Paradactyl Kittens
I have 4 kittens, which 3 of them have many toes. Ready to be in forever homes in 1 week Small re-homing fee applies to make sure they go to wonderful homes. There is a picture of mama kitty.
Oh dear. I worry that the poster may have something like this:
Thanks for the nightmare, AGPOD!
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To me it’s less scary than the highly flammable petrodactyl kitty.
It took me embarassingly long to figure that one out. Doors and doffed hats to Taco!
It took Fridge Brilliance for me to figure that one out… I was halfway down the page, and then the light bulb went on 🙂
I didn’t notice when I read it earlier, but I got it on my 2nd read.
Today’s Google search:
Paradactyl = The by product of a paratrooper and fossil that got it on…….
Sadly it appears “paradactyl” is a common mispelling of the actual word the poster meant to use.
No – is real! Google it: Paradactyl paratrooper fossil
2nd entry……
Well, if the Urban Dictionary says it’s real, it must be true. The Urban Dictionary would never contain misinformation.
Heh! All your linking just moved it up to the first entry. YSaC Rules!!
Avatar, your link led me to Google, which suggested Teradactyl paratrooper fossil, which still isn’t right.
NMN – Google is smart like that. Follow the link again and look down the list to find an entry titled:
Urban Dictionary: Paradactyl
WAIT! What if they mean a pair of dactyl kittens? It makes no more sense, but is better than paradactyl kittens.
Is nobody going to point out that I misspelled “mispelling”!
Where are all the corrections today!
*Sulks*
I thought you were talking about Ms. Tori Spelling…
Miss Spell flashes TM a seductive smile and instantly TM is transformed into queso derretido……….
I think that Isaac’s absence has made everyone less pedantic. You should have seen what they let me get away with this weekend.
Hey Taco, you misspelled “mispelling.”
christina, we gave you a free pass because of the drugs. Next time, we’ll be sure not to let you get away with anything.
But we do miss Isaac.
[Origin of Species corey]I have no idea why Michael Crichton picked frog DNA for Jurassic Park. Bird DNA would have actually made sense, but nooooo let’s go with frog.[/corey]
I’m guessing he wanted his spontaneous gonad growth to make a tiny bit of sense. The bigger question is why a team of highly paid biologists with access to millions if not billions of dollars of research failed to learn about the tranny frogs and pick another species. I guess they didn’t see the same Discovery Channel special that the main character did.
They’re also going to need to go back and remove the triceratops from the movie (or at least rename them to Torosaurs).
And make the T-Rex a scavenger instead of a fierce hunter.
You know what, science is killing my childhood! Screw it, who needs facts! I’m gonna pretend that the triceretops still existed… and it rode a magical dragon to the moon to have tea every night! And had pillow fights with the Easter Island aliens before falling asleep on a giant marshmallow bed!
Maybe it’s time I had some coffee this morning.
Oh and the dirty old man hands of science better stay the hell away from the Stegosaur!
You either need more sleep or more coffee. I’m guessing Tron has made one of those impossible though, so you might want to have an extra slice.
Also, velociraptors were never that big. That ruined Jurassic Park for me, as well as the fact that velociraptors apparently had feathers on them.
You could just have caffeinated marshmallows, while you’re on the topic.
The fact that the oversized velociraptors seemed to have evolved the feathers in the brief period between movies annoyed the heck out of me.
Wait, what happened to the triceratops?? I must have missed that one!
It turns out that the Triceratops is just a juvenile Torosaurus.
Linky
I guess I will have to pay more attention to paleontology, because I’m sure MiniEB will be into dinos in the next year or so… (and we’re dressing him up as a dino for halloween this year :-D)
[corey]If you haven’t already, you may want to brace your family for the T-Rex being reclassified as a carrion eater.
A physiologic analysis of the T-Rex shows that it has more in common with modern vultures than it does with modern raptors, whereas other dinosaur hunters are very similar to modern raptors. Similarly mathematical modeling shows that the T-Rex would not have been very nimble or fast, making it, at best, a clumsy hunter.
It isn’t mainstream yet, but it’s gathering momentum.[/corey]
Hey, if the dinos could spontaneously grow gonads, then why not feathers, hmmmm?
The first one was pretty, if not scientifically accurate, the second one annoyed the clothespin bejeebus out of me and I only went to the third one because they had some good one-liners and amusing visual effects. Once upon a time, you could sell me on going to see a movie on one-liners.
And, let’s be honest, Crichton used up his entire store of clever science in Andromeda strain with the blood Ph thing.
(and aren’t they finding that a surprising number of species can alter gonad types these days?)
Taco, I was vaguely aware of that somewhere in my brain. According to the link you sent me, though, the torosaurus is being renamed triceratops, because the name is more well known. It’s the brontosaurus that’s being renamed in favor of Apatosaurus, because Apatosaurus was documented first. *shiney letters* Now you know!
Actually it was the writer of the article who wanted the torosaurus renamed. So far as I’m aware the palentologists are going with Torosaurus.
That’s not to say that Triceratops won’t be the common name. It’s not like the science community has ever been very successful with name changes.
EDIT: Nevermind. Upon further research it is indeed the Torosaurus that is being reclassified as Triceratops.
Apatosaurus? I didn’t know Judd Apatow discovered a dinosaur!
In hindsight I would like to replace “his” in that first sentence with “their”, that way it looks less like I’m saying Michael Crichton can spontaneously grow balls.
Considering that he’s dead, that’d be quite a feat.
*is not a Crichton fan, for some reason* *
*yes, that’s random**
**no coffee yet here either
It’d be at the top of the list of Lamest Superpowers Ever.
I was a Crichton fan, but mostly of his other books and only the first of the JP books (after that he pretty much sold out and was writing the books so he could make movies from them).
But I don’t hold selling out against him. My wife’s plans (if she becomes a famous author) is to totally sell out, make a bunch of money from selling out to Hollywood and mechandice companies then retire.
The more likely situation is her publishing on Amazon Kindle and making $200 a month from her book. C’est la Vie.
Correction, SaraJean, the lamest superpower ever is the ability to stretch. That seems pretty useless. On a side note, if you could have any superpower, what would it be and why?*
(I love asking that question.)
*The ability to have all powers does not count.
I wouldn’t mind having the ability to stretch; I’m pretty short and it would be nice not to have to hassle complete strangers for items on the top shelf at the grocery store. The ability to spontaneously produce male genitalia would only really be handy if there was a line to the ladies’ room.
My superpower of choice would be teleportation, then I could go wherever I wanted without all the tedious travelling.
Nope. Pretty sure I’d have more fun with the stretchy-thingy than being able to spontaneously grow balls.
Just the amount of time saved that I’d otherwise spend contorting to plug in ethernet cables or read drop numbers off wall plates due to inconveniently placed desks would make it worthwhile.
And then there was that computer inside the protective steel case which needed a new hard drive and optical drive.
Then, there’s the whole “having to get up to get the remote” thing. Ooh, and I could roll down my windows on the freeway and then use my body to create evaporative surfaces that also cut down on wind resistance so I could be cool AND save gas.
And just THINK of the eating contests you could win!
I don’t think gonads would aid in any of these endeavors. 😉
Uhh wow Moira, you’ve really thought this out…kind of creepily thought out actually.
My work here is done.*
Having to crawl over and under and around and on top of office furniture in adherence to my duties has made me long for the ability to be more stretchy/compressible/bendy/etc.
Oh, and then there was the time we dropped that tool behind the giant fixed workbench and removed all the drawers and the skinniest guy in the department sorta wedged himself in there to retreive it.
Also, it would make re-wiring my house and re-insulating it soooooo much easier. The access hatches in the closet are teeny and it’s quite a challenge to rotate oneself in the proper ways to get out from under the house once you’ve managed to get down there. Idon’t know why that it, but it is. I haven’t tried to crawl in the above space.
I could go on, but I think I have already scared you. Erm… have some chocolate?
*This may not be true.
Sarajean, that was you the other day inTarget? You seemed a bit more…elderly.
I do get asked to reach things from the top shelves in the grocery store often.
I want the power to talk to animals. but for one day only. Somethings tells me I’d get really sick of hearing my dogs tell me that there is a squirrel in the tree.
I dress like a little old lady sometimes so I can get the sweet parking places up front.*
I can pretty much tell what my cats are thinking, it’s one of five things;
Feed me.
Pet me.
Turn the faucet on so I can watch the water.
Feed me again.
Zzzzzzzz.
*Possibly not true.
If I could have a superpower, I’d want the ability to nullify all other superpowers.
“Look! Up in the sky! It’s superman. What the foxtrot?! He’s falling! It’s like his ability to fly has somehow been nullified. Oh yuck, he’s a sidewalk pancake.”
Ok, and I’d have your power Kelli. We’d nullify eachother’s power, and a hole would rip in the fabric of the universe.
SJ, you’re playing around with your avatar again, and it took me until here (well, here being the comment whose “reply” button I clicked) to notice.
Taco, please explain this mechandice companies of which you speak. *sigh. He won’t see this unless he does some back checking tomorrow*
I think he meant merkin dice, they are kind of like the fuzzy dice you hang from your mirror only you hang them…
What?
OK, I’m going to the corner now.
“spontaneous gonad growth” – what a great name for a band.
I think that’s the name of Irregular Fractal’s Steppenwolf cover band.
SteampunkGoogler, you’ve officially replaced Mindfield as the commenter whose avatar freaked me out most the first time I saw it scrolling down the page.
I would want teleportation as well. I could just teleport from class to class to home, and I could viably go all sorts of places without ever having to learn to drive. Or pay to get in. Like home/school. And Yellowstone. And
Fort KnoxThe U.S. MintDisney World.I would want the ability to move backward through time (and return to present, of course). There are SO many historical events that I would want to witness up close. Just imagine. And think of the inaccuracies that could be corrected! Moira’s wish is probably more practical, tho.
And granted, p**ing standing up is also quite useful. I have cursed many a time when that ability would have come in handy. However, I don’t need to grow b*lls. Mr. Eyebrows says I exercise my internal ones plenty often enough. Bwah-ha-ha-ha!
Poking? Poling? Bills? Bells?
My three little
hellspawned terrorsbeautiful darlings get into enough trouble without having leathery membraneous wings supported by elongated finger bones.Also, anyone else think Mommy Dearest there looks like Satan’s Lap-Cat?
ZUUUUUUUUL!
Tonight only at the 40 Watt, Satan’s Lap Cats!
With special guest The Dirty Old Man Hands of Science!
The 40 Watt is having burlesque revival shows now? Hip!
If the women are replaced by men, is it still burlesque?
Er, beefcake burlesque?
Burlyesque
Hurleyburleyesque?
Satan’s Lap Cats… Isn’t that what Harvey Keitel called vampires
in “From Dusk til Dawn”?
Hypno-cat can protect you from the hypno-dogs. When she’s in the mood.
And there’s nothing shiny or stringlike around to distract her. And she’s not sleeping. And there’s not the possibility of being fed. Then – look out, HypnoDogs!
But she’ll make sure to take her time about coming to your rescue so that it doesn’t look like she came because you called.
Correction to ad:
I had four kittens, but basement cat in disguise (pictured) eated them.
There is a picture of mama kitty…but I didn’t include it….I think basement cat mebbe eated her too.
I do have a paradactyls, but they must go together to new home. One is OCD, and I am afraid it will kill me in my sleep if it doesn’t have its friend to help calm it.
I also have one sock that needs a good home, and a table with no lages. Please take it for free.
One sock? Is that an ad that I might have possibly missed?
Well, if there hasn’t there certainly will be.
I want to see an ad for a sock puppet with the picture just showing an average, un-decorated sock.
We saw that. It was the Papi thong ad, with the thong that looked like a sock, and on which I was afraid to click.
Nightmare, schmightmare. That kitten is rad.
(Now, velociraptors on hoverboards, that’s a whole ‘nother story.)
Hey, Meej, long time no see. How’s the mini-peep?
*waves* Hello all. I discovered YSaC a month or so ago and have been working my way through the archives since, laughing all the way. Love the site, love the comments and commenters, much love all around.
On-topic: I think Wizard of Oz would have scared a lot more children if there were flying Paradactyl kittens instead of flying monkeys.
Off-topic and my real reason for commenting: I went to the state fair this weekend and had two very YSaC moments that I wanted to share.
There was a tiger exhibit and an elephant exhibit right next to each other, where they had a couple of daily shows but the animals were available for viewing all day. My boyfriend and I were sitting on the bleachers at the elephant exhibit, waiting for the show to start, when one of the tigers came out of their main cage and started walking around the larger show cage. The man next to me, surrounded by several of his children, shouts, “OH MY GOD, LOOK AT THE LION!” It was all I could do not to look at him and yell back, “NOT.A.LION!” I just laughed hysterically for about ten minutes instead.
I saw several llamas at the fair, and often thought of our dear Llamanun, but never as much as when I saw this display. I had to take a photo on my crappy camera phone to share with you all. http://yfrog.com/9fllamasnj
I’m going to head back to my place in the archives now. I’ll be caught up to present day soon enough. Just thought I could share some of my giggles from the weekend. 🙂 Happy snarking!
Silver, welcome to the throng! Do stop in every morning to say hi before attending to the archives. After all, they’ll still be there. 8)
I read throng as thong. It was much more hilarious then.
I’d make some comment about that being because you are a teenage boy, but around here, well, it’s not just you….
Well, true, but if I don’t catch up on the archives, I’ll miss all the good inside jokes. 🙂 And thanks for welcoming me to the thong! Hee.
It’s a Taco Thong! Only partially used.
SilverDragon, thank you so much for de-lurking and introducing yourself, and sharing your YSaC moments with us!
I love the photo! Llamas are, indeed, magical. There’s really no other explanation for them.
Also, fuzzy and huggable!
Thanks! I think I was most amused by the fact that it was a black (and white) llama with a blue halter advertising their magical qualities. It was almost as if it was A Sign from The Llamanun herself!
And the “lion” guy just killed me. Way to raise another whole generation of people who can’t tell the difference, Sparky.
Mmmmm…Sammich.
Llamas can do magic tricks – without opposable thumbs? Now, that’s talented!
That’s why they use magic, no opposable thumbs. QED.
Oh, and llama that is bad at magic = alpaca [G]
But how do they hold the wand without thumbs? *worried face*
Like llamamagicks would need anything so banal or muggleish as a wand.
As if!
You’ll have to confirm this with Astro, but I’m pretty sure that when Ron’s hands were tied up, Hermione would hold his wand for him.
What?
That’s the most disturbing innuendo I’ve ever seen Bianchi….I can’t get it out of my head now….arrgghhh curse you…..
Speaking of innuendo, shouldn’t there be a tag for that?
Then ninety percent of the comments would require tags.
So, maybe there should be a tag for comments that don’t contain innuendo, instead?
I mean, you’ve gotta know it’s not intended to be there. Otherwise, you could spend all night looking for that special something.
Meej, I hope it doesn’t take all night to find that special something! 😉
You might want to invest in a flashlight if it takes that long, Meej.
I think Rowley already established that wands are not necessary when it’s convenient for the plot.
Similarly, wands are only completely necessary when it builds tension that leads to additional plot.
Captain, thank you for using that word. My English teacher told me that the only place I will ever see the word banal is in my vocabulary books.
And Bianchi, ummm… wow. All I cans say to that is this: Rule 34 states that Hermione’s not the only one doing that.
Hi SilverDragon! Please do pop in often. It takes a while to get through the archives, but nothing beats fresh snark!
Stale Snark is not as appetizing as fresh snark, just like coffee slices are so much better when freshly baked.
But the great thing about Snark is that it never really goes bad. It might not be quite as satisfying to read old Snark in which one cannot participate, but it’s still pretty good.
If coffee can be sliced, and we all like sammiches, could you make a coffee sammich?
NMN, I like the way you think.
Thanks! I think I’m up into the 600s now. It beats actually doing work, haha.
I don’t know, SD, those flying monkeys had me pretty terrified. I’m not sure anything would be worse than them.
How about Football Players hiding in your closet at night*?
*Both this and flying monkeys were irrational childhood fears held by my aunt.
“…Recently discovered in a remote area of the Amazon normally reserved for mislabeled packages, paradactyl kittens make their nests in the support trusses. Much like certain reptiles and breeds of fish, the paradactyl kitten is able to change the colour of its fur to match its surroundings and blend almost to perfection. Unlike its ninja-like peers however, and even more unusual, is that it builds its nest out of its own fur, perfectly coloured to also match its surroundings, thus camouflaging both itself and its nest, making them almost impossible to spot when at rest.
In fact, they were only discovered when a package containing a thermal imager fell from an overhead conveyor and broke open on the ground. Warehouse staff immediately began to fiddle with the device, and it was then that they found an unusual heat signature high above. After calling both California gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger and former Minnesota gov. Jesse Ventura and being told it was just a movie and to never call them again, they called their local animal control, who then called cryptozoologists in an attempt to explain these strange creatures. For their part, the cryptozoologists threw up their hands in befuddlement and began taking infrared pictures to make lolcatbirds out of. That is when we were called to investigate…”
For their part, the cryptozoologists threw up their hands
I read this as “threw up in their hands.”
Also quite possible. Especially if no one has changed the cryptocatlitter in a while.
Petrified cryptocatlitter logs from prehistoric paradactyl kittens. That explains everything!
Mindfield — was that in the “Amazon” or “the Amazon” amazon.com. One could be more profitable.
Can I trade a cryptokitty for a Kindle?
What’s your cryptocatulator tell you the current exchange rate is for cryptokitty-to-Kindle transactions?
That depends on if you have to use a Yeti as a go-between in the transaction. (They always want a ten-percent cut of things, and that always adds at least ten killer goldfish to the equation.)
Let’s see…
Picks up random catulator, installs kibble.
I’m getting… 867.5309. Wait a second.
Checks catulator collar.
Did someone lose a catulator named Jenny?
*PA voice*
“Paging Mr. Tutone, we have your cat; Mr. Tutone, your cat has been found. Please come to the service desk.”
Yes, but, if the kindle starts chasing balls of yarn or purring loudly, use a different pizza vendor.
The mother cat has red eyes; I think she might actually be part dinosaur (I know, pterodactyls aren’t dinosaurs).
Since the Cap’n isn’t here yet, I’ll corey this with some help from the great Wikipedia.
[eyeshine corey] The tapetum lucidum (Latin: “bright tapestry”, plural tapeta lucida) is a layer of tissue in the eye of many vertebrate animals, that lies immediately behind or sometimes within the retina. It reflects visible light back through the retina, increasing the light available to the photoreceptors. This improves vision in low-light conditions, but can cause the perceived image to be blurry from the interference of the reflected light. The tapetum lucidum contributes to the superior night vision of some animals. Many of these animals are nocturnal, especially carnivores that hunt their prey at night, while others are deep sea animals. Although strepsirrhine primates have a tapetum lucidum, humans and other haplorhine primates do not.[/eyeshine corey]
I think we need to lobby Mother Nature to get ours back. Talk about unfair.
But knowing Mother Nature, we might lose our thumbs if we got it back.
Or grow a horn.
I’ve always secretly wanted a horn though, so I would stop losing my ponytail holders.
Would the horn be like this:
http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.wyrdwizard.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/unicorn-horn.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.wyrdwizard.com/%3Fcat%3D8&usg=__RKMvqgOC06WuYospVkTHHtPHKTQ=&h=887&w=2305&sz=754&hl=en&start=0&zoom=1&tbnid=l2beFPn5EWeg7M:&tbnh=70&tbnw=183&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dunicorn%2Bhorn%26hl%3Den%26biw%3D1020%26bih%3D595%26gbv%3D2%26tbs%3Disch:1&itbs=1&iact=rc&dur=198&ei=I8l7TLXOFYH68AaG1p3vBQ&oei=I8l7TLXOFYH68AaG1p3vBQ&esq=1&page=1&ndsp=16&ved=1t:429,r:1,s:0&tx=53&ty=18
Wow thats big, sorry. Or would you have two horns, like this:
http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://listsoplenty.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/minotaur.jpg&imgrefurl=http://listsoplenty.com/blog/archives/558&usg=__HKnb24WeA8nDem3E3THNtkHvm9U=&h=600&w=631&sz=57&hl=en&start=0&zoom=1&tbnid=X52nVWQqNTqo2M:&tbnh=131&tbnw=135&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dminotaur%26hl%3Den%26biw%3D1020%26bih%3D595%26gbv%3D2%26tbs%3Disch:1&itbs=1&iact=hc&vpx=428&vpy=97&dur=1481&hovh=219&hovw=230&tx=65&ty=135&ei=b8l7TJ2YBMH98Aank-HlBQ&oei=b8l7TJ2YBMH98Aank-HlBQ&esq=1&page=1&ndsp=18&ved=1t:429,r:2,s:0
What the heck is with the huge links?
Well you know what they say: “Mother Nature likes it rough.*”
* I actually made a T-shirt for a CON with this quote on it. Below the quote was a picture of the Earth with a giant hurricane on it and a nuclear mushroom cloud blowing out of the center of it. All the Sci-Fi-ers and post apocalyptic people loved it, all the fantasy and greenies HATED it and called me names (As well as being told I was a horrible person who should die in a nuclear blast).
I consider drawing such reactions a complete success of the shirt.
EDIT: ARRRGGGGGHHHH Super Massive* links!
*Yay physics!
NMN:
[helpful corey] What you need is:
<a href=”link”>Text to show as link</a>
Example:
<a href=”http://www.google.com”>The internet is for porn</a>
Becomes:
The internet is for porn
[/corey]
I’m surprised didn’t say anything about NMN having a More Massive Link™ than you, Taco! Or are you confident enough in you linkulinity to not have to lay it out on the table and measure?
I did actually. See my comment just below his. I edited it to include a reference to his massive links.
Well, yes, but you didn’t seem threatened by his Super Massive Links, just exclamatory.
The opportunity to make a physics joke trumps my desire to affect faux indignation.
Unfortunately, EB, you just made “More Massive Link” sound like innuendo.
There could be a reason for that.
As if we would EVER stoop to using innuendo on this site. We’re all members of an upright community here, and the use of such crass innuendo would certainly shrink our credibility.
Ha, “upright” and “shrink” is more innuendo. I think. Maybe my mind is stuck in the gutter.
Not yet. But we’ll get it there eventually.
[matt] [/matt]
You dropped these, Taco.
C’mon down in the gutter with the rest of us, NMN. We have cookies!
You missed “members.” 😉
Hmm…free cookies are tough to pass up…will there be milk?
Sure! You can get some from that nice fella in the van down by the river. The one with “Free Candy” painted on the side.
Watch out for the “special” brownies, though. Those are from the housekeeper.
I thought Grampdaddy’s van got impounded?
And Not My Name, that is the most massivest, gihugic link that I ever did see.
Bravo, SJ.
Though, I might have asked how dim a sparky has to be to not notice the “remove red eye” feature on almost all photo editors (even on the dinky editor on the disc Walgreens will print your analog photos upon).
I want to remember that the color “frequency” the lucidim reflects changes with a cat’s age, nuch as the irises also subtly change.
But, that is pure recolection. [cannot resist:]On reflection, that last is [g]
[more eyeshine corey]Like any iridescence the tapetum lucidum can change color depending on the color and angle of the light source, as well as the species of animal(cats are normally yellow, horses are usually blue, etc.)and it’s age.
None of the red eye editors I’ve used work on cats, the editors remove the red (an area that is normally in the person’s pupil) by filling it in with black. Since eyeshine affects the entire eye and obscures the animal’s actual eye color, using one would turn Mama Kitty into an empty-eyed soul-devouring she-beast.[/more eyeshine corey]
Umm… Like all cats? And ex-wives?
One of the big draws for me at science fiction conventions is the Art Show. Of course, you have to deal with lots of slash art and popular subjects, but some very good stuff shows up. I buy whenever I can. A very talented artist portrays a winged kitten hanging around with a little winged dragon. I expect today’s art by dan would be the next logical step in that relationship!
I know which artist you’re talking about and I have a few of her non-kitten dragon paintings.
You know what I find strangest about slash art from what I’ve seen in the recent uploads on DeviantArt? Most of it appears to be made not by gay males, but by straight fan girls.
Yaoi is far more popular with straight female readers than with gay male readers. I suspect it is for the same reason that most lesbian pron (and Yuri) is wildly popular with straight males.
KittyDactyl, my old nemesis has returned!
“Quick Beluga boy wonder, to the shark cave, we must prepare the SharkMobile for battle. There’s not a moment to lose!”
“Holy Catwings KittyShark”
No offense, but your avatar is going to give me nightmares now.
I have a cat that closely resembles KittyShark, the resemblance is enhanced at three in the morning when I’m not wearing my glasses and I wake from a sound sleep to find said cat is compressing my ribcage and chooses that moment to yawn in my face.
Likely not with anything so pleasant as day-old tuna breath, either, cats being the way they are.
I never thought I’d be so happy to see KittyShark again! That mama kitty scares the crap out of me. She looks like she needs an exorcism. “The power of KittyShark compels you!”
I think KittyDactyl would win. KittyDactyl can go in the air and on land, whereas you, KittyShark, must stay in the water in order to live.
KittyShark has SCOOWBA (Self Contained Out Of Water Breathing Apparatus)
It makes KittyShark sound funny though, SCOOWBA DOOBY DOO!!!
Mama kitty is either possessed by a Goa’uld (oh dear, Stargate fan uncloaking) or saying “No, Mr Bond – I expect you to die.” Possibly both.
Dr. No’s cat has been possessed by his evil spirit, and is looking to kill Agent 007 (whichever incarnation of him is working at the moment).
He can have Dalton, but he’d better keep his poly-paw-claws off my Brosnan and Connery.
Always wondered what would happen if a Replicator was taken by a Goa’uld.
Presumably, chaos would ensue. Or hilarity.
Your rat looks a little possessed, with those glowing red eyes, ya’ know.
Oops, rumbled.
Grammatically speaking, shouldn’t there be a question mark after the phrase “which 3 of them have many toes”? It’s a trick question anyway, since we don’t know any of the four kittens’ names.
This is getting dangerously close to the road to Saint Ives.
Well, and Sparq’s comment is under-informing, as I expect all kittens to have many toes (in the neighborhood of 18, typically).
Monoungulate or diungulate kittens would be very perverse (the potential toenails equally so). Enough to make decaungulate ot duodecaunglate kittens seem nearly humdrum.
I think Cat Math has taken on a very evil twist. That has to be the most pissed off catulator I have ever seen. Hybrid many-toed kittensaurus catulators? No thank you!
Kittensaurus Catulator gets my early vote for band name du jour.
I say it should be:
Pterodactular Kittens*
*Yes, I know Pterodactular isn’t a real word.
It is now!
Not anti-establishment enough–needs to be just
ptërdacülar!
(and the exclamation point and umlauts would be mandatory)
Which would allow them to express their angst in one-chord powermetal on the inequity of life and how property is theft (except of the stuff in the band’s van and all).
Throw in a couple of apostrophes and a hyphen as well.
No, they’d be too hip for ordinary punctucation.
Would not fit with their anarcho-syndicalist views.
How about pŧër˞đĂċülĂr‽ then? Suitably anarchist?
I’m not even going to attempt to pronounce that.
I’m fairly positive the pronounciation is not within human physical capabilities.
I tried to pronounce it, and it sounded like I was doing a bad impression of Stitch, from the Disney Movie Lilo & Stitch*
*Once you click that link, all I can say is I just learned how and couldn’t resist trying it out.
Paradactyl Kittens
*Anagram fun*
Kelt Pastry Antacid (Ewwww, fish pie flavored Tums)
Tardy Placenta Skit (A play about late afterbirth? Ewwww)
Ancestral Kitty Pad (A place where Austin Power’s pets forefathers live?)
Dinky Lactate Parts (“A” cup?)
Kindly Castrate Tap (Poor Tap)
Plastic Art Tan Dyke (painting of a fake beige beard?)
Poor Tap, indeed. The words “kindly” and “castrate” are oxymorons.
Water, actually on screen – thank you HamCan!
(It was “Dinky Lactate Parts” that acted as snerf catalyst.)
A Tartan Tickled Spy
Poor guy, I hate being tickled.
Tardy Skirt Placenta — would that be lint?
Castrate Tap Kindly — either a serious Shao-lin move; or an assist for a futture Darwin Award runner-up?
KY Can’t Plate Tardis.
Then how will the Doctor squeeze it into a black hole?
*I’ve put myself in the corner*
BWAHAHAHAHA!!
Dan’s kittendactyl has frightened my coworker, and it’s not even noon yet on Monday! Good job, YSAC!
Our work here is done!
So we have dinosaur kitten, and Egyptian lizard.
http://www.yousuckatcraigslist.com/?p=2737
So I think I really want a paradactyl kitten… Am I the only one that thinks that could be awesome? Though I’d want it to have a more kitteny body, for tummy scratches.
That would be a slice of awesome, but my babies already want attention constantly. Giving them the ability to dive bomb me while I eat would be too much.
Bad as house cats merged with sugar glider or foxbat (an idea advanced by someone more sparkly than swift).
Imagine the havoc of kittens able to climb to high places and then glide (deliberately) across the room.
Come on now, I can’t be the only one who thinks that Satan’s minion kitty is adorable.
Also, like duh, everyone knows those are called polygonal cats. Sheesh!
But I thought polygonal cats had six legs! I’m so confused now.
You’re thinking of Octagonal cats.
Aren’t those called Ocelots?
The hepcats wear fedoras, right?
I thought we decided it was fezes? (fezzes… fezs… fezsplt… fezzi… eh, I give up.)
No, fez are for Morroccans; shriners; & the uniquely-cultured.
Sometimes, sadly, some use their own fannies in this manner. Even when said posterior has not the slightest resemblance to a semi-conical hat.
You are not the only one that Satan’s LapKitty appeals to, christina. She appears to have a good deal of Tonk or perhaps Siamese in her.
I thought Tonks married Lupin! Or are you saying she had an affair with Siamese twins? 🙂
Alas, young Teddy Lupin has proved himself a metamorphmagus, meaning he could transform into the Devil’s Lap Kitteh.
Sorry to burst everyone’s snark bubble (especially since I’m a regular lurker but almost never post), but paradactyl cats are real – they have one or more extra toes as the result of a recessive gene mutation.
Aside from missing an “of” before the “which,” this person does not really suck at Craigslist at all.
[corey] Sorry to burst your bubble, but they’re called Polydactyl, not Paradactyl. Paradactyl is a common misspelling of Polydactyl that has become mainstream.[/corey]
Poly – Multiple Dactyl – Digits
Technically Para would work as it’s meaning is beside or alongside of, however it was not used until Polydactyl was already established as the condition.
Taco! Again with the head and the you and the in!
[corey] From the Greek “poly,” meaning many (as in polygon or polygamy) and the Greek “dactyl,” meaning finger or toe (as in dactylic hexameter or pterodactyl). “Para,” also from the Greek, generally means “at or to one side of” (as in parallel) or “objects or activities auxiliary to or derivative of that denoted by the base word” (as in parody). [/corey] I’ve seen the famous polydactyl cats at the Hemingway house in Key West, and they do indeed have many toes, more than the usual amount.
“Paradactyl,” as far as I can tell, isn’t a word at all, and if it were, it would describe something with fingers or toes on its side, which is almost as creepy as that kitten with the shark teeth.
Oh, and Taco, you edited your comment while I was writing mine, rendering mine redundant, dammit! (Either that or I fail reading comprehension.)
I did indeed add the extra info in an edit. But I still beat your post with the edit =p.
Well, there is also the sense of “para” is in “not quite” too.
Would not a paradactyl cat have stray non-toes as a result? Wing stubs? Pincers? Cillia?
A cat with Cillia is a singularly disturbing mental image.
I’m pretty sure there is some Tentacle Hentai out there somewhere that makes this a horrible reality.
I’ve seen other examples of kitties with cillia but here’s a Hello CthulhuKitty for you.
Take
That
Image
Out
Of
My
Head
NOW.
I don’t know if I should click on that link or not Moira…..I’m scared.
That’s way more disturbing than the Crochet’d Hello Cthulhu doll somebody made using this pattern.
And here is the picture I was actually looking for. It’s cute and fuzzy and wants your soul.
Damnit people. You got me looking at amigurumi patterns again. I’ve found all kinds of patterns I need to make, and a bunch more (too many to list) that I want to buy and make.
Stop making me want to crochet!
*Sighs and goes to get his hooks and yarn*
I blame all of you for everyone in my family getting crocheted gifts for Holiday this year. *Grumbles to himself*
I think you secretly like referring to yourself as a hooker.
**sobs**
It’s stepping all over Depressy’s and my territory.
I’m cute and fuzzy, and Depressey wants your soul!
But now… this! This… Davey Jones’s Kitten!
**winks at TacoMagic.**
Next someone will be muscling in on your massive link!
**looks at a certain post above this one, bursts into tears**
We’re being outmoded!
Ohhh I get it now. If “Para” = Pair, and “Dactyl” = Digit, then this person is trying to sell a pair of digital kittens. It makes so much sense now.
So Sarajean and Bianchi are for sale?
SWEET!
Except they’re actually called polydactyl. 🙂
So…..Paradactyl kittens are cat/pterodactyl hybrids with extra toes? I’m sorry Jon, but it is necessary to keep the snarking up, even if the post actually makes sense.
Methinks Jon missed [matt] tags.
Jon, I think you forgot your [corey] tags.
And then there’s the fact that the ones you are thinking of are called polydactyl, so the ad rather does suck for getting it wrong.
However, please continue to be delurked – and keep commenting! We like new commenters. : )
Later edit: Hey, look at us all coreying up the place!
I’ve been afraid to ask this, but….why do you all say corey, or matt? Who the heck are (or were) Corey, and Matt? I’m so confused.
There might be an explaination with links in the forum, but here’s the gist of it.
One day there was a car ad, where the guy kept talking about “da minty shell.” There was snark and good times were rolling, and a commenter named Corey came out and told us we were all wrong, and that “da” is a designation for the type of car body… or something along those lines. But we thought it was still funny, because he said “da” instead of “the” in other places, too… But Corey wouldn’t let it go, including linking to his previous comments about the car’s shell. So, any time someone brings these weird things called “facts” into the conversation, we add [Corey] to keep the snark going 🙂
Search on “da minty shell” for your intro to Corey.
Edit: D’oh… I’m late to the party.
Oh, right, and Matt. I don’t remember the specific thing that was going on with Matt… But basically, I think we inadvertently insulted someone/something, and so he jumped in with righteous indignation. So, [Matt] tags are for “righteous indignation,” or something like it. Usually the Corey tags are actual factual information bits, and Matt tags used in a snarkalicious way.
EB’s pretty much got it. corey tags are used to inform everyone that we’re about to spew non-snarky facts at everyone. Matt tags are used more when we want to be funny and snarkily pretend that we are righteously indignant about something (usually in mocking defense of the poster).
Oh ok, thanks.
Oh, and we originally tried to use the < and >, but the XHTML in the comments interpreted those as tags, so we use the square brackets. 🙂 (Do we have a thing in the forum to initiate new commenters to things like this. Like… A YSaC primer or something?)
Not – someone
with more time on their handsmuch quicker than I can point you to the posts, but in abedazzled hoofnutshell….Corey – this was a person who was trying, desperately, to explain to us that the wording in a CL ad about a car with a “da minty shell” was really not suckage, and was in fact correct wording. It didn’t matter that we, the
evil minionsdenizens of YSaC politely explained to him the point of the site, he just kept explaining. Henceforth, any real explanation of a YSaC post is corey-ed.Matt – this was a person who got really pissed off over our poking fun at a CL ad one day…it was hilarious, and some of us think it may have been the person who wrote the original ad. Henceforth, all indignant – be it righteous or faux – posts written are matt-ed.
No need to cross out “evil minions.” Have you seen my avatar, and KittyShark’s….uhhh….KittyShark?
Can’t talk now, have KittyDactyl hairball stuck in my throat.
Turns out they are quite tasty, even if a bit fuzzy.
*GakGakGAk*
“Yo, Beluga boy…bring the hairball remedy and a mop please”
YSaC memes:
http://www.yousuckatcraigslist.com/?page_id=3282&vasthtmlaction=viewtopic&t=41.0
I was working on a YSaCtionary before I went to Paris…I should get back to that. It has Corey and Matt definitions…among other things.
We should have a wiki :-p
Yes, a wiki would be awesome. Then I could just put in the definitions I have, and the words that are still lacking definitions, and people could update and edit.
I believe Matt was indignant because he figured the day’s Sparky was a non-native English speaker, and thought us cruel and mean-spirited for making fun of him.
If I recall correctly, Matt showed up on the whit nestor tanks post.
In other news, All Tech Considered was about memes today.
[corey] YSaC Vol. 420 covers a ton of info about corey, matt, html, brackets of all kinds, as well as other vital YSaC tidbits. I learned a boatload of stuff that day!
[/corey]
Drat! Dreadful redbar got me!
I’m pretty sure you meant 720, abwh, unless you’re just trying to keep Saturday’s party going. 😉
[g]!
In support of the growing YSaC Canine Mafia, I have changed my ears to fox ears.
Are you implying that this place is going to the dogs?
Hey, I recognize that puppy. Didn’t he have a different name a little while back, though?
Moira – I’m a long time YSaC lurker and admirer of Lola’s avatar, but these are my first posts. You must have confused my unique doggie likeness for someone else.
Whoops, sorry J-dog, I thought you were one of Ham’s blue merles. My earlier puppey-gush still stands though, that is one beautiful dog!
Why yes it is!
Oh, and…Wookit da cute liddle doggie! Aw…him so fwuffy and smooshable!
Curse you and your snark-eliminating puppies, HamCan!
I’m never on here anymore, I just lurk around, but I couldn’t resist joining the YSaC Canine Mafia. Say “Hi” to Vinnie and Paulie.
A mere “hi” is not sufficient. Cuddles and scritchies are stongly indicated!
Please post once in a while, jg. I miss your puppeh avatars!*
*This is a snark-free statement.**
**Really. I think Vinnie and Paulie*** are irresistably cute.
***I suspect that these are not their real names …
Who’s a cute widdle J-dog? Yes, yes you are!
Just because I own only a cat it doesn’t mean I don’t like puppies. Puppies!
{Pssst! There’s a thread in the forum about nickname origins… I’m curious!}
I have added my story to your thread EB. Enjoy the mundanity.
Mine too…it’s even more mundane than Taco’s.
I can save everyone the suspense – mine’s my name and the year I was born.
Yup. I’m that creative.
This is my third comment, and I’m using it to say that my boring story is there too.
*goes back to lurking*
Frog DNA is definitely out.
I demand chicken!
Or a nice BLT…
Bologna, lutefisk, and tuna!
Mmmm, my favorite!
Beetle, lettuce and tomato… I AM a gecko after all.
Wonder if Sparky really meant a “Pair of ductile kittens”
Because I found a buyer…
http://www.ding.net/bonsaikitten/bkmethod.html
**stares at Bonsai Kitten page**
WHAT. THE. FUDGE.
That HAS to be a joke. I’m calling PETA.
Check out the names of the writers, etc., on the guestbook page. Seems pretty hoax-y, as does the fact that there are only two supposed pictures of the bonsai cats and they are … not terribly convincing. Also – most of the guestbook entries are about ten years old.
[corey]The Bonsai Kitty hoax was born around the same year Astro was, or soon after, and to this day there are still organizations *cough*PETA*cough* who believe it is real and get righteously indignent over it.[/corey]
In that case, I’m still calling PETA just to get them riled up.
OT: Just got an awsome fortune cookie, if only because it’s a perfect example of “in bed” usage.
“You have man personal talents that are attractive to others, so be sure to use them.”
Oh yes, suggestive cookie pay off!
*blink* Is that a typo, or does the first half of the fortune not make sense?
Also, 😉
I think I spot a missing y, but I don’t know if that’s the cookie or just Taco.
Doh, yes it should have been “many.”
Spell check doesn’t fix lazy.
I need a
t-shitt-shirt with that on it.But can it fix being attacked by zomb
I second EB’s wink and raise by a “rawr.”
I have man personal talents!
Bianchi, that’s even funnier coming from your cat avatar. Especially because he reminds me a lot of my parents’ cat.
*Waves at Bianchi*
Darn about the spell-check/lazy, I was hoping for an explanation of “man personal talents.”
I wouldn’t ask for an explanation of “man personal talents” from this bunch. That’s a sure recipe for multiple line crossings.
Would guess, from previous comments, would encompass grooming and bathing in a responsible manner.
I figured that was why it went so well with the “in bed” at the end.
That was my thought too, Meej.
I didn’t know women were okay with men exercising their personal talents in bed.
Another work-related OT… (Hey, I figure as long as I’m spending all this time here during work, I might as well pick some more clever brains than mine for project stuff :-))
So, I work for an online education company. We call the container for our information (including styles, the way information and pages organized, the code that grades exercises and tests, our games, etc.) “Dais” (it used to be just “the platform” [which isn’t really a platform, but that’s another story] but it was decided that it needed a name). (Holy Hannah, that’s a lot of parenthetical information!) One of the things I’m working on is replacing our current content development tools with an online tool that allows people to view, add, edit, and organize content… And I need to come up with a better name than “CMS” (that’s what we call our current Content Management System). I want to have something quick and catchy-ish, that relates to “Dais”… like something that means “little platform” or “pre platform” or “staging area.” (I thought about Stage, but we already have a “staging server” so that might be confusing.) This is totally internal, so puns and wordplay are welcome, but it does have to pass by the COO and Development Manager. (The CEO and COO rejected our previous Disney-themed computer naming scheme when they bought the company, and the DM doesn’t have much of a sense of humor.) You guys are clever, want to help me out? 😀
Theater (or Theatre)?
I submit belvedere.
It’s a synonym for platform.
I like belvedere too. Or rostrum.
A vote for Rostrum.
Conditor would be latin for composer.
I vote for Mr. Belvedere!
Pedestal (serious one)
Content Relational Adjustable Planning (Not so serious, CRAP)
Ooh, I like CRAP.
(The acronym, not in a coprophagic way…I’ll just shut up now.)
I vote for Amphitheater. It’s like SaraJean’s but sounds a bit fancier.
Plus if you choose Amphitheater, you can shorten it to Amp.
Or Amphitheatre, if you want to sound fancy and British.
Teehee, and then we can shorten it to “Amph” and it sounds like we’re talking about drugs :-p
How about Random Tools That Just Might Enable User To Take Over
The Known Universe?
You can call it “BOB” for short.
You’re welcome.
Orrrrrrr…..”Wedge”…as in platform shoes…as in smaller than a platform…as in runnin’ outta steam here…..
Amphora
If anyone asks, it’s the container, and comes in various shapes and sizes. Or we can just claim it’s only about the retsina.
If you don’t want to stay strictly with variaous platform-related synonyms, you can branch out into some theater-related terminology that fits with the function of this tool.
Like hotspot or Cue-to-Cue (Q2Q).
I love the Q2Q! It’s easy to say, too… “Have you made the changes on Q2Q yet?” I wonder if I can get everyone else to use it 🙂
P.S. Thanks for helping me think this one out, everyone! You guys are awesomesauce 🙂
Awesomesauce is an awesomesauce word to use. Awesomesauce! Awesomesauce! Awesomesauce!
It’s just like Spice Christ.
Or Sweet Hot-Sauce Moses.
Both of which are very fun to shout, by the way.
I’d like to add that “Sweet Hot-Sauce Moses” is particularly fun when shouted in a thick southern accent.
Astro, I believe that Sweet Hot-Sauce Moses, if truly Kosher, is awesomeschmaltz (in the dietary sense of the word schmaltz). 😉
I’m adding Sweet Hot Sauce Moses to my list of niece-friendly curse words.
Lectern? Teatro? Proskene? [corey] Proskene is the greek word. Theatre people will recognize it as proscenium. The frame for the stage, usually an arch. [/corey]
To wander off of the platform idea, I submit “ekkyklema.” It’s a cart they used in ancient Greek theatre to bring new set pieces onstage. Also to reveal dead bodies, as it would be uncouth to actually KILL people onstage.
*snark snark snark*
I’m so late today! I had to take my mom to the airport this morning, and then I had a legal temp agency “interview”, which was really just, “well, here’s how it works, we’ll call you if something comes up.” She was nice though, and seemed optimistic about the prospects and said I have a good resume. So, we’ll see. It’s something.
Anyway. Mr. Brazil and I are going to enjoy the last week of pool usage now. I might snark via iPhone while out there, but you all know how it is with the mobile site and the nesting comments.
Did one of those, myself, about a month ago. Phone is not ringing, and it is they (to abuse Mr Buffett’s lyrics no end).
I hate cats
They’re better deep fried and smothered in cheese.
I marinade mine in Teriyaki sauce and then grill them on a mesquite plank.
I bet that pairs nicely with a fermented yak’s* milk.
*Do you have any idea how hard it is to find a fermented yak?
I throw mine in with the lobsters, nothing like a little surf N manx…
The hard part is getting all the fur off.
You have to boil them first, SJ, then the fur comes right off.*
*So I hear.**
**Actually, I heard that about guinea pigs, but, you know…
Today we have crossed an entirely different line than normal.
Cheers. *Raises a glass of boiled cat skin*
Cat Steamins
And the cat’s on the gridle and it’ll be sizzlin’ soon
Little boy chewed and the man got the wishbone
When’s Mittens comin’ home dad?
I don’t know when, but we’ll have a BBQ then son
You know we’ll have the grill on then
I eat their livers with some fava beans and a nice chianti.
Eep!
**goes to hide his Guinea Pigs from all the people here**
I don’t know why you are all talking about eating cats, but so long as you don’t start talking about eating dogs, I’m fine with this. Carry on.
I take it you’re not from Vietnam?
No, no I’m not.
Don’t worry NMN, dogs aren’t in season (or seasoning) until late October.
[corey]While I have no authority on whether or not Vietnamese eat dog, I’ve been told that no one eats cat mainly because the meat in greasy, stringy and tough. I do know that Indonesians raise certain small breeds of dog as livestock and apparently they taste like goat. However, like goats raised to be food, the dogs must be kept from eating anything that will taint their flavor. And people wonder why I’m vegetarian.[/corey]
Everything is tender if you make it into burgers.
I’ll have Double McTabby with cheese please!
300 COMMENTS! Thank Spice Christ Clothespin Jeebuz that I am not doing a Round-Up today. Ow. Even.
So how was your first “normal” day, WR?
AR, it was DREADFUL! Heavier traffic at 8:00 than at 7:00, didn’t leave enough time, morning FLEW past, got some things done, but at 4:00 I had no one to cover the very busy lobby, so I went down and relieved my worker. We shooed the last client out at 5:35, and I didn’t get out until 6:00 instead of the promised 5:30. But I got to sleep in and I did get home earlier because I used to leave at 6:30 when I was off at 6:00. There are too few workers in at 7:00 am and too few after 5:00 pm. Total chaos. Tomorrow should be better, it’s the end of the month and crazy people will once again fill our lobby, but it’s not my day to cover.
Off Topic Preemie Baby Update!
For those of you who have been following along at home, great news on my friend’s baby boy. (Quick recap – baby boy was born at 26 weeks and has been fighting hard for the last month to pull through after starting life at barely 2 pounds.) The little man has made it up to 3 pounds, 5 ounces and is gaining at a rapid pace. Even better though, he is fully off the ventilator. He is breathing room air, on his own, with a steady heart rate and perfect oxygen levels. So thank you for the prayers and kind thoughts you sent their way!
Ok, back to the snark!
So nice to hear he’s doing well! Thank you for keeping us updated.
Thank you Manda! Wonderful news. A blessing on his head!
That’s really great news! Please do keep us up to date on his progress.
Yeah!!!
Penthaldarian, hope you stick around because you don’t suck! Here’s your card, now hold it steady. Punchity punch punch!
(320 comments? Are you people insane? Wait, don’t answer that.)
G’Night, Hogwarts!