualencounters.com/blog/

    You know, if I’d been browsing listings I would have totally ignored this one if the poster had only employed three exclamation marks in the title. Good call to add the fourth.

  13. jackie31337 Avatar
    jackie31337

    Why is this the first thing that came to mind for me when I read the title of the CL post? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J8QTeIxWCEM

    1. drmk Avatar
      drmk

      Are you saying that the frogs are countertenors?

      1. jackie31337 Avatar
        jackie31337

        Or maybe castrati, I can’t be sure without getting a better look at them.

  14. My Evil Twin Avatar
    My Evil Twin

    “Theyer” is SO a word. Haven’t you ever been to the South? “It’s over theyer.”

  15. Monica Avatar
    Monica

    FROGS FROGS FROGS!!!!!!!!!

    Oh God I don’t know why that made me crack up

    …how do you go out and get these NON-NATIVE frogs and hide them?

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