YSaC, Vol. 776: Did King Arthur have these issues?
Round table with skirt 19” tall, 26” high with cloth – $5
Round table with skirt 19” tall, 26” high with cloth.
This is a nice round table with a navy cloth. I think the top is pressed wood. The legs are stained but don’t show with the cloth on. It is a good functional table.
OK, even ignoring the fact that this is the visual equivalent of Philip Glass Sells a Table, Amy, who sent this in, brings up the most important question: What kind of table cloth is seven inches tall?
Thanks, Amy!
It’s magic! Amazing! You change the tablecloth and it’s like you are in an entirely different room. I’ll take elebenty of those.
The table cloth comes with 25 square feet of hardwood floor attached.
What? Am I the only one who sees through this ruse? It’s obviously a magical levitating tablecloth, made from an old magic carpet. And apparently not a very good one, if it can only get 7″ off the ground.
I’ve been happy with 7″ for a long time now.
What? No, I didn’t see a line.
Wow, even Windy is crossing the line now. I think we should all be ashamed of ourselves for being such a naughty influence. I think it’s time for some spankings.
What?
Just remember, 7″ x (some number) = a much BIGGER number. It’s like catmath, only different. This may help explain it:
7″ over and over = 1 x happy kitty
See, Windy has been practicing her catmath multiplication facts!
Does anyone else have that Schoolhouse Rock* song about Lucky Number Seven stuck in their head now?
*My mom, in an attempt to teach her children about things, got us a big DVD with all the schoolhouse rock stuff on it.
**wanders off, whistling “I’m Just a Bill”.**
Windrose, how I wish you’d do a weekday recap just because I really want to see your outsider’s view on your adore-deserving comment above.
Wicked cool!
Kae’s “Wicked cool!” has, every time I’ve looked, been just below a different reply to Windrose’s comment above (because of the not-nesting thing, and the fact that it’s a reply to the same comment.)
And yet, misread as a reply to *any* of the comments in that chain, it’s both hilarious and completely different in emphasis. Try it!
It was….9 feet high and 6 feet wide, soft as a downy chick..
It was….made from the feathers of fortyleben geese, took a whole bolt of blue cloth for the tick…
It’d hold 8 kids, and 4 hound dogs, and a pig we stole from the shed…
Didn’t get much to eat, but we had a lotta fun on Grandma’s 19 inch tall, 26 inch high, squared table-bed!
CJ, I just KNOW the Muppets’ version of this is destined to my my earbug today!
Heh..heh…must admit to being a closet Denver fan…
psssst….me too, but don’t tell.
From your mouth to God’s ears … I go into the drugstore at lunch today and the in-store selection is “Rocky Mountain High.”
I paid and left.
The movie Final Destination has ruined John Denver songs for me.
“From your mouth to God’s ears … I go into the drugstore at lunch today and the in-store selection is “Rocky Mountain High.””
Cue Twilight Zone theme….
I entered the restaurant to the strains of “Calypso”, which is by the way, one of my absolute favs.
It’s getting weird in here……..
I love (some of) his music but, seriously, who thought it was a good idea to put a shirtless picture of him on an album cover?
What makes it a navy cloth, the semen stains?
……..and….4 comments in…we have a winner!!!
Line…gone, obliterated, rubbed-out, decimated…
Fourth comment…line vanished.
Edit: Damnit, CJ, just because you’re in an earlier time zone, quit showing off!
2nd Edit: And, amazingly, the line-vanquishing comment was not made by HamCan. Astounding!
3rd Edit: Can you tell I’m up early this morning? And I’ve had three slices of coffee? Wheee!
Archie – it’s not the earlier time zone, it’s the fact that I get to work when most of the world is still a-snoozin’. 🙂
Hey, did you happen to bring any muffins to go along with my sliced coffee? Thanksabunch!
No muffins, but help yourself to a slice of apple pie or peach cobbler. ALL the fruit on the Eyebrow ranch ripened at the same time so I was busy all weekend pickin’ and cannin’ and bakin’. Good thing Daughters #2 and #3 and friends were over for a visit.
[fruitcorey]For many years there was a large and prolific peach tree in the yard of the home directly behind me. The owners were a retired couple left to raise their two granddaughters when their daughter was sent to prison. They didn’t mind my picking peaches so long as I shared the cobblers I made. About 10 years ago, they moved so I got to keep all the cobbler to myself. 🙂 About 5 years ago, new owners took over the property, tore down the house and CHOPPED DOWN MY PEACH TREE!! Since then, no fresh cobbler…sigh…which is a looooooong way of saying…yes, I’ll take a heapin’ helpin’ of your peach cobbler, thank you.[/endfruitcorey]
If you pour just a wee bit of one of those flavored creamers over the top (french vanilla being a favorite), you will in fact swoon.
Is that because the creamer reacts with the ingredients and forms a rudimentary chloroform? Or is the cobbler just really good?
I’ve had to be careful about chloroform desserts ever since the ninjas started stalking me.
I have the last of my peaches. Warm peach crisp will be ready late this afternoon. Vanilla ice cream is optional. On to apples next…..
Nope, the cobbler is just that good. No chloroform involved.
OT today, but relatable to yesterday’s post. I must tell about the time (as a young bride) I made a fish dish recipe from a French cookbook. It tasted horrible, so horrible in fact that I put it outside the backdoor in disgust. The next morning, it was covered in earwigs. Dead earwigs. Lived in that house four years. Never another earwig. I always wished I could figure out what kind of concoction I had manufactured. Could have made a fortune selling it in the gardening section.
Wow Archie…I wish you could figure out what you’d done too. You could have made a fortune not just in gardening, but in pest control too.
This reminds me of a story about my Papaw.
My Papaw was the type who, when he cooks, he only thinks he needs similar ingredients. One day, he tried to make Fish au grautin. He did not have cheese or butter. My mom does not know what he put in it, but what she put in her mouth was Fish au rotten
Of all the days to show up late to the party! I missed out on line crossing, peach cobbler and chloroform! At least I had my coffee slices.
Astro: my mother always called potatoes au gratin, “potatoes are rotten.” She had a whole list of names like this, it’s a wonder I ever ate anything. Fish dicks was the only one that slipped over my head until about high school.
I used to hate earwigs. Then I found out they are carnivorous and love aphids. Now, I simply think they are about the ugliest bug I’ve ever seen. (Yes, that includes all the bug links we’ve had but not the arachnids. Arachnids are different.)
It’s nice to know Monica Lewinsky’s infamous dress has been recycled.
I was eating Manda…. yuck!!
You were eating Manda? I think her husband might have something to say about that…
*Comment about Manda’s husband wanting to watch deleted due to EXTREME line crossing*
*Edit: whoops*
I…ummm…yeah, if anyone needs me I’ll be soaking in the brain bleach jacuzzi.
Let this be a lesson to you all! Punctuation is essential. Without it, we have cannibalism. Or pr0n. Not that there’s anything wrong with cannibalism, of course. 😉
What about pron?
And having spent the morning reading about a woman who disposed of her husband in hydrochloric acid, “brain bleach jacuzzi” is squicking me out something serious today.
To answer that seriously, I have many and widely varying thoughts on pr0n. As a general concept I have no issue with it, although there may be specific types/genres that I find distasteful, no pun intended. That being said, if it isn’t illegal, it isn’t my place to judge what floats someone else’s boat. Live and let live.
You were eating Manda? I think her husband might have something to say about that…
OK. I spent all day with my 50 little cherubs – no….
OK. I spent all day with my 50 little angels – no….
OK. I spent all day with my 50 little 1st graders – no, still not right….
OK. I spent all day with my 50 little hellions…., and I come home to THIS on YSaC???
*here, little vodka – c’mon, right over here with the ice cubes….*
Grampdaddy, when you put your daughter all over the interwebs for people to
gawksnark at, you have to brace yourself for line crossing at her expense!That may have come out far stranger than I intended it.
Astro, I had nothing to do with her being all over the web.
I actually forbid her using the internet, ever, and she couldn’t date until she was 23, and she couldn’t watch “Sleeping Beauty” because the prince ended up in SB’s bedroom.* **
*She didn’t listen.
**None of this may be true.***
***Except the “She didn’t listen” part.
Dad, please pass the vodka.
See, I was listening. About the vodka anyway.
… Not a line to read when you’re eating a morning baguette filled with egg salad …
*hurk* Thanks Lola. I already woke up with a migraine, now I’m nauseous too.
Sorry – if it’s any comfort, I did the read-freeze mid-chew-stare at food-swallow uncomfortably-put down food thing when I read Is.An.Avatar’s comment …
Well, the migraine is better (thanks Zomig™!) but the nausea is not. Not because of your comment though, the medicine always makes me a bit nauseous. But that’s going away too. I just have to ignore all these nausea-inducing comments and I’ll be fine. 😉
Oh dear! What a mess I’ve made. My apologies to all for the pain my little spelling error caused. Of course I meant to type seamen …….
That’s one thick table cloth.
Anyone else scroll down expecting the table to grow?
Or is the heatwave getting to my brain?
I was expecting a magic trick.
Illusions, HamCan! A trick is something a whore does for money…
…or candy!
I would rather have a trick then an illusion…Makes me wonder what’s really under that skirt.
Candy? Mmmmmm!
If the line hadn’t already be obliterated, you two would have blown it into next week.
Hey, why is it that whores and strippers are always called Candy?
What?
There’s always money in the banana stand.
I’ve made a huge mistake.
Not necessarily, IF. I hear a shot of penicillin will clear that up in no time.
What?
Candy is dandy and liquor is quicker
but sex won’t rot your teeth.
It can if you’re doing it
wrongright.I think I’ll quote that one to the dentist the next time I go, J-Dog, and see what he says. Something tells me he won’t be putting it on promotional material, but I can’t quite guess why …
Me neither Lola, unless you’re doing “it” the way SaraJean does.
Btw, our avatars look good together – wink
If is were twelve hours earlier, 1358, not 0158, pointing out that the table legs under the skirt are stained might be line-challenging [sigh]
I was expecting the Spanish Inquisition.
Manda, you were not!
*Bursts into song with Mel Brooks*
The Inquistion (Let’s Begin)
The Inquisition (Look out sin)
We have a mission
To convert the Jew (Jew Jew Jew Jew Jew Jew Jew)
We’re gonna teach them (Wrong from right)
We’re gonna help them (See the light)
And make an offer that they can’t refuse.
(That the Jews just can’t refuse)
And HamCan has obliterated all past, present, and future lines with that one song.
Wasn’t my song!
Mel Brooks wrote it!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X5McSEU48Y8
Mel Brooks, or Mel Gibson? Because I’m thinking the latter.
If it was Mel Gibson there would be more (slurred) cuss words.
Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition! Break out the comfy chair…
Adding 7″ by throwing a cloth over it…intriguing line of thought.
Oh, did I say line?
Tent?
What? The line was already long gone!
And the puppy dogs of YSaC were chasing that line, snapping and biting at its’ heels.
Do lines have heels? If lines do indeed have heels, are they stiletto? or wedge? or platform? I know heels do not respect lines very often, if ever. One question answered. So many left to ponder.
Lines are for tug-O-war!
And doing the conga!
I’ve crossed, dropped, done (back in the 80’s mind you), drawn, stood in, been nearly electrocuted by, joined, written, tripped over, snagged by, cut, coloured outside and inside of; I’ve been a passenger on train, air, and ship versions, but I’ve never chased one.
@ BUJ, seems long time since you were seen here. Yay for you being back! Leave it to the line to draw you out.
I’ve been known to tow the line, but around here I just tip toe around the line.
Home work assignment for HamCan or any other YSaC bard!
(if this hasn’t been done that is)
Rewrite the following songs:
I Walk The Line
Hold The Line
White Lines
I did this one a while back, it’s in the song list on the forum.
I crossed the line by Johnny Crash
I keep a close watch on this snark of mine
I keep my mouth wide open all the time.
I keep the bleach out for the one that blinds
Because of your meme,
I crossed the line
I find it very, very easy to be rude
I want to be in the box when each day is through
Yes, I’ll admit Bob is a fool
Because of your meme,
I crossed the line
As sure as Taco has snark and Capn’ has it right
I’ll keep your mind on bleach both day and night
And weirdness I’ve known proves that it’s right
Because of your meme,
I crossed the line
You’ve got a way to keep me really snide
You give me cause for jokes I can abide
For you I know a hors I’d even ride
Because of your meme,
I crossed the line
I was thinking you had, but I wasn’t sure. Care to take a stab at the other two?
I’ll try, have not been to lyrical lately 😉
Oh, is Lyrical a nice place to visit? When was the last time you were there?
Oh yes, it is just down the road from Melodic. You can’t miss it, the poetic justice center is in the town square.
Isn’t the skirt attached to the cloth? So how can the table be 19″ with the skirt and 26″ with the cloth? Is it cat math? Is there a 7″ cat under the cloth?
That would be more of a kitten, wouldn’t it?
Or a very small lion.
Camille, would that not be not.a.lion
Hard to tell since we can’t actually see it in any of the eight photos.
[matt] The skirt is obviously the ruffle at the bottom of the cloth. When the table is feeling casual it removes the skirt, kicks off it’s seven-inch heels and strolls around looking for different doors to pose in front of.[/matt]
Sounds like Taco and his “sexy posing” before coffee. I’ll bet his infamous thong is under that skirt.
Isn’t that the thong that someone found in their ear? *shudder*
Oh right, Mudsy has the Taco Thong.
I think it’s related to that old standard, “With a Thong in My Heart” (1929, Rogers and Hart).
What about “With a smile and a thong…” (Snow White and the Seven Dwarves–another line all together)
Trying hard not to imagine what SilvaNoir’s rendition of a TacoThong might look like on a mousepad or coffee mug.
Eek.
I must share my mental image so you may all suffer.
Taco as a “dancer” (if you know what I mean) doing the can-can.
In the Taco Thong, which is remarkably similar to the Papi Thong.
I am open for art commissions: http://silvanoir.deviantart.com/journal/34701500/
but I’ll have to put “Taco thong” on my will-NOT-draw list.
Aww… I have no money. If I had some, I’d love to.
Maybe if some people would buy prints of my work, I could buy a drawing from Silva.
Silva, to quote many bad movies, everyone has a price. Don’t make me start a pledge drive :p
OK, for an insane amount of money, I’d draw it.
But you’d have it on your conscience that you paid oodles for a drawing of a tacothong.
Would not a taco thong be sheet music?
I lubs my tacos
They are so fun to eat
Crunchy shell, spicy meat;
Lettuce crispy & green
And picante so mean;
The cheese so yellow
O how it cures a fellow!
Taco!Taco!Taco! I wanna Taco!
Ick, scans badly in spanish:
Amo mi tacos
Son tan diversión a comer
Cáscara crujiente, carne picante;
Con curruscante de la lechuga;
Medio del verde y del picante tan;
Del queso el amarillo tan¡
O cómo cura a un compañero!
¡Taco! ¡Taco! ¡Taco! ¡Quiero al Taco!
Would that be Mrs. Schrodinger’s cat?
*Resists urge to say; “So there’s a pussy under that skirt?”*
Oops.
I expected that line from HamCan!
What?
You’re a bad influence, HC.
You’re gonna be in trouble with the Llama-nun!
Wow, and they have 4 of them for sale! Awesome!
I think the first three you can take em for free.
No. 4 with and 4 without the tablecloth. That makes 10.
And, number 1: The larch, the larch.
And, number 1: The larch, the larch.
Do you think if I offered them some vintage Crisco for all 12 tables they’d throw in the fider warch (ERROR:NOT FOUND)?
I find it so funny that Sparky took the photo with the tablecloth in a room with laminate flooring. Then, instead of just taking the tablecloth off and snapping another pic without, he opted to move it into another room first. The wonders never cease.
Well, since it’s a magic table and all, I’m assuming it was running around the house and he was just snapping pictures of it whenever he could get it to hold still.
Arthur: Thou art well come, my knights. Please be seated.
Lancelot: [sits down]
Percivale: Hey, I wanted that seat!
Lancelot: Thou snoozeth, thou looseth.
Percivale: [sighs loudly and tosses his head] Fine. [sits at an adjacent chair]
Lancelot: [thrusts two fingers in the air at Percyvale’s back as he sits]
Galahad: [to Lancelot] Couldst thou … knowest thou …
Lancelot: What?
Galahad: Movest thy callipygian rump to the right a smidgen?
Lancelot: Oh for pity’s sake, Galahad, if thou wouldst shed some girth thou would not require such vast tracts of chair!
Galahad: Ah, such coincidence, as I was just last eve telling thy mother the same thing!
Lancelot: Wouldst thou prefer to take this out of doors?
Gawain: Wouldst thou chattering magpies stuff thine pie holes?
Galahad: Mindeth thine own business, wench!
Bedivere: Excuse me, but may I inquire as to who is playing footsies with me?
Lionell: [to Bedivere] Sorry.
Percivale: [to Galahad] Stop kicking my shins!
Galahad: Look not to me!
Tristam: [whistles and looks away]
Safer: [enters the room] Apologies for my tardiness fellow knights, there was a carriage accident down yon thoroughfare. Wouldst someone be so kind as to fetch me a chair?
Gawain: [to Safer] There is no room. Thou canst bring that one over in yon corner and sit behind Bedivere.
Safer: That one? Over there?
Gawain: Aye.
Safer: That’s a high chair.
Gawain: Be not late next time.
Percivale: Would someone have knowledge as to whether there will be appetizers?
Lancelot: [smacks Percivale upside the head]
Galahad: ALE! I demand ale!
Tristam: Thou wilt get a boot to the posterior if thou dost not button thy maw.
Galahad: Shut up!
Arthur: SILENCE! I will not have this bickering at my table!
[The knights collectively quiet down]
Percivale: [to Galahad in a fierce whisper] Stop kicking!
Galahad: [smirks]
Arthur: Would the two of you prefer to attend this meeting in separate corners?
Galahad and Percivale: [sheepishly] Nooo…
Arthur: Good! Then I trust I will hear no more from you. Now, to the business at hand. Who ordered the duck a l’orange?
No wonder the table hid under a cloth.
Well, after that whole “Lancelot + Guinevere 4EVER” table carving incident and Arthur trying to buff it out with his sword, he had to cover up the mess somehow. It would be embarrassing if company dropped by.
I could swear it could be spelled either Percival or Parsifal, but not Percivale.
Firefox seems to agree.
I think it’s one of those “find the differences” pictures from the Sunday funnies.
Lets see…
1) Blue table cloth.
2)Floor
3)Door
4)Blue table is bigger
5)Asshat under table cloth
While Sparky may be a bit befuddled when it comes to math, he/she thoughtfully provided their own doors (two different varieties no less). We don’t have to distribute any of ours now.
If you scroll down fast enough it looks like a very short, very bad movie.
A pretentiously bad movie – I mean, there’s all this tension between the taller, cloth-covered table and the smaller plain one: is the larger table more menacing, or is the cloth cover an indication of femininity (with larger size also being an indication of femininity, per Pratchett’s Luggage in Interesting Times)? Do they ever get any closer together or further apart? What is the effect of their contrasting backgrounds of vintage mod flagstone and faux wood-look flooring (pergo?)?
There are all of these potentially intriguing issues between these tables, but the director just has them sitting there. It’s so static and boring.
“It is a good functional table.”
How does a table not function well? It can wobble a little bit, but it’s still a functioning table.
(Also, the word function looks weird; anyone agree with me?)
My idea of a “good functional table” is one that will not spontaneously alter it’s surroundings and will remain at a stable height with or without a tablecloth, but I’m weird that way.
I don’t know… a table that can shift through dimensions would be an interesting conversation piece.
(at a party)
person 1: Where’d the chips and dip go? They were just here, I set them down on…
person 2: oh, not the sometimes tablecothed taller, sometimes bare shorter table, did you?
person 1: … Yeah?
person 2: Well it’s mostly likely in the mirror world, 3 years from now
person 1: I’ll go to the store for more chips…
I think that was just Mr. Winkey party crashing and eating all the food.
Actually, I think a magic table that adjusts height randomly would be rather fun. Imagine eating soup on such a table…oh, oh, oh, that makes me think of Candid Camera. Can’t you just picture Allen Funt setting up this stunt?
NMN, I think you put the fun in function. 8) I used to work at a company that had a conference room table that was not often functional. It had squared ends, but bulged out along the long sides, and the legs were not placed in a position to support any weight on those bulges. Once I was helping set up for a birthday party in there, and someone leaned their callipygian rump on the edge of the table. The thing tilted, and I managed to catch the birthday cake as it slid off toward the floor. When my heart stopped racing around the room, we were able to repair the minor damage to the frosting and carry on as if nothing had happened!
Easy. For every input, the table returns only one unique output.
Well, does it have all the required Lages?
Hmm, that’s a good question. It looks like it it has 3 to begin with, so any less and it would definitely be a non-functional table…
Butte, prae prithee anthwer, ane notte thae lages sore stayn-ed?
Whithhee not be carpenter founde els we be peirced tru tae roote?
I’m sorry, I don’t speak gibberish. Tahw era uoy gniyas?
Come to think of it, it’s been a long time since I erected a table over 26″ tall. It’s a hard job, though.
Some would say it takes a lot of imagination.*
*And Viagra
Do you think you are up for it?
A 26″ tent doesn’t sound like it would be very stable, it would probably start sagging and collapse pretty quickly.
Sometimes, TM, I think you just drag a line around with you so you can jump over it. 🙂
So Taco is playing jumprope with the line?
More like leapfrog: “You bend over and I’ll jump from behind….”
SJ, I thought that’s what the ropes and stakes were for.
What?
TM – It’s a hard job, though.
Didn’t you mean hand?
Only if you have the $5.
Wow sj, you’re
cheapa bargain!Slapping someone could be considered a hand job. Unless you use a clue by four.
Round table with skirt
*Anagram fun*
Bad Knitters Out whirl (Seems obvious…)
Turbid Whisk Tolerant (Tolerance is the best policy)
Turkish Trowel Bandit (Be careful while gardening!)
Tahiti Low bred Trunks (New Tweener style?)
Do Ski Run With Bartlet (A pear of skis?)
Attention! Attention! The Turkish Trowel Bandit has escaped from your local asylum! He..errr no, she is considered to be extremely dangerous. Keep your doors and windows locked at all times. Thank you.
And your tool shed.
That’s what she said.
And make sure your barn door’s closed while your at it, otherwise she might steal your tractor.
What?
She’s slinging the Sparky Spackle.
I wonder if Sparky would sell just the skirt?
My bronze naked lady table could use it…
I’m sorry, but why are there four pictures of the same thing? I mean, it’s not that hard to put different pictures on an ad.
Mysterious are the ways of the Sparkies. Sucky, too.
for emphasis
To express man’s inhumanity to man.
Because the voices in Sparky’s head prefer things in multiples of four.
Maybe there are four voices, and each needed their own picture?
Because five is just redundant.
Signed,
C.J. Fugglewitz
Commissioner
Dept. of Redundancy Department
**phone rings, picks it up after it rings**
Department of Redundancies Department; with what can we help you with?
Pedantic Nonsense!
In case 4 people want to look at the ad at once.
The only thing redeeming about this ad was that the poster knew enough to say 26”, not 26′.
So…. Funny story… I don’t remember too much about what/why I was posting yesterday. I mainly remember thinking “I know they’ll think I’m weird, but THE WORLD HAS TO KNOW.” Thankfully, I’m mostly functional today, not feverish, and I made it to work (for the free lunch, you know). Christina, I’m glad I was able to amuse you. 🙂
Yeah, that’s why lots of people go to work, for the free lunch.
EB, you were funny. You may not drink, but I think we know what you would be like if you did!*
*Funny, and random. (Don’t worry. Where did you think I was going?)
Hey, at least you spelled everything right! Are you feeling better?
I’m mostly feeling better. I woke up feeling great, then felt awful, then OK, then awful, then great, then awful… I’m currently trying to muster the energy to clean the kitchen a bit -_- Maybe I need to post an ad on craigslist… I’m sure I have $20, and there are plenty of weeds in my garden 😀
[ICYWTK] Should you feel a compelling reason to review, go to the day’s listing and enter the Comments section. Press CTRL+F and enter “EclecticBkue” as the search term. Most browsers would then highlight and scroll to the matches.
I find this handy to find “next day” snark. So, if one wanted to find things posted after they left today, they could enter “september 2” as the search term.
[/FYI]
Maybe they figure you don’t have to cut 7″ off the legs to get rid of the stains if you have the table cloth. Maaaaaaybe… anyone?…. *crickets*
Anyone? Bueller? Bueller?
We prefer bad tables around here. So much for fun to play on.
[matt]The table has reformed himself in prison and is looking for a second chance at life. He has turned his life around by accepting Spice Christ as his personal savior while in prison and cutting all ties to his former gang of rogue credenzas and that faux Louis XXVI divan that gave him leg rot. He only wants to be functional, dammit!
And occasionally wear a pretty blue skirt.[/matt]
Band name of the day: Rogue Credenza.
Didn’t they have a pop hit, “Sofa so good”?
Aren’t they fronted by the cross-dressing Divan?
Hi guys. Funny story: I, uh, well….I kind of had a memory wipe, and forgot about YSaC for a few days. I KNOW, how can this happen???!!! I really don’t have a good explanation, but I blame You Tube, vodka, and sexual frustration. Yeah, I’ll go with those three, with a side of obsessive crime library reading.
ANYway, I’m back. And sorry I missed all the blatant line crossing this morning. I know me about some line crossing. I am the QUEEN of line crossing.
EDIT: wait a minute, I was HERE yesterday. I remember posting, but I don’t remember the DAY at all. I truly thought that was about four days ago.
Paging Meredith’s brain…paging Meredith’s brain.
*whistles*
C’mere brain! Come on! Meredith needs you!
Meredith, did you check under the table skirt?
So your yesterday was similar to mine? 🙂
Here Meredith…will this one do?
:hands Meredith brain-filled jar labeled “Abby….” something, I can’t remember:
Abby…..Normal. Yes, that sounds about right
YF…FTW!
It’s alright, we all have lapses in YSaC attendance. Just as long as you weren’t attacked by zomb…
I think I know how those stains got there.
Megan, the ‘im just a girl so i cant help you lift it..’ must’ve used the table when she went inside her free plastic outdoor house.
snakes are icky!
Judging from the numerous photos, this is probably an occasional table. Don’t ask me what it is the rest of the time.
It’s a world famous sous chef who fights crime under the name The Tripodian Tableau on alternate weekends.
You know, if we was any kinda decent we’d block Astro’s computer from this site…at least for today…
CJ, I honestly don’t think it would help. He is a teenage boy … and I remember coming home from high school and telling my mother that my average day there, in terms of language if not content, was frequently R-rated. I don’t think we’re much if any worse than his contemporaries – smarter and better educated, though!
Yeah…but I’d feel better….LOL
The R-rated school stuff I remember was soooooooo not like the reality…it wasn’t even like pron…it was…well, it was what teenagers who think they know about stuff when they don’t really have a clue would say.
*Stares off into space whistling*
Hammie….YOU better just walk away…quietly….
I wasn’t even close to the worse line crosser today 😛
It got crossed early and often today.
Michael: “That’s what she said!”
He’s a teenage boy who goes to public school and has access to the internet – I don’t think there’s much left that would be a shock.
Mebbe so…SJ…but the Mom/Grandma in me screams “Must not have THAT kind of interaction with man-child.” repeatedly.
He said some kid who’d lived in Japan told him what hentai was. I only learned about it (and not by choice) a couple of years ago, and I’m just about old enough to be his mother. I learned a few things by having parents who weren’t overly restrictive about what I could take out of the library (e.g. I read The Godfather when I was 13) and imagine that with the internet, knowledge has increased accordingly.
Even if no one is reading this, I know about one thing that could possibly (hopefully) be a shock.
And frankly, *much* less profane…
*Edit* Grrr, this comment was supposed to be under Lola’s “smarter/better educated” comment…
According to my thirteen year old nephew, the first words out of his mouth after he broke his arm was a stream of profanity that impressed even the paramedics. I don’t mind him cursing around me, as long as it’s not gratuitous, since I figure he needs some way to get it out of his system. He is under strict orders not to curse around his little sisters, though.
The thing about most of today’s line crossing is that it wasn’t explicit. A lot of innuendo. Which means that one already has to have an idea of what inappropriate about it to understand the inappropriateness.
So if Astro understands the non-PG rated stuff above, it’s not our fault. He had to have learned about it somewhere else first.
Hi.
Oh, and also, to respond to CJ’s original comment, I’d just find a way in through a proxy or my mom’s laptop.
You can’t keep me out of the Snark Lounge.
CJ, the Mom/Grammy in me hears you loud and clear. That being said, Astro strikes me as a smart enough young man to be able to tell the difference. He comes across as having a depth of perception, an ability to express himself and an awareness of the world around him (in all manifestations) to a greater degree than many kids his age, which means he has a great deal of knowledge upon which to draw. His comments show he has manners, a good sense of humor and decent sense of judgment. And, in my opinion, the vast majority of the regular commentators here know that he is a teen-ager (and not the only one), and we respect that fact. The jest and snark are all in fun and careen in multiple directions about multiple topics (from poignant to bawdy) without that nasty undercurrent. One reason why I love YSaC…bees be upon the Llamanun for her creation.
I’d like to add I’ve done my share of line-crossing too.
Now, I haven’t tentaraped the line or anything like that, but I’ve certainly jumped
onover it and sent it scurrying for safety.Speaking of which, someone ought to track down our first use of “crossing the line” as a meme here for that thread over in the forum.
many python routines come to mind….
This is pretty darned off topic, even for something off topic, but I have a virtual marching band in an online marching band game*:
http://micromarching.com/band/933/ish-notalion-regiment
It’s the Ish Not.A.Lion. Regiment.
The idea is that it’s sort of a YSaC Marching Band.
So, to make it somewhat realistic, I’d like to ask you all a question:
If you could play any of the following instruments in a marching band, what would it be?
Contra (it’s like a Tuba)
Baritone
Mellophone (like a French Horn)
Trumpet
Tenor Drum
Bass Drum
Snare Drum
You could also pick Color Guard.
You see, I’m going to use what numbers I get as the number/types of marchers in the shows.
*Yes, I’m a giant megageek.
Oooh! Oooh! Snare drum!
Clarinet.
If it was good enough for 5 years of real marching band, surely you can live with one in your virtual band. 😀
The problem is that I’m not a premium subscriber, so I don’t get Woodwinds or Trombones.
Ok then. Mellophone!
I want the OBO!
Or can I just march across the line?
Sure, you can be a guard girl!
Whoohoo! I’ll borrow the Taco thong!!
Put me on mellophone and drmk on baritone.
Glockenspiel. How do ya’ll like my cute puppies?
What?
Could I just wave a flag or something? Years of accordion lessons proved I should take up accounting. I’m sure Papa and Mama Eyebrows were VERY grateful we had a basement. With a door. And very good insulation. Although I did once play on the same stage as Myron Floren. I think the other 100 or so accordionists managed to drown me out. Thankfully.
Myron Floren!
For some reason, I went through a weird phase during single-digit ages where I liked the Lawrence Welk show. Yeah, I don’t get it either.
Mom loved L.W.
Grandpa taught L.W. at one time.
Since mom was one of gramp’s younger children and I’m one of her youngest, I still think perfect pitch is when you toss a banjo into the dumpster and it pierces the accordian.
-with apologies to all musicians who do not share my myoptic views.
I did too, Lola…think it was because my Grandma was a huge fan and I adored her.
I have absolutely zero musical talent.
To the point in music class in school, the teachers would beg me not to sing (I was the only one singled out) and whenever anyone tried to teach me an instrument, I would fail miserably. I was never insulted by any of it, I know I’m bad.
The closest I came to band was hanging out with people in one.
About all I’m good for is designing a cover for a CD.
The point is if you could. It’s all virtual and imaginary. I’m just trying to get some (hopefully skewed enough to be funny) numbers so that my virtual band can have some more personality than just the default block given me.
So, I think I’ll put you on the biggest bass drum.
MrEB always thought I’d be a good trumpet player, but I have the same problem as Silva 🙂
EB…So many lines that I am resisting crossing.
I think I reached my quota for the day.
Admirable restraint. We’ve all had to take up the slack in the line because of it. I’m exhausted. Good night. 🙂
Yeah… apparently I don’t get band jokes, because that one was lost on me *shrugs*
What, no cowbell?
Put me on drums because so far your percussion section is all girls, which defies my theory that girls don’t play drums because they’re too smart to be the butt of drummer jokes*.
*Husband-monkey is a drummer and I like picking on him**
**Almost said “yanking his chain.” Thought better of it.
You get to be a tenor drum.
Dang, I played bells in marching band. I guess tenor drum would be doable, since you don’t have flutes. Wheee! When is uniform fitting day?
Hmm, no triangle option, so color guard with that cool Archie.
Air guitar (I’m now back from my first day of college, at 11 p.m.).
My avatar has been changed. If you do not care for my avatar not being “cute” enough, notify me and I will change it. Otherwise…..
Cute is fun, but not necessary… Have you SEEN kittyshark? Or whatshisbucket with the black guy and hippo mouth? 🙂
I’ll go with the contra.
Wait, they don’t call them sousaphones anymore?
Or would that be a contrabass bugle,
because valves can be so confusing sometimes.
*Still looking for a decent contrabassoon.
Drum corps has slightly different instrumentation than standard marching bands.
I’ll blow a Baritone, thanks.
What?
Well, MrEB was a baritone in college marching band, so technically just last week I…. Wait, what was that about some “line” thing?
*Waves at EB is a very deep voice*
Definitely snare. Or the quads, but since they aren’t an option, snare for Lou.
By Tenor Drum, I meant Quints. I don’t know what I was thinking. However, since I’m allowed a max of three of them, you get snare.
Color guard!
Trumpet.
Vuvuzela!?
Well, OK then, Mellophone – we’ll keep it in the family.
Oooh, drums!
I can’t play them, but I like hitting things.
So do I!
***Did King Arthur’s issues have Limericks?***
I have a square table that’s round.
The top’s nineteen inches from ground.
When covered in cloth.
Gain seven it doth.
And that, without making a sound.
This functional table is nice.
And such legs it has they are thrice.
A little blue skirt.
That’s more than just pert.
Gains seven, I must say it twice.
Good table without being dense.
Good body, kept up, and no dents.
The top is pressed wood.
But that’s understood.
Gains seven, it does when it tents.
Maintain the said table as sloth.
Allow not the table to froth.
Or legs will have stains.
When seven it gains.
But the stains won’t show under cloth.
Lines are sooooo overrated.
Gemenon, our methane breathing friend! Congrats on not sucking and here’s your card. Hold it a little lower, please. Punchity punch punch!
G’Night, Camelot!
Oh geezes! Help Mr Wizard!
{…..i love each and every one of you (in my own way)…..}
Drizzle, drazzle, druzzle, drome; time for this one to come home…….
**Flash;Puff-of-Smoke**
Help Mr. Wizard, I want snark forever more.
Quoth the YSACer, always more.
Bees be with ya’ll y’all.
G’nite Monty Python.
Surprised nobody’s brought this up (but this could be a “maybe its just me” moment) but I like how the table actually does kinda look taller in the picture(s) with the cloth…
Edit, because I don’t think I can on my phone: And yes, I know it’s the perspective and the zoom or distance from the lens or whatever. But that’s still what I see…
[matt*] C’mon you people! This is obvious! OP took a picture of the table. A Picture! So, it is tall one way and high the other. Really! a picture is flat, it can be tall or high, not wide or deep!it’s a p[ictire! And they’re have to be all thoise pictures, how else can your see all five lages?
[/matt]
________________________
* Yes, a mock-matt, for deliberate satirical effect.
After reading all of yesterday’s comments, I wonder if the line even exists anymore.
It regenerates, like a lizard’s tail. That way we can cross it over and over again.
*click*
:sigh:
*click*
:sigh:
*click*
:sigh: