YSaC, Vol. 1771: The Grand Cherokee of the Beast!

2014 October 20

1997 jeep – $666

1997 jeep grand cherokee odometer: 200000 automatic transmission title : clean
Jeep grand Cherokee 200,000 miles runs good .4×4..believe it may need a trans? Really Clean in side and out good tires remote start ….really looking to trade for something cool thanks….really want a project car or truck

This one was sent in by sd, who points out that if the only picture you have of your vehicle is one where it’s strapped to a trailer AND you think it needs a transmission…

You may not need to go to Craigslist to find a “project car.”

Thanks, sd!

YSaC, Vol. 1770: I’m NOT sleeping on a #*%($ Sealy!

2014 October 17
by dan

Kit A sends this one:

free bed all stains 40 years old!

Free twin box spring and mattress in old stained shape, all stains guaranteed to be over 40 years old. Got a bed wetter this is the free bed for you! Daisy pattern in great shape minus the 40 year old pee stains.
Put a cover on it for the in-laws stay this holiday they will never know! Smells fine well a little musty from the garage but absolutely no pee smell!
Will deliver to [location] only!!

Ah, 40 year old pee stains. That would date them from 1974. 1974 was a good vintage in [location] for pee stains. The 1974 Daisy Pattern is known for having notes of polyester and macrame, with just a hint of cocaine. Definitely worth picking this one up, before the poster puts it up for auction at Christie’s.

YSaC, Vol. 1769: Federal Burrow of Investigation

2014 October 15

Free burrow pick up only

Free burrow all wood it’s in good condition nothing is broken as far as drawers or anything just needs cosmetic work just sanding, painted and new drawer handles. First person to respond gets it only serious people please respond.

Hello. I am a very serious person. I would like to pick up your all wood burrow. However, I am confused. A “burrow” is a hole, is it not? It is difficult to pick up an absence of thing. For that matter, how do you know the hole is an absence of wood? It could be an absence of molybdenum, or cheddar cheese. This is important to me, because I am a serious person.

Of course, you could have just misspelled “burro.” Are you selling a donkey? Because I don’t think I want to try sanding a donkey. That would be insufficiently serious.

Thank you for this serious post, Christine!

YSaC, Vol. 1768: And the dog goes…

2014 October 13

Sometimes, the crazy on Craigslist inspires us to write long, detailed, lovingly crafted operas, movie scripts, or children’s books. And sometimes, it just inspires us to back away slowly, gibbering.

new to taxidermy need big dog

looking for a new taxidermy project looking for a large female dog will pay 40 the fresher the dog the better not looking for a living dogs need by Oct. 11 I can pick up sometime in the morning if you’re in [location]


(Thanks, Ellen.)

YSaC, Vol. 1767: Tear me down

2014 October 10

Demo guys needed commercial

Demo guys
I’m looking for demo guys that kill themselves no posers I’m only looking for the 1% 0f guys that give you 10 hrs work in a 8 hr day this is what I need .Do not bullshit me you will be fired the first day
I am looking for the guys that want to work not feed a habit if you cannot lift at least 80 lbs on a regular basis beat it I’m sick of guys that say they can work and bitch and moan fuck you my team works hard and is a close nit bunch If you talk to much this crew is not for you we don’t speak we work no fat guys no drugs no bullshit drama with I don’t have a ride don’t have a hard hat don’t have boots fuck off this is real world if you want it work for it good … it will not be handed to you this is the military type job if you think you got what it takes reply

I think I see why you have such a high turnover problem here, Sparky McBossypants. If you keep hiring guys that kill themselves, that may be why they don’t last too long in your “close nit bunch.” Or they may just not like all the nits. Plus, you have to spend so much time picking the nits. Do I want the lime nit, or the grape nit? Picking is hard. I prefer military type jobs, where I just get told which nits I want to pick.

Thanks for the ad, some guy!

YSaC, Vol. 1766: Al-bert, Al-bert, A-a-a-al-bert(sons)

2014 October 8

RARE Vintage Albertsons Albertson’s Plastic Bakery Bread Bag – $20

RARE vintage Albertsons Albertson’s plastic bakery bread freezer bag. Roughly 4″ x 12″. Used condition. I could not find another one anywhere on the Internet. These were meant to be thrown away, so to find one is rare. See pictures for condition and style.

Hey Sparky, I’ve got a tip for you: “meant to be thrown away” means “meant to be thrown away.”

Just so you know.

Thanks for the post, OMV!