2008 October 4
by drmk

3 lacawates valtrus-suka–update 10/4–only 2 left

i have 4 of these, if interested email for address(value of these-well you know)these are still in good oncdition,they are free for the taking
sorry no pic camera is brocken
only 3 now
updated sat morning,now theres only 2 available –i mite keep one

I have no idea what this is, but I really, really want one.

And, as it turns out, it’s a Googlewhack — if you Google for “lacawates valtrus-suka” to find out what it is, you get exactly one result — the original Craigslist ad. Of course, now you’re likely to get this page as well.

(*Hello, everyone who arrived here from trying to figure out what a lacawates valtrus-suka is!*)

Submitted by Kris — thanks!

41 Responses leave one →
  1. 2008 October 4

    whatever it is, it must be popular if there are only 2 left now…

    Adores: 4
  2. 2008 October 18
    Kiraboo permalink

    I love this part: “(value of these-well you know)”. No, sorry, I don’t know, I don’t even know what you’re selling. But considering the horrible spelling in the rest of the post, I’m guessing it could be just about anything.

    I also had to laugh at this: when I Googled lacawates valtrus-suka, Google asked “Did you mean: cacawates valtrus-suka?”, and when I clicked on that- NO RESULTS!! Google, you’re so helpful.

    Adores: 30
  3. 2008 October 19
    drmk permalink

    I know, isn’t that hilarious? The same thing happened to me when I googled for it, and I thought, “Oh, a cacawates valtus-suka must actually be a thing.” But, alas, no.

    Adores: 3
  4. 2008 November 20

    I know – why does Google do that? What taunting, condescending algorithm was invented to make us feel stupid?

    Adores: 4
  5. 2008 November 22
    anon permalink

    I couldn’t find anything for that phrase but I did find a band called Cacawates on MySpace. I also found some other videos on YouTube labeled Los Cacawates but since the descriptions and spoken languate is Spanish, I’m not sure what they are about. I couldn’t figure out what the heck valtrus-suka meant.

    Either option is a reasonable bet since the spelling resembles that of most MySpace users (Cacawates), or lacawates could be a contraction formed by an ESL writer for L’acawates (Los Cacawates) although I have never seen that before.

    So many mysteries, so little time.

    Adores: 2
  6. 2008 November 22
    anon permalink


    Adores: 1
  7. 2008 November 22
    drmk permalink

    That doesn’t really make sense with the rest of the post though — not that the rest of the post actually makes sense, mind you.

    Adores: 2
  8. 2009 August 4
    bobora permalink

    Cacawates is a phonetic spelling of the Mexican Spanish word for peanuts (cacahuates). I don’t know what a “lacawates valtrus-suka” is, but somehow I doubt it has anything to do with Mexican peanuts.

    Adores: 9
  9. 2009 August 4
    Nathan permalink

    But at least its in good oncdition. I hate it when I order a lacawatas valtras-suka and it comes in bad oncdition.

    Almost as bad as when your camera brocks.

    Adores: 27
    • 2009 August 9
      D / DM permalink

      I think you mean “when your camera brecks.” Brock = past tense.

      Adores: 26
      • 2009 August 25
        tigprincess permalink

        please stop! my keyboard will breke from splti ocffee. LOL xx

        Adores: 16
  10. 2009 August 6
    Linda permalink

    I can’t stop crying over this one and all of your responses.

    Adores: 2
  11. 2009 August 20
    Heidi permalink

    okay, this is my new favorite website! hahahaha! I laughing so hard, my stomach hurts! ha!

    Adores: 3
  12. 2009 August 30
    Ellen permalink

    As it turns out, it’s NOT a Googlewhack. To be a legal Googlewhack, you must enter 2 real words (they must individually link to a definition) that together return exactly one hit. Made up words don’t count. Sorry.

    Adores: 2
  13. 2009 September 9
    Tonya permalink

    A suka is the Russian word for bitch (slang). I don’t know whether this site has a cuss-guard, but in case the word is bleeped out, it rhymes with hitch. I am every bit as stumped as to the other two words… Maybe it’s a new language… like when cartoon characters do something screwy and they say things like “lacawaca-waca-waca…” Perhaps he is selling a cartoon bitch?

    Adores: 3
  14. 2009 September 17
    KikiMayMay permalink

    “lacawates valtrus-suka” actually hits three websites now. I was curious. The third hit? A twitter account–evidently concerning the election riots in Iran.
    I just don’t get it.

    Adores: 4
  15. 2009 September 23

    I suspect it refers to lacquerware, especially as specific types are usually referred to by their Japanese or Burmese names (like tsuikin), but Lord knows there’s no way to tell now. I can only regret I didn’t get a chance at my very own lacawate valtrus-suka. :c

    Adores: 2
  16. 2009 September 24
    roughpaws permalink

    Wanna know something absolutely awesome?

    Over a YEAR has passed since this post apparently graced the epic pages of craigslist, and google still has no better results then before.

    If you start typing in “lacawates”, google automatically pops up with “cacawates valtrus-suka” now.

    Adores: 11
  17. 2009 November 13
    Yuri permalink

    Suka- in Russian mean bitch!

    Adores: 1
  18. 2009 December 9
    knockerovels permalink

    In Russia bitch mean to YOU.

    Adores: 25
  19. 2010 February 17
    lavachat permalink

    My Guess: the dork sounded out the botanical name of an indian/african mint hybrid (meaning the plant, not the sweets):
    Leonotis (nepetifolia) Baltru-Suka
    A red-blooming hybrid of a perennial medicinal herb, grows to about 3m, blooms July to October. Named after the native gardener that bred it – so valtru-suka might be a valid transcription.

    For a healthy plant you’d get about $10 – 30.
    My mother loved them, had some varieties.

    Sorry to spoil the fun – I really lmao reading that and all your comments – but deciphering strangly spelled zoological/botanical names is a knee-jerk reaction with me.

    Adores: 12
  20. 2010 February 24
    Rachael permalink

    The mystery is solved! Good work, Holmes.

    Adores: 1
  21. 2010 February 28

    Someone else please tell me they’re seeing this, too.

    Adores: 1
    • 2010 February 28
      Windrose permalink

      Seeing, not believing. Alien Pron!

      Adores: 1
    • 2010 February 28
      penguin permalink

      Trerheawl misread and thought the name of the site was You Suck at Porn.

      Adores: 2
    • 2010 February 28

      Admin: the post the above comments refer to has been deleted (and reported) as being spam.

      Adores: 1
      • 2010 February 28
        Windrose permalink

        drmk to the rescue!

        Adores: 1
  22. 2010 March 4
    NotABrainiac permalink

    So, someone suggested “cacawates”…cacahuete is the Spanish word for peanut, but other than that, I got nothing.

    Adores: 1
  23. 2010 March 26
    abster permalink

    lavachat seems to think it’s somebody who attempted to phoenetically spell a plant called: Leonotis (nepetifolia) Baltru-Suka

    but aren’t we giving this CL poster waaaay too much credit? i don’t mean to be prejudiced against people who post CL ads that are THIS bad, but what are the odds someone who can’t spell “broken” is hanging onto some fancy gem of a plant AND knows what it is called. sort of.

    Adores: 2
    • 2010 June 7

      More importantly, Lacawates ≠ Phonetic Pronunciation of Leonotis.

      **motions for posters stuck in the deep dark bowels archives of YSaC to come into the Snark Lounge currently located in the June 2010 wing. Y’know, where there’s more than just the occasional regular showing up to check if anyone has solved an ancient mystery, and there are few spiders. But there are more zomb

      Adores: 1
      • 2010 June 7

        Astrognash, I love when people go read old posts! I love it even more when they read old posts and comment — and hopefully, when they then start commenting on the current posts because they recognize all the in-jokes/memes/stupid things that go on around here.

        Adores: 1
        • 2010 June 12
          Steph permalink

          Oh, yes. I finally figured out the whole Bacontini thing… I have yet to figure out Corey, though… I guess I haven’t gone far enough back.

          Adores: 1
        • 2010 June 12

          Steph, if you go to the forums, under the ysac memes you can find the source of Corey. As an aside, one of the things I remember about Corey was that really we were nice to him, and tried to be helpful. He just didn’t want to play along.

          Adores: 2
        • 2013 November 3
          Katimomkat permalink

          Steph, seeing as I’m replying to your question more than three years later, you may never see this comment. I found the definition of [Corey] on Urban Dictionary. It’s useful for figuring out what most of the acronyms used, such as BBW, M4W and gl, mean. [In my defense, I’ve never read any “Personals” ads before.] I hope this helps.

          Adores: 0
  24. 2010 July 2

    And this person can vote.

    Shame on democracy!

    Adores: 1
    • 2010 October 16
      NotMyName permalink

      Where does it say that they can vote? I don’t see the logic. Yeah, I know this is probably a very old comment, but still…

      Adores: 1
  25. 2010 November 17
    HerbalDog permalink

    There are now 4 pages of Google results, mostly asking what a lacawates valtrus-suka is. LOL!

    Adores: 3
    • 2011 January 8
      LurkRealClose permalink

      Up to 6 pages, now. 🙂

      Adores: 2
      • 2011 January 8
        Windrose permalink

        And still, no clear answer. How interesting!

        Adores: 2
  26. 2011 August 2
    funky monkey permalink

    I may have overlooked where someone else dug this up, but here:



    Adores: 1
  27. 2012 September 13
    AnnaEA permalink

    I think this might be phonetic French. I don’t speak it very well at all, but the end of “valtrus-suka” is very close to va le tres sucre , roughly “the very sweet” or “adorable”.

    Adores: 0

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