2008 November 19
by drmk

Parties Favors

For Birthdays,Weddings,BABY SHOWERS,Batptism,Bacherlor parties ETC

( xxx )xxx – xxxx

You can only call that number if you are interesting. Everyone who’s interesting, pick up the phone. … Not so fast, you!

The Batptism ceremony is a little-known ceremony in which a young child is struck in the head by a whiffleball bat, thus signifying their entry into the early childhood torture system popularly known as “Little League”.

I don’t think I want to know what kind of favors someone would order for a bachelor (or bacherlor) party, but I’m pretty sure it might involve hi dusting.

26 Responses leave one →
  1. 2009 November 29

    Na na na na na na na na na — BAT-PTISM!

    “Holy water, Batptman! Dunk that baby!”

    Adores: 11
    • 2010 March 1
      Bahtmahn permalink

      Is somebody calling me?

      Oh… sorry about that. This happens to me all the time.

      Adores: 1
  2. 2009 November 30

    Oh, oh! I’m interesting and can reach! I love “Batptism” too! If only drmk/ dan didn’t x out the numbers.

    Adores: 0
    • 2015 February 16
      Tankerbell permalink

      I’m surprised at you. Snarkers are worldly and cultured, yet not one of you is familiar with the Batptism ceremony, wherein a religous figure takes a bat and hits a child or new-fledged member of the faith repeatedly about the head and neck until he sees God?

      Adores: 0
  3. 2009 November 30
    tigprincess permalink

    I’m more intrigued by Bach Erlor. Thi is obviously a reference to one of the musical Bachs and also Erlor http://de.bebo.com/Profile.jsp?MemberId=6196359851 who seems to be into vampires from my initial curosry glance at his page.
    So we have parties favors that iclude classical music and vampire fans – now that is something I’m interesting in and can reach ….
    Jami_no_e I echo your complaint about drmk/dan x-ing out the numbers

    Adores: 0
  4. 2009 November 30
    Addicted Reader permalink

    At first I was bothered by the lack of spaces after the commas, but then I found them – between the parentheses and the area code, on either side of the dash in the phone number, and before the colon. But that makes one too many. The balance of spaces is still off! This post may implode at any moment!!

    Adores: 1
    • 2009 December 1

      Don’t cross the streams, A. R.! That would be bad.

      Adores: 2
  5. 2009 December 4
    tacomagic permalink

    I am leaving my stench of cominos and chili powder all over this entry… per Isaac’s request.

    I hope you’re real proud of yourself Isaac.

    On topic: I wonder if party favors for all those various events are packaged in the same room. The juxtaposition of sending the bachelor party box to the wrong client is rather… fun.

    Adores: 2
  6. 2010 January 11
    Pez4me42 permalink

    I’m baffled by their need to shout BABY SHOWERS, but none of the other occasions.

    And for the love of God, the word is anyone. Why is this so hard for people? “Some one”, “some where”, “no body” (now that one is just disturbing). I can’t take it any more.

    Adores: 0
  7. 2010 February 22
    kate permalink

    “No body” just made me cry. That would be a head right?

    I think the “any one” part is maybe referring to any of those parties sound interesting? Like you pick, any one of them.

    Adores: 0
  8. 2010 February 28
    Windrose permalink

    Did I miss the party? I especially hope I missed the Pin the Gazongas on the Stripper game in the Bach Erlor party.

    Personally, I ain’t got no body that I can depend on. For example, I’ve gotten used to the hip and leg not working so well. Now I have a pulled muscle somewhere near my back regions. Ow!

    Adores: 1
  9. 2010 March 1
    CapnMac permalink


    Would that be when a member of BCI (Bat Conservation International) takes a person out to Bracken Cave for their first experience of a major bat emergence?

    (Thanks to R for mine, in any event.)

    Adores: 0
  10. 2010 March 4
    mudslicker permalink

    I’m thinking about having an ETC party. Will need plenty of parties’ favors. Surprise me!!!

    I’m interesting and have arms so I can reach. If this party is a success, I will contact you regarding any upcoming BABBY SHOWERS in the future.

    Adores: 1
  11. 2012 August 18
    D / DM permalink

    This is a joke, right? Please tell me drmk didn’t miss yet another drug reference.

    Everyone knows what ETC (“etstisy”) is and why it is used at bacherlor parties. It is also reputedly loads of fun while welding (“Weddings” being a typo here).

    Adores: 1
  12. 2012 August 18

    It’ll never work. People will hire you and then argue endlessly over whether Batman prefers infant batptism or believers’ batptism.

    Adores: 2
  13. 2012 August 18

    It’s perfect! I’ve always wanted a Batman-themed wedding/birthday party!

    :calls Sparky:

    What do you mean “That’s not what you meant”?!? Look, buddy, you bring me my Batman wedding favors or I will go bridezilla on your ass!

    No, I’m not getting married anytime soon. I just like to plan ahead.


    He hung up on me!

    Adores: 1
  14. 2012 August 18
    penguin permalink

    I wasn’t interesting but I clicked on the link. Does that now make me interesting?

    Adores: 3
  15. 2012 August 18
    One Moving Violation permalink

    My one reached from Nevada to Kansas and back. On a trip from City of Industry, CA to Lawrence, KS, I stopped at Railroad Pass Casino in Henderson, NV. I had only one dollar. Not enough to pay for anything on my trip like meals and tolls. I turned my dollar into $101.75. When I came back through Henderson from Lawrence, I had $1.00 left. In fact, I made it back to California with it. You see, I know how to stretch a dollar, but that’s if I only have one.
    I hope you found this interesting, although nobody did me no favors, parties or otherwise.

    Adores: 1
  16. 2012 August 18
    Brer Fox permalink

    I found “The One” interesting. No, the other “The One”, the one with Jet Li. I’m still waiting for the sequel, “The One Two”.

    Adores: 1
  17. 2012 August 18

    Parties Favors- n, Sparkish, To indicate a subset of different celebratory accoutrements within a larger whole. Ex: “The Sergeants Major had throwing stars and lemon juice squirt guns as their parties favors.”

    Adores: 2
    • 2012 August 18
      CapnMac permalink

      If that is all that is shown during the parties of Master Chiefs and Sergeants Major, one should count one’s self lucky.

      Lest one find one’s self very interesting, yet out of reach of the next round. This is also where and when one finds that the floor is covered in ETC, and where one has to hope those are Bats that are sprinkling.

      (There are many reasons that the CPO Quarters on a ship are called “The Goat Locker”–some are sublime, some ridiculous, some prosaic.)

      Adores: 0
  18. 2012 August 18

    I’m very interesting, but I am in the witness protection program, so I can’t be recognized. And I so wanted a party por favor!

    Adores: 0
  19. 2012 August 18
    Demon Duck of Doom permalink

    Any one interesting, but any two more interesting: bacherlor showers, bat birthdays, baby weddings…

    Adores: 2
  20. 2012 August 19

    Capn Mac, the box missed you! Glad you could spend some time in there yesterday. Punchity Punch Punch!

    Good Morning, City of Industry!

    Adores: 0

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