YSaC, Vol. 1091: Meme week, Day 1: French Prudential
Over the weekend, I tried to whet your appetite for French Provincial mayhem. Those of you who are regular readers of the site will remember that French Prudential/Pervential/Preventional furniture has been a mainstay of YSaC lore … so I thought I’d show you what has developed since the last time we encountered Sparkys who are trying to be classy. Surely people must be learning, right?
Small round glass top dining table with 4 chairs – $125
Darling table with light wood chairs, french provential style, round glass top about 5inches across, and light upolstered chairs. $125.00 cash only
I’m sure it’s darling; if it’s only 5 inches across it’s darling enough for a dollhouse, darling.
French Perventional bedroom suite – $200
The fact that this is a bedroom suite makes me worrywonder (yes, that’s a word) what this Sparky was getting up to in there, or if this was just some kind of a Freudian slip. I’ve heard about those French and their predilections for covering themselves in sliced meat and cheese and singing Ethel Merman songs.
French Credential furniture – $2000
Ah, the French. They have to make everything official, don’t they? They even have to give their furniture official titles. “We cannot sleep on zis furniture until eet has eets credentials. And also because eet has been perventionaled.”
french pervintial coffee table – $125
very nice vintage french provintial coffee table with a drawer on each end good condition.
225.00 reduced to 125.00
Hi, Sparky? I have a question about your coffee table. Is it pervintial or provintial? Yes, it makes a difference; one I have to dip in bleach before I set my coffee mug on it.
Antique Sofa – $75
Antique French Pavintial Sofa. Salmon color. Roughly 70 inches long. $75.00 or OBO. Cash only.
Oh, now you’re just not even trying.
Thanks to our own Ms. Eyebrows, Lucy, Cheryl, Nicole, and Dana!
OMG, I’m always a lurker never a commenter…but I couldn’t pass up the chance to be FIRST!
*inserts snarky and witty comment here*
(I think my favorite variation here is “perventional,” I always heard the French were a bit perverted about s-e-x…)
Welcome, LurkyLoo! Please feel welcome to comment more!
*insert appropriately snarky reply to snarky and witty comment, leaving just enough information for the next snarker to continue the thread*
Get thee a non-quilt!
You know, I was aware from friends living in la Republique Francaise that the bureaucracy and red tape there were ridiculous, but having to have one’s home furnishings credentialled – and for more money than any of the other items listed, it appears – is just completely ridiculous!
I thought it was far more interesting that they had to, possibly, credentialize their perventional furniture. Having lived in Europe for 8 years I knew they were a bit… errr…looser in their lifestyles but I thought this might go far above and beyond.
Does the first one come with a Stonehenge model?
Spinal Tap reference?
Yes. Stonehenge, where the demons dwell and the furniture is perventional.
And the knobs on the amps go up to 11.
Just once I want to see Sparky try to tell those twins on Antique Roadshow that his furniture is Providential, et al. I’d love to see them flip their shit.
I Googled “flipthisshit.com” and the domain name doesn’t seem to be taken. I’ll race ya fer it, Sis!
Buy low – sell high……..
“french pervintial coffee table”
*checks reference books* Ah, yes. This table was used when the wine was served, but only one glass of any one bottle could be served at this table. Once per vintage, as it were.
I will bypass the ottermangling in order to ask about two things that are puzzling me:
1) Wouldn’t a light upholstered chair be rather uncomfortable to sit in?
and
2) Do you serve your vintage pervintial table with meat or fish?
Yes.
Must be fish. Salmon. See, it says so right —-^ there!
3. Profit!
I’d love the glowing furniture. I could use the money I save on my lighting bill to purchase that turtle-racing franchise I’ve always wanted.
Apparently I’m a little chilly this morning.
Well, your quilt is a bit thin – more like Irish lace…….
Paper dog-eared snowflakes.
Yeah, kinda thin coverage there, Ghostie. *cough cough* So, you’re Jewish, eh?
Why, oh why can we not
perventprovintcredentpavintkeep Sparky le Sparklecheuse from posting ads?Won’t someone think of the children??
You don’t … hate … children … DO YOU????
OT…and grrrrrrrr….sigh….grrrrrrr……..
My mirror is off sick again today.
And I now have double duty for normal work and we have a team of auditors coming in two hours and I’ve no time to snark!
This is intolerable!
“My mirror is off sick again today. ”
Am I reading that right or do my meds need to be tweaked again?
Yes.
Definitely. Way past due.
See if they’ll give you one of those fancy self-hugging coats as well.
Snuggie® Straight Jacket in a nice leopard print.
If they come with feet I’m all over them.
New meds will also help you remember that Ghostie is female, and therefore a thin quilt will give you no hints about her religion. 8) I’m a helper.
Yeah, you have to do it the old-fashioned way – throw holy water on me and see if I burst into flames.
I want to snark, really. But the French have prevented it.
That’s just because you’re spelling it wrong. The Perventional contingent prefers le snarque, from what I hear.
Viva le Snarque!
Is that like the Cirque de snarque?
Only if you add the weird lilting music…
*rushes in door*
Got 30 seconds left after wolfing down my lunch to say…
I just remembered something!
My very first foray into comment reading, and my first lesson in NEVER eating/drinking/breathing whilst reading commentary by YSaCers, was a post whose title was “Shouldn’t We Have Prevented Hitler, Instead?” or something like that….it was all about French Prevential furniture.
I’ve never been the same since.
Thank you.
*rushes back out the door….*
*wraps up a piece of cake in a to-go box*
Take dessert with you. You must be having a Monday too.
There’s cake????
Well, NOT ANYMORE! Muwahahahahahaha!
*runs like the wind*
And if you had visited the reduxes . . .reduxii? The posts that redux old posts, over the weekend, you would have seen the very post itself. 8)
I’m becoming a weekend one-hit
onederwonder.Same here. It’s like the night-shift is sucking my snark right out of me and the only time I find anything amusing to say is when there’s no competition.
OT — I want to apologize for being in a finger pointing, not very cheery kind of mood. Must be Monday. Not even all the TacoMagic in the box can save me!
I’ll share the cake I stole, if it helps. It’s banana.
Parrots have fingers?
I think this one has a bionic arm. It’s a bit worn though – could be anteak, except it’s not made of wood.
It’s not worn.
It’s just a little sad.
Come on, YSaC, let’s cheer up Windy’s bionic arm! We need to take perventional action before it starts pining for the fjords!
*pffft* Haven’t you ever heard of chicken fingers? *rolls eyes*
and buffalo wings
I don’t care what you tell me.
No matter how many times I sit in that stupid chair, it never goes to Provential. And same thing with that Pervential bed, it just doesn’t know how to have a good time. I’m just disgusted with this furniture I bought on credit. Thoroughly disgusted.
Well, Mr. One-hit per weekend Wonder Taco, Here’s a one-two Punchity Punch Punch!
G’night Bonsall!
Woohoo! *rubs cheek*
*click*
Sigh
*click*
Sigh
*click click*
Sigh.
OMG! Where’s the new post? What will we do, Taco? I’m skeered.
I don’t know Monkey. I think there’s a pamphlet here somewhere that tells us what to do. Aren’t we supposed to sit behind a woman clutching a baby?
Check the lounge, maybe there’s an emergency kit somewhere. Maybe it will have snacks. And reading material. And emergency contact numbers.
My pamphlet says to call 1-800-xxx-xxxx.