YSaC, Vol. 609: Saul Bass, this ain’t.
2010 March 18
Oh, look, it’s … today. That means it’s time for another installment of “Bad Titles”.
*cheers from the crowd*
minnie poddle
This minnie poddle is great with kids and loves car rides. He also comes with a “50 re homing free”.
Not looking for a pet today? Looking for a job? Okay, how about this:
Living Caretaker Needed
You’re living, right? Then you’ve got one of the qualifications required already!
central heat and nair unit’s
Wow, that’s some powerful heat! It crisped my leg hair right off!
HEY NON EMU MUSICIANS
The ostrimu is very upset by this one. When will this persecution of ratites end? We demand social justice for musically inclined flightless birds!
Thanks for the submissions, Natasha, Brendan, justmommy, and Leslie!
http://static.squidoo.com/resize/squidoo_images/250/draft_lens1545704module56617612photo_1252604521micky_mouse_dog_costume.jpg
Couldn’t find a Minnie Poodle, but found a Mickey Pug!!!
That’s a rather massive link you have there Meredith.
Jealous? 😉
I considered whipping out my massive link for comparison, but I think that would be breaking severeal internet decency laws.
If indeed the internet HAD decency laws.
Sounds like Taco’s got link envy.
S’okay, I get that a lot from the boys. They just can’t believe mine’s bigger than theirs.
It’s not the size of the link that matters, it’s the speed of the page load!
*Sniff*
That’s right, sugar, you just keep telling yourself that.
I’m sure it happens to a lot of guys.
It’s not the size of the link that matters, but whether it yanks my chain. *wink*
It’s not the size that matters, it’s where it links to.
It’s the content.
Here’s a link to my massive link:
http://www.yousuckatcraigslist.com/?p=3858#comment-21866
If only mine didn’t have that pesky line break in the middle. It was the result of a parsing accident when I was a child.
You see, Taco got his link caught in a rice-picking machine when he was a child…
On my screen, Meredith’s fairly-massive link overlaps the sidebar on the right at *just* the right place for the t-shirt block to read “Want a Not.A.Lion t-shirt AND a Llama-nun’s costume.jpg? Of course you do!”
And, really, of course I do! A Llama-nun costume (.jpg or not) would be amusing.
Well, it worked until the Don’t Suck box changed, anyway.
Right now I’m getting:
Adds by Googleize_dog_costume.jpg
You know, guys, there is a way to clothe your links in regular text so that the massive ones don’t break the style-sheet. (The trick does not only work for links to my blog…)
Give us the html tag sequence then pretty please. I’ve tried that before on another website and I kept getting an error message even though I kept re-checking how I set up the tag. So I never bothered to try it again and just got lazy.
It’s easy.
open angle brackets a href=”your link here” close angle brackets THEN TYPE YOUR TEXT THAT DIRECTS TO THE LINK open angle brackets forward-slash a close angle brackets
I think that’s pretty standard blog xhtml.
Thanks Isaac. I’m almost positive that was what I was doing but couldn’t figure why it wasn’t working; either it was stuck on stupid or I was.
It wasn’t on this blog btw, but I just ended up giving up after that—because that was 20 minutes of my life I knew I was never going to get back.
It is. But if we actually used those (as I have on occassion) we wouldn’t be able to flash our massive links around.
Also, if you want to show an angle brackes it’s < and >.
So the code looks like:
<A href=’htmlcode’> “Text you wish to appear as link” </A>
“Also, if you want to show an angle brackes it’s < and >”
Is that ASCII, or are you just happy to see me?
A pet, a job, a place to live, and uh, something else! Craigslist has it all. If only there were somewhere to find a person’s soul mate. . .
I remember Minnie Poddle from Hee-Haw. She was a lot of fun.
I had a minnie poddle once, but my ShamWow! cleaned it right up.
Serendipity! We should get the flamingo guitarist together with the non-emu musicians!
I wonder if it’s just flightless birds, though. I mean, could say a condor apply?
Probably, but I bet vultures are limited to band management, recording deals, and security.
Well, if they need more musicians, they could hire the remaining members of Penguin Supply.
I don’t think Flock of Seagulls is doing much these days.
Maybe hanging around the landfill and regretting certain hairstyle choices.
Well… my post ended up in very special place due to those damn computer gremlins again. I’m going to try to relocate it to it’s correct location.
Remember, those hairstyle choices got them mentioned in “Pulp Fiction.”
Take that Kajagoogoo!
Yesterdays was St. Patty’s so they’re probably very hungover.
You aren’t trying to imply that flamingos are flightless, are you?
[corey] flap flap poop [/corey]
You see how suavely I embedded that link?
You are a suave link embedder. I’ll call you Friar Suave from now on.
Always dicey to correct the good friar, but did you perhaps mean “embedded that link”? It just seems, well, dirtier that way…
Post to post, pedant to da Corey, tonsured male.
Across the comments, fixing the grammar, links for sale…
Suave link embedder…
Suave … link embedder…
*giggles*
Mudsy likes the way Isaac embeds his link.
Sarajean! You’re going to teach me bad things.
you already know bad things HHNF, lots of them according to Graham *chuckle*
You’re never too old to learn.
And now it’s time for an embed time story. 8)
Just don’t try to “embed” too many links in the same comment, or you’ll get “held for moderation”. (I feel like I should be on the blog of unnecessary quotation marks.)
It’s true, Jackie. I did that once, and drmk “moderated” me for what seemed like hours!
oooh, was it painful?
Some people like it when it’s painful … 8)
It figures that the combination of a llama and a nun would have a hell of a lot of stamina.
Don’t let the Ostrimu find out!
Oh, he knows.
Spock quote, drmk?
Oh, that’s harsh! Some of the best musicians I know are emus.
Let’s see, one minnie poddle plus one $50 re-homing free = 42 pancake sammiches…unless my CatMath calculator is broken again.
That’s the thing about Cat Math calculators. There’s no way to know when they’re broken…
Sure there is, you get uniform results in base(poddle) instead of base(cat).
You try to put my cat in a uniform and the only result you’ll get is your face scratched off.
And you can’t get a good base on them without cloroform and lots of super glue.
Looks like we’ve got the start of a “Battle of the Bands.”
Minnie Poodle
Living Caretakers
Nair Unit
Non-Emu Band
Tough competition this year. The winner will be chosen by last year’s winner: Baiec Nail.
Minnie Poodle = J-Pop (or possibly K-Pop)
Living Caretakers = Goth
Nair Unit = ’80s-style heavy metal
Non-Emu Band = avian separatist hardcore
Correction: Living Caretakers might be emo. I mean, you want your caretakers to be (in addition to living) sensitive, don’t you?
Would make a nice change from all those damn zombie caretakers you see. I guess it pays to be more specific.
And here I was really hoping that Living Caretakers were a Polka band.
Well, yes, as clearly, the zombie caretakers are only interested in BRaaiiiiiinsssss
Dang, and SJB beat me to it again.
I don’t know, Living Caretakers kind of has the ring of an 80s new wave band to me.
I hear “Nair Unit” more as a post-New-Wave electro-art-pop heavily ironic studio band, sort of like Art of Noise updating Frank Zappa. But maybe that’s just me.
I would totally listen to that.
At least once.
I have a minnie poddle for sale!!!!!you can take it for 50 re homing free!!!!!
Minnie Poddle and The Living Caretakers sounds like the follow up to the Harry Potter series. It takes place 100 years after the original story and Harry’s gang of aging wizards is wreaking havoc on St. Mungo’s senior living unit. It’s up to Minnie, the newest healer intern, to keep the dementia-addled Potter in check.
Night of the Living Caretakers!
Ike, FTW!
Egads, wizards with dementia?
Random patronus; creatures transmogrified; random teleportations and flying household appliances?
Beggars imagination, almost.
Harry Potter and the Living Caretaker, the Twilight Years.
Nah, they’d have to move to the Pacific Northwest and start hanging out with the moody, sparkly undead. That would would never be popular.
*pleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseplease*
Harry Potter and the Living Caretaker, the Twilight Years
Excerpt:
Bella looked across the table, longing yet pensively anxious in the feelings that, while confusing and contradictory, were strong nonetheless. Her heart skipped several beats, starting a cascade of rhythm that lead to a small, heart style percussion solo in her chest. She licked her lips and tasted the strawberry lip gloss she had applied only moments before; it was the kind with the flavored glitter in it. Though she didn’t know how they made the glitter so flavorful, she liked it anyway. She leaned across the table towards the dark haired youth sitting across from her and uttered, “Harry, I think I love you. You’re the coolest vampire at the school now.”
“I’m not a freaking vampire, how many times do I have to tell you idiots that? I may be moody, self-effacing in my relationships with others, and wracked with simultaneous feelings of entitlement and despair, but I DO NOT SPARKLE!”
“Oh,” Bella said, losing interest, “And I thought you were cool.”
Just win.
I do recall a comment about Stephenie Meyers’ editor the other day.
That first sentence was one of the most painful things I’ve written in recent history.
Dealing with Twilight is a horrible sentence anyways.
TM, you are my hero of the posts so far today. That was awesome and rather scary in it’s accuracy, from what little of Twilight I’ve been forcibly subjected to.
Ugh. It was painful to read, TM
And how is it you know so much about strawberry glitter lip gloss?
He found out alot about strawberry lip gloss during his Hannah Montana phase.
That must be what they talk about over on the Hannah Montana forums, comparing and contrasting the flavors of different glitter glosses.
Speaking of being self-effacing in the relationships I have with others… 🙂
“Dealing with Twilight is a horrible sentence anyways.”
A lot of terrible sentences, formed into script pages, “acted” by robots.
@ Taco- “a small, heart style percussion solo in her chest. ”
Was it a “flamingo” percussion solo?
Well it certainly wasn’t emu.
“acted” by robots.
Robots would have emoted better.
CNC machinery has more joi d’vivre
Muggles aren’t supposed to know that dementia is a side-effect of too many Obliviates.
I’ve always wondered if the Moogles are in on the conspiracy. They’re so cute… yet, there’s that little hint of malice in their “kupo”ing.
The Moogles are in town?
Think we can get Demented Wizards to open?
I wonder if cat math could help me calculate the amount of time or number of posts it takes before the comments stray so far off topic that I have to scroll back up to the original post to see what it was about.
I love it. Makes me giggle every day 🙂
It’s usually less than three comments. <3.
Sometimes it’s less than that…
BANANA PEEL! Wheeeeeeeee!
orange meringue!!!
boiled peanuts!
Wait, what?
minty shells!
I like pudding!
*Hits Bianchi with a foam tuna*
Bring that over here, Taco. I think my foam is out of tune.
“Why a duck? Why not a chicken?”
Get a room, racist!
*Double meme score*
“Double Meme Score” – just possibly should be the YSAC house band.
What do you get if you cross a llamanun with an ostrimu?
A Llamimu?
A nostrum?
A lost numen?
Thanks to Meredith’s massive link it was less than one today. Might be a record for us.
What can I say? Whether it be my massive link or my ginormous sweater hams, I tend to distract from the subject at hand.
But you are distracting in a good way ♥
I think Ginormous Sweater Hams should join today’s line-up. I’d say they sound like Indie Rock.
I know I find
themyou distracting…Her eyes are up there, Isaac.
so … what *was* the original subject again? I finally waded my way back from all the other ginormous linkage journeys and now I’m soooo confuzzled.
Amused as Hell and still chuckling, but still confuzzled.
I think the original poster had attached a flamingo lurning tool to the back of his SUV and taken a picture of it, then labeled it erroneously as a lion and offered to sell it for free OBO.
1000+elebenty hunnert!! OMG…to tears, Isaac, to tears…*catching breath*…thanks, man..
oh, before I disappear again I thought I should say, I’m away this weekend visiting some friends that I haven’t seen in over a year.
I’ll be back on tuesday though, honest.
We’ll be up to no good, until then. You know where to find us!
I’ll do my best *chuckle* I might drop in over the weekend as hubby will almost certainly take his laptop. Only problem is I have to prise it out of his hands first, and if he’s deep in facebook that wont be easy.
In the long-ago mists of YSaC, a certain gentleperson could be found in the Don’t Suck box two and three times a week.* He was the benchmark we all tried to reach, and usually failed. Then came a time when his light did not shine as brightly, his comments were seen less often, and we began to wonder if the glory would grace our lives again. Today, it has come to pass that I have lots more time to waste than usual, on a Thursday night. And so lost_compass, welcome back to the Don’t Suck box! Come get punched, and sing a few rounds of (place name of melancholy old standard here) with the gang!
Thanks, Windrose. Seriously, “punchety-punch” would have been enough.
Maybe. I even forgot to complete my * footnote that This may not be true. 8/ But really, come by more often! 8)
There have been many worthy lost_compass submissions. I just try to mix things up a bit sometimes.
senior living can be costly if you have not found a very good company or that offers a great deal ;.-